Itt: Awkward first date movies

Women have this thing where they dont want to be percieved as sluts but they still want to fuck.
Is basically a test to see if you are a beta.

"We'll sleep on the same bed but no sex tehe". Guess what you are supposed to do.

>first date
>take her to a flick
I hope you don't do this. At least go to dinner or get coffee or something so you can get a feel for each other first.

Wow what the hell, that’s awful

yeah I know, what I'm asking is how that guy didn't do anything and just slept next to his date without doing a thing

Had an ex pull this first time she spent the night. Said she was on her period or something. But that didn't stop her from tossing on my pajama pants and giving me head.

I screamed out loud during the whole hands with eyes scene, fuck that movie the fuck subtitles I can’t even hardly read

No, of course. I just worded it a bit bad, I only meant a first “movie date”. You normally don’t take someone to the theaters until you’re comfortable groping each other in the dark

>go see the Darjeeling Limited the first time I meet a girl
>early sex scene goes on longer, and becomes more explicit, than either of us expect in a Wes Anderson film
>next time we meet, she comes to my house
>put on a clockwork orange, because it’s one of my favorite films
>oh wait, there are like 4 rape scenes
>can’t even imagine what she’s thinkinh as we watch
>she touches my dick that night anyway

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This depends on the age and IQ of the date in question.

Nah, it was great in the theaters! And actually, it ended up working out between the girl and I for a good few years

You jumped from a Wes Anderson film to A Clockwork Orange? Respectable power play there

Movie dates are ideal for autismo’s like me.
>technically doing something together, despite not actually interacting
>afterwards, have something to talk about at dinner
>can bond over mutual interest or disdain for the movie

>she was biting her lower lip during some of the scenes
Never stick you dick in crazy is a fucking myth. Don't fall in love with them though.

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Cringe. Incel, we know you've never had sex

Goth chicks, dude.

good guess. we are actually married now.

My fault, replied to the wrong damn comment

I took a girl to see Across the Universe and she proceeded to sing each and every song loudly and horribly. I’ve never sank so far into my seat

Never went on a date, never kissed a girl, not even close.
25 years old.

Does she have a big meaty pussy or does she got one of those inny pussies like a girl does? Shit I could’ve phrased that better

I don’t understand, as a 40-year-old Boomer, how this can be something that’s real. In high school everybody was throwing dick and pussy at everybody else for four straight years. Even fat guys and fat bitches and ugly people got pussy and Dick. It was like a fuck buffet for four years. How the fuck is that not the case now?

I went to go see A Dangerous Method on a first date with a bisexual secretary from work. The second movie we watched together was Killer Joe. We made out on the couch while it rained outside. Then she ended up going back to her ex girlfriend who I also worked with.

She’s dead now. It makes me sad. She was a nice girl and didn’t deserve what happened.

I don't know. I mean I took her home and we got into bed and I asked to kiss her and turned out the light. I think I said something like "I know you said no sex but can I kiss you?" or something cringe beta like that before kissing her.

She met up with me again and we made out on the bed (well actually I have no idea how to french kiss so I drooled on her) and I asked to see her boobs at one point, she spent the rest of the day with me and then called me the next day and was upset about it. Never saw her again. I called her a few times after but she always ignored me.

Like six months later she called me back and wanted to try again but I said no at that point. I was too embarrassed.

I think I'd be better on a date now than then, but, maybe not. That was like 8 years ago. I haven't been on a date since.

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Damn. Sorry user. What happened?

I'm a 33-year old boomer and never had sex. I was a weird kid in school and was so nervous about girls that I just never had any success. I didn't go to the cool parties or anything. People liked me I think, but, I was just weird. I was never bullied or anything. Both Chad's and Stacey's were pretty nice to me and my school was known for being kinda mean.

Wine and Painkillers. Apparently accidental overdose. Roommate came home to find her on the floor with blue skin. Took her to the hospital where she was pronounced braindead.

I had a dream the other night that she made a cameo in. She was far away. Stuck behind some kind of glass. But she was waving and smiled. So that gave me some kind of metaphysical hope that she’s okay wherever she is

Well if she didn't get cremated then she is probably at a cemetery m8. Can always ask her ex where she it at, she probably knows.

>made her watch Clockwork Orange

>Watching Girl with Dragon Tattoo
>rape scene comes in

Do people still go to movies for dates? Seems kinda boomer to me.

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Current girlfriend and I watched the True Grit remake on our first date. I liked her because she laughed at the weird stuff like when Rooster kicked that little Indian boy off the porch.

Tetsuo the iron man.

now even the ugly girls can get Chad through dating apps

so everyone else stays alone

Closest thing I've ever had to a date was watching a shitty horror movie with my best friend's younger sister while he was passed out drunk.

Tell me more about this!?

Basically same here. We shared a blanket too because it was cold. Her leg rubbed against mine a few times, probably not intentionally. I had to hide my boner, she smelled so good too and was fresh out of the shower.

What a cunt. She probably just knew it is le funny meme movie and wanted to seem cool and different but then realized her mistake. Not your fault at all.

Not much to tell. Their parents were out so he called me up to watch horror movies, but helped himself to his dad's booze and checked out. His sister was going out with friends, but didn't for whatever reason, so we spent the night watching that movie about an evil tooth fairy. I was 17 and she was 15 or so. Nothing happened aside from her resting her head on my shoulder. After the movie ended I just went home.

>Nothing happened aside from her resting her head on my shoulder.
That's awesome dude. I was happy with just the leg.

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that's just an indication you're not a good match user
don't take it personally, and don't hate the girl. it just is what it is

probably Mars Needs Moms because i'd just be looking lovingly into Ki's eyes and ignoring the girl i was dating.

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Silence of the lambs

You fucking idiot.

>His sister was going out with friends, but didn't for whatever reason
>Nothing happened aside from her resting her head on my shoulder

She liked you Jesus fucking Christ

The fault in our stars she read the book and said it wasn’t faithful and we both walked out. Still kinda mad that I wasted that money.

the movie was great though? wtf is wrong with her?

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It seems for those who have read the book disagree with her. She made up for it for liking night crawler.

>tfw we saw shape of water

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Will you niggas missed out then, because the pussy used to flow like wine in the olden times. Hell I was in the south and even faggots were getting dick left and right

Typical roastie response

I went to see that movie when it came out because I had a few hours to kill, and I fell asleep and a 10-year-old girl punched me in the shoulder and said “wake up boy”, obviously I had no idea who she was and I came alone, but does that count as a date?

was she hot?

Well I mean it would be a little fucked up to say that a 10-year-old girl was hot but, yeah

>I said no
Based Stone Cold Steve Autism

>braindead
Well she was literally a wine and xanax roastie

>I have been dating a girl since The Life Aquatic came out

>We used ticbe part of the same friend circle in school, now we live in different states only see each other to go watch Wes Anderson film together

>I uses to assume we would eventually get married

>she was a petite cosplaying alt girl, now is a green haired angry far left cat lady who angryposts on facebook about being punped and dumped and attacks white men constantly

>I am a sensible conservative and engaged to a beautiful woman and don't think I will continue this tradition any longer

I was so happy someone was taking interest in me that I was blinded before: the fact was that she was only interested in me because I have some money.

>Refn
Not awkward a all.
I was at a bar and a girl asked me what i was doing later that evening. I told her i was going to watch The Neon Demon by myself and she wanted to tag along.
I think she was disgusted by parts of it, but she really dug the whole fashion vibe, told me make up artistry was her hobby and a i got to fuck her.
Based Refn got me laid.

This is totally based if true.

'Tis the truth and nothing but the truth, swear by me mum.

ah-bloo-bloo

>be freshly single
>ask girl I've known for years who's recently single out to movies
>she says yes and we go see Mad Max
>realize I'm out of the loop when it comes to dating and get nervous as hell
>decide to take some shots of my roommates whiskey to loosen up
>roommate says he will do some shots with me
>take about 10 shots and walk to the movie theater
>realize this is a bad idea when I see how packed it is and how close it is to show time
>find her waiting for me as I stumble in
>user whats wrong with you?
>tell her I had a few drink with roommate and she laughs
>we walk into movie and see there's barely any seats left
>manage to find seats in the middle front row
>almost looking straight up to view movie
>too fucked up to be nervous
>ask her if she wants popcorn and drinks
>she says yes and I head out
>get into lobby and have the spins pretty bad
>wait in line spinning for a good ten minutes
>finally get to register and get popcorn and large drink
>as I'm paying the smell of butter starts making me nauseous
>trying hard not to puke but cashier is taking his time getting my change
>gives me my change and thanks me
>all the sudden I start getting warm spit in my mouth and know it's about to go down
>drop my popcorn and soda on the ground and before my popcorn even hits the ground I'm puking all over it
>pretty much silence all around me while I'm puking my brains out
>I stop puking and look up to see the disgust on everyone's face
>don't know what to do so I end up running home
>girl calls me soon after asking me what happened
>tell her about my puke scene
>tell her the only reason I drank was because I was nervous to see her
>she says ok and that she has to go
>hang up never expecting to hear from her again
>laying down still fucked up when hear a knock on the door
>she's at my front door and says shes going to take care me
>spend the rest of the night with her

That was 7 years ago and were still together

yes user, of course...

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Avengers: Age of Ultron

She had the local hick accent and I couldn't even feel her up because her mom insisted on chaperoning us. It was just a long awkward stretch between us that made me refuse to meet my set-up prom date until the night of the event.

Based and redpilled

I went to see flightplan in middle school with my first gf. She kept making out with me but I was sort of asexual at that age and it was just mostly annoying. Also the movie was awful. I smile though looking back because her parents loved me, she was this super cute little Mexican girl and I’m blond haired blue eyed and I think her parents were proud of her or something lol. Anyways she would call me everyday on our landline after school and holy fucking shit it was annoying I just wanted to play Star Wars battlefront with my little bro so eventually she broke up with me. Now I’m a good old fashioned boomer who took the rural pill with a white wife and kids but man this flashback really helped me realize I’m a monster sipping shitstain boomer.

That's actually pretty wholesome.

>Used OKCupid
>Found a girl who I could talk with fairly well
>After a week of talking, we decided to meet up for first date
>Meet her after work at the theatre
>We decide to see Warm Bodies
>Have my hand on her thigh throughout the movie, no response
>After the movie, we converse in the parking lot, she had to go
>Never saw her again
Ah well, I've had better dates, and while I could have done things better, I think she may have had social anxiety.

What kind of flyover or suburban shithole are you from?

I took a girl to see Finding Dory because she went on about how much she loved Pixar and Disney and ended up falling asleep.

Ok, Neon Demon, not so awkward, but Only God Forgives? It was so artsy and slow, and then abrupt scenes of horrific violence. But I totally agree, Refn got me married, man.. might have not worked out and ended in a bit of a messy divorce, but what can ya do

If sitting on your bed watching Netflix is your thing, you do you

2nd hobbit movie
I got dumped afterwards

Movies are so expensive now, shit idea for a first date

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I watched the movie I wanted us to go see before the date to make sure it wasn't too weird. Luckily it was a good first date movie, but on the actual date she kept getting mad at me every time I told her to pay attention because a good part was coming up.

I Haven't been on a date sense 2008 haha.

>Blue is the warmest color
It was a some years ago, I just haven't read anything before watching it with that girl and it was extremely awkward. Jesus

>but didn't for whatever reason
>whatever reason

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Saw Django with a black GF. Needless to say I could feel the mostly negro crowd look at us a couple of times

Are you that cute frog guy?

>mfw this happened to me
>mfw I never gave much thought "eh, bitch is probably tired or something"
>mfw I could've had sex that night
>tfw 32 year old wizard

user.. she wanted you to rape her.

I wish I was kidding.

I hope to god you're not bullshitting. Is sounds like she's a very sweet girl. How are things going now?

Next time a woman tells you that she wants to sleep with you but “no sex” know that means she wants to be raped.

>first date, ever
>she brought her friend
>nobigdeal.vtf
>went to a restaurant
>everything's going fine, i'm not sperging out, actually conversing
>her friend is an actual slut, brags about fucking a guy in a park
>i pay for all of us (i know)
>later we spend like 3h walking around town
>both of them would make jokes about what people were wearing, like fucking teenagers
>go to a shop to buy liquor, i pay again (i know)
>the girl mentions our bet from few days earlier (she won a kiss)
>i sperg out and take like 30s getting ready (first kiss ever)
>was so nervous that i don't actually fucking remember it happening
>later we walk around more, she hugs me on goodbye
>was tired as fuck
that was 2 years ago, haven't been trying since. i feel like even if i try, i'll end up sperging out and losing all chances anyway. it's a lost cause. i have vidya games to play
and FUCK women

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>smacks lips