Get crowned

Because his magic uses purple crystals which were brought from Valinor, and the middle Earth had an import quota which limited the number of purple crystals that could be imported to middle Earth without an import tax surcharge.

I wonder what was Aragorn's tax policy regarding this...

Aragorn wasn't king when Gandalf was running his import/export business you retard, Denethor controlled tax policy as Stewart.

>things non-whites will never understand

That's fucken gay.

He inherited autism from Inceldur

There is none.

Don't project, sneedy.

>as Stewart

the whole universe was created by a guy singing, and sauron's master didnt like it so he tried to ruin the song on purpose

If the poems and songs aren't your favourite bits of Tolkien's universe then you're an absolute shit taste pleb.

I wonder if Grima Wormtongue messed with Theoden’s tax policies during his manipulation. He could’ve taxed the fuck out of the people, angering the peasants and allowing him to siphon money to Saruman. It is for exclusions like these, that Tolkien was truly a poor writer.

So was she a roastie or was it prime elf pussy? Did Arwen have any partners before Aragorn?

>t. a gay

>tried to ruin the song on purpose
I don’t think Melkor was intentionally throwing. He just wanted to make his own song.

was he singing about his tax reform plans?

>actually liking tom bombadil
have sex

>doesn’t hit the wall for another 2000 years
You sure about that lad?

>be so happy after triumphing over great adversity
>start to sing
>op will never know that feel
LMAO

She was a virgin. Elfs mate for life.

she was prime elf puss
in the silmarillion an elf woman is raped so she becomes the wife of her rapist
sex is a big deal for elves

Tom Bombadil would fuck your ass from sun up to sun down you little incel faggot

Basically this, he covets the Secret Fire more than anything. Illuvatar even says that Melkor's own song ultimately flows from him, this tilts the Melkor.

Who's Stewart?

Glorfindel fingered her

>Stewart
No, that's Star Trek. Gandalf was played by Peter Dinklage.

God just imagine her smooth soft innie coochie coo inside her elf silk panties I bet its stained and smells like roses

Do you think Bombadil may have been Eru?
Why is there no backstory for him besides Oromë?

>woman is raped so she becomes the wife of her rapist

This is literally from the Bible.

Bombadil is just Illuvatar being a troll

Tolkien was a Catholic

>allowing him to siphon money to Saruman.

Who promptly wasted it by buying licenses for pointless shit like Sauron's black orcs instead of using public domain alternatives like Udûn's orkas.

More likely a personification of Middle Earth, potentially even the “spirit” of Middle Earth inadvertently created unbeknownst to even Eru, which is why he can dominate all of the spirits of the forest and whatnot. He seems clueless as to happenings and a true neutral so nothing else makes sense.

No, Bombadil and Shelob and Ungoliant were creatures from outside of Iluvatar's creation who currently resided in middle earth. They were written as representing mysteries that no one knows the source of, either good or bad.

I understand liking them but you're a legitimate queer if the singing and poetry is your favorite part when there's so much other cooler and more interesting shit to choose from.
Call me a pleb but I'd rather be a pleb than a faggot

>gets crowned
>hikes tax rates
Was he Jewish?

He was nerfed big time before being send on Middle Earth

Especially because she did literally nothing in the books.

Why didn't he make a quip?

>Ugoliant and Shelob
These two are not mysteries.

Shelob is Ungoliant’s offspring and no one knows what the fuck Ungoliant actually is. If Bombadil is a spirit of Middle Earth, Ungoliant is a spirit of empty space. Very unlikely that Ungoliant is a corrupted Maia or anything of the sort and is rather likely just a byproduct of creation.

If you never fuck any women what's the point in you being in being straight?

>Tells the elderly rohan archer to stop firing, in Elvish
pure autism

I get to look down on homo nerds like people who think the gay songs are the best part of LotR

you have to be 18 to post here

You have to be straight to post on Yea Forums too but people treat that rule lightly

Why didn't Aragorn challenged Sauron to a dance off?
Was Sauron that much of a good dancer?

He's making gay films now, fuck him

This shit is always funny

No but yoyure soulless op

>gets crowned
>bows to some hobbits
Not even a minute into his reign he's already on the apology tour. What a faggot.

Me

Nothing is outside of Eru's creation.
That's the whole point. Even the deepest, darkest evils were made by him, because goodness needs opposing force to thrive.

Those things are outside of the Valar's knowledge yeah, but not Eru.

>Tolkein called Jon Snow 60 years ago

Whats wrong with her not being a virgin? The elves where the most promiscuous of all the races

The whole creation was literally a fucking song.

Checked based Silmarilian poster

kek.

i would kneel to that man

isnt this Tolkien's explanation?

>you may not like it, but this is what peak tax policy looks like

Fun fact: my mom babysitted Liv Tyler

Did they fugg?

no he wouldnt he just sings all day and forgets habitually. guy has brain dmg.
just a giant spider created by melkors song dude. she ate some trees and rekt the elves.

>now come the taxes of the king
How did Gandalf know?

No user, Liv Tyler was only like 23 when it happened.

I literally stood up and walked out

He's just a conjurer of cheap tricks

reminder that tolkien, being a religious catholic and classical liberal, would support Trump and the new right if he were alive today. how SEETHING are trannies over this? oh and he would be absolutely repulsed by your tranny fuck wound, as is any man.

Attached: numales345.jpg (596x447, 71K)

Damm just like a song of ice and fire
Does GMMR knows about this guy stealing his ideas???

>Tolkien a lover of jews
>supports Trump - a shabbos goy
kino.

Just like real life, fyi

I mean those are fucking AMAZING shoes when we're talking medieval technology
Gandalfs wearing the future my nigga

all politicians are influenced by jews. the only time trump is able to get anything through congress is when it is something pro-israel. also, only israeli jews like him. media jews and globalist jews fucking abhor him.

Did you ever think maybe he was just being lazy and that level magic would actually be more work than sitting on his ass on some boat for a few weeks?

>>Gave all the credit to a bunch of irrelevant midgets like he didn't care
Except Frodo and Sam defeated the evil, not Aragorn who was about to get fucked in the ass before the ring was destroyed.

based and genesispilled

What roastie would give up their eternal youth for a man?

a daring synthesis

whats wrong? they are leather boots, like everyone else has; just white.

Fuck Eowyn.

Aragorn’s song is a descendant of all the noble houses of the Elves and Men from the first age. Except that one.

angels wear yeezys

Idk man, elrond's wife got raped by orcs and she got so depressed she died and went to valinor

he has my axe

She was spawned outside of creation.

Maybe he wanted to enjoy the boat trip

As opposed to the roastie feminist that takes horse dick? Yeah I’d take the elf.

Arwen > Eowyn. It's science.

Tolkien was all about the singing and the music.

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yet they made the hobbits spend hours in makeup every morning putting on their feet even if the feet weren't in the shot lol

there isn't anything outside Eru's creation though

Based, fucking illiterates ruining our Middle Earth

kek

isn't the octopus thing (Watcher in the Water or something like that) also an enigma?

youtube.com/watch?v=pG3u2TEdENQ&list=PL94gOvpr5yt2LHGDMo3ZCSYRwPFHuUAjZ

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Who is the most soi in this picture? Rob or everyone else?

Booze cruise.
Duh.

That's good.

Shadowfax.

that image is fake

Power is finite within the being of arda so the more shit you do the weaker you become. He probably didnt want to waste his mana when he could fly economy.

illusions dad you don't have time for my illusions