Can't get it up with a black chick

Fuck you I cum in the sink all the time

T. Woman

Actually t. Porn addict. I literally had a girl tell me to take my pants off and fuck her a few months ago, I just said no and went home and jacked off.

degens gonna degen

hottest actress in the movie

Attached: Shame-hargreaves-hd-01-hd.webm (800x450, 2.86M)

>when you have the stroke game of a man with a 4 inch cock

Attached: 111111122241525256.png (616x600, 342K)

Clean up is so fucking easy. And no smell.

nice body

Attached: Shame-hargreaves-hd-01-hd2.webm (800x450, 2.82M)

oh noooooo he has lots of sex :(

have sex

She was 41 during the filming

>now if all women took care of their bodies like this

Just cum in the toilet and flush it you goon

I don't get it, she looks like shit is this some kind of joke?

>tfw

Attached: rosamund pike gone girl-3.webm (1280x532, 2.99M)

t. niggerlover

uhh, no?

is this have sex the thread?

Just cum in the toilet, Jesus. You even get to sit down

More like an anti have sex thread. Sex nearly ruined this guy's life. Or did eventually. Dude had like a six figure job and got caught with porn on his work computer, somehow didn't get fired.

That actress is hot AF but she literally has no soul.

Am I the only one who was pissed because she refused to go nude for this movie?

really detracted from the experience

Nice double dubs, and I think that was the point in Gone Girl.

Attached: rosamund pike gone girl4.webm (1280x532, 2.99M)

Yeah, nobody else gets their rocks off seeing an actress degrade herself on screen

>You even get to sit down
dicklet detected
i gotta bend that fucker to get around the seat and also itll touch the inside of the bowl
what are you, less or at 5"?

>somehow didn't get fired
people who have sex don't get fired buddy. have sex

He didn't get fired mostly because his boss was porking his sister so I guess you're right

Why is she so hot here?

He didn't get fired cuz it's just a little cheeky porno on the company computer. Literally only a woman would fire somebody for that

nymphomaniac is have sex holy grail

>He doesn't cum even harder when he thinks about all the DNA of dozens of people on the toilet rubbing all over your hard cock

Sort of, her half nude scenes were still great jerk off material though. Lady has a great fucking body.

16cm but it should be easy as fuck to bend your penis down to point into the bowl and not touch it my man

Attached: 1550528218913.webm (1280x720, 2.05M)

>>when you have the stroke game of a man with a 4 inch cock
Fassbender is 4" flaccid. There's one scene where his dick is swinging wildly as walks to check his phone messages.

Attached: 1550290108467.webm (1280x720, 2.72M)

I've cum in the sink at work a few times, it's perfect height to do so

My favorite ending of all time

Attached: 1550527011289.webm (1694x720, 1.78M)

Is this the ending scene or when he sees her with a ring at the beginning? She's cute as fuck but he totally slammed that. The cut to credits is up for you to decide but nah, he went for that sweet red carpet.

SUCCESSFUL MAN SAD
DONT YOU FEEL BAD?

>shes married and is still gonna cheat

Most believable part of the clip

the truth.

dude...

It's this oneI could go into detail as to why I love the ending so much but essentially it's just the transformation from wanting but scared to being at his level. Good shit

McQueen is highly underrated

This is actually true but the HR cartel has most company's balls in a vicegrip. A man would likely tell you to keep that shit at home you fucking retard and be done with it.

Pleb

Women love confidence and a bit of bravado. Of course it helps if you're somewhat good looking and not some hideous beast. Combine these things and you'll sex it up in no time.

Attached: 1471314927617.webm (960x540, 2.92M)

>wins an oscar
>underrated

From this scene with no context it looks like he wont fuck her and that gives me peace of mind.

>for his least interesting film
UNDERRATED

>tfw 1.5" flaccid but 7" bone pressed ( I consider it sort of a cheat even though it's used as a consistent measuring convention)
>tfw girls don't understand the concept of an erection
>tfw too girthy to maintain a solid erection
I should pribably do some cardio

I think once your film wins best picture you can't call yourself underrated anymore, bub

I bet he did. Right before the credits appear there's this look of resignation, falling back into his old ways (which really aren't that old considering the timeframe of the movie)

As a director? Because his acting career is very highly rated IMO

>I can't stop putting my massive cock in beautiful women I'm so depressed

Attached: 1556881495851.png (644x800, 15K)

The implication isn't that she wants to fuck him, just that she finds the whole thing exciting despite her engagement. In other words, intimacy and love isn't enough and he's existentially fucked.

>I'm too much of a zoomer to know that success and wealth are just as trying as poverty and failure

>I have to identify with the character to enjoy the movie!

I also like his sun glasses

Literally me. Porn broke me and I don't know how to fix myself. Nofap scares me because a few days in my dick looks shrunk dead and useless, almost numb like when you're drunk so I tell myself I'll just have a quick dutiful fap but descend into the depths of degeneracy and binging for 6 hours once again.

me? I like his ranch dressing

Holy fuck me too

He totally fucking did. But it doesn't really matter, what matters is what you take from it as a viewer. He knows she wants it this time, she even dolled up a bit for him. The first time she was uncomfortable about it but you know she was shlicking herself every day thinking about what could've happened. Now she was dtf.

What's scary is that after all he'd been through with his addiction, when it's freely presented to him, and something he didn't get the first time at that, will he succumb? Would you? Any addiction, not just cute as fuck grills you see on the subway.

Women like sex get over it you virgin

>she even dolled up a bit for him
Okay Yea Forums answer me this once and for all: Do you prefer """"""dolled up""""""" women? She looks way cuter with less makeup, nothing is more retarded than bright red lipstick

Not really cuz it makes most women look like whores or clowns, but a little pink lipstick sometimes looks cute

>which really aren't that old considering the timeframe of the movie

This too. A lot of people buy a pack of cigarettes and dramatically throw them in the trash, delete their porn drive or flush their pills down the toilet in a "this is it, I'm done" moment, but 2 days later when the drama's gone?

Last time a girl liked me I didn't jerk off or even feel like masturbating at all.

why se wears two rings first and then only one ring?

Fuck off normalfag

Yes, that's what I said. In my own way I was referring to Kierkegaard's thesis in Sickness Unto Death where he argues that the stability provided by marriage and romance are mutually exclusive but that they heart craves both putting people in an impossible situation whereby there is no good outcome. It's more or less the conclusion of the film. Have sex.

I HATE makeup. It ruins their skin. Last week at work an intern showed up with no makeup and I was about to introduce myself before I realized I'd met her before. I had no idea who she was, and she looked cuter too.

That's perfect user, I would have said the exact same thing if I didn't feel so lazy right now.
>you know she was shlicking herself every day thinking about what could've happened
She looked like she was about to on the subway. I love that look of sudden disgust. DAMMIT it's just such a great scene. That music, that hunger. I've never seen something like that in film. Fuck it makes me horny.

youtube.com/watch?v=ErOQtiFLhvE

First girl since highschool to take a liking to me in 8 years and still a virgin, fuck off nerd.

I can't even count the amount of times I've deleted all my porn. Gets worse every time I relapse.

please, tell me about what else you've read someone else say. fascinating

I don't understand how anyone gets intimate with a girl they already know or meet somewhere
I can understand pulling drunk club sluts or having proper dates from internet dating but how in the fuck do you even flirt with a woman? My friend told me to just start by complimenting their clothes or something and I can't even do that
Friends with benefits are even weirder, how do those guys tell a friend they wanna fuck her?
Beep boop I don't understand human relationships

I'm not smarter than Kierkegaard. Maybe read that instead. Or any book that doesn't have pictures in it. And then have sex.

What's "human" about acting like an animal and masturbating with another person's body? Are you stupid, or do you not see that that is the abnormal thing

>why se wears two rings first and then only one ring?
She took it off hoping he would notice that she's married but still down to fuck.

If you have nothing to contribute besides sparknotes from books you don't understand then you shouldn't be commenting. We've all read Kierkegaard anyway, pewdiepie recommended him

Don't say too much, don't try to be funny. Don't make a lot of movement but stay loose and relaxed. Don't seem like you want it too bad. Be subtle. "How's your day going so far?" is a decent starter. Treat the conversation as if it's no big deal but not in a "I don't give a fuck" type way. If you ask how they're doing and you only get a one or two word response, shut it down and move on with your life.

that much is certain

Attached: 1548394606662.jpg (1224x1505, 234K)

Do you comprehend how much you just weakened your point just by admitting to knowing that?

>We've all read Kierkegaard anyway, pewdiepie recommended him

Attached: 152635724573468.gif (257x200, 1.24M)

I don't watch pewdiepie, I'm not a twelve year old. If I've misunderstood in my comparison to the film then please clarify how. Then have sex.

Yes, I talk to women exactly like I talk to men. This serves to make acquaintances or talk to that qt at work without spilling my spaghetti
Still no idea how to flirt, my man

Hol' up is 4" flaccid good? I'm roughly 3.5" flaccid and 6.5" erect. Girth is 6"

>I talk to women exactly like I talk to men
Big mistake

So you're telling me you aren't "loose and relaxed" when you talk to men and ask them how their day is going?

unironically the two best actors today
brabo mcqueen

Lmao shut up boomer

What youtube videos I watch has no bearing on my point, if you think it does then you don't seem to realize how weak that makes your point

What comparison to the film? If I wanted to know what you think of a movie, I'll just go to the source and read Kierkegaard, why do I need to filter him through you, a man who admitted to being stupider than a 300 year old german book writer

Bone pressed is the right way because if you go all in the fat pad will get pressed on giving you that length.

>What youtube videos I watch has no bearing on my point
No one gives a fuck. You're not a person anyone can take seriously now

Your petty attempt at character assassination is not as effective as you think it is

But both of them are more or less forgotten about. Which is a shame as they're both very good.

Attached: fish tank michael fassbender.jpg (2700x1800, 317K)

>Hol' up is 4" flaccid good
It absolutely doesn't matter. Women aren't usually turned on by the pure sight of dicks like we're turned on by tits and pussy, but even if you find a slut who is, she sure as hell doesn't care about its flaccid state

This film is unironically pure unaltered kino

Remember when I said you should read the work I was drawing thoughts from? That's because I'm not the filter. Believe it or not, the book is not about his thoughts on the movie, I'm extrapolating some of the logic. Have sex.

No, because I don't care how their day is going because they aren't a woman. I'll ask, but it's different. Act like you care, but don't act like you know them.

Have you ever had a woman like you? Haven't you noticed the difference between the way she talks to you? Makes an effort to look at you. Will say more than two words? It's in the eyes, the voice, the movement, the need to touch you in some way. SUBTLE but also don't assume some girl like you because they say a complete sentence to you. It's in the WAY they do things towards you.

chav kino, along with eden lake.

Attached: Eden Lake.jpg (791x1136, 169K)

this movie was so retarded

>Have you ever had a woman like you?
Come on bro, did you even read my posts?

Attached: 1535309155078.png (335x351, 41K)

Remember when I told you had read the book. You act like Kierkegaard is some obscure author

Here's what your posts amount to
A = quote someone else's book
B = repeat something you've already said without remembering the posts of who you're replying to
C = say a buzzword catchphrase

The first post you made was just an A, this post I'm replying to now is a B, C combo. In a very real sense you are a robot, yet you keep commenting and giving your opinion like its original and worth reading. Don't

He'd be disappointed by her nipples.

It's true. So many men make the mistake of thinking marriage "locks them in in". If you are married or have a long-time GF you still need to romance them like you are first dating.
Otherwise some other guy will romance them that way and even women who don't try to cheat end up cheating.

What are these?

Everyone's a robot m8, giving out responses based on input and internal state

Such is the life of women, and brother-sister relationships.

Attached: doom rosamund pike and karl urban.webm (1054x720, 2.9M)

You're telling me you want to fuck men?

Well, that's plainly not true

You're projecting. I don't think the father of existentialism is obscure and I don't believe you've read shit because you're acting like a child. Grow up and then have sex.

Imagine coming to an imageboard and not being able to read filenames - Fish Tank (2009) and Eden Lake (2008).

You're just rambling now

It's cold on Mars.

I'm actually even stupider than that. I meant to say "what are those about?"

Sorry. I'm trying my best to explain. I'm no pickup artist. The best advice I can give is to start paying attention to the way a woman reacts to you. Start practicing on cashiers or baristas. It's a short window that allows you to gauge how you're coming off. Don't even try to pick anyone up or get a date. Build your confidence up in small steps, which will also help you understand the way a woman interacts.

It doesn't matter if she's a "cool girl" she is still a woman and operates from the same baseline as every other woman.

>playing sisters
>both actors have englishy accents naturally
>both do horrible american accents for the movie
why

Say it ain't so user

Attached: 1554967378772.jpg (415x292, 15K)

>>playing sisters

Attached: 1385334457259.jpg (299x168, 6K)

oh gosh if only :3

Fish Tank is older man and chav girl sex time. Eden Lake is chav horror.

Attached: Fish Tank.jpg (2362x1574, 3.46M)

Black women smell.

The whole point was that he never received love. Then the ending shows a woman who is "in love" but still wants to fuck him.
The entire theme is the separation of love and sex.

Chav horror? Like Last House on the Left in a tracksuit?
Is fishtank good?

Coco butter?

What if it's worse than that? What if excitement is derived from the novelty and the impermanence and it can't be recaptured once you've bought the house and popped out 2.5 kids. What if infidelity is the only way to feel passion again and everyone else has just accepted that part of their life is over.

Just watch them and see for yourself.

Attached: Centurion-michael-fassbender-.jpg (1280x960, 394K)

Not him but fishtank is based, haven't seen the other one

As you say. I'll check it out

Asking a goddamn cashier how her day is going is even worse than complimenting someone's hair at work

Yeah but if you're still chasing 'excitement' and 'passion' after the age of 16 then you're already dead meat

Then you are mentally ill.

>What if infidelity is the only way to feel passion again
It's just sex, jesus. Why are roasties and retarded men so obsessed with cheating?

What? Women love getting complimented, makes their entire fucking day, especially if they haven't gotten one recently.
Can't tell you the amount of times a female family member would come home all giddy about how their new hair received compliments.
They aren't an incel fuck like you who hates when people notices him.

It's literally the most simple question of all time.

"How is your day going?"

"Good, how's yours?"

"Pretty good"

WOW SO HORRIBLY DIFFICULT

>has sex constantly
>dude im so depressed :(

I'm saying worse as in harder to do, friend
>hates when people notices him
Naw I'm fine with attention, I wish I wasn't though, crippling anxiety would be a pretty good excuse for why I suck at social interactions
>>WOW SO HORRIBLY DIFFICULT
It is indeed

The type of sex he was having is something I like to call enhanced masturbation.
It was a step above using a fleshlight.
>fine with attention
>can't handle the simplest of small talk
Someone needs to look in the mirror.

It's literally not if you PRACTICE MOTHER FUCKER

You will get cold responses, many MANY times. Deal with it, it will make you stronger. It's a simple place to start. Keyword there is START

Fassbender starred in too many duds this decade and it sullied his name.

Hollywood action movies don't count against a man's career, everyone has to do one or two

I have no problem with small talk. Read the quote chain, the problem is escalating it to flirting.
I'm just not American. It's not normal to just start talking to random strangers here
I'll stop posting though since you people seem to be stuck in a groove

>duds

Let's all laugh at this pleb.

Attached: 1484009055506.png (502x500, 238K)

>I'll stop posting though since you people seem to be stuck in a groove
I hope you fail every time kek why did I waste words on a fucking retard like you

>no problem with small talk
>can't small talk though
Sounds like you are full of cope.

that snow murder mystery one is a dud assass creed was a dud theres more of course

>that snow murder mystery one is a dud assass creed was a dud theres more of course

What did drunkard user mean by this?

Attached: Michael-Fassbender-Centurion.jpg (2000x1328, 1.04M)

Imagine not wanting to have fun.

cope

>weee, fun! I'm a kid! fun fun fun!

Why do you watch movies or come here?

if I was an actor, no matter how "serious" I was, I'd do a shitty marvel movie if they asked me, or a dumbass magneto movie at least once. that's just a gimme

It's weird because 99% of white men not only don't want to, but find the idea pretty gross.

Like once in a while you find a black dude with the obsession about white guys "taking our women", dude you can have em. Just keep em. Knock yourself out.

I don't watch movies and I don't post here

My mistake. Carry on.

Could it be that you're a woman? You certainly are behaving like one.

I bet you're also the type to suck Jewish cock to get a leg up on your career
not everyone has as low a sense of self-worth as you do

That's not how I read that scene but now that you say it that seems maybe correct. I thought he was just turning it sexual because everything is sexual for him

>get a leg up (on)
>low a sense of self-worth
I'm talking to a eurotard aren't I

>implying that's not correct
American """education"""
go read a dictionary entry

>I use idioms like they're a normal sentence
wow, really am. and there is of course no defending "low a sense of self-worth", yet you appear to be doing just that. ladies and gentlemen, the mind of a eurotard at work. what a marvel

go back to /pol/ and stay there, cletus

Attached: 2019-06-01_19-58-30.png (630x147, 7K)

Cope.

Attached: mel hmmmm2.webm (1280x720, 2.9M)

>>I use idioms like they're a normal sentence

Attached: 1390417107440.jpg (184x184, 9K)

You don't know how women act. Colour me shocked.

The green means I'm quoting the tard like it's something he's saying

Attached: 1351883558059.jpg (404x403, 41K)

You're a retard and in typical euronigger style you don't even realize how retarded you are

I haven't seen the film in a while but if I remember correctly he actually liked the black woman as a person, the white hooker was just a sex object for him to use.

>black woman as a person
I don't understand

I honestly have no idea what you're trying to say, is this English?

did he do it lads?

Most definitely. But maybe she wasn't just a sex toy and he started down the path of recovery.

its propaganda

people fail to quit smoking because they always go “this cigarette here is my last” and then they smoke it. from that moment they instantly fail. they are making excuses and smoking after the making the decision to not smoke. the correct way to do it is go “the last cigarette i smoked was my last”

>muh racism

nobody's buying it

Does the path of recovery start with fucking a married woman?

One way to find out. It certainly starts with feeling something

It's good to set little goals to work off of. I stopped myself from texting a woman I've wanted to fuck for 10 years. Small victory.

Well done user. What's the next step of your master plan?

I've had sex with my cousin but I've never been attracted to my sister.

>I've had sex with my cousin

tell us more.

Attached: helen mirren.webm (866x480, 2.89M)

who fucks like that lmao

Beware of cumming in the sink.
Cum seems to clog up umbing for some reason.
Toilet is fine, but narrower waste pipe seem to clog up much more quickly when you drop loads of semen in them.

Crashing this life

With no relapses

Hoping for the best but expecting the worst