*starts singing halfway through his inauguration*

it's coronation you dumb burger

>Does a wizard have to fight all his life?
>Only in death to take flight to the skies
>Rohan warmongers vie to take my throne
>No respect is ever shown
>In borderland raids
>They came in their Rohirrim hordes
>Ransacking Dunlending villages
>With nothing to lose
>Bold, sturdy, fearless and cruel
>Converting entire horse-lord tribes by the sword
>in the of Sauron, our Lord
youtube.com/watch?v=cvKRbi2ovDY

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at least post the good version without the shitty singer
youtube.com/watch?v=KRggwyNS5Pc

Kino

Where are his eyebrows?

He was happy

What was his endgame?

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He was remembering the time he killed a Balrog and thinking about how he could've done the Fellowships job by himself but didn't because he was having sex

Tolkien was all about the singing and the music. He loved it.

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Frodo is what you get when you're playing an RPG and you pick the default dialogue option / moral choice every time. Then at the end you fail your final Will roll and the DM has to pull some bullshit to give you a happy ending.

Literally a crossbreed between The Rock and Legolas

>comes to his wedding even after being rejected*

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Oh yeah this exists. Is it good?

TOMMY USED TO WORK ON THE DOCKS

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That smug motherfucker being Glorfindel is now my headcanon, thanks.

Her kingdom does not want to pay higher taxes just because she disrespected the king

she got lucky, Aragorn has a micropenis, but Faramir is known to be THE most hung guy in Gondor, possibly one of the biggest in the Middle Earth. his cock has been described as "the phial of Galadriel", with gargantual thickness that would rival the cave troll and Elendil himself. im estimating his size to be at least 8.5" bone pressed, with OVER 7" of girth. he will have absolutely destroyed Eowyn's pussy.

they would have spent hours and hours on foreplay, getting herself wet enough just so she can take it. i can just imagine her begging for it, with Faramir barely able to force it past the knob, and Eowyn moaning and squirming, demanding him to force it in deeper. she would have orgasm'd within seconds of taking the entire length, being filled and stretched right up to her cervix.. the orgasm would have been powerful, with her vaginal muscles clamping down on Faramir's throbbing monstrosity, her whole body quivering in euphoria..

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>All this stupid shit about Faramir
Now Boromir on the other hand

There are no citizens in Gondor, only King's subjects

>inauguration
it's called Coronation, you twæt

Aw shit, I'm sorry user, I give a fuck

>Denethor learns of his son's death when the guards spot Boromir's massive cock floating downstream past Osgiliath.
Always found this part a bit farfetched

fuck you now I can't unsee it

>The rule of Gondor is mine
What did he mean by this?

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>Twas in the darkest depths of Mordor, I met a girl so fair...

I am the Stewardship

Where we're going we don't need any eyebrows.

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I don't remember that scene from the movies... Was that a new firework Gandalf brought to the Shire?

Kek

Kek

>inauguration

actually loled

Can anyone explain to me what actually are taters?

Childhood is shitting on Frodo like a contrarian
Adulthood is realising he's the true hero

She marries Faramir, you dumb moviefag

>works for a literal wizard
>gets his mind blown by gunpowder

why?

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>implying steward loyalists lead by Faramir wouldn't rebel against Aragorn and make Gondor plunge into a bloody civil war

Why wasn’t Eomer there?

po-tat-toes

>Samwise give me some tots

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Gandalf wit the gat

WAKE UP IN THE MORNING FEELING LIKE P DIDDY

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idk why this made me kek so much, its so innocent like old memes

You misspelt Sam

Well, what can you do with them

HIGH IN THE HALLS OF THE KINGS WHO ARE GONE

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this wizard doesn't make firey explosions. he basically just has a magically persuasive voice, which isn't demonstrated well in the movies.
the technology to explode things would still be impressive.

best version coming through

youtube.com/watch?v=XFbPiUEA62A

>pure accident

Check out the guy who doesn't believe in Eru Iluvatar

>they have to save themselves
>me unleashing melkor/sauron/balrogs is not cause for doing anything myself tho lol

fuck eru illavatar and fuck god

he was

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why did Theoden choose Eowyn over Eomer as his heir?
was that a movie only thing?

*edit. Coronation not inauguration
RIP my inbox

>and everyone clapped

>why did Theoden choose Eowyn over Eomer as his heir?
He didn't.

>Extended
>720p
>.mkv
Go back

he was happy to see one of his women getting MENNED

what's the problem here?

I really loved his song, I wish it was longer

Was it autism ?

Extended cut is terrible, 720p is shit and .mkv is a shit format

It's not her kingdom. Based Eomer, aka best side character gets the crown and he's Aragorn's bro, his retarded Disney princess wannabe sister doesn't matter

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>watching theatrical shit with no Saruman death
.mkv is standard container, and I had to get 720p for the filesize

Theoden did that under the assumption that he and Eomer would die in battle. Based Eomer survived, so he gets the crown.

He is supposed to be Glorfindel. Look it up

>Implying the saruman death is good

>inauguration
George, please learn some early medieval history you fucking clueless boomer butterball.

Top kek, actually made me laugh out loud

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Merry and Pippen didn't do anything to help

How come Saruman did not kill Theoden? I can understand with Gandalf, maybe bring him over to his side, very useful, or at least to wait until he told him where the ring was, but Theoden? What would he gain from him remaining alive?

They got the Ents to actually do something at a critical time, when left to their own devices they would’ve taken too long and been wiped out.
Because of Merry and Pippin they were able to surprise Saruman and destroy his ENTIRE war machine in one fell swoop.

They distracted an entire force of orcs to allow the Rohhirim to kill them all easily.

>yo dudes imma go fuck this elf chick and these hobbits be ballin' nigga like they kinna fucked everything up but dat frodo nigga carried a ring an' shit

Eomer was by far the most worthy. Fuck Theoden if he's going to pull some shit.

He had saved Gondor from the forcers of Mordor and had the support of Rohan. Bitch I hope you try.

Thanks for the hearty chuckle user

Influence in Rohan. With Theoden killed his son takes over and Grima didn't have control over him

But Grima would lose his influence anyway.

>“Out of the Great Sea to Middle-earth I am come. In this place will I abide, and my heirs, unto the ending of the world”, Elendil somberly says after surviving the Downfall of Numenor and the Change of the World
>3040 years later
>Aragorn just sings it up as if it were Gondor’s Got Talent
Was it autism?

>when secondaries reveal themselves

He literally fires explosions out of his staff from the top of his tower down at The Fellowship when they are looking up at him nigger

How could they all hear each other from the top of Isengard?

BOIL THEM

MASH THEM

OR PERHAPS DAUPHAINOISE

Who gave the best speech?

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magic, they hear each other from fucking leagues away up in the mountains user
youtu.be/YH4Xr6GIp4U

What happened to the two other wizards?

supposedly started magical cults in the east that undermined saurons rule. Tolkien states their activities prevented catastrophe coming to the west.

DOWN IN THE DEEP OF GOBLIN TOWN

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the extended shire scenes are nice

What kind of magic power would dwarfs and elfs have if they put on the One Ring? We know hobbits become invisible because they're a race of beings who don't like attention and like to hide in the hills, and we know humans become strategic masterminds when they wear the One Ring because they're ambitious. What racial bonus would dwarfs and elfs receive? What about if a Uruk-Hai wore the One Ring?

White shores, and beyond: a far green country, under a swift sunrise.

>We know hobbits become invisible because they're a race of beings who don't like attention and like to hide in the hills
Wrong. It makes all Men invisible because it pulls them to the realm of the Unseen.
>we know humans become strategic masterminds when they wear the One Ring because they're ambitious
Now that’s the kind of buff the ring gives, but to all powerful kings and rulers of any species. If Galadriel or Elrond were to use it to defeat Sauron, the Ring would enhance their power over others, and make them able to summon great armies against Sauron.
>What racial bonus would dwarfs and elfs receive?
Dwarves cannot Ben made invisible or wraiths due to how they were made, but they could use the Ring to do what I said above, plus getting gold. Same for elves.
>What about if a Uruk-Hai wore the One Ring?
It depends on which origin do you think orcs should have.

>realm of the Unseen
what. Frodo went fucking invisible, so did Gollum and Bilbo.

Not really, it's alot more in Bilbo's perspective. Theatrical introduced Frodo way better by starting the movie with him, Extended kinda fucks it up and it fucks it up even more by having Bilbo talk over Frodo and Gandalf's conversation.

Yes. The ring pulls them to the Unseen. That’s why they became invisible, and also why Frodo could see the ringwraiths’ true appearance.

>now this is a story all about how
>my life got flipped, turned upside down

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IT'S BEEN A LONG DAY

WITHOUT YOU MY FRIEND

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A commoner wouldn't receive anything but the invisibility power, which really just makes you visible to Sauron and his minions.

Any further powers would require someone with serious magic abilities like Gandalf or Galadriel.

The absolute quality of Faramir, Captain of Gondor

holy shit

t. Denethor

Elves go super saiyan.

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Do you think Denethor inspected his sons' penises?

go back

DOWN DOWN TO GOBLIN TOWN
DOWN DOWN TO GOBLIN TOWN

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>Faramir and Eowyn get to live the a rich life in peacetime Middle Earth with no responsibilities
Absolutely based

LORD OF ALL NOLDOR

You just know

He was head of the Gondorian Bureau of Weights and Measures, and thus in possession of the official ruler of Gondor by which all other rulers are defined.

He did 'help'. Once.

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we will never get a full white cast like this in a fantasy movie. fuck the world

Iluvatar didn’t sink Beleriand, that was the army of the Valar.
You’re thinking of Numenor.

BOROMIR WAS LOYAL TO MORDOR!
NOT SOME WIZAWIZAWIZ WIZAWIZAWIZ WIZAWIZAWIZ WIZAWIZAWIZ

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(Up in da club)
Where you chillin' for the summer, homie?
(Up in da club)
Jumpin' out the stretch Hummer runnin'
(Up in da club)
Fly ladies from wall to wall
(Up in da club)
With my beats I'm fadin' all-a y'all
(Up in da club)
Can a playa spend his double life
(Up in da club)
Before she shank me with a butter knife
(Up in da club)
Upper level or a lower life
(Up in da club)
Still the same be where we go inside

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Finally a chance for Faramir, Captain of Gondor, to show his quality.

So how is amazons pre production coming along? Are they really going to cover silmarillion? I cant see how they would pull it off

Second Age only.

But how will they do it? Personally i think lots of short storys (3 episode arcs) would be the best.

No one's seen it.

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The universe was literally sung into existence. It's like he's praying, a new beginning for mens realm.

Dude was raised by elves wtf do you expect?

Eru fucked Numenor up when those fags were getting uppity because Sauron was mindgaming them so hard, the Valar are responsible for Beleriand

That could work for first age stuff like Beren and Luthien, or Turin Turambar, but not for the second age stories. The forging of the Rings of Power wouldn’t fit in three episodes, for example.

>MENNED

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>pure accident
Illuvatar created the universe that way

Jews watered down his beliefs hard, which were the major driving factor behind his stories anyways

>be tolkien
>explicitly state that dunedain lifespan isn't determined by parentage but rather faithfulness to god
>Rangers lose more and more of their lifespan every single generation anyway
What did he mean by this? No seriously what the fuck? The Rangers exist solely as an act of repentance for the infighting that broke up Arnor.

>inauguration

Americans. Also that scene is 100% kino

They help frodo get out of the shire to rivendell
Merry stabbing the witch king is the only reason eowyn could kill him
Pippin killed a troll and saved faramir's life

DAAAAAYHOOOOOO
MEEEE SAAA DAY ME SAAA DAY ME SAAA DAY

why didn't elrond just push the "No" guy into the lavar

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No one can destroy the ring, Elrond would have taken it.

>Merry and Pippin didn't do anything
Did you miss the part where they got the Ents to take Isengard in one fell swoop and imprison Saruman in Orthanc? Did you miss the part where Merry caused the death of the Witch King and turned the battle of Pelenor fields in their favor? Did you miss Pippin's Absolute kino sing song? Did you even watch the films?

Are you hinting at what Aragorns tax policy might be like?

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>carries the burden of the Ring the entire way to the place where it is to be destroyed
>is effected by the Ring permanently to show how heavy a burden it is (supposed to represent PTSD)
>"hurr frodo is dumb duuude"

read the first phrase and knew it was an instant hit

CA-LI-FORNIA GURLS
WE'RE UNFORGETTABLE

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His beliefs only became the major factor late in his life, when he became more preoccupied with the metaphysical and philosophical concerns. Early on it was poetry and language the main driving forces of his writing process.

It was living close to aman I thought

Its not supposed to represent PTSD, its supposed to show that there is a limit to the personal will. Frodo did all he could do, and in his failure the good deed of Bilbo (sparing Gollum) took over.

>Extended cut is terrible
imagine being this retarded

Why are the commentaries on this so comfy.
Pippin and Merry's commentary on any scene is prime snug

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*fortunate son starts playing*
THE EAGLES ARE COMING

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what?
I'm talking about Frodo still being damaged after everything is over and going to the Grey Havens at the end

Nope. That's actually closer to the heresy Sauron wanted them to believe than the actual situation.
The Dunedain live longer if they have a Buddhist-esque detachment from their own mortality. The more "elf like", as Chris puts this, they are the longer they end up living.

What is he contemplating, Yea Forums?

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whether it's more cucked to have a daughter that will be ravished by other men or to have a son that will ravish women you could be ravishing

SAY YOUR PRAYERS LITTLE ONE
DON'T FORGET MY SON
TO INCLUDE EVERYONE

If abortion shouldn't be allowed because it's immoral or if it should be allowed because it means there will be less poorly-raised retards roaming the earth

What about a son that thinks he's a girl

>IT AIN’T ME
>IT AIN’T ME
>I AIN’T NO DUNEDAIN SON

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TELL ME ABOUT FRODO, WHY DOES HE WEAR THE RING???

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LOTTA LOYALTY FOR A MORGUL SELLSWORD

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TELL ME ABOUT TURIN, WHY DOES HE WEAR THE DWARF MASK OF BELEGOST?

filthy hobbitses took the precious from us

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Childhood is seeing Aragorn as the hero.
Adulthood is realizing the orcs did nothing wrong.

IF I TAKE OFF THAT RING WILL YOU DIE?

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>”They were sent by the helmed man...”
>”Sauron?”
>”No.”

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Childhood is idolising maggoty bread.
Adulthood is realizing meat’s back on the menu.

WW1 and languages played a much larger role than religious beliefs.

toktoktoktoktoktok

It would be extremely painful

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ABANDON THIS THREAD

FLEE FLEE FOR YOUR LIVES

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Singing during inauguration made it a artistic event he could write off as deductible

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>”My friends... you bow to no one.”

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>inauguration

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Why did everyone call him Stewart when that wasn't his name?

>"you bow to no one"
>At the request of Democrats

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formerly part of sneed

the Stewart of Gondor is a title bestowed upon the father who has been blowing his eldest son the most

Why did they make him look all gayed up for this scene?

so the elf audience can relate
FUCK ELVES

>WITH ARMS WIDE OPEN

*ahem*
Fuck Morgoth
Fuck Valar
Fuck Teleri fucking shits

Wtf, but why?

>explicitly state that dunedain lifespan isn't determined by parentage but rather faithfulness to god

Where was that stated? I always thought it was because their lineage was descended from the Numenoreans (of which the noble line descended through Elros had elvish blood giving them further life extension)

>>*starts singing*

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GARD GAGAGAGARD