Black Guy Dindu Nuffin: The Movie

You're just digging a deeper hole you fucking faggot, I wasn't referring to the niggers you dumb shit. I was referring to how gold can be remelted to become untraceable.
Also kys.

>be me
>poor black dude
>obtain 4 duffel bags full of gold bars from a bank robbery that left 6-8 people dead and 3 more missing
>melt them all down to liquid using the medieval forge i have in my back alley
>reforge them into similar shapes, now lacking serial numbers
>within 11 months find enough people willing to buy them with no questions asked
>never get caught
>rich now
>send a box of unmelted ones to a nearly crippled chick and tell her where my forge is
>play star fox with my brother in the oceanside mansion i bougfht with gold that seemingly came from nowhere and never get caught

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You wouldn't even have to do that much work.
Literally just beat on it with a hammer for a bit, and scratch around with a screwdriver and magically the numbers are gone.
Real gold is soft as fuck, you can dent it with your fingernail if you press hard enough

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"who wants to buy this massive amount of untraceable gold i have? nobody ask where it came from, and ignore that recent bank robbery news. you see, their gold had serial numbers and was traceable, my gold has no serial numbers and is untraceable. therefore, completely different gold."

Then what? Put them on the deepweb?

Gold is retardedly soft, you could ghetto it up like says or get a reinforced iron pot and soften it up a little. Or just rent out a workshop space and do it properly.

Every character in the film has a ton of connections for fencing shit, this is even established in the script.

None of you autists seem to realise that the movie is a love letter to 70s pulp, and doesn't have to be realistic.

gold has a low melting point

You Mel defenders are hilarious. This movie is shit. What a bizarre hill to die on.

You realise they can detect the source of the gold from the profile of other trace impurities right? I think the levels of these impurities are even specifically designed in such a way that it can be identified to the original owner or maker, but I could be wrong. Melting it down and removing the identifying marks won’t be enough. Also good luck unloading tonnes of gold bullion without raising some eyebrows, especially if it’s been melted down lmao

there is no way to convert it to spendable cash when it's been scratched to shit or reforged in some dumbass way that makes it obviously stolen. you could maybe unload it on a retard like yourself in a private transaction, but -someone- is getting arrested when a massive amount of stolen gold tries to re-enter the market.

You could melt a Cuban bracelet into the metal and completely fuck up that impurity profile.

>normies pretend to know how the underground market does (not) work
Epic thread!

Except the entire movie is set in a criminal underworld. They wouldn't take that shit to the nearest pawn shop, they'd take it to a fence or a gang they're affiliated with or something.

gold from a bank robbery that killed 6 people, 2 cops, and a pile of russians is so hot that nobody would touch it with a 10 foot pole. you could pass it from individual to individual until law enforcement hears that that's what's happening and nabs whoever they can catch with it, or you could hurry up and be the retard who tries to re-introduce it to the general market and get immediately caught yourself.

Well, they must have managed it because it all worked out in the end.

You could 'legally' fence the gold to pawn shops spread out over a really, really fucking huge area (talking across the country), but even then you'd have to be careful.
When that much gold is missing, the feds are gonna be going to each and every one in and around the state it was stolen from, looking for mass gold cash-ins.
You'd have to do it small, like a few hundred dollars worth at a time.
Unless you 'know a guy', it'd really be more of a pain in the ass than its worth.

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Ok Adam, now back to fucking dogs.

and THEN WHAT? you guys aren't understanding don't understand that the gold is useless to the fence because it's too hot, there's nothing they can do with it except pass it to another individual, and eventually someone is going to get caught with it. unless you're insinuating that this hood is going to have these gold bars passing from individual to individual forever without the cops ever catching wind of that, the end of the movie is retarded.

>Unless you 'know a guy'

They knew a guy, the characters were balls deep in organised crime or police corruption.

Your level of nitpicking would ruin any heist movie ever made. It's a perfectly reasonable suspension of disbelief to assume they found a way. It's not like the characters started flying in the last act of the movie, it's autistic to sperg out about an unlikely thing happening at the end of an unlikely story.

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It wouldn't ruin Inside Man proving (yet again) the Spike Lee is a genius.

>posts a brainlet wojak
>posts a thumbnail
:^)

Yeah the whole "epilogue" was wack af the first thing I thought when I saw the mansion was "how has the IRS not raped this man" they gloss over that shit hard which is pretty retarded. Still, cool Zahler movie. Enjoyed it and look forward to the next one. Closest thing to decent movies we're getting atm

>the first thing I thought when I saw the mansion was "how has the IRS not raped this man"

He fucked off to a different country.

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Baby steps.

Real? I didn't catch that. Regardless the logistics of actually getting to use that money/gold are just a nightmare and they completely ignore all that

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Hes right though, why not just came a small amount of common impurities and melt it in with the gold

>and they completely ignore all that
Ok, I will make a comedy movie about that.

Because, according to CSI, the law is completely unstoppable and can track your every fart.

>another pleb filtered
the absolute state of this board

lmao thanks craig. Srs though what's the next movie gonna be? are we ever gonna see Rattleborge?

Not this retard again

Whatever it is, I hope it has Bone Tomohawk violence and not Brawk in Cell Block 99 violence.

DAC isn’t a masterpiece but it’s telling that every bit of criticism I can found about it is nitpicking shit not being realistic even when all the shit being nit picked is easily realistic enough

>Randomly give a deranged new mother 15 minutes of screentime to make us care more about a bank robbery
>Ruthless and effective criminal trio are suddenly pants on head retarded and can't hit a guy slowly back peddling at 5 yards when he comes to pick up his dying friend
>Build up Vince as an army vet with excellent situational awareness and then have him die to an almost naked lady hiding a gun in her ass
>Have the supposedly clever and street-smart black character decide to buy a multi-million dollar mcmansion
>He also decides to put up his drug addict mother known for burning through cash at record speeds and even gives her a dedicated massage therapist

On the whole I enjoyed this movie a lot, more than Brawl and little less than Bone tomahawk, but these things really bugged me.

>Build up Vince as an army vet with excellent situational awareness and then have him die to an almost naked lady hiding a gun in her ass
This was the most retarded part of this movie. Two experienced and overly cautious cops let ‘for literally no reason released’ hostage to come close. I thought she held a grenade or something.

Where was the fucking gun? she had almost no clothes and we saw both of her hands outstretched while she crawled. And even assuming that she did manage to get up to them with the gun, are you telling me an emotionally wrecked 20 something hostage that never fired a gun before managed to pull off a clean draw and two on target shots without at least fumbling the gun a little bit?

They shoved that shit in her vagin.

>she had almost no clothes
She had her top.
>that never fired a gun before
We don't know that.
>managed to pull off a clean draw and two on target shots without at least fumbling the gun a little bit
She got point blank to Vince and still didn't kill him immediately. She did good for her state.

Are you trying to one up autism?

Neither, really. A lot of limbs exploding when shot.

Like clockwork

>you can’t point out controversial moments in movie you liked
Brainlet

Oh boy. I wonder if the bank robbery was planned to be more drawn out. Lot of implied gore re: castrated guy in the drive by shot

>drawn out
>castrated guy
We know why he was castrated.

Yeah and another lady with her hands blown to bits, just thought it was curious we didn't see more of the bank mayhem

i think the ending is just the cherry on top of a shit sundae.

there are editing problems, bad dialogue, characters becoming absolute retarded just to make the story move foward.

but the ending was 'the' most absurd.

from junkie whore mom getting massage to the amount of suspension of disbelief you gotta have to buy a scenario were that nigger, was a money laundry master.

the same guy who was just out of the prison for some shitty crime.

cmon.

I liked it, but some parts, in particular the ending, felt like subversion for the sake of it. Oh you thought this was gonna happen? Well instead THIS is gonna happen, heh, didn't see that coming did ya?

Boy what a bunch of intellectual Europeans on this board! Truly thought provoking conversation

all of sudden an ex military and a veteran cop and some european thief and his gang start to do the most stupid shit.

not even that all of sudden once they cops wanted to rob those guys using a sniper rifle, a revolver and a smoke grenade.

Great input, negro.

You can’t form a proper idea in your head if you think those moments are controversial