>I think it should’ve been horror. I think that it landed in a place—both in our minds and the studio’s—that it could be PG-13 and sort of a boy’s adventure… I really think we made a mistake not—I mean I’m not sure we could’ve made this movie, but I think if we could’ve made a darker, more hard-boiled look and make it The Gunslinger’s character study more than Jake. I think in retrospect that would’ve been more exciting. We always felt like we were kind of holding back something, and I think at the end of the day it was that.
comicbookmovie.com
I think it should’ve been horror...
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poor Americans. They're so childish and simplistic they make everything they touch turn to shit
put a brit nigger to play a cowboy
has matthew mcounaghey thag would be kino at the leading role
wow, how dumb
Ayo Hol Up! that nigga ain't Clint Eastwood
Mcounaghey was the best part of the movie
AAAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEEEEEEEEEERIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!
This dumb motherfucker, the story was written by an American in the first place. What great thing has your country even made recently, or touched that hasn't turned to shit?
>pick up a fucking book about a cowboy in a fantasy wasteland with weird sci-fi
>hmmmm could can we adapt it?
>hey, he meets a kid in the book, what if we make HIM the protagonist?
>FUCKING GENIUS
How hard is it to get a job in Hollywood? Jesus Christ
>"I mean I’m not sure we could’ve made this movie",
>but we really really wanted the money.
>poor
It's hard to believe you when my first inclination is to think your post is dripping with envy
Amazon just finished shooting an apprently faithful adaption of Wizard and Glass
Thank pedowood for that shit. Sometimes all they care about is filming a kid and hope they can get lucky enough to find time alone with them.
Thats what pedos do. They make there life so they can surround it with children just for the off chance they can have rime alone with one
>Wizard and Glass
why? where's The Drawing of the Three?
I sound like a shill, whatever, but Amazon's building up a lot of goodwill with me by testing the waters with a focus on quality. They'll likely ruin it with their LOTR shot but we'll see. Patriot was very good, very strange. It made me think about watching Rectify on Sundance the first time. Caught me completely off-guard
based pedos achieving their dark fantasies and getting away with it
they create time alone
and the Anesthesiologist does the rest
then they get to fuck the unconscious little shits brains out for hours upon hours
>we should have focused on the Gunslinger instead of the kid and made the movie darker
No shit!!!
Well at least he can publicly recognize he fucked up
oh look another russian trying to cause problems
>Roland is literally a carbon copy of Clint Eastwood
>They cast a black man
>His guns are supposed to be huge handcannons
>They give him a toy gun
Literally the reason why every terminator movie since 2 has sucked
Muh pg-13 audience content
>called Dark Tower
>STARRING Eardrum Elbow
>NO FULL FRONTAL ERECT BLACK PENIS NUDITY
and they wonder why it flopped
Because Wizard and Glass is the best book and it works as a standalone story
I never read the novels. But I I read the comic books marvel made a few years back. Not sure if they followed the book. But it followed Roland when he was young. Really beautiful drawn and I always thought they would have made a great t.v. series
follow the books order, who is in charge? Kubrick's son?
I can't wait for the Seven Samuria vs an army of Doctor Doom robots wielding lightsabers and golden snitches adaptation.
fucking cunts won't admit real reason this flopped lmao get fucked stupid bitches
fucking god everything after wizard and glass is such shit. back and forth to new york and maine every other fucking chapter. the whole car crash section with king and jake is so eyerolling
The absolute FUCKING retards. The first book is set up perfectly for a studio to dip their toe into the Dark Tower series and see what the fan/financial reaction is - small cast of characters, simple setting (the dying/colliding world weirdness is only hinted at in book 1), easy to digest story.
>open with Roland chasing Flagg
>Roland meets the farmer guy
>tells the guy some of his backstory in Gilead
>short scene of young Roland in Gilead to establish that plot thread for later flicks
>cut to Flagg in Tull reviving the guy and preaching/whipping the residents into a religious fury
>cut out the fat lady/revolver abortion for the sake of the normals
>Roland reaches Tull
>cut out Allie for brevity
>Roland has a drink, townspeople lose it, he fights his way out
>gets to the waystation, meets Jake
>continues into the mountains while Jake tells us his backstory
>faithful handcart scene for an action setpiece + horror element
>Roland drops Jake, meets with Flagg
>they talk
>Flagg puts Roland to sleep
>he wakes up on the beach, looking confused and worried
>screen fades to black
>audio from Jake's fall plays
>"go, then. there are other worlds than these."
>audio of Jake's scream as he falls plays
>cut to Jake waking up in bed with a scream, sweaty and terrified
>looks around his room in absolute confusion and terror
>roll credits
>I think it should’ve been horror.
it should've been whiter
But it had Idris Elba playing a white character, so that means it's automatically AWESOME AND EPIC, right? Any $oyboy dream cast starts with Idris Elba as a white character, so how did it fail?
Also, we shouldn't have cast a talentless britbong as the Clint Eastwood character.
They fucked up utterly when they cast Mconnaughey as Flagg instead of Roland. He should've played Roland, and Goggins should've played Flagg.
>cut to Jake waking up in bed with a scream, sweaty and terrified
>looks around his room in absolute confusion and terror
I would not show jake again. He doesnt show up for a while
Hey, this would've actually worked. Damnit.
This. The 1st book is so encapsulated from the rest of the series, in tone and lore, it works relatively well by itself.
I'd have Jake waking up as a post-credits though, don't want people thinking it was all the dumb kid's dream.
Ron, you should have just followed the The Gunslinger to a fucking T. The entire novel plays out perfectly for a screen adaptation. I could never understand why it was so difficult to translate to the screen. Sure, book 2 and 3 get tougher to adapt with the lobstrosities, Roland using the doors to occupy Eddie, Susannah, and the Pusher, reconciling his split memories, the house, and Blain the Mono, but The Gunslinger is a perfect origin tale. It slowly introduces the protagonist, his world, establishes his quest, his training can be shown through flashbacks while also introducing the man in black as the antagonist, and then introducing Jake to show what Roland is willing to do to fulfill his quest. It should have been a 3 hour Western kino with elements of horror and fantasy that ended on the beach after his night with Walter and set up a sequel.
2>3>5>1>4>6>7
honestly, this user had it worked out pretty well
>[behind blue eyes start playing]
What does unironically goes into the mind of Hollywood executives?
pt 2
someone post the webm of the continuity error
I would agree, but leaving it on a big, weird cliffhanger like that might be good for word of mouth among the normals. I think you could add Jake's New York chapters from the Wasteland into the narrative of Drawing of the Three, for the movie anyway. Intercut scenes of Jake going about his days at Piper and slowly losing it, becoming obsessed with doors and roses, while Roland draws Eddie and Susannah (still not sure how best to handle Detta/Odetta), then potentially end the movie with them drawing Jake through. Drawing is an amazing book, but like 50% of it is Roland dying on a beach, so that can be pared down quite a bit.
you have forgotten the face of your father
Lad, you probably won't believe me, but I'm and those are my posts in your caps. Thank you, because I couldn't remember what I'd originally put for after Roland drops Jake, and it's way better than what I wrote above.
Viggo was my original choice, but he's too handsome. Viggo isn't "long, tall and ugly". Mconnaughey is.
in other words, POC washing the main character had nothing to do with it, I mean, really, people people didn't spend 20+ years reading The Dark Tower series thinking about Roland and what he looked like, how dare they not like a black man in the roll.
Amazon picks
I find it impressive that the issue with the film isnt even that they cast a nigger.
Its that they bastardized the story so much that it wasn't even a Dark Tower film.
>hurr lets make him black and give him a child sidekick and make half the movie in New York City
what the FUCK were they thinking lmao
I havent even read the books and even I know that's all wrong
well, its certainly part of it. if he was black and the story was good it would've been alright I guess, but it just shows an overall misunderstanding of the source material and audience, their fucked choices run deep
>How hard is it to get a job in Hollywood?
you ever see that talk Kevin Smith gave about the Superman movie getting pitched to him and the producer was obsessed with giant spiders? and years later that guy made Wild Wild West and there was a giant spider? That guy started out as a hair dresser for some famous actress and thats how he got his foot in the door.
nice.
eh, vig's aged now. he's handsome in a rugged way, which roland would be. he's only "ugly" cuz he's so damn tired and rugged. vig could do it.
There was a big point of the gunslinger being white in the books too
kek
But you need a white guy as Roland to do Susannah Dean
>the absolute state of these rankings
1 > 4 > 2 = 3
The rest aren't worth mentioning.
this, also unironically.
Bingo
Did you read the books? the only reference to racerace I can think of is on book one where the narrator describes the man in blacks color as pallid and further states that so was the gunslingers.
did they really make Flagg and John Farson the same person in the funnybooks?
JUST REMAKE IT AND CAST IAIN GLEN AS ROLAND
No what is the talk called?
Remember that Stephen King didn't object to a single white illustration of Roland and casually says "nigger" all the time. He's a hypocritical virtue signalling piece of shit and Maturin should've chosen someone better to tell this story.
Did you forget about Detta Walker, the extremely racist black broad in book 2 whose vocabulary is confined to "honky mafa" and "white boy"? Her entire character revolves around her being black and Roland/Eddie being "white oppressors".
Sometimes I think Ron Howard spends his entire career being trolled by his producer Brian (((Grazer))), who subtly sabotages everything for lels and privately thinks Howard is the top good goy of all time. Is there a safer white director than Howard? He spent two decades talking up The Dark Tower as this massive TV series meets movie franchise. It was on Ain't It Cool News for years, rumors and how expensive it'd be, and how it was the next Star Wars.
And then The Dark Tower is made and every detail is a disaster. It seems impossible. I remember a writer on Ain't It Cool, this is his fav book series ever, and he went to the set and his instincts told him it was complete shit. Even how small Elba's pistols were, it seemed like an inside joke. It was like a 90s shit tier blockbuster that was promoted on gallons of Pepsi.
If Amazon goes as hard as GoT with tits, blood and magic then it'll be a massive success. Anything less is not going to cut it
>we could’ve made a darker
Darker than Idris Elba?
I could get behind this.
Why are people in Hollywood so fucking dumb?
Kevin Smith meets Jon Peters. Peters is a Jewish legend, that movie Shampoo is about him.
Detta was such a fuckin whackjob. Who would even be willing to play Detta/Odetta?
Meh. Book 4 is overrated cause it's a standalone coming of age book. The first three are the best.
That's good casting user
In the prologue Stephen King talks about Clint Eastwood as Roland and the LotR as base for the book
>Wizard and Glass is the best book
Fuck no. I'd pick the first 3 books over the filler backstory that is most of Wizard and Glass.
lel i was just thinking about that part in the stand where the country singer dude's mom says he sounds like a nigger on his big hit song. king does have his characters say nigger a lot but, to be fair, most of his books worth reading are set in time periods where the word was said much more openly.
You think these creatures read the books?
Paakkonen looks right.
I'd honestly take jon peters over execs and test audiences these days, the dude was a jackass and a bully, but he gave a damn about his directors even if he would drive them to murder him
To me it felt like it was two films in one, and they didn't mix well. It started out with intense body/nightmare horror with the skin people, capturing teenage angst and recurring nightmares pretty well and then somehow turned into a teenage action adventure film somewhere around the middle.
I mean, all they had to do was not cram the entire series into one less than 2 hour long movie. It should have at least been a proper trilogy, but would have been better served as an HBO series.
She was portrayed as evil though. She was the good nigress' evil split personality.
No you really don't. Eddie needs to be white, maybe. But Roland doesn't have to be. It doesn't take that much to write around it
It was still largely taboo at the time. You can also find interviews where he almost says nigger out of habit.
Meh, got me there. Detta did repeatedly refer to roland and Eddie as honky mofos. That aspect isn't nearly as relevant to susannah who isn't just in book 2.
They're juice who view our world as a mistake they must fix via "tikkun Olam" but in the meantime they just give each other cush jobs that require zero labor and they make movies because 1) it provides a comfy life and hot women 2) they can subvert society and promote subversive agendas that quicken their process of "fixing" the world via propaganda 4) they can pollute our world with garbage in order to slow whites' progress and to simply have fun in a darkly pessimistic if you got em smoke em way.
They didn't make it for fans of the series, they didn't make it for newcomers. Who was supposed to be excited for this movie?
>Eddie needs to be white
I rather have Eddie as black instead, his only interesting thing is that he is a yunkie
>But Roland doesn't have to be.
Yes he does, otherwise his relationship with Detta Walker in Drawing of the Three makes no sense.
Reminder that the perfect man for the part still isn't too old to play Roland.
Lmao no one watched it because they made him a nigger, that was mistake number one and they're too afraid to say it
This. Detta's character depends on the entire party being white. Detta is supposed to be enraged because she's a minority even in a small group. Even one other black character would ruin that frustration and she'd try to team up with the other nigger.
It does if you understand Detta. Detta hates white people, but a lot of her attitude is a big act. And she can just as easily call Roland an Uncle Tom or a house nigger. Its not that complicated.
I loved book 4 and rank it 2nd just behind book 1. It's one of those King stories where the setting and characters feel vividly real. Roland and Susan's relationship had this kinda idyllic, Greek tragedy type shit to it that just hit straight home for me, and the serene setting of a quiet ranch town with sinister machinations behind the scenes set against the backdrop of the war with Farson was a fantastic change of pace after the interdimensional sci fi/horror that is book 3. Plus Susan's death is almost singlehandedly responsible for turning Roland into the absolute stone cold badass he is by book 1, so it's not so much filler as it is extended exposition.
It's amazing society hasn't gotten rid of you things yet.
Quite frankly this. Reading Wiz&G after the cliffhanger with Blaine the Monorail in the previous book was such a letdown.
It would be easier and more effective to save the gymnastics and just make everybody but her white.
Why not make everyone else black and her white?
>just an act
It was a fucking mentally ill split personality cause by a fucking Home Alone brickjob. Bitch hated white people. Period. There's no reason to waste screentime explaning why she hates niggers, too when they could just follow the book and cast whites instead.
>you now remember Little Sisters of Eluria
fucking good story, lads. i read Wind Through the Keyhole but i can't remember a fucking thing about it
To spare your feelings?
A couple of years ago you had to have Idris Elba in everything, now it is that horrible mulatto Tessa Thompson, in a couple of years will be another diverse actor ....
Why not just follow the races as written? If race isn't supposed to matter then accuracy to the source material should be a priority.
>Home Alone brickjob
Trips of truth.
sweetie
White people aren't that racist.
Well, other than liberals.
Let's rewrite the story from her perspective as a white womyn helping the people of color.
You don't have to explain shit. You take the exact dialogue she has, swap out her "graymeat, honky mahfah" lines and stick in "house nigger." Its not gymnastics or difficult.
Detta is a second personality, but her persona is an act to some extent. Eddie points out that she's deliberately laying on her accent thick. But I suppose knowing that would require you to actually pay attention to the book.
the logic is sound
who would make the best Eddie? inb4 Aaron Paul
This. If hollywood wants more black protagonists then I'm sure there are a shitload of black-led scripts just sitting around. If you're adapting a book, then cast appropriately. The same people saying that Roland being black is fine would go up in arms if a white man was cast as Blade.
Amazing how it only takes one faggot to completely shit up a good thread, but that’s essentially what’s John Farson was so it follows.
i will watch if Roland is white
So make it obvious from the start rather than have the characters come to this conclusion naturally? Genius. Again. There is no point in arbitrarily changing any character's race in any adaptation.
Also it won't work. You can't forgive white people for things they said in the past.
Source
Any reader with an ounce of wit would struggle to pay attention to the dullest franchise in the history of book franchises? Seriously each installment following the boy gunslinger and his pals from New York Fucking City as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the prog-rock imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of descriptive language, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.
Perhaps the die was cast when King vetoed the idea of stopping at four books; he made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody - just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for the rest of his writing. The Dark Tower series might be anti-Vietnam War (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-Dunsaney series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.
>a-at least the first book was good though
"No!" The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character bit the dust, the author wrote that "ka is a wheel."
I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. King's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that he has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of The Dark Tower by the same J. K. Rowling. She wrote something to the effect of, "Stephen King is actually a gay pedophile" And she was quite right. She was not being ironic. When you read "The Dark Tower" you are, in fact, trained to dickride Stephen King.
>If hollywood wants more black protagonists then I'm sure there are a shitload of black-led scripts just sitting around.
Nice rosy-eyed goggles there faggot. People (ps. progressives aren't people) write characters as their own ethnicity and usually gender. And since the average nigger is borderline legally retarded, that means all the people writing scripts about them are as well.
Thus we can deduce that for every non-shit script about niggers, you'll find thousands about non-niggers. And even those are few and far between.
Truth is, to get niggers into shows, you have to race change non-nigs into nigs, there just aren't enough non-shit stories about nigs to choose from otherwise.
You're arguing roland needs to be white because of interacting with Detta for half a book.
Some King interview on the street. About ten to fifteen years ago.
>reminder that Neo was originally black and Morpheus originally white
What went so right?
That's their problem. It shouldn't be mine.
Wizard and glass is one of my favorites. My absolute favorite is the drawing of the three. Book 1 was a little weak.
I only like the 2nd book, I really think it is a good book, better than the first, I also stopped in Wolves of the Calla tired Roland years ago
And this alone is stronger than any argument made that he should be black. There is zero reasoning why such a change should be made. It's not an improvement on his character in any way, shape, or form.
Make what obvious? The fact that its an act? How would it be more obvious?
John Farson was so much cooler when he was just some random rebel that brought down a civilization. Someone said he's Flagg under a moniker in the comics.
>How would it be more obvious?
By having her prove it's not just racism immediately by calling another black character an Uncle Tom.
No one is arguing that he "should be black." Only that it doesn't matter nearly as much as you fags thinks.
The single good argument for any character to have a certain ethnicity when it's not explicitly plot relevant is how well a specific actor fits that character. See
I thought he was supposed to be a guy Flagg was manipulating.
Do you illiterate retards not understand what "Uncle Tom" means?
If it didn't matter, you wouldn't need to suggest it for literally every white character ever written.
shouldn't the existence of this picture settle this debate you retarded faggots are carrying on?
Except it does, for the still solid reasons listed.
The wachowski trannies weren't adapting an outside work.
they have no idea.
listen lad, we all love Idris Elva and he would be our first pick in any blacked production, but he didn't work as Roland, this don't work as comercial product neither, sorry
If you think everybody but you is incapable of reading comprehension, then it might actually be you.
I don't. I just liked Idris Elba as Roland and took 5 minutes to think about how it could work
I didn't even watch this movie because it was blackwashed. And yes, there are people who deny that blackwashing exists.
Yes, but niggers and nigger sympathizers are blisteringly and even intentionally retarded.
america btfo yet again
The cliffhanger is resolved before Roland starts his story, that is a stupid criticism
Presumably, you had people come in and read the script. I would turn Idris away if he performed better than the other would be gunslingers because of his complexion.
Then you're entirely defending your garbage taste. It didn't work. Full stop.
let me fuck BDH as punishment!
I'd just specifically call whites.
Kid goes on an adventure, meets muties meets MiB meets billy bumblers, gets a four barrel pistol and remembers the face of his father, it's good
Hollywood can't even adapt a story that's already written down for them anymore.
Yes of course it is resolved. Then rather than continue in this strange and wondrous world, we embark on an incredibly uninteresting side story.
>Not casting the Texan as the cowboy and the brit as the villain
I wouldn't even hesitate. Even assuming he did better, which judging by his performance, he didn't.
>prove it's not just racism
>by calling another black character an Uncle Tom
Think about what "Uncle Tom" means and why the greentext is fucking retarded
I've read that they casted McConaughey as Roland, but he liked Randall and picked that instead after the casting
>Uninteresting
For you
>my opinion is worth more than yours
>it's also objectively true
>samefagging
She sees one other black person and immediately turns on him and you wouldn't think that means her hatred isn't just aimed at whites? Just admit that your argument is fucked.
OPIE LAMENTS
My taste is obviously better than yours and the failure of this garbage movie supports this.
The movie didn't work. Idris Elba did a great job with what he had to work with
>all the seething libtards ITT
Take the L and have sex. Your racebait flick was shit and it failed in every way.
He phoned it right the fuck in, m8.
I'd take the better actor every day of the week. The whole movie was a mess a bore little resemblance to the books.
Failure is the new success
>implying I'm the one you were arguing with about the merits of the film
I just chimed in with the image because I hate this pretend argument you're leading.
To your point, the casting was literally not an issue for the majority of people, they disliked the film (and it failed) for other reasons, from what I can tell. But then again I have probably spend less time figuring out why this film wasn't a success than you have, as you seem to know a fuckload about it.
>turning on the man who invaded your mind and kidnapped you
Oh no! What will the audience think!
>Idris Elba did a great job with what he had to work with
Then you've never seen him actually act.
The majority of people didn't even watch it at all.
look at it this way, in like 20 years someone might give it another go and just do a faithful adaptation.
The majority didnt make it past the youtube trailer.
Be a member of the tribe and you're halfway there already
I'd argue (and this is difficult to prove, I know, I'm not going to try) that was not due to the ethnicity of Roland, who the majority of viewers were probably not familiar with.
In 20 years we might even be out of our current cultural holding pattern and someone might create something new.
Black Cowboy Movie is kind of a turn off without Tarantino's name attached to it. Name one western with a black protagonist post-Django Unchained that financially succeeded.
On the contrary - no one can really accept a black man as a cowboy. Unless it's a joke like in Blazing Saddles.
in the first book alone, roland sticks his gun in a woman's pussy and aborts her baby, then kills an entire town up to and including several children and the woman he'd woken up beside that morning, then rescues, travels with, and becomes a father figure to an orphaned kid from another dimension before intentionally dropping that kid down a bottomless chasm to further his own goals, and the suits in shittywood decided to make the movie pg13 adventure popcorn trash
Yeah, I know right? It's only sold like 30 million copies.
With a diversity hire to try to force the critics to like it on top of that. What a shitshow.
Magnificent Seven bombed as well, and it had Denzel and Pratt.
Interesting, I never thought about it that way. Racism really doesn't interest me at all as a European in an educated environment.
I'm instantly reminded of the opening of "Once Upon a Time in the West", where one of the bad guys is black, but the only decent answer I can give is that I can't name a single western that succeeded financially post Django regardless of ethnicity.
Holy shit, you're annoying and stupid. Go fuck yourself.
Carice van Houten's tits.
I love those tits, and the woman they're attached to.
I pity Europe if you're one of their educated examples. The Revanent is a western that made bank post-Django, and DiCaprio isn't black last time I checked.
YA NO FAWKIN CAWP
No that was a northern. It took place nowhere near the West.
It is considered a Western film objectively. Look it up.
Don't worry, I'm not an example of anything, I'm just fortunate enough to have a decent environment. Doesn't stop me from spending time reading the worthless opinions of literal whos on an anonymous Tajik racing pigeon board.
Good example, I wasn't implying there weren't any successful westerns, I just couldn't list any as it's not a genre I actively follow. I didn't remember Revenant because I haven't watched it, I dislike oscar bait and have no particular sympathy towards DiCaprio.
Not a movie but Red Dead Redemption 2 is the most profitable western ever made in any format.
Rockstar has done a lot of things right lately, still making a shitload of money off of GTA V online content, which was originally released in fucking 2013.
>best selling western ever made is a video game
Will Yea Forums ever win?
Why are western games almost always great?
>mfw I'm literally playing it right now
They could have adapted the first book for less than 50mil instead of whatever the fuck it is they did
>Not sure if they followed the book
They did but they also expanded the back story a bit. The comics were really carried by the art though in my opinion
Only somebody like Zahler would have the balls to make it happen. Crazy bastard stuffed a .45 in a cult leader's fat cunt and shot her unborn hellspawn with it. And then killed everyone in town.
Because gameplay allows the otherwise monotone solitary experience that we want to be the cliche for western genre media. A lot of other good games have similarly "western" pacing, even when neither setting nor time period are even remotely connected.
Good answer. I definitely see the logic.
No.
He said recently. Her great tits are older than all the zoomies here.
PC Version WHEN
Never.
This makes no sense, the only reason Jake is alive in the 3rd novel is because Roland killed the 3rd guy.
>nigger Roland
not my Roland
also
>7 epic long-winded books condensed into one short movie
>wtf why does it suck
What a fascinating story. Say what you will about Kevin Smith, he sure knows how to tell a story and keep you engaged.
>Reminder this was the only nigger in the original Dark Tower.
I always pictured Goggins as Eddie.
Eddie, Odetta, Jake and Oi ruined the dark tower. Once they joined the series went to shit. 2 first volumes were the best.
God dammit I miss my youth and the way things were, when Stephen King gave no fucks, and people weren’t spineless fucks afraid to be disliked on social media.
3rd book had good imagery.
Good.
t. PC
Wrong user, that poster was a faggot. Russians are not faggots.
That is interesting as hell
why do you motherfuckers always forget about /ourguy/ to play Roland? Literally perfect.
I'm a libtard and even I didn't like it or expect it to be good. I'm not a fan of whitewashing, nor am I a fan of blackwashing.
Fucking idiots. "Let's make it a pg-13 adventure romp." I mean, who the fuck reads the series and immediately thinks that Jake's story is better than Rolands?
also, what the fuck...it's not a horror story..
Not him but two is my favorite, so if say 2>1>3=4, didn't mind 5 just because of the batshit craziness of it, but I get the last two confused allot and didn't particularly care for them. I did like 8, though, as a kinda standalone thing
agreed. i wanted him to be Roland so bad.
I think they made the right choice choosing that bbc over any feeble white boi
Is that the cook that gets hanged?
> this was actually my favorite book
I don't know why but "Seven Samurai scenarios" is my favorite thing ever.
This cunt director literally told dark tower fans to "fuck themselves" because people were angry they casted Idris Elba as Roland. Now he says "we could not do it". Fuck you, fuck Hollywood and specially fuck Stephen King for greenlighting this abomination
vigo could always play the rugged vagabond
he can go farther than you'd probably want him to be desu
he does look like a pretty good fit desu.
user you nailed it. A lot of people hate book 4. but the tragedy of it and finding about Rolands crew. Cuthbert and Alain, and the bar scene with the villains just leading up to it was fucking gold.
lmao
r*ssians are most definitely faggots
is the trilogy scrapped then?
Will we get mconohey in The Stand?
Then you're not one of the libtards who were seething ITT
That's not the reason I didn't watch it.
We're so terrible you can't stop thinking about us. :)
Not bad at all, especially because it's their younger version.
>is the trilogy scrapped then?
Practically by design.
>uninteresting
Imagine having such shit taste
Boss nigger
>darker
you mean like your main fucking character?
>army of Doctor Doom robots wielding lightsabers and golden snitches
It could work in film, but you need to do it a bit different. Like, not a carbon copy of Doctor Doom's suit, but something that looks like Doctor Doom suit made by someone who never saw actual Doctor Doom's picture. Not a lightsaber, but more of an "idea" of a lightsaber, some sort of terrifying close combat plasma weapon.
Giant spiders are based though.
Zoe Saldana. She's clearly got a white boy fetish too, so I could see her and Eddie hooking up.
It isn't a straight horror story either, Ron, you idiot.
That is literally how the wolves are described. The Doom masks are wolf faces, etc. Little differences.
The whole point is that it's literally lightsabers and dr doom masks and snitches. It's some bullshit "all fictional worlds are real" trash.
>poor Americans. They're so childish and simplistic they make everything they touch turn to shit
Is that why you cucks use our websites like Yea Forums and literally every other website on the Internet worth using and still constantly complain about Americans, instead of just using your own supposedly superior European equivalents of our websites?
>It's some bullshit "all fictional worlds are real" trash.
Actually it was just the creators of those weapons, north central positronics or whatever, being huge fucking reddit nerds that took their inspo from pop culture.
They're not actutal lightsabers, the snitches are grenades called "harry potter model grenade".
We'll have gays and trans now replacing the main roles.
Yeah I'm sure Luria would be a studio executive if he were alive today
more like North Central POZZitronics amirite
>North Central Positronics
What was their problem, anyway?
lmao. the character is literally based on clint eastwood. he's a cowboy and a knight rolled into one. these are western archetypes. it just doesn't work when he's black. stop being such a tryhard faggot.
I thought book 1 was weak, there I said it. It functions as a introduction of the world but not much else, it's very shallow.
>She was portrayed as evil though. She was the good nigress' evil split personality.
I wouldnt' say evil per se, more like dragging a ultra rabid dog with cunning intelligence along with you to use when it's necessary but you have to be careful it doesn't attack you when your back is turned
not evil, just fucked up in the head
Like gollum/smeagol.
Remember Detta was the only one that could tolerate being raped by an incubus and survive, odetta couldn't handle it, she was already too broken
(though you can't rape the willing)
Every time good, poor crippled negro girl couldn't handle anything detta swoops in and takes control and gets shit done
eg) when they're fighting against the robo-bear whose brain rotted and detta blasts that honky mofah whiteboi's brains out with a hand cannon whilst riding roland's shoulders.