AHHHHH!!!! HOW COME THIS CAN ONLY HAPPEN TO ME AND NOT THE FEMALE PROTAGONIST AHH!!!

But Rey is so heroic! She saved... uh...
Has she ever saved anyone?

>no way to romance Satele
Explain this

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She saved Leia, Poe, Finn, Rose, and whatever twelve Resistance officers that survived by moving the rocks that blocked their path.

Darth Maul lost his legs. You don't go Super Sayian in Star Wars until you lose a limb

She's not supposed to save anybody. This is a story about her personal growth or something.

how come rey doesnt get hurt or have trouble with the bad guys? luke was basically barely scraping by

AAAHHHHH TONY HELP ME!!!!!

She’s saved me the money that tickets to the last two Star Wars movies would’ve cost

Luke was a hick farmboy and Rey was an orphan that had to scrape by on her own ever since she was seven. Not to say some things are too easy for her but I’m not surprised she’s capable of defending herself.

Kids cannot learn to defend themselves on their own.

>I grew up with 0 brothers

so she was a prostitute? got it

Luke.. I need you to go back to My Tatooine hut and get rid of my porn collection... holograms, holocrons, some datadisc I bought on the Coruscant black market... There are snuff films in there, Luke. If the Rebellion sees all the pictures I took of Twileks feet while they were sleeping... It's all in the box in the basement labelled "Bothan Pictures".. Before you ask: yes, there are bothan pictures in there, they're just not of Death Star data.. You've gotta do this for me, Luke. You've got to destroy my porn stash.. And I mean DESTROY that shit, kid... Seriously, the holocrons alone are enough to get a man put away on an Emperial penitentiary planet. Grruagrarr is the Wookie word for "pervert", son, and that's what I am... That's what your Uncle Ben is.. All the fat globs of semen I've wasted masturbating to Rancor beastiality and vore over the years.. And I'm a strong ejaculator, Luke... I'm as sterile as a surgery room, but I cum like a geyser every time... I think part of the thrill was always seeing if I could get any of it in my mouth... The first time I did it was a complete accident, but the taste, Luke.. The taste was unlike anything I had ever experienced before... I started to crave it... It was like a drug to me... And that's coming from a guy who did a lot of death sticks on Corellia... Usually off of the ass-cheeks of some Force controled Tusken Raiders who me and Qui-Gon would kill for sport later... I actually have some footage of that in my holocron collection... Which, again, you REALLY need to get rid of... I cannot overstate the importance of wiping that shit from the face of the Galaxy.. Okay, what else, what else? Oh, you can have the slice of Meiloorun Fruit from Aunt Beru’s birthday that I've been saving.. I mean, I took a bite out of it, but it's not like I have herpes or anything... Wait.. Do genitals count? Never mind, I'm dead now.. In summation: May the Force be with you.. oh, yea. Vader is your father. You’re a good friend, Luke.

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>Luke is a real hero
yeah, no

i wish obi one canopy would smell my feet

literal who's nobody will remember in 5 years

I agree, who the fuck is Leia?

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NOOO WHY'D YOU SLICE OF MY HAND

It's imperative that you understand.
Obi-wan could never bother
To tell the truth about your father.

>There is no alternative for women
WHAT IS A VIBRATOR?

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>he has at least one of his hands
Lucky

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>However it's worth noting Finn also suffers an exshtremely painful crippling injury from a lightsaber
And he just walks it off in the next scene

did you watch the movie?

What you're saying is that she should have received some form of Sith Genital Mutilation.

It is actually the biggest flaw among feminist writers. They simply won't make women go through anything, because in their ideology-addled mind, being a woman is suffering enough. They won't make women suffer to improve themselves. They won't let them get their ass kicked (which is the big reason they consistently write Mary Sues).

HOW COULD YOU GIVE YOUR OWN SON THE SPICY LIGHTSABER VADER?!

She was an orphan we literally never saw undergo hardship. Even her scavenging was more like an adventure than genuine work.

I remember I watched the original movies for the first time after watching Clones and I couldn’t stop keking at how Anakin just has a light grunt when he loses his arm and Luke screams like he just got castrated when he loses his hand.

To Clones' credit, the pain doesn't happen immediately. Sudden shock and unconsciousness would be more realistic than the scream.

The heat of plasma would also kill the nerves very quickly.

The lightsaber is a symbolic penis so you could say that Luke did get castrated there.. by his own father.

>They simply won't make women go through anything, because in their ideology-addled mind, being a woman is suffering enough.
What if men write a female character?

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He's jewish?

Yes and in the last Jedi which takes very shortly after the end of force awakens he’s totally fine. Even got that jacket sewn up good as new!

Sometimes it's better, sometimes it's worse.
But the best female characters are written either by honest women without that chip on their shoulder, or men who are sympathetic but don't lie to themselves about women (or they write angels or devils, depending on their view).
A woman can be a good, or total shit, but you have to make them real. Treya is a little different because she's a Jedi master. None of them are realistic people, but she probably comes the closest.

Then anything bad that happens to her is some kind of male power fantasy and anything good that happens to her is pandering.

I miss her

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>OW! WHY'D YOU CUT OFF MY HAND?!
>it is imperative that you understand
>Obi-wan could never bother
>telling you about your father
>HE TOLD ME ENOUGH
>HE TOLD ME YOU KILLED HIM
>then there's something I must reveal then

>Hamill on a horse
>beats the return of Luke Skywalker

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Fuck Kreia

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HE TOLD ME ENOUGH
HE TOLD ME YOU KILLED HIM

This, but Rey in her place :3

>Twileks feet
I didn't even know that I had this fetish until just now

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Broke my right arm and i can tell you, it didnt take that long to switch to my left. I actually use it predominantly now, since i can use the right for the mouse

What personal growth? She goes from a capable, independent badass who don't need no man to a capable, independent badass who can move rocks.

Luke started out as a loser who didn't know anything about the outside world and ended up as a noble warrior who learned philosophy and tai-chi from a midget in a swamp. Now that's personal growth.

IT'S NOT THE EAST NOR THE WEST SIDE

That tummy leads only to the dark side.

>Luke and Anakin both faced experienced jedi masters
>Rey only faced a retarded padawan

Most female characters in big movies are written by men who are being advised by women, which is just the lamest way to do it. Why write a good female character with real development when you can organize a board meeting and come up with a bunch of strict guidelines so JJ Abrams can write a boring female lead that sells action figures to expanding demographics?

I'M YO FATHER
(i'm yo father)

Not any of those guys but Ben's at minimum a trained fighter who's studied under Luke and Snoke. He must have some degree of proficiency.

Echani Rituals anyone?

I still consider Leia and even Padme to be better done than Rey.

Can I do it instead? :3

Was Kreia hot when she was younger?

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(You) know what Tranny ? I'll give a reply to you this time because unlike other trannoids you bothered to make a different thread unlike your fellow subhumans reposting same shit from yesterdays raid threads.

>Rey goes beyond a Super Sayian despite keeping all her limbs

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This is such a dumb thing to say. Regardless of whatever canon bullshit is written before (after) the fact, TFA portrays Kylo throughout the movie as powerful and untamed. They make a point of showing him slaughtering people with his crew. The movie tries very hard to make him look strong. Add to that Rey being portrayed as newbish, maybe good at swinging a lightweight staff, but even that is a stretch. This is why the ending duel is nonsense written as a girl power moment. Chewie landing a shot on his rib was obviously added in later as an excuse to make that scene "work".

Damn she dummy thicc

Man I can't wait for Rey to defeat Kylo for the third time. It's going to be such an amazing payoff!

He even learned how to fly a ship in his sleep

Mark was such a cute bimbo when he was young.

100% guarantee she was a bombshell.

She's not the protagonist, so who cares?

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Actually, they are going to team up together and Kylo will defeat Palps and save the Galaxy or something.

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The challenges should scale with her power.

based retard

Tell me Yea Forums if Rey turns evil like Daenerys did how hard will the normies and roasties collectively lose their shit?

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Rey used battle meditation to beat kylo. Something only yoda tier Jedi and Sith do.

I hope there's a vocaroo of this.

10/10

Kek this is true. After TFA I already made my decicion to not buy further tickets for this.
I honestly wonder why so many people went into TLJ regardless only to be disapointed.

knock em out the box luke, knock em out

Someone should do a side by side of every story beat where luke shows his shortcomings that he must overcome while Ray just demonstrates how she is inherently good at everything she tries. Luke meeting his mentor by getting rescued from the Tuskan Raiders, while ray bypasses the compressor, luke in the cantina getting bullied when he meets han while ray beats up finn when they meet and then becomes an ace pilot with no training, luke gets his hand cut off when he first faces vader while ray can already go toe to toe with kylo, first time luke uses the lightsaber he is getting zapped in the ass by the training robot while ray already knows how to use hers, I'm sure there are more.

>Anakin just has a light grunt when he loses his arm
That was so off-putting. I couldn't understand why no one thought it deserves another take. Even Obi Wan showed more expression at being hurt in the same damn fight. And that was quite literally just a scratch in comparison.

now there's a reference

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I say it’s probably a combination of the current writers and directors not willing to do something like that to Rey for a number of reasons like it being ‘problematic’ and the higher ups in Disney also not wanting that as they likely wouldn’t see that as marketable as they want these new movies to be inoffensive and family friendly for them to appeal to the widest possible audience

I just chalked it up to Anakin being such a lightweight he passed out immediately. It wasn't until he got dark side powers that he could handle losing a couple more limbs.

Luke - Hand chopped off nearly killed multiple times
Solo - Frozen in Carbonite nearly killed multiple times, one time only surviving by shooting first
Leia - Had to wear a nice dress and shoes.

Women. Forever on recruit difficulty.

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In terms of her skills in the force I personally suspect they didn’t want to put Rey through a training arc since we already saw Luke go through one in the OT
But as you point out they handled it in a poor way as she just seems to be super prodigy whose good at everything with no training
I say they probably should have just went the Anakin route and made it that by the beginning of episode 7 she is already been sufficiently trained in the force by Luke or something like that and possibly focus on the more advanced forms of Jedi training

What did you think all that white goo on Jabba's face was?

>they didn’t want to put Rey through a training arc since we already saw Luke go through one in the OT
If so, that is retarded because TFA shouldn't exist then. It's basically ANH with a fresh coat of paint in an attempt to ease people back into the franchise. Talk about inconsistency.

based. that reminds me i should probably drstroy my brothers HDs now that hes gone who knows whats on em

>I’m not surprised she’s capable of defending herself
So every humanoid from that desert planet is abnormaly efficient in combat because they all live in the same shithole? Why did nobody conscript the whole planet of these superhero, Fremen tier warriors and burned the galaxy to the ground?

Literally every single great female character in the western literature is written by a man.

Leia got tortured on the death star and shot during the battle of endor.

I do enjoy the fact that Snoke manages to be the exact kind of Villain Nihlus was designed to ruthlessly mock

If her daughter is anything to go by, probably.

Luke was always a pussy. Even when he supposedly “got better” in Return of the Jedi, he just became a psychotic freak that was obsessed with saving daddy (even though his daddy ended up saving him from total death). I’m glad people are finally starting to trash on the character.

Out of curiosity, what are your opinions on master and commander?

There are so many things they could have done, yet they felt the need to fuck themselves by rehashing ANH for nostalgia and then proceeded to write themselves into a corner because where can they possibly take this series after showing the exact same war the OT was based on.

They totally should have shown what the galaxy was like after the OT, have Luke training a new Jedi order, Han and Leia together with a family, instead they retconed the entire plot and all the character growth from the OT.

>Rancor vore
Haha

Haven’t seen it. Do you recommend?

It's your privilege.

You might not understand it, but give it a shot.

I like to look at everything through the lens of Kylo Ren. He’s the son of a rebel leader, nephew to the last Jedi, and everyone expects him to also be a great Jedi. Thing is his uncle tried to kill him, and he had to run away from his life and join the one faction in the galaxy who wouldn’t judge him for dropping a house on Luke Skywalker.

He then spends his time trying to live up to the vision of the one family member his new allies respect: Darth Vader.

While he’s doing that, along comes some girl who BASICALLY has his life as it was supposed to be. She’s instantly accepted by his parents, is a force prodigy, and even has Vader’s original lightsaber. In their fight, she manages to win because she’s that much of a prodigy and he’s been shot by Dad’s walking carpet.

At this point, he decides to stop trying to be Vader, and turns on Snoke with the girl who just beat his ass because MAYBE they can bring peace to the Galaxy with Snoke and the resistance out of the way. But nope, wonder girl tells him to fuck off. Fine, he’ll do it himself anyway. Then Luke fucking Skywalker shows up just to taunt him, because Kylo Ren has a hard life.

>death sticks
>off of the ass-cheeks of some Force controled Tusken Raiders who me and Qui-Gon would kill for sport later...
Holy fuck hire this man immediately.

There is no way to escape her Mary Sue status anymore. 2/3 of a trilogy she was the textbook definition of one. That won't suddenly change in Episode 9.

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They also have pretty much no incentive to repair her character.
Partly because the people that hate her won’t be swayed by it since they won’t bother watching anyway, partly because the brain dead speds that enjoy new wars don’t care, and partly because they’d have to essentially make a brand new character because as it stands Rey has no fucking personality outside what the plot demands.

She actually redefined the term like no one before it. Legit accomplishment.

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If someone told me five years ago that a character would be such a Mary Sue that they’d blow Bella Swan out of the water, I’d have laughed at them.
She fits the pattern so perfectly it’s comical. They even have the token faux flaws and part where they pretend she’s in trouble, only to be saved by someone caught in her Sue aura, down to a T.

If only they had a draft made by Lucas that had her as a young Jedi with a rudimentary grasp of the force, or a draft of Luke where he shares insight that the series hadn't covered before.

Why didn't Rey or Kylo lose a hand in TLJ?

Subverted ;^)

Which is even funnier when you realize that the original "Mary Sue" was from a Star Wars fanfic. Now it's come full circle, fully formed and blissfully lacking in self awareness. We truly live in a post-ironic world.

If you think a vibrator is a proper substitute youve never been with a real man and i feel sorry for you

It was star trek you idiot

I'm pretty sure it was Star Trek, m8.
But Rey still hits every meaningful checkmark better than any Mary Sue test I've ever seen

It was a Star Trek fanfic and it was satire

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>The lightsaber is a symbolic penis

Uh...... what???

Female protagonists being depicted as fallible is problematic.

Luke walks off his missing hand too. So does Anakin. Injuries mean nothing in this universe.