>What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning, the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico, but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting. I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
>Gareth: Tim, did you take me mobile? >Tim: No, Gareth, I did not take your mobile. >Tim to camera: I did take his mobile, and I put child pornography on it! hee hee
Justin Cooper
>it turns out the best snowball is not actually a snowball at all >its fear
How is dwight so kino
James Sullivan
it's so random haha
Bentley Campbell
>When I was in college I used to get wicked hammered. My nickname was puke. I would chug a fifth of soco, sneak into a frat party, polish off a few people's empties, some brewskies, some Jell-O shots, do some body shots off myself, pass out, wake up the next morning, boot, rally, more soco, head to class. Probably would have gotten expelled if I had let it affect my grades, but I aced all my courses. They called me Ace. It was totally awesome. Got straight B's. They called me Buzz.
There was a point where Andy was actually somewhat funny.
Brandon Harris
It’s not random at all. That’s why it’s so funny.
Josiah Torres
It’s not though.
Liam Sullivan
Why did they continue this series without Steve Carrell?
Zachary Brown
The office is kino comedy, if you disagree chances are you are just being a contrarian fuck
Noah Davis
Because Robert California was unironically a better character.
>sneak into a frat party, polish off a few people's empties, some brewskies, some Jell-O shots, do some body shots off myself Pure kino
Jeremiah Reyes
It was written by a British dude and based on a British series written by the same British series.
Money.
Jason Price
Sometimes, I think it's cruel giving machines a personality. My mate Petersen once bought a pair of shoes with Artificial Intelligence. 'Smart Shoes' they were called. It was a neat idea. No matter how blind drunk you were, they could always get you home. But he got rattled one night in Oslo and woke up the next morning in Burma.
You see, his shoes got bored going from his local to his flat. They wanted to see the world, you know. He had a hell of a job getting rid of them. No matter who he sold them to, they'd show up again the next day. He tried to shut them out, but they just kicked the door down.
The last thing I heard, they sort of... robbed a car and drove it into a canal. They couldn't steer, you see..Petersen was really, really blown away about it. He went to see a priest. The priest told him... he said it was alright and all that, when shoes are happy that they'd get into heaven.
Literally any scene from the original Office, or The Thick of It
Chase Miller
I kind of want to watch the office but i fear it wont be as good as german version of the office (Stromberg)
Evan Anderson
>Get to Berlin. The chandeleir isn't there. >Tiffany is. She corners me, forces me to accept a wedding. >I ask her how she knew where to find me. >She looks me in the eye. >"Jim Halpert told me." >Get back to America. >Jim is waiting for me at work. >Chandelier is hanging over his desk. >MICHAEL!
If you don't understand something, call it "random". This ensures that the other posters will view you as "one of the anons" and you won't risk any karma loss!
