Remember when Amy Schumer was hot?

Imagine marrying an okay looking girl who takes somewhat good care of herself and having her turn into that

Jesus christ

cant say the signs werent there

>mfw this is my life currently.

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This iteration has peaked my interest.

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she looked pretty good im shocked, maybe just in comparison to the photo on the right but i dont remember her looking that good

she had was almost at her due date in the 2nd pic you nignog, of course she is fat

There is no way they meant physically. They were referring to her sudden increase in popularity.

Her fucking Ryan Dunn jab at Steve O was actually great. Fuck any faggot that it offends. She's a unfunny fat pig though.

>pregnant women are fat
have any of you ever stepped outside?

i dont think she's funny but you can't deny she wasn't hot

I actually don't.
I wasn't aware of her until after she started acting a fool

yes very interesting

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i wonder what it is about Amy that makes you want to bring her down like this. i wonder. hmm.

women i would beg to fuck
Amy Schumer
Sarah Silvermann
Samantha Bee
Tina Fey
Amy Poehler
Gilda Radner's corpse
MElissa McCarthy
Kristen Twiig

Leslie Jones is my #1. omg i want her. she is so fucking hot

>someone gets surgery to alter appearance because of deep routed depression
>FUCKING WRONG EN DISGUSTINGGGG

>slim girl becomes fat disgusting pig
>woo slaay queen

LAND OF THE FREEEEEE

I jacked off when I saw that special. Her legs were absolutely fucking hot and it made my tiny pp into big pp.
Then she got disgustingly fat and I wondered if it was really the same chick I busted multiple nuts to in the past.

That one pic of her showing her preggo tummy on stage makes my pp hard

it was classless, just because you can say something doesn't mean you should.

even on the left she has a greasy rounded rectangular face that shows all the signs of a propensity to obesity

can you get out?

Nope, and you can go back and listen to them gushing for fucking hours about how hot she is, and how sexy she is, and how much they wanted to bang her, that was my biggest problem with O&A, the constant "oh ya shes hot I would bang her" shit when Opie was a pussy and Anthony had a thing for drunk crazy bitches and Jim couldnt pull his head up off a tran cock long enough to think a girl was sexy.

>Remember when Amy Schumer was hot?
Back when she was Last Comic Standing? Not really.

american women age like bread

>Imagine marrying
ftfy

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After the bloating and gas subside she'll be a crisp 2000 degrees

>peaked my interest

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Same thing happened with my ex.

Some women use the excuse of being pregnant to eat whatever the fuck they want and let themselves go.

How can a women ruin herself in only 5 years?

Didn't Schumer have a dialog on Howard Stern consisting of "why is there always a debate between guys whether or not [she] is hot?" It was a clever question to raise and showed a spoonful of introspection on her part.
That's probably the only compliment I have for her.

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absolutely porcine

>peaked
literal brainlet

Remember when she had sex with Ezra Miller?

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D R O P P E D
R
O
P
P
E
D

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THAT made you consider dropping her..? Really?

this

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/thread

Dang. She used to look like that? I want to touch those thighs so bad

Her cuck husband let her keep her last name. His last name is Fisher. How many people actually remember who amy fisher was? That was her reason for not taking his last name.

Imagine that same fat girl had hours of interviews and "comedy" specials letting you know she was human excrement leading up to marrying her. Imagine you're ugly as sin but she takes an interest in you because you satisfy what is obviously her only need and deciding to let her lock it down and you go with that for some stupid fucking reason. She's using him because he can cook good and is a chef "to the stars" (i.e. most likely connected via nepotism) just as I'm sure he's using her to parlay his career into something bigger.

Christ. if you look at the pic on the right you can tell she was one bad weekend away from catastrophic fattening. I’d be lying if I said I wouldn’t fuck her in that 2012 pic tho

She lost 40 pounds for the movie "Trainwreck" and was barely acceptable. She needs to lose 100 now.
Is it all the latkes and gefilte causing it?

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I thought she miscarried like 6 months ago. I guess I'm in the timeline where that didn't happen.

Mama June LOOKS LIKE THAT!?

damn Amy looks like that!

How can this fucker be so handsome???

Some of you bastards will still have sex with her

Amy Schumer was never hot
she was just less ugly once

A true comedian would have worked with that. Plus it's Amy Schumer and she's lived in Long Island so she's totally fitting of being the next "Long Island Lolita". In her case it should be "Long Island Lardo".

Also, her whole PR shtick is weaponizing feminism. Her current way of marketing herself was to false flag that people were critiquing her for going back to work after two weeks of maternity leave. Imagine having followers who are so dumb they don't pick up on the whole "Amy Schumer is getting ______-shamed" click bait.

looking good Amy!

i need a list of reasons on why this thread did not end here

Jews are famous for being passive-aggressive, it is in everything they do, from comedy to banking.

how do i not make your mistake, bro?
what were the early warning signs?

>dat feel when you marry a 5/10 on a good day and she manages to devolve into a -1/10 that rivals Danny Devito in Drag

Is that the homo that played flash?

>Amy Schumer
>Hot

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Boomer

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t.mentally ill fat lover

this scene was very out of nowhere based Ezra saved it imagine having to be all like OH YEAH AMY YOUR SO HOT WITH YOUR MISS PIGGY FACE I WOULD TOTALLY HAVE SEX WITH YOU AND OR BE SEXUAL WITH YOU IN ANYWAY

Fat people are disgusting, have some goddamn self control

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Sup Brittany

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fpbp

We wanted to make fun of her more

>when your so ugly the only way to make someone having sex with you believable is to have them get coked out of their gourd

Art imitates life.

Not him but don't get comfortable, keep working on yourself. You should always seem available - attraction for women only exists if you're desired by others. They'll reciprocate

“Hot” and “arguably sorta fuckable” aren’t the same thing

Literally 90 percent of marriages.

>Literally 90 percent of marriages.

Even if you make it to marriage, she generally starts gaining weight the moment you give her an engagement ring.
It coincides with the taper-off of them sucking your dick too.

not for my parent. they both do sports both in their 50s and still fit
i guess the trick is to find someone who love doing sports, or else even if you do eat healthy you will turn into a fat fuck no matter what

He was unironically one of the better parts of that shit movie
youtube.com/watch?v=SXfb3hCF_Ak

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He's really good at failing miserably at being straight.

I deny that she was hot.

holy FUCK, she does look kinda hot in the left. that's why you shouldn't care about a girl anymore as soon as she turns 16

Imagine being Ezra in that scene and having to be all like "damn, Amy Schumer, you fuckin' fine, all sexy with your lumpy saggy body and horrific fat Jewess face. I would totally have sex with you, both my character and the real me."..when all he really wants to do is go suck off another stud in his dressing room. Like seriously imagine having to be Ezra and not only lay on that bed while Amy Schumer sits her massively overweight out of shape body on top of you, the favorable lighting barely concealing her stretchmarks and leathery skin, and just lay there, take after take, hour after hour, while she perfected the drunken foreplay scene. Not only having to tolerate her monstrous fucking visage but her haughty attitude as everyone on set tells her she's STILL GOT IT and DAMN, AMY SCHUMER LOOKS LIKE *THAT*?? because they're not the ones who have to lay there and feel her disgusting cottage cheese thighs and a sheer lack of sexual attractiveness in a woman that you didn't even know existed before that day. You've been fucking nothing but a healthy diet of twunks and black men and later alleged rape victims for your ENTIRE CAREER coming straight out of the boonies in New Jersey. You've never even seen anything this fucking disgusting before, and now you swear you can smell the sweat that's breaking out under her pendulous stomach flap as she acts out the sexual scene, smugly assured that you are enjoying the opportunity to get paid to lay there and revel in her "full-figured (for that is what she calls herself)" beauty, the beauty she worked so hard for with personal trainers in the previous months. And then the director calls for another take, and you know you could kill every single person in this room before the studio security could put you down, but you sit there and endure, because you're fucking Ezra. You're not going to lose your future film career over this. Just bear it. Hide your face and bear it.

A fat person losing weight and keeping it off will return to being fat much faster vs. someone who was never fat.
You don’t lose the fat cells, they just shrivel up until the next time you start packing in energy.

I mentioned this before but seeing pictures of people I was in college with 10 years later and it's insane. The guys look a little bit older, usually a little less hair and that's it, easily recognisable. The women on the other than look like completely different people, the number who ballooned in size and stopped putting any effort in once they were confident they'd locked a guy down is just nuts.

based and retard pilled
she's just a greedy slag, thats her fucking problem

She was never pretty, even when she was “hot”. She’s the human Miss Piggy. Her and Dunham are two of the ugliest cunts both inside and out in human history.

I deny she was hot. She was never hot.

>They'll reciprocate

You've clearly never been married. Or even been in a relationship longer than a year.

>gay jew porks fat she-beast jewess
Pottery. If only Jonah hill were there watching.

Lena Dunham makes Amy Schumer look like Elizabeth Banks

In one past the 3 year mark right now. Don't assume others made the same fuck up as you

No

She was never pretty, not even when she was a child.

Name at least five (5) TV shows, a movie, twelve video games, and an app

she's turning into andy milonakis

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IS that an IV in her hand?

He could fuck 90% of westwood and someone thought this casting would make sense. She's a pig

also my life

brb killing myself

his live streams are so painful. he could invest so much into himself and be a twink parading around asia, yet he got fat.

She named her son Genital Fissure....why?

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The jeweyest jews that ever jewed

>got fat
zoomer get out

>peaked
The only thing "THICC" in this thread is your fucking head, m8

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found the underaged millenial

/thread

no

Oh my god

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"Gene Atel Fisher"

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Simpsons predicted this.

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this is why your parents/grandparents told you to marry someone for other than looks. You marry a good, clean, wholesome girl, who is kind and feminine, has a nice smile, and is good with kids. Without red flags like obesity or tattoos. You marry a good mother, not a good whore.

>Ezra will never call you Daddy

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Imagine if they fucked and had a kid

FPBP

Posting in a thread that should be dead.

99% of everyone’s mother is this on some timeline

Why did he have a boner if he wasn't into it?

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>someone actually put the time in to make this

post more pictures, nigger

found the basement dweller virgin

Based and redpilled

I mean, it probably took them 10 minutes at most.

good, I hope it kills them

I remember suffering 8 years of kang niggers regime.

GOD I WISH THAT WERE ME

She looks like one of those overly wholesome suburban aunts

I personally don't care for her style of comedy but she's married and has a family

what do you have user

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/thread.

fpbp

This 100%

If you marry for reasons other than looks, you will end up with a more attractive spouse at the end of the day. The reasons for this only become apparent once you have enough life experience, which you just plain don't have yet at 20ish, so a lot of people end up making poor decisions.

>what do you have user

naked pictures of your mom

i beat every yakuza game and im listening to sad music on a friday night
heh

A little better bit

Dantes pique

holy based

PPPPPHH Ah hah hah hah — oh wait you were being serious.

I wouldn't say she was hot, but the 2012 pic is not necessarily unattractive. Those were good legs.

If that's a bottomless pit, is that stick infinitely long too? Otherwise, how would it work?

This peaks my interest.

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The ancient Japanese art of ikebana stopping techniques.

I bet you let yourself go too, fag

Fucking based

Any hot pictures of her when she was thin???

She was never really "hot", she just seemed attainable by the O&A crowd. Blonde dye job, not a whale (yet), talked dirty. She knew her perfect demographic - and left them in the dirt the second the big checks started rolling in.

I've just enjoyed her career bursting into flame and augering into the desert floor. She can't act. She has 3 expressions, and they all suck. She can't write. And now she's a fat pig. And she's gone, thank fucking god.

And we can thank Judd Apatow for her, and Lena Dunham. I'm so glad two of his biggest (pun intended) protoges have crashed and burned like Jewish Hindenbergs.

I believe her hair is natural blonde. She had blonde hair in her high school pictures too.

Amy Schumer was never hot. She was always overweight. At her very best she looks like Miss Piggy with a human nose.

Not even close. I remember that, it was shortly after announcing she was having a litter.

A woman who lets herself get like that when married doesn't love their partner, bottom line

I've had discussions about this with girls in the past and all the sane ones agree, both partners should stay in shape out of respect with partner, though an occasionally stress induced weight gain can be expected now and then as long as it's dealt with

Introspection? Really? Do you even know what that word means?

It's always been interesting how both Lena Dunham and Amy Schumer make similar films/shows:
>both are the main character
>both are coveted and have onscreen sex with attractive, muscular men
>both end up marrying a rich, handsome man at the end of the film
>both are explicitly feminist in themes

It always feels like watching a female equivalent to a Woody Allen film, but far more shameless and hamfisted in its self-insertion and without the redeeming artistic qualities.

That's not her natural color. Look at the roots. That's how you can tell a woman's real hair color. If she's a lazy pig, she lets them grow out. My sisters were platinum blond as kids, and still had light blond hair in high school, but they were dying it lighter by 22. Schumer is no different.

I don't know why you'd even try to defend that point.

You wouldn't say that to my face faggot.

>It's always been interesting how both Lena Dunham and Amy Schumer make similar films/shows:
It's not interesting at all. Apatow thought he was a starmaker because Girls blew up. He was going for another with Schumer - and then both of them burned to the ground.
I think it's a weird jewish guilt thing, he's making up for doing 40 year old virgin by trying to elevate cunts from the tribe way past their natural level - and got burned, hard. Or he made deals to get money for shit like "This is 40" by putting these unfunny, talentless cunts in productions he produced.

Now patrice calling hr hot makes sense

No because she was always untalented and had a butter face

What is every marriage ive ever seen for $300 alex

Patrice O'Neal talked about the concept of "hot FOR".
As in Amy Schumer wasn't hot, but she was hot FOR a female comic.

pic related: a female comic (a real one)

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Yeah but what about DAT ASS DAWG!!! Same with women, why marry a good dude with a successful life when you could finally make deshaun stop being a gangbanger if you have a child together!!

>"just have a kid and get married bro. Everyone is doing it. Who cares if you cant afford it and your wife cheats on you? BE A MAN!!"

I feel so sorry for how many people i know who fell for this meme and are now suffering horrible lives. If you have a brain you wait till you have youre life together before you start kicking out babies. Unfortunately most people with children decided being poor and having kids is the perfect way of life.

>Amy Schumer
>Samantha Bee
>Melissa McCarthy

mfw

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Judd didnt realize eventually you need actual talent to go anywhere.