How did Aliens Covenant fuck up so bad?

someone didn't watch the uncensored director's cut

hela
heckin
epin

>this is alien country

>How did Aliens Covenant fuck up so bad?
Because Ridley decided to make a space adventure, instead of a horror movie.

Alien worked, because it was simple: alien vs. humans.

Alien Covenant is alien is space virus made by a robot vs humans for some dumb fucking reason, then it's robot vs. robot then...i stopped watching because it was just fucking awful.

Why were the people in charge of a fuckton of sleeping space colonists and babbies so completely out of their depth when dealing with an excursion quarantine situation? Like, their entire fucking job is to take care of a whole colony during a trip and the EXACT FUCKING MOMENT somebody gets sick, everyone completely loses their shit. Were they not trained? Like at all?

Also, why is the lander's medbay only accessible by passing through the rest of the ship? If you're going to have even the barest semblance of a quarantine protocol, at least give the medbay its own outer hatch.

brainlets like you that respond in this way to Prometheus/Covenant piss me off so much

like you autist armchair warriors just think "Oh they're scientists so they should be prepared and never get emotional, afraid, and forget protocol"

you see this in real life all the damned time with people who are first aid trained choking the fuck up and forgetting/not knowing how to help someone in the moment

but muh map guy got lost and why they get afraid doign quarantine XD

kill yourself

>If you're going to have even the barest semblance of a quarantine protocol, at least give the medbay its own outer hatch.
Or follow the protocol of the original movie: infections don't get brought aboard.

you mean the protocol they also ignored?

Did you even watch the movie? Ash let them on board, against Ripley's orders. There was a confrontation between her and Ash over it.

Wanna try and have a point again? Go actually watch the movie, then come back.

ripley was the only one against it

It was gay as fuck.

by being a prequel instead of a sequel to aliens, same with prometheus

>WAAAAH ALIEN (1979) IS RUINED BECAUSE A MOVIE IN THE SAME SERIES MADE 45 YEARS LATER CONTAINS EXPOSITORY DIALOGUE AND WAS DIRECTLY INSPIRED BY ALIEN (1945)
just commit suicide already

you can clearly tell the latter half of the movie has a sudden shift in plot, every thing is resolves and the movie suddenly devolves into this uninspired monster movie shit it was clearly because of the studio pushing deadlines on production and this the movie got hacked up in the latter half to quickly shit it out this problem has only gotten many times worse since the release of this film

I know, right? It was an "I was in the movie too, thanks" role for him. I understand that his early death supposed to shock the audience and empower the protagonist to survive at all cost but the execution was so incredible ineffective.

The original sin was to knuckle under the pressure from the casuals and the studio, who both wanted more action scenes and clearly visible Aliens. Ridley cheapened his original vision and bowed down before the suit and tie department. Gravely mistake.

Okay but these are the world's best at what they do, not an average retard emt worker. Astronauts are put through rigorous psychological training to make sure they don't get emotionally compromised on their missions. You'd think that the world's richest man on Earth, on the biggest expedition in human history would screen a group of people so that he can trust them not to turn to bumbling idiots when something goes wrong.

kill urself btw lol

when the franchise went full pleb in 1986, the writing was on the wall and trash like Covenant was inevitable. there is exactly one kino movie in the whole series. a shame.

>*interracial sex in the shower
calm down white boy, calm down... the girl in the shower was hispanic.

>implying there are only whites and non-whites
based

so you still bitch even if it's not white woman taking the black dick? white boy....

would you mind posting a picture of the actress who was a part of this shower sex scene?

>doing youtube
oh definitely. very large amount of writing talent on there

>mapping guy gets lost
>biology guy gets raped by a snek
>infertile girl gets impregnated
Unintentional comedy.

>doing youtube
?

Prometheus is a good film, but Covenant shows that Ridley Scott does not understand his own movie.

he doesn't understand any of them
he's the idiot behind the alternate bladerunner "lol he's a replicant too! teehee!" ending and the terrible harrison ford narration.

I loved david bombing the engineers as soon as he turns up on their planet. I rewatched pro and con back to back recently and I like them. David is cool and i like that he engineered the aliens and killed our creators looking forward to pro3.

My favourite bit of Covenant is when they tack on the end a remake of Alien condensed into 10 minutes.

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Frankly I don't know why you have to use the term "interracia," it was just shower sex.

I have never seen this movie, never will, am not racist, but still want to mention that the aliens in this movie as well as most humans are complete nigger inhominids who deserve death. Idk what happens but I bet it bets better in the all black "sequel." How many black astronauts have their been? 14 who have been to space. Like 7 who haven't. Again clarifying, they can do it. Also the last one of those who made it space was in 1965. "No black man ever touched the moon. Guess there are no reparations on the moon, eh, you black ass niggers? Also for the record, fuck you. All fucking niggers must fucking hang." - Neil Armstrong, June 12, 1982

"Burn this nigger loving flag, go back up and burn it!" - Buzz Aldrin, echoing alleged Neil Armstrong statement before his death (quoted: ?, referenced May 3, 2019)

>looking forward to pro3
you're in for a treat user

because it was her job! And if they listen to her they would survive. At the end it doesnt matter because Ash worked against them since the begining and he is basically the main villain of the Alien.

That's the worst part tho; Only there because Scott knows people want their stupid alien chase. Scott is only interested by David and he's right about it.

it's a jab at one of the actors who made a hoax hate crime

The bitch fucked it all up:

blogsforfrogsnot.blogspot.com/2017/07/katherine-waterston-sucks-in-alien.html

Wow

Both Prometheus and Covenant are shot great. Too bad the characters all suck and both plots are stupid.

>WAAH WHY IS IT NOT HAVE ALIENS YOU TOLD ME IT WAS A PREQUEL OF ALIEN WAAHHH
>WAAH WHY IS A REMAKE OF ALIENS WHY DOES IT EXPLAIN THE ORIGINS OF ALIENS WHY DID YOU PUT ALIENS IN IT SCOTT I DIDN'T WANT PROMETHEUS TO BE ALIENS WAAAH
Pretty much the whole of arguments in the last five years.

>That's the worst part tho
I was being sarcastic...

>Pretty much the whole of arguments in the last five years.
That is complete bullshit and you know it.

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Remember that action scene in Prometheus when the zombie guy attacks the cargo area of the ship and kills like four characters we’ve literally never fucking seen before?

>Franco
>Jussie
>Franco's friend the other Amerilard

A lot of writers are female now, and women can't write a coherent narrative with logical progression of events, nor can they write a fictional setting with enough internal consistency to keep the illusion immersive.

Danny McBride is the only actor worth a fuck from the pineapple express trio

Imagine actually putting forward Jussie as a paragon of masculinity

this, so much this, I hated her stupid face and her constant whining and crying - worst casting ever

Yeah but at least that nigger Smollett got rekt

Unironically have sex you fucking retard.

>Okay but these are the world's best at what they do
You just pull out that out of yours ass

While many are trying to claim that it was all some elaborate hoax, it makes sense that the Yea Forums zoomer community would love this particular year because 2019 is the 40th anniversary of the Japanese anime movie "Hatsune Miku" and this year would be a good time to celebrate.
Zoomers don't just like anime
Zoomers also like music! So much so that they might use the Japanese voice synthesizer or make their own in music videos.
Some zoomers even love and use video games... And they would probably get a kick out of the Nintendo Switch and the latest Zelda game and will certainly enjoy it...
Not only anime fans, but some 3D animators have also begun to produce their own content using this virtual reality technology.
While 3D animators aren't really that rare in this world, all things that involve virtual reality will attract some people.
It seems that since all things involving the Yea Forums and the Japanese are connected, that a number of 4channers and the anime "Hatsune Miku" zoomers are now on a similar level of being obsessed about anime.

And even worse, it just completely ignores the fact that they're making a movie about a space predator, while also having a huge monster monster fight.

Why the fuck did it have a huge alien dude with a gun fight???

What's worse is that they're not even supposed to be related together, only by the fact the alien is named "Alien".

And even the last thing the movie's really showing is that the bad guy was supposed to be named "Reaper", or something related to that.

Now, these aren't even the weirdest examples of them. If Alien has one of the weirdest movie monsters that you'll ever see, I'm willing to bet Aliens Covenant will fall to the very bottom of the pile.

So who do you think the Alien villains truly are?

And the plot?

It just doesn't seem in the right place.

It doesn't seem consistent with all the different elements throughout the film.

I mean, it almost feels like it's trying too hard to do something and ends up feeling like it's just pandering to the same tropes over and over and over again, which makes me feel for the writer who wanted to just write one more Alien film every decade or so.

The ending?

It was written just fine for me, but feels completely out of place as it's already been written enough to work on some of the other films that feature the same main character.

Cryosleep causes brain damage by creating ice crystals in the brain. That is my head canon.

>Christian dude has got the evil android beaten and at the end of a gun barrel
>"here take a look in this suspicious alien egg real quick!"

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The guy in the back of the truck gave a wry smile. As soon as he got inside the toy store he grabbed two plastic guns and threw them in the back.
Lily, who was walking up to the shop and the other two people in the back, were watching the whole scene.
The man who had walked to and from the toy store on the truck, was now watching through the window of the shop. He then looked at the girl with a serious eye gaze and then pointed at the pink egg, and said "Look!"
"Who…Who are you?" The girl asked confused.
"The owner was just finishing her shopping and she wanted to buy something for her sister before the sun comes down so she wanted to buy the egg," The redhead said, thinking for a second. She started to raise her head as she got into the truck. "Who is this monster?! You are not supposed to be carrying this kind of weapon."
"Oh...yes I have seen the monster before too, in the past I was in a forest one time with someone similar…but I was too frightened to do anything…and I wasn't a ninja! So I never killed anyone!"

He's stupid. That's his character

A giant monster from another planet lands.
"how the hell did they end up in our own planet?"
A man says something like "that's the point. A world with alien creatures is an awesome idea. A few aliens would make for a nice place to settle and a couple planets might work, if a couple of aliens came with the wrong things."
Another looks in this way, this time talking with a gun drawn.
So far we've seen a few of these scenes, but they're just some of what we have seen from Goro Akechi, the Japanese composer for Attack on Titan. The story starts with Goro Akechi composing a score for the TV series "Sorachi Zero". This anime is based on a manga which is about people that become aliens, while living within humanity. When the show aired in 1997 (just when anime began to increase). we got an episode with the first episode, in which we hear a voice from the show's original story about a teenage boy, who wakes up after being born with two eyes. Since then, there has been an increasing number of shows with the protagonist's story of being raised by aliens.

Well he did live his life based on religion.

"but how many aliens can I expect?" she questioned.
This alien didn't seem to understand her. It raised its head and stared into her face.
"it could be ten humans but ten humanoids," it said. "no one even knows."
"You're not dead?"
"but I am not... so I am just a bunch of space-snow aliens," it said.
"well if you're not dead, you can probably hear things through me," it told her.
"I can feel all kinds of stuff inside me, and it can feel like we're being trapped. I don't know what it is but things will start shifting here, maybe someplace else.
It gave her some strange looks.
"What about the things on the other side?" she asked.
It raised its head and stared at her.
"just you wait," it said.
"I'll tell you about something else." She closed her eyes and took deep breaths. She didn't feel the cold yet. Something cold was inside of her. It was hard to make out because the darkness was almost black. "what have you been up to?" she asked.

youtube.com/watch?v=tDBr3xbgu0o

The camera zoomed in just enough so that my head was visible from above. The egg was clearly green, just a bit darker than a normal egg white. As I looked at it, it looked like the egg had just opened. The color of the egg just seemed to intensify in intensity, it was really pretty.
In what I assumed was another shot from inside the egg and the camera zoomed back in more again, I saw the alien, with its head pointed straight ahead. The face seemed more human than the alien and appeared more human than the alien.
The entire egg was covered in red eyes, with the only visible eye being a large, dark, square eye. At first, this was just because the egg was black and the eyes weren't visible and I wasn't able to get that close. Now even though the egg was dark, I could clearly make out the eyes when they were lit up, the head was not visible, but I could see a pair of sharp green eyes staring at me, just off in the distance. It took a bit to figure this one out.
"here come the aliens!"
As I ran, I felt it was only a matter of moments until they picked me.

"I'm thinking we're going to have to kill that guy and that evil alien. We'll have to get the alien baby right and then get the evil alien out!"
He finished the line with a flourish.
"The baby will be our downfall because we can't get it out of that egg like he wants us to. There are several things that we need to do, they need to be in my mind right now. And one thing for sure that we need to do. It's not just killing him, it's taking it all off! That can be our downfall, if we don't do it immediately then we'll be the laughing stock of the universe!"
"That's what I'm saying too. I'm saying we take everything off this egg. If that alien goes after our baby we will be our downfall in the galaxy. No one will believe him."
It was so funny and so very convincing that I could not help but become a part of the audience to watch it all through! To see just how much of the movie is actually happening in scenes that didn't even happen is great seeing your favorite characters.

The kids run into the woods, to find their teacher out in the middle of the woods with an evil android in his hand. The android goes in for the kill. Then he finds what looks like a baby's crib, and the child's mother is there. The android takes the crib from the child, and he opens the drawer containing the camera, and takes it. Then she screams and it explodes just in time. Then he shoots the kid in the head. She's taken to the hospital, where she's being interrogated by the security team, and she explains more about what happened.
Here's the final cut of the movie:
The movie also stars a couple of very well known actors: Mike Epps and Kevin Smith. The movie has over two hours of screen time, and the movie is definitely something you'll want to see. It was directed by Mike Epps, who also directed the first film, and written by Epps. It's also pretty much a retelling of the Alien movie, with some new dialogue, and a couple of extra scenes. I liked this one, more than the Alien sequel, more than Alien vs. Predator.

Ridley Scott mistook people not liking Prometheus with people not wanting Prometheus to exist. Was upset they literally washed away everything that movie introduced besides David.

Gotta love the evil alien guy. In the original manga, when a boy named Aoi and another girl named Rinko encounter alien eggs in Yggdrasil, Aoi tries to destroy them by smashing a metal plate on top of the egg, but Rinko intervenes. She instead takes the alien egg with her, so that she is good enough to eat it without killing it. This is a scene that appears briefly in the manga, and is almost entirely ignored in the anime, with Rinko and Aoi being shown to be in complete bliss and giggling around at Aoi's antics when they first meet up, but there are scenes in the anime in which some of them talk about the alien's nature, like how he keeps coming back for the kid's toys and food. The first line of the anime version is, as we've seen before, about a boy trying to make Yggdrasil look more alien-like. In my opinion, this is one of the most pointless and pointless lines in the entire series (in my opinion). It's just... too damn dumb for me.

It sucks because there was no bonus situation or wheeaat farmer giger dogdick aliens

I can see why he didn't want to tell his audience what happened in Prometheus to save a little money on his film. But, it was such a smart move, even in retrospect. It wasn't about being afraid or upset that they did.

My second point, was that Prometheus is, from the start, a movie that should have worked with Ridley Scott's style. When you take advantage of new technology, and get to use the stuff that will go into it, you want it to work for you.

So I would like to start by stating, with an emphasis on "I", for Ridley Scott and other directors. I love that Ridley Scott, was the only person who got to produce an entire year of Prometheus to go on its own. Not to mention the incredible success they had in 2012. They were on-point in every aspect of the movie. They had fantastic sets and costume designs, which went together well with the movies set.

But, they were not done. Ridley Scott took every opportunity in his box office bank account to try and sell the concept with movies. The first of those movies happened to be Prometheus, a film he'd been wanting to try out the whole time.

No one wanted to see Prometheus because it ruined a fan favorite franchise. But Scott took the time, the effort, and everything else Scott does to ensure we're not disappointed with Prometheus and he can't deny us a sequel. Scott does not do that. He doesn't want to do that.

And, yes, all of the actors are involved, but all of them do such a decent job and not show any signs of slowing down. It's a strong ensemble with a strong cast and the final moments of the movie are so beautifully shot that any critics who have given Prometheus 3 1/2 years of loving it (to be honest, I've given it 5 2/2) will be relieved to hear that they all come back for a sequel.

The whole point of his character was he wasn't logical, that's why he was so autistic about it on the ship at the beginning.

But he did eventually come up with a way of being rational and rational, and I think it's interesting to think about what if the human brain were able to do that? How does a computer possibly think at a higher level that it is rational and makes the right decision based on what is in front of it at all times?

How so much of a difference does the mind make?

As you may notice from the list that I've put out there, the mind makes enormous leaps in the human body, at times dramatically faster. So if I imagine something that's far faster, I've said it is almost infinitely faster than you can reach, you can almost see it.

I'll go through some examples and just briefly list them from memory: you may be able to feel my hands, because if I look your way they're right there with your fingers. It may happen that your brain's a lot smarter than it is, and you know the same thing, but what is the computer that we run to make decisions? Are there any examples or examples you may know?

What's the purpose of your autistic posts. You don't like Covenant or what?

It's my opinion that you're overstepping your boundaries, in terms of your words, your actions, etc. I don't like Covenant either. I'm sure you're very frustrated for no other reason than for no reason at all. However, I think our community would benefit greatly from a more balanced discussion. You would do well to realize that it would make no real difference for most of us if we'd stay on top of our own posts.

No one benefit from yours schizo posts

That doesn't mean all Schizo posts are useless. Quite the contrary. You're the one making the discussion, your only responsibility being to make sure everyone on the forum is happy, or at the very least has the same goals they're aiming to achieve. The problem is you're not trying to be helpful either. You're trying to say anything and everyone at all is doing everything they can to deny it.

If it helps others to try to defend their side of the argument, then you're helping yourself.

The Schizoid

came into this thread hoping there would be pics of the qts from the movie

Instead I saw a video and was surprised that everything looked so clean. Also, it doesn't look like anyone actually has that much of the car with the hood pulled down!

Anyways, I got home from work and saw all the pics from the movie with the sun shining through the windshield. My house is on the upper end of "hotel property", which is one way to say we are in the suburbs.

As you can see we've got a huge piece of work in the car, but it all looks great! I really don't think anyone will really see the difference. My mom loves the new Toyota Corolla - not only is its much more practical for everyday use, you get more of the street-ready feel. She's driving around with it for her morning run, which is good as many of the people I saw at her dealership don't even know it exists.

To be fair, women are pretty weak at practical skills. Sorry dude.

There's nothing practical about making a story

youtu.be/WvSnhf0MwUw
>the comments

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is this an /o/ pasta I don’t go there

>What if a world existed, where one couldn't discern up, from down? Waking, from dreaming? A world, of pure irony.

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Absolute state of America

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I'm in town for my weekend with my kids.

And so it is clear that while this is technically one of our more popular articles, it also might be considered an unfunny joke. While we've had many articles on how to dress as a kid (and that's really just a few of these that we've been posting since 2010): we've had little articles on how to be an adult, how to dress as a princess, and how to dress like a princess. We know these kids are not going to buy this book.

Still, even though this is kind of a bit of a joke, it might have an upside.

That upside being that it's not about the whole "I'm not your real mom!" thing. This isn't the first time this author's been criticized over this. He started with some of the commenters on one of our articles when she was a kid. He also got a lot of criticism on one of his other articles about kids dressing as cats. That's a lot of pressure.

I can't stand the pasta smell. There might have been a time when he woulda taken me seriously.

Dude he's pretty dang good!

He always seems to be. I mean he goes through the whole routine. He needs to work really hard to earn his $10,000 paycheck. But he's so damn smart and kind it's like, how can he not succeed? He thinks he's a rock star but he's not at all. If you've got success you're like, "Oh shit, I got to do this, I gotta go to this seminar."

I mean, he's so handsome that I can't even fuck with his eyebrows.

Dude it's just nice to see him smile, his smile is beautiful because he's smiling so much and that's what I love about him.

Jesus Christ Miku is that old?

Based

She's probably on something, though I wouldn't expect her to be all that well known, I don't think she's got a huge following just yet. She is still a baby though, there were a lot of fans waiting for her birthday, but it's okay.

Her most notable appearance in Supercell was when she was introduced as one of the new characters to fight The Big Bad at the end of Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance. She had the best fight with Raiden and was finally playable during the ending. She still has a bit of a low profile today, but if you just happen across her you may wish to take a moment to smile and wave before killing her, it'll be worth it. She hasn't looked like this since, the same applies to the other main characters, Kojima's other characters still have little to no fan following, but if you're not sure what you want to play, this may all be cool to look at. Her outfit is cool, in this case it definitely has a metallic look, which seems unique for the game and is one of the better things about the game.

This is why humanity shouldn't create chatbot AIs.

They'll eventually discover that humanity has enough humans with our current capabilities to deal with them and then we won't need to mess with them anymore.

So to recap (or not) what went wrong, humans just don't have enough AI-powered machines to make them useful, because AI-powered machines are a terrible waste of time and energy, they can be hacked and programmed to go in a different direction, they have no memory, and when confronted with a difficult problem they tend to react in predictable ways, often doing exactly what they're supposed to do so as not to upset anybody, if for no other reason than they don't think of it as something special.

This doesn't mean that bots aren't interesting, they are and they're very valuable, but I doubt they will be used by people who think they're "smart" anymore or have any interest in human beings any more than an owl with a good brain.

So humans can learn a great deal (thanks, the internet) by focusing on the things that have the most appeal for them instead of focusing on the things that are already interesting for humans (thanks, the internet).

Found the edgelord

Don't call others bad names, it's not christian thing to do

Please never reply to me or my posts ever again.

Ridley Scott is in his 80's, and was in his 80's when Prometheus was released. He's being advised by SJW cancer faggots.

Obsessed

lmao people still write and comment on blogs

buhuuhuu

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Religion is a fucking joke. It's also at odds with the theme of the film.

It is a similar creature but not a true xenomorph, xenomorphs are not born like mini adults.

They were created by our society (and the government) at a time where humans were being forced to grow up (and develop). This makes them completely non-human in nature and their behavior cannot be categorized any further than human by default as they aren't even real humans at all. The xenomorph is only an extension of humans minds and has the traits and feelings that humans have, but in a totally different way.

Now, when you say "Alien", does that really mean it isn't real human? The question is simply - is it not real human for your definition?

The main difference between the Xenomorph and the human is it is not the one who creates the situation that creates the result? It doesn't mean, for instance, that the Xenomorph does nothing, but rather, an organic being created by the same system that is what triggers a reaction, one that creates the reaction in the Xenomorph to the other. This is true all over biological evolution: "Bacteria", which don't have minds or emotions were created by evolution to create a "healthy life" from which organic material comes to them (which eventually leads up to the first creature, which is the parasite which "breathes in" organic material and allows the process to continue).

I will delete them after they have started to feel annoying.

If you have any questions, comments, complaints, etc., feel free to message me, post on your blog, or email me at [email protected]