It will keel

>that weeb who wanted to make superior Japanese blades and got BTFO in round one

>the viking larper who made a chunk of metal amd tried to pass it off as a template.

>the Asian kid who didn’t forge anything just ground down a lawn mower blade and handed it in

>its a morbidly obese man overheats 20 minutes into the first round episode

Those are the best ones tbqh

>it's another 'contestant doesn't follow the length requirement instructions, and gets immediately disqualified' episode

This show is a lot more entertaining than it seems

>In the city of Cohoes, New York near Albany, a man, inspired by the series, tried to forge a piece of metal over a fire in a barrel near his home. He caused a fire that destroyed three residential buildings and damaged 28 others

Man, what the fuck was that? How did that guy not notice he made a silly putty claymore? And Erin was robbed, his blade was soft, but it was the sharpest and more beautiful than the rest

Durability is important too user

Is that why they have the "don't try this at home" warning starting in season 4 ?

C'mon gib links or names at least
Yes, but... It didn't feel right. I dunno, I ain't a metalworker or a blacksmith, but aren't there blades specifically soft so they cut more or some shit?

I think each of these were in season 1

>but aren't there blades specifically soft so they cut more or some shit?
That's gibberish

I think you're thinking of how many blades are somewhat flexible so that they don't immediately shatter on impact.

Aren't katanas soft on the edge side and harder on the back?

So flexible, not soft. Got it.
But I still think Erin vs Scott would be more entertaining. Also Jon Wick, lol

The exact opposite. The soft back gives it flexibility for an otherwise way to hard cutting edge

NIce quads.
Alright, I'll stop spouting nonsense. Thanks!

I fucking hate these kinds of shows so goddamm much. Like, Chopped is a pure abomination that needs to die immediately.

That said, I fucking love Forged in Fire. The judges are actually chill as fuck, the host isn't an insufferable faggot instead he's fucking ex-special forces and can actually fuck shit up, the competition itself is interesting and fun to watch with good variety, and you as the viewer can actually see what the fuck is happening during testing and even pick a winner based on it, unlike Chopped where you see 3 snob motherfuckers complain that deep fried ice cream served on a hamburger with a side of chocolate milk and chili peppers tastes like shit.

Post yfw the blade is cherry red and the contestant walks over to the water bucket

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> it‘s a Russian immigrant mops the floor with the competition episode

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Ilya from that yt show, isn't it?

I fucking loved this one
his spiked shield was sick

> it‘s a final contestant sets his home forge on fire episode

>tfw listening intently for any popping, then waiting to see if there are any cracks

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>it's a guy is too hot and about to faint episode

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>the added sound effects for slicing meat

>blade test
>swings and messes up
>blames the weapon

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>mfw a show has a "don't try this at home" disclaimer

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>dude the handle lmao

>guy literally named Wil Willis
not sure why that amuses me so

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>link me up negro
>tfw negro actually links you up

So that's what they meant by "say the magic word!"

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> it‘s not about what your blade does to the ice, it‘s about what the ice does to the blade

i enjoy it also

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>contestant can't start coal forge episode

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I agree
it's nice when the audience can tell how nice the blade looks and how it performs just like the judges
with Chopped, you can only see what the food looks like and have to rely on some other faggot to taste the food for you

what was the deal with the outdoor episodes? didnt feel right at all

americans are renowned as terrible smiths and they don't really have suitable materials for historical blades. They do shit like heat treating and tempering damascened blades and then wonder why it shatters.

What about the spinoffs Knife or Death, Knight Fight or The Butcher?

he says KEAL, and that it means Keep Everyone Alive, or some shit like that.

Knife or Death is hilarious. Knight Fight is cringe, and The Butcher is bleh.

Lmao
>uh the uhhhh handle yeaaaaa

>black bladesmith
>blacks never developed smelting or metalwork

episode?

some did. they did stuff like this though

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>it's a Doug Marcaida is injured so his brother steps in episode

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they did and interestingly they never had a copper age, they went straight to iron around 800BC.

What’s he doing to get injured all the time

Using a lot of force on dogshit weapons that fall apart on impact

link me up negro

is that a black cock on the end of it? jesus, did jews invent this?

>copper
you mean bronze age, and that is because copper and tin are significantly rarer. they had to get tin from fucking britain.

Just watch the show nigga, it happens like every episode

Brainlet here. Are bags of sand a really good method for testing how well a blade can cut?

They're supposed to simulate boobs

keeling things

>contestant suckles on bags of sand episode

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Jason Knight > J. Neilson > Ben Abbot
Don't @ me.

>female smith makes a big deal about how females can be blacksmiths too
>gets eliminated in first round
That one older blonde smith was alright though

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>it's a vikingfag with a thor's hammer necklace
>it's a larper in medieval clothes
>it's a weeb in a kimono
>it's a native american talking about putting spirits in his blades

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For me, it was the guy who had those big yellow headsets

>it's a crazy Filipino man nearly burns down the neighborhood building a forge in a satellite dish in his back yard

Anyone else watch FiF: Knife or Death, too?

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Yeah it was based but the ice block challenge always blew people the fuck out

Am I supposed to believe that making a little sharp thingy takes any skill?

It requires a lot of skill ya simp

>skweaky voice female contestant episode

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It takes as much skill as cooking or baking

All based.

>it's a white dude in a kimono episode

go be a simp someplace else this is /keel/

>dude wearing a skirt episode

Its a kilt, not a skirt!

That one always dulled their blades but it was usually the one-slice fish or chicken that kicked out most people

>mid-swing during the strength test
>cut to commercial

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is there more?

She’s only been on once

no, I think she came back for one of the "audience favorite" episodes

>having a forgefu

>doug slices a pig in half and you orgasm episode

This was the first female smith to win, I think her name was Kelly

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>both swords wrecked by bungee cords episode

Man I just realized I haven’t seen one of the 2019 episodes yet

I watch this show on and off for the critical failures so it was a big pay off.

Nice get.

CHECK EM

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>Is turbo overcompensating manlet from Philippines pretends he knows how to forge the "old school way" in his back garden satellite dish and has fireman come visit him

Thats nice but I want more of the ugly nerd.

It's time you go see them. The GET god hath spoken

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She wasn't an ugly nerd, she was a former drug addict.

absolutely shall

Whatever nerd.

>Will has a weird middle part, long hair episode

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Jason > Ben > J.
makes my chuckle every time

What’s Ben’s accent?

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NEHEMIAH

That guy has Cloud's buster sword hanging on his fence for one of the shots.

He once said he was British but he doesn't have an accent native to these Isles

It's great that even back then everything in their life was revolved around muh dick

>instead he's fucking ex-special forces and can actually fuck shit up
I was impressed by the free hand shooting a .45 and hitting the edge of the blade. Then i wonder how many shots it took him to do it and how close he was.
Also i don't think hitting an edge with a lead bullet is a good way to test anything because ive NEVER seen that test fuck up a blade on the show. Id rather put my blade up against a bullet than that tall nutcase going at some antler with it.

>that episode where the guy almost burns down his whole garage and they have to call the fire department
Those are my favorite

Bumping so Thread is not keel

S2E4
2 years of experience shitting down the neck of his competition

>Forged in Fire
>Knight Fight
Bring back the best Wednesday lineup

How is Knight Fight? I usually only see /keel/ during late night marathons or shit like that

I remember that fire its actually the reason I started to watch the show

>comfy FiF thread
I didn't know these were a thing. Nice. Maybe I'll put on an episode.

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Claymore one at the top of the thread

It's a bunch of guys in armor knocking each other around for an hour. Sometimes they throw up in their armor. I really hope they make a 2nd season

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Knife or Death is funny as fuck and gets bonus points because Based Big Dimes Bill hosts it.

Knight Fight is cringe-tier faggotry, that one episode where there was that ridiculously big motherfucker who got gangbanged to hell yet somehow was passed onto the next round, only to be teamed with the other remaining big guy against two manlets they proceeded to demolish. Oh, his partner apparently already defeated him 1v1 but OF COURSE the big dude avenges himself because he's fucking like 7 feet tall, no shit. Have not watched since.

Never seen The Butcher but it sounds quite fucking stupid.

bill only draws Muhammad dimes now ya simp

>Vince jobbed Big Dimes Bill to geriatric 'Taker
Oh well, at least FiF is still based.

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>that asian dude who didn't forge a blade, just sharpened one of the pieces of metal he salvaged
What was he thinking?

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I'm not going to bother with The Butcher.
Another good show is Master of Arms, which is about weapon smiths, but it's on Discovery and I always miss it

Like Sons of Guns or different entirely?
>Sons of Guns
Speaking of that show, didn't the daughter get fucked by the dad?

Butcher is fairly boring. They get graded on making cuts from animals, then have to make something within the rules and finally get an exotic animal to cut. Something like a python or bison at the end.

Sons of Guns was a reality show about a Louisiana family, but Master of Arms is a competition show.

I kinda felt bad for him, but yeah, it was stupid

I wish Jason Knight did more episodes

>that smith who injures himself 5 minutes after the competition starts

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>the mentor and apprentice episode where the mentor just leaves for personal reasons

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>watching it on commercial TV
fucking kek

the apprentice should of won that episode, not just because I hated the chucklefucks he was against

> It's a Will is wearing his hair in a bun and has tight plum colored pants on episode.

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they def fucked right

like she was giving that aussie the cock hunger stare

ABSOLUTELY CHECKED

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>loser of the last round doesn't shake hands with the winner after leaving the forge

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What you got against Ben? I always liked that we got to see how qualified he is first hand, J and Jason are fine too though

What episode is this?

weak opinion

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Stayed home sick from work today, never seen this show before but watched quite a few episodes since this morning. Good thread Yea Forums

It was our privilege

>it's a water quenching episode

He fucking Exterminatus’d that competition

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J annoys the piss out of me with his constant autism. "Oh, the handle isn't specifically tailored to fit my hand perfectly, that's not good!" And how many fucking times has this jackass injured himself and then blames the weapon when he's fucking swinging like a madman retard with absolutely no coordination at all?

You know, typing all that out really makes me wonder why the fuck they let anyone but Doug/his brother/one of his students do the testing?

Mjolnir necklace = insta lose

I love watching J burst blood vessels in his eyes chopping the shit out of something

I liked Theo when his opponents handle cracked and he was like uhhhh do i still get to do the rest of the testing with this i dont want to end

Saved

Zoz

How come they have a machine to chop onto shields but they let these sweaty palm judges use full strength on coconuts or bones instead of using a controlled machine to exert equal force on every swing?

>it's a retard uses 24hr epoxy episode

>that run of episodes when they had to make hinged folder blades
I would be so god damn annoyed

user
is keel

I assume it distributes an outward push and resistance, in almost every direction with the only leakage being easy to clean up sand. Alternatively, water balloons and air balloons pop which sucks resistance wise, also is messy and/or dangerous.

Oddly enough molested chicks develop these voices young and at the time of abuse. It's also a way getting attention and false youthfulness.

yea whats up with his retarded tests? im sure not even the abs organization has testing that rigorous

>imma test the durability of this blade by hammering it into a wall of concrete

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/tpg/ fag looking for any inkling of comradery. Kys you sad loser.

why is j never on anymore?

do you have any examples of the squeaky voice? asking for a friend

No, just patients. But look up some famous actresses. The operative characteristics being baby voiced and ditzy.

Yeah, his tests really are turbo autistic, I don't even understand how the hell those are legitimate tests. At least the other ones have some kind of theme to them, his are mostly just some ridiculous kind of test nobody ever use to test strength/durability.

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if he had any actual form? At least he wouldn't be constantly injuring himself. Dude's knuckles bleed because he's a retard like every other episode.

Show me your every day carry knife, tv

The shows they have been airing after Forged in Fire I have been loving. Knife or Death, Knight Fight and now The Butcher. All great

wtf i added the pic

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when your hair gets long and you tie it back it seems to naturally get that dumb middle part

Based fucking Ilya.

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Good hair too

Ben>Goatee Guy>J

Dont @ me

Whole heartily agree. In addition to that, it's not one of those reality shows where they edit it to shit to make it seem like the competitors have drama.

forgechads truly compete in a gentlemans contest

Yeah, there’s been like 2-3 females. Seems like they were all farriers

>Contributes nothing

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loveline.fandom.com/wiki/Little_Girl_Voice

Great show

>sand
>easy to clean up

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>I'll remind you that this test is all based on what the XXX do to your blade and not what your blade do to XXX
>Judge start choping XXX
>Fuck yeah WOUUW LETS GO

>I'm gonna do a Damascus that will put me ahead in the eyes of the judges

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>it’s a canister damascus episode
“IM HAVING A HELL OF A TIME GETTING THIS CAN OFF, THE WHITE OUT DIDNT DO SHIT”

how else would I know if it "feels good in the hand"?

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Easier than a puddle of water. Sand is also used to clean up oil.

>I'm going to leave the can on it'll give my blade more flexibility
>doesn't plan ahead
>entire edge is mild steel
>spine is hard as fuck

Why has no one else done the paper lining that the one guy did?

My question is why doesn't anyone just wait for that shit to dry? I've done some can Damascus and all you have to do is literally let the white out dry it takes like 10 minutes.

>every blacksmith doesn't have wood and clamps ready to go incase the blade is warped coming out of heat treat

Never understood this. Seems like a surefire backup plan.

because Wil is standing power stance while shouting the time as loud as possible every 15 minutes

They probably panic because there's a time limit, just like when they handle that 5-minute epoxy

The Khanda episode is kino. That old man probably would've won against anyone else, but Abbott's forge game was just too strong.

>Yea Forums YOU HAVE JUST 2 HOURS REMAINING TO POST IN THIS THREAD

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holy shit thats nuts. have met girls with that voice before never really thought there was a reason behind it. (some may not have had an incident to change their voice)

I like the US armed forces episodes. I like the 2nd round tests on helmets and shit.

yet to this day their best contestant was the Filipino dude who forged in an old satellite dish

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fighting his evil twin, Doug Al-Qaeda

He lost on the champions episode.

Repsect for that dude though, he's a fucking boss at the forge. Laughed my ass off when the neighbors called the cops on his ass because they thought he was starting fires.

I liked that season premiere episode where it was people who only started smithing because they watched the show

The Irish guy is more beloved by fans.

this, daily reminder that in norse mythos Mjolnir was incorrectly forged due to Loki distracting the smith.

L A Y O N
L
A
Y

O
N

yeah, that one was good. It's always good to see new smiths do well.

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>hafted weapon episode
>crafts haft out of cheap soft lumber he had laying around the shop
>haft breaks

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kek read it in his voice

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>the curve in what should be a straight sword

:0

Thank you.

Didn't that happen with a broom handle? I think that guy had a really good chance, he just picked the wrong wood

>In Albany a man had a fire and killed everybody
The urban US. Not even once.

It's happened several times actually.

Based sword gook

>guy fucks up his knife
>makes this mess with wobbly horns instead

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BASED

That was actually pretty awesome.

I wish they did smaller knives sometimes in the first round. Great show though.

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>it's a slicing into a pig episode

What do they do with that meat?

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i hope someone takes it home, otherwise what a waste

They donate it to the losers as a consolation prize.

>winner only gets $10,000 after spending a whole day, probably more, on set plus 5 days at their home forge using their own materials
>show spends thousands of dollars on whole pigs to cut up and then throw away

say the word and i smoke his ass negro

I would do anything for an Ares, God of Love gif.

because of dumbass weebs that brought katanas

That's because the $10,000 prize isn't why the Bladesmiths who win are there.

The poor fucks who need $10,000 don't have the skills to win, and the poeple who win only do the show because that 1.) want to get their name out there so people will buy their custom knives and 2.) want to see their weapon buried hilt deep in a ballistics dummy and hear that their blade will keel.

in the aftershow the losing finalist has to eat the entire pig within 30 minutes or they get waterboarded
it's called "Forged in Fun"

>that episode with the tranny smith

OwO

>it's a guy makes a shitty blade but wins because everyone else's was even shittier episode

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>it's a "fat guy with a hammer of thor pendant around his neck that makes some comment about "the gods" watching over him" episode

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I'd watch this.

>I'm looking around and all the other anons are ways ahead of me in posts. I really need to pick it up if I want to make it through the thread.

>left the captcha machine on the slowest setting

Your post's handle really through off my (you).

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>dailymotion.com/video/x5hhh6f
ILYA MY MAN

I had some trouble with the epoxy.

>contestant grabs the 5 hour epoxy
do they seriously put that out there just to fuck with people?

They just need to stall

They must, or it's staged and they tell someone to wipe it all off for drama. I'm inclined to believe it's the former because I don't want to consider that F&F is actually forged in a crucible of lies.

>MY EPOXY ISN'T SETTING
>WTF
>contestant mixed part b twice and no part a

>gives up and just wraps their handle in leather or paracord

>what's he
>oh no
>no, please tell me he's not
>I can't watch
What did the contestant just do, /keel/?

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Quench into water.

Mentioned he goes on /k/

Hammering a cold blade

based

Tried to straighten out a warp by bending it in a vice.

quenched in gamer girl pee

turned in a flat piece of steel he simply grinded into a knife shape

Began seizing and convulsing profusely as his inner-jelly donut filling begins leaking onto the anvil before his final fatty meltdown?

>Gets bandaged up, guzzles a bottle of water, then finishes the round and gets insta-btfo
Every time, like pottery.

Under direct sunlight it becomes very hard to visually gauge the temperature of the steel because the glow of the metal is being drown out by the ambient sunlight. So your steel could be white fucking hot but it looks dull red because it's under sunlight.

>Shit was cash

fuck this took me back

>Everyone's mental image of a smith is a big beaded fat guy with giant arms and leathery skin
>The best smiths are invariably baby faced twinks
Funny how things turn out.

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Theo was based

he lost faggot and his channel is shit

dude won, retard

>when yous blade wont keel

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>Closeup of the sweat dripping off his unreasonably long beard

>throws a dad joke in your path

>tfw the other two smiths openly mock your blade failing

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>contestant casually drops the fact he's single and then smiles at the camera
Yeah but why tho? Does he think girls watch this show looking for prospective mates?

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I imagine the best smiths of antiquity were pasty autists who experimented and tweaked every little thing until they perfected their craft

For this sharpness test, im going to stand behind the meat and pretend its a human neck while i slice it open

>I’m going to go home and hug my wife and kiss my dog
>only I don’t have a wife or a dog
recent episode where they made >fantasy blades

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Say it to my fucking face and not online, see what happens.

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Sir, the Vikings set is next soundstage

>Does he think girls watch this show looking for prospective mates?
They should.

>when they test a long blade by bending it 45?degrees

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gay face

You funny man anonymous, I kill you last.

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>He didn't bring a fan as one of his tools

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>its a fat neckbeard wearing a kilt and crystal necklace episode

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This is the body type of a master bladesmith. You may not like it but this is what peak performance looks like.

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>contestant uses 5160 to make his weapon

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based

You could give him a flip flop and he would say it will keel

>coal forge episode
>contestants all burn their steel

24 HOUR EPOXY

>They go back to their home forge
>Camera guys can't help but get B-Reel of their various pets and animals doing cute things

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>Horse girl incorporates horse head motif into weapon
>Wins
Damn, that's fucking cool.

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> It's a Will is wearing his hair in a bun

It looks so bad, he's got a pinhead neanderthal kind of head nad he needs his hair loose to hide that

Like the WWE camera guys used to do.

burn through

I like the one where he spends 40 minutes to shit on boobplate hating fags.

Best smiths are always the sickos that get excited by the kill tests

I'm happy to see Kevin Farley is doing ok.

Welding without gloves.

>What do they do with that meat?

they bbq it, the short asian guy said it during an episode

Didn't she get to come back just to get btfo in exactly the same way.

>master of arms

I could never that the guy testing the weapons seriously.

>Gets a TV show on Discovery channel

it's a "woman smith goes out in first round" episode
>it's a "Doug Marcaida does a stereotypical Oriental bow and the smith returns the bow in the same fashion" episode
>It's a "Ben Abbot is friendly, constructive, and firm" episode
>It's a "Wil Willis yells at the smiths wildly as if he is lit on cocaine" episode
>It's a "Wil Willis criticizes the fuck out someones work yet knows shit all about smithing himself" episode
>It's a "white guy dresses like a samurai and gets btfo in the first round" episode

I remember the threads when this happened, and people realized how bad american construction is

he was next to a brick wall, and somehow the whole building set on fire

>it's a "my blade warped during the heat treat, so I'm going to try and bend it back into shape while it's cold" episode

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>its a "the guy who seems like a dumbass ends up btfoing the entire competition" episode

there's a lot of copper and some tin in Africa, and no I meant copper age, which is the stage before alloying copper to make bronze, using pure ores which produce pure copper.