How would you do on Naked and Afraid?

You’re already mental. Gyms don’t solve your self-loathing, they feed it.

There's no food. The last thing you'd wanna do is exercise.

Last couple seasons it has been the males doing that. I swear every fucking episode was like a girl power trip. The guy always goes home early the the girl makes on her own after doing nothing but cry and complain when the guy was there

Imagine the smell

I’d walk around with at least a semi, and if any of the other guys points it out, I’d shame him by asking why he was looking in the first place.

rape

I'm afraid of being naked so either really well or really terrible

would have a boner the whole time tbqh

im so horny
doesnt matter whats naked on the other end

it would end in rape for sure
i am hideous

break all the camera equipment and ambush the squad sent to look for me

>it's a cocky military vet gives up within 2 weeks episode

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Never gonna make it brah

>The last thing you'd wanna do is exercise.
No food. No internet. No gym.
What the fuck are we supposed to do?

How is it that none of the contestants ever got to fucking during the show

If it's a place with mosquitos fucking forget it. I am mosquito prime rib and would be eaten alive first day.

those quads don’t lie. strongest i ever was was when i was most self conscious. you can lift and work on yourself though. just do it before 26 or you’re that forever

well, theres always a nearby camera crew. there was that one guy with morning wood who said he went away to 'take care of it' every morning

I'd have a bigass boner the whole time haha

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Didn't the first girl on there get Dengue fever?

ofcourse it has, they have to make them look strong.

Because the women are always retards who drink river water and then spend the rest of the time having 24/7 diarrhea.

I'd ask if I could play with their titties behind the camera, then do it anyway once they refused because Africa and rules don't apply in Niggerland.

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i would have a boner the whole time

Yes, it'd probably be my only chance of ever seeing a hot woman naked irl

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you know what? Tits are pretty cool

Are strip clubs not thing anymore?

>hot
>10 seasons and not one single girl NOT covered in tattoos

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Probably be afraid of being naked.

Have any uncensored episodes been made available

ew.com/article/2014/08/21/dating-naked-lawsuit/

die immediately.

>strippers
>hot
not everyone lives in a metropolis, my man
outside of the large cities all the women are 6/10 at best

i would go from imagining the smell to living the smell

Asking the important questions.

>It's a woman finds a decaying bird in a stream and thinks she'll be fine if she cooks it long enough episode

I would literally kill myself because I dont want to be naked and sunburnt and miserable.

Post pics?

that melissa miller chick has bigger tits than 99% of all strippers. ive been to more than a few in vegas, and C cups and larger are rare. im not sure why that is nowadays, but the super vast majority of strippers in vegas and henderson are B-A cups. one girl an hour comes out with proper knockers

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New York model Jessie Nizewitz, 28, says the headline-making freshman reality series (trailer) flashed her crotch during one segment where she playfully wrestles with a date on the beach. Viewers noticed the unexpected reveal despite it being a very brief shot, and Nizewitz says she’s been humiliated on social media.

i seriously hope she lost that bullshit suit

she has implants you dumbfuck

cumception.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/03/vh1_dating_n-9398.jpg

do you expect any decent person to go on a show that requires you to be naked? of course they're covered in tattoos.

I got thrown out of a bar by a guy who was on there twice

Removed by producers.

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and so does the one chick per hour. shits all fucked

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Noice, thanks friend.
Honestly I'd be more upset if the world had seen my asshole like that.

Has there ever been an episode where they fuck?

Same reason as Survivor
Too many cameras and cameramen around

How do you stop yourself from raping the girls

this but unironically

>lose all my gains
>for 2 weeks of televised buffoonery

I don't think so

You’d lose all that shit in 2 weeks? What’s the point?

Reminder that the female contestants are provided with modern tampons and other feminine hygiene products. Kind of violates the spirit of going primitive.

SUNSET FOUND HER SQUATTING IN THE GRASS

Uh oh, don't get them started.

GROANING

Gymfags are the worst

it depends on where it was and who my partner was

THE MORE
H
E

M
O
R
E

SHE DRANK
H
E

S
H
A
T

my survival item would be a bottle of everclear, id just try and /havesex

I'm pretty good at survival camping, hunting and bushcraft, but my body is weak, specially my stomach.
I always get either constipated or diarrhea.

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Get kicked off probably for not doing anything the first few days then get mad or something on the 4th and 5th.

How often do they count the camera crew?

Ozzy banged Amanda on Survivor.
Abi banged Pete in the jury house.
JT banged Sugar until she went crazy and tried to off herself.
Plus a lot of hooking up off island.

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Just like in a real gym.

ozzy banged a 10/10, but she got peak ozzy too
who banged Figgy?

Is there any reason that someone couldn't just bring a 20lb bag of trail mix as their survival item?
Seems like an easy win since they give them a free knife and fire starter these days don't they?

>Gyms don’t solve your self-loathing

thats the point. gyms are efficient self harm

I would be paired up with an asian woman hopefully and make her children.

If it doesn’t happen within the first day it’s prob not gonna happen. Conditions usually deteriorate pretty rapidly as the contestants can’t find food or build a proper shelter or get any sleep or keep their fire going etc.

There was one couple who I thought for sure were gonna get together after the show was over but I don’t think they did. They were fawning over each other the entire 21 days.

they're doing episodes with couples and a few of them have fucked

because 20lbs of trail mix isn't going to be shit for 2 people over 3 weeks

i'd bring an RV as my survival item so i'd do great

It's way more than most teams eat their entire time on the show
Practically 1/2lb per person per day

20lbs of trail mix over three weeks works out at about 1000 calories per person per day. You could survive off that for months if you're not already a spooky skeleton. If you could scavenge ~500 calories a day on top of that you could last years.

>How would you do on Naked and Afraid?

FINALLY I would get to cuddle with a woman, even if its in a hastily made shelter during a rainstorm in Brazil.

Are you that naive that you believe they arent surrounded 24/7 by a shit ton of people ?

I'm 28, is it over for me?

Pretty much. All you've got to look forward to now is incontinence and Alzheimer's.

>I'm 28, is it over for me?
Its not over, you must apply yourself.

Getting mixed signals here.

I'd be naked and terrified

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>cumception.com

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It's okay user, I am the same way.

and how would you dilate?

Couldn't I just make my item one of those ultralight backpacking hammocks complete with mosquito netting? Get a good night of sleep every night not having to a give a shit about making a shelter, bust my ass during the day for food and ignore my female partner completely after giving her suggested tasks.

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fisting

>for almost all of human history, you got to go out, find a girl, and build a home together

It's not fair lads
I want to build a home in the prairie with my wife.

Gather food, maintain a fire, build better shelters and tools, masturbate.

as if you have the ability to do any of that or have ever even bothered to learn how

Yeah because there's no need because it can no longer be done, that's my point.

First episode I watched, god was that fucking hilarious.

you wouldn't have been able to step up anyway. not even back then. i'll bet you've never used a power tool in your life

Honestly I'd try to fuck the girl and leave after a few days.

>no survival skills
>hate the outdoors, terrified of insects
>positively unattractive body
>go on to get paired with a greedy stacy willing to embarrass herself in front of millions for a shot at money
>drag her down and disgust her as long as I can with my complete uselessness
>drop out eventually, dooming her to lose as well

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half of the tits are attached to dicks these days. at least the show can confirm if they're women or not. did you know 99% victoria secret models are actually trans? that is victorias secret.

back to >>/fit/

damn. thats unironically deep

this

it's called being so strong that bodyweight is a step down, you pedo.

stay strong broh

this

10/10

Good, if I was without a fucking woman.
That one chick who threw their only knife into river just because she was butthurt that the two guys didn't cater to her hard enough is the comment on entire gender.
How did they not murder her on the spot I will never know.

Good possibility it was set up by producers, desu. All these shows are bullshit.

I'd slap my belly and writhe around, screaming about tendies, until I got my way. Just like every night.

Based retard wasting calories in jungle setting. Do you know how I know you'd be dead within two days?

Well go ahead and do it, there are plenty of women out there, at least one of them is bound to be up for the task, even if you need to sort through millions of females.
The show is overdramatised bullshit, mate. It's American TV, and like all things American, it's got to be obnoxious and in-your-face, because gods forbid there would be a quiet moment or a lack of conflict - the profits would plummet, the channel would have to close down, millions would lose their jobs.

one of the best contestants.

Throwing hissy fit and ruining things that keeps them in comfort is bog standard female behavior, mate. No need for dramatization.

Which girl on this show had the best ass?

>Viewers noticed the unexpected reveal despite it being a very brief shot

this.
chadbro knows

the one who was on with the neckbeard who just sat around doing nothing and eating cactus all day while she sat out in the sun trying to purify water with a magnifying glass or the one that was on with the guy who got a really bad sunburn and was wearing women's underwear

sex. Actually a lot of world class athletes take breaks of 10 days in a row. Like Larry Wheels.

based everclear-poster

Chase and turkey slap the camera crew

I've never watched this show but now it sounds kino