Britain's Got Talent /BGT/ Live Final
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it's time for the shitfest lads
Cant wait for 5 magic acts
the fact X is obviously an overweight middle aged woman is hilarious
First for kojo
Who's gonna win lads? I'd say the psychic dog, the old geezer or the primary school as the top three. Though that magician chap could be a dark horse (not X, the other fella)
Looking forward to X's next trick, causing Alicia to miscarry.
>"Alicia. Can you feel your baby kicking?"
>N-No."
*Audience applause.
Fucking hell that's dark. But I'd vote for that.
linking related digital spy thread for normie opinions:
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>If Colin wins he can spend £250,000 every year for life.
Who would you rather shag lads, Alicia or Amanda?
Memehern.
Amanda. Alicia does my nut in.
Now that I think about it, Amanda. I know Aleesha's like ten years younger than her but good lord she must have had some dodgy work done, her neck looks fucking horrendous now.
YEAH YOU AND ME WE CAN LIGHT UP THE SKYYY
This show really looks like something from Idiocracy. You have these big loud buzzers to say "me no likey" and the acts that actually get through, oh god. You might laugh at the show but the fact that this is how normies think is worrying. These people outnumber you.
Where my Busted bros at?
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>Cauliflower Popcorn
Fucking vegan scum. Eat Popcorn Chicken like a human being.
The seething at the kids performance is hilarious. How can't you get so mad at this shite
It's the same trick done in different ways
I say that kids band win it
scuffed dynamo
>Flakefleet Primary School for the win!
Based and dare I say it, pretty fine!
This is gay.
poo in loo
Yawn
>Indian grandad
Oh that explains it. I though there was something off about him.
His grandad made his virginity disappear.
That's why he's such a faggot.
plastic amanda saying is that it ?
What the hell was that?
have they buzzed anyone during the semi finals? reckon jeremy kyle has made it so they cant.
Only Big Bantz Simon has.
how long did he have to put on a great show?
fucking mini cards. really.
get out. bring out the guy to get get shot with crossbows again
Lol putting small cards into his pocket in the least subtle way possible
wow he got a pair of cards out of a cracker from his pocket, what a mad trick lad
I stopped watching this year after the 4th audition week, did it get any better?
The final line-up isn't too bad considering some of the absolute shit that made it to the semis.
dance kids!!
these guys will be on next season of strictly soon
cringe kids , hope they break their legs
X should do it.
Absolute shit so far, as expected
Are you serious? The fucking dog magic shite is in but the stunt magic, John Archer and Graham who are much better are not. Fuck off.
Dynamo is part paki as well isn’t he?
that scouse ewww
It's nice of you to wish them luck
Wew lad
I thought that this was supposed to be a variety show
hard to follow up on the royal variety now that Meghan has had hers.
Dancing kids need to win it. Only actual talent on this God forsaken, over produced show.
Shut the fuck up, the dog is based you Paki cunt.
Baby spice face in crisp advert , gruesome ,
Harry Potter cunts
Spot the Jew in this magic troupe
can we get a count of how many packs of cards come out tonight?
The little speccy twat right.
briefcase wankers
...
That was garbage.
Amanda needs BBC
I think so.
They were utter shite weren't they
>BOOOOOOOO! BOOOOOOOO SIMON!!! YOU. ARE. VOLDERMORT!
Oh dear god here we go again...
fucking snooze fest fucking hell
It's not fair that this guy has gotten so far considering his brother won last year, give someone else a chance lad.
Trips for cunny to win
This singer took the place of a real entertainer
Now we have to sit here and listen to some miserable shit. No wonder his brother is a retard could you imagine listening to this depressing dribble all day everyday?
keks
wonder if he is a prop for hire
Spastics should be euthanized.
kek
Wait, people watch this shit, in the current year? Fuck me, imagine giving Cowell ratings in this day and age.
No l. He has Crohn's, that's why he's that dirty yellow colour that makes you think he's Arab/Indian.
Gave me a nice chuckle, lad.
Is AGT or any of the other countries any better? What about Ireland's show?
Who hyped for Rolling In It and BGT Champions?
I just checked his wiki, his Dad is an Afghan.
AGT is basically Mexico has talent at this point
At least we got something back from a decade long war
John Archer or Graeme Matthews?
>britain's got sob stories and vague talents
Old fucker is gonna win, shit's fixed from the start
Are you ready to watch a man die live on TV?
worst thing about this guy is there's no chance of him dying since it's all just tricks that he pretends are real and dangerous
*hits pipe*
an hero brilliant backtrace dad
Oh... FUCK OFF!
cute loli.
That kid will be a fucking train wreck alcoholic if this goes wrong
Why the fuck is his daughter American?
>Hey daddy
hnnnng
>Trusting a nigress to set you up for a buried alive stunt
Wew lad good luck
Ooo... Bianca's back.
Ireland show is dogshit don't bother
What's wrong with Cheryl Cole's face?
>Didn't die
2/10
It doesn't have my balls on it.
>I have seen these acts go wrong.
Oh pray tell, Simon.
He was talking about the mini cards guy.
>t. someone who didn't watch him hang himself and drown in a canal lock.
A lot of his earlier stuff he failed as well but they were just dumb thing like the iron on the bedsheet and being naked in the lift.
1 Direction
you really think they'd let him go on live TV with a dangerous act? how naive
Fat NORFERNER incoming
Shove on Phillips
Oh yay it's the fat unfunny cunt
I missed antiques roadshow for this shit
>unfunny fat bitch victoria wood wannabe
Based chubby mummy
win or lose she'll be doing the Christmas light switch on somewhere
>Screen cap this
Eat shit and die you fucking hambeast.
Haha this fatarse
>Moans about not having a man
>Has a child
What did she mean by this?
They actually prevented an act from performing in the semi final because the act didn't meet safety regulations. Clearly his act was low risk.
DIE!!!!!!!!!!
Muh steakbakes
wearing same dress dirty fat cunt
////S
////H
SHITE.
////T
////E
This single mum going on about how she can’t get a man is the funniest joke so far.
Whenever I hear a song start with a jaunty piano tune like that all I can think of is Coach McGuirk from Home Movies in the musical episode.
A-Anyone else? Just me? alri
Yes and no. If he can prove to them he's not going to die then they'll let him do it. He's a professional escapologist and can pick those locks in less than a minute, so him staying under was showmanship like you said but it's still dangerous and not a "trick" in that sense.
The crossbows were more dangerous because he could have easily missed the mark with the photo of David whilst blindfolded.
Honestly on this phat as fuck comedown, the only ones been good so far are the dog magician and David’s golden buzzer
This fat cunt can fuck off
C-chord
D-chord
C-chord
D-chord
C-chord
D-chord
C-chord
D-chord
C-chord
D-chord
C-chord
D-chord
> tfw she says cake for the 866th time
Because those guys were amateur and didn't have years of experience to prove to the producers they could be trusted, so not worth the risk. Jonathan Goodwin has been doing stuff like this for decades.
you realise the bolts arnt dangerous? even if he got hit they would have bounced off him
What the fuck you daft cunt they were both 2 of the worst before this fat piece of garbage rolled on.
Mulhern is X?
Oh yay time for some cringe
>inspiring and inspirational
X GON GIVE IT TO YA
none of these are good
at least the two I mentioned have heart and happiness
That bald faggot was chained up looser than your ma's vag. No way was he dying on stage. Shill begone.
Would they? They went at least an inch into solid wood. What's the comparison between wood and flesh?
>trained actors do thing
>wow look they did thing
190 is X?
It's lucky Ant sorted his shit out or X would be fucked this series
Susan Boyle is X lads, trying to win for good
While waiting for this shit to end, let's watch some Bant & Kek kino.
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Fucking manlet convention going on up there
who
literally who?
Who
I've literally seen this trick on a Facebook magic post for boomers.
WHo?
Cringe cancer sobstory guy from last year
What the fuck? I don't even remember this guy. I thought we were gonna see Stayvun?
Haven’t watched any of this. What’s going on with this weird prick.
Also what is that degenerate ant doing back on my tv. Fucking druggy mental midget.
X was inside of us all along?
No idea who that is lol
Now that he's revealed himself interest in him will go to 0
>Thank goodness it wasn't Stephen Mulhern.
Fuck you, David.
Yeah and like I said he could pick those locks in the time it took for the gravel to get up to his knees and it probably wasn't 1T. It's showmanship but that doesn't disqualify it from being dangerous.
wot
Alright Steven how you doing mate?
Ant & Dec were always in on it.
I know its to be expected at this point but GOOD LORD the "people" of the BGT audience are the epitome of NPC. I could watch that entire studio explode.
X is X?
Ah I vaguely remember now
Has X stolen victory from that old cunt?
unfunny nignog
Yes it does. It's not dangerous to stand in a box and pull a rope with some gravel falling on you.
Who is the magical faggot??
Alri bruv I'm Jojo Anime are you ready for me to say "ladies and gentlemen" 10 times in a row?
Cojo bumakakumhajama
Fuck this i'm going for a walk
Hope he makes some saville jokes
>alesha's unfunny best mate kojo
Not fixed at all
X-X-EKKUSU!
Doubt it, he will be "performing" last to get maximum vote manipulation.
Here comes the nog king
le based black man
WE WUZ COMEDIENS N SHEEEIT
You missed a trick there didn't you all those years of magic and you could've been on a real TV show
Lmaoing at this nigger
Tux with Vans. Based zoomer!
70s old jokes again
Damn I actually wish he would insult white people and talk about his strict African parents.
This is shit.
Sneed's Snickers (formerly Chuck's Marathon)
Comedy is 50 material and 50 repetition of that material slightly louder the second time
Not funny
>no laughter
bombing hard even with this npc audience
AY YO WHITEY LOL
>I actually wish he would insult white people
I know right he's such an Uncle Tom.
No Richard Pryor
Ahahaha, just like a young Lenny Henry. Unfunny as fuck.
>Come to my church!
>My choir is the one that sings on every advert since hey did the royal wedding
Funny Snigger.
I've noticed David, the comedy judge, is usually only smiling politely when Kojo is on as opposed to actually laughing.
NPCs stand up for the token Darkie
that was absolutely dire, he should be ashamed to call himself a comedian
kek
EY YO
WHY PIPO BE LIKE THIS
>*nerdy geek noises*
WHILE BLACK PIPO BE LIKE THIS
>*Cool sexy noises*
Named Marc Spellmann, he was on last year
Simon is so numb from a lifetime of watching trash he actually thought this guy was good.
>Last time I eat a Marathon bar Simons face wasn’t made out of rubber.
Fucking hell Kojo, that’s a bit much.
Remember when Cif was called Jif haha
>Ladies and gentlemen
>Ladies and gentlemen
>Ladies and gentlemen
>Ladies and gentlemen
Is he doing a fucking comedy act or trying to promote George Michael's best of album?
Turkey neck wants some BBC
simon is a fucking NPC
funnier than his whole set
fair lplay to him getting through two years running he might actually be good.
Remember when Sneed's was called Chuck's haha
Based Ant and Dec warning Simon to hide his wallet.
Saggy balls up next
>remember when this thing used to be called something else?
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
The brexit vote is up next. Just off me now.
hope the old cunt snuffs it
I don't get it
only entertaining thing that could happen is if Colin slips this mortal coil mid-song
last year he sob storied his way through
this year he mystery gimmicked his way through
Remember when 4channel was called Yea Forums haha
After the break:
>Remember what your elders did for you
>You'd be talking German if it weren't for them
>Such sacrifice
>Better world for everyone
>Thanks to people like you
>we'll meet again
>The youth of today could learn a thing or two
What are the odds he even makes it to the Royal Variety after he's won?
In the show where they declared who was going through and one of the "Queen's" butler's showed up in her stead I legit thought it was someone from Chelsea Hospital saying he'd died.
No. I'm new.
Oh shit boys it's /lig/ tomoz
Oh look it's Richard "Support the Troops" Jones back again, bloody hell he's aged. Nick Knowles will vote for him.
Next year he'll have transitioned fully and will be a one woman burlesque dance act
All of our WW2 vets are dead now and he's too old for Iraq/Afghanistan. Where did he actually serve?
>make him last to be freshest in memory for the ADHD public
>judges gush about how he should win and everyone should totally vote for him
>literally single handedly saved the world from the nazis
>and btw votes are open now
Holy fuck who let all the zoomer fucktards in.
They can just get him stuffed and prop him up on stage with the radio playing.
cant want until that generation die off so they can stop being wheeled onto shit like this every fucking year
Based Tyson Fury bro is gonna smash some slags like Adam.
War never ends user
>saving private ryan graveyard music
what did they mean by this?
Band of Brothers tune
never fought in any real wars
I'm actually gonna vote to stop this old cunt winning.
>Sings about love
>Wearing medals for killing people and waging war.
They was the last good generation tbqh
This is what they fought for. So his offspring could be Chink insects.
Silly old cunt.
Haha look at this old bastard
iirc he's too young to have been in WW2 but he served in Korea.
Looking at his medals he's got Northern Ireland on there so he got shot at by gypos for a bit. Maybe he's Soldier F.
>Colin rains opium poppies down on the audience to get them high and vote for him
Bloody hell i feel like i have to go die for Israel now.
Thanks Simon Cowell
This is USA tier cringe.
Colin loses to Kojo fucking when
Maybe he just bought em on eBay and never actually seved.
Who do we vote for? Who has a realistic chance of beating old man?
>All of our WW2 vets are dead now
No they're not brainlet, that's WW1
Fuck off China is awesome. They treat their people like dogs and their dogs like food. They don't give a fuck, and will rule the world because of it. We need Trump to start treating the negros and libcucks like that, and put them to work on farms. The illegals can be killed and process into a high protein paste, that will be fed to the workers. All non white babies will be aborted and turned into protein paste until the UK is 99 percent white again. Don't like the new laws? Protein paste. Don't like Trump? Protein paste. Mad at the whites? You better believe you're getting made into protein paste.
X GON' GIVE IT TO YA.
Queen would probably enjoy this most.
LEARSI ROF EID
Did that sound funny in your head or something?
Shut up insect
you arent going to get to sing to the queen anyway you deluded bastard she never turns up to the royal variety
>I've to sing for the Queen I've served would be the end, I could die happy.
Oh boy here we go...
who cares?
THE WW2 generation will al be gone in 10 years
I fucking loved that act
cute loli to win
>That young mulatto around his arm.
Phwoar, our Colin's quite the colonizer isn't he.
t. Protein paste
I didn't watch the school kids one but holy shit that sounded awful.
>people hating on ww2 vets
What the fuck? Are you all muzzies or poo in loo?? Have some respect zoomer fucks. You non nationalist faggots are why the country is such a cucked mess to begin with.
Kys
Got all my house to vote X
and that wasn't even live, only like two of them have mics, the rest was pre-recorded
The right really can't meme.
Missed lost of this. What’s with all the magic?
Hey David *wink* Think of someone you have a close connection with *wink* And we'll try to guess who it is *wink*
Dude it's magic lmao
X to win
The guy was about 8 when WW2 started
Based cunnyseur
Just given my five votes to Colin. Angry goatfuckers in 3, 2, 1...
Escapist was good
X was good
Ben Hart good
>ww2 vets
Fuck off he wasn't anywhere near ww2
Absolutely fucking based.
Fucking hell did the cringe children advert have an entry?
fucking state of the old guy's goblino grandkids
at least we're not speaking german though eh
It’s their fault this country is the way it is. We should have joined Hitler when we had the chance.
>a tripfag is pretending anyone gives a fuck again
God you're pathetic
He fought in the Falklands idiot
5 votes for X.
Gotta beat the old cunt.
So who actually is /OurEntry/ this year lads? Who are we rooting for here?
Hahaha look at the ''''charity'''' the money from voting goes to:
The Royal Variety Charity is a British charity based in Twickenham, Middlesex, England. It is dedicated to giving support to those who have professionally served the entertainment industry
When he was like 50-60? Don't think so mate.
Damn that little nigga from diversity ain’t a little nigga anymore and looks like a anime villain.
BASED
the three magic tricks that are done on bgt
>pick a card and I'll guess it in a dull way
>pick a piece of paper and I'll guess what it said
>think of a word and I'll guess what it is
This. If you're gonna hate on vets, hate on the cuckolds who've been farting around going all pally with sandniggers in Iraq and Afghanistan while doing nothing to protect the white children who have been raped by shitskin scum across this country.
In retrospect, WW2 was where it all went wrong but it all started as a sequel to the war of empires which was WW1. The lads really did think they were saving their country back in the day.
X
This. It’s sickening.
Diversity is the only good act that ever came out of this show and they full well know it too
>DURR I'M A SURVIVOR
This is the fourth fucking time this shit has played this week btw
How many of these fucking Diversity pubeheads are there now? In 2009 there was only the one.
holy shit that was actually world class
This program is what I imagine a Butlins holiday feels like.
I am certain that if Diversity came on the show this year or last year they wouldn't win. 2009 was the last time the show was good.
It is
Did X do anything other than the grid trick?
The big reveal, that's it.
Lads check out the BGT app, Mulhern finally got his own buzzer!
This phat comedown is intense
Took his onions respirator off.
Based
11th 4MG
10th Libby and Charlie
9th Dave and Finn
8th Piano Woman
7th Dangerous guy
6th Card Trick
5th X
4th Singer
3rd Primary School
Runner-Up Kojo
Winner Colin Thackery
I'm probably completely wrong and didn't see them all but fuck it
EVERY FUCKING NIGHT I LIE IN BED
OFF KEY LOL
what happened to Susan's voice?
IS THIS THE FUCKING GREATEST SHOWMAN AGAIN
I AM SO FUCKING TIRED OF THIS SHIT, IT'S BEEN OVER A YEAR, LET IT FUCKING DIE
SUSAN BOYLE in for the kill on this song hahahahahahahaahahahahahahahha
And out of time
actually cringe
no one wants to clap for them
The judges will be forced to say something nice
Who said this show was shit
He is wearing a South Atlantic service medal but he was Not there when it was active , the most he feared was an angry pingu .
>the mediocrest showman
Based Mulhern lining them up
Is Susan doped up?
NEW THREAD
>Just use the mic for us
Fuck off Declan, SuBo's a legend, what have you done in the last ten years, host ITV's Red or Black? As if like, get fucked
Will be funny if fat unfunny twat won
Shes been a recluse for years after she got bullied in millionaire row she moved to.
She's a diagnosed autist
diagnosed my prostate cancer