Patient is a 21 year old male. No physical conditions upon preliminary examination, no family history, clean medical record. Graduated from a good school, earns a great wage, is interesting funny and a solid 7/10. Still can't get a girlfriend.
Differential diagnosis, go people.
Autism?
Standards too high. Not willing to be attracted to people attracted to him.
He's gay. Chase, get in there, I know he's not an underage girl, but just pretend he is - he's flat like she was.
No, can't be autism, he wasn't vaccinated, he doesn't drink tap water and his father was 25 when he conceived him
Lupus?
he thinks he can do better than ugly girls but he cant
Incelitis?
>is interesting funny
Clearly not interesting or funny is you can't get a girlfriend at 21 with all of those things. I think you're delusional. Also do you even go on tinder or try to go places to meet women? Kys loser
Patient suffers from Hypoheightosis, also known as Manlet-Short syndrome. Prognosis isn't good, in almost all cases they never learn.
Fuck when did I become 21? I remember making fun of all you 2x year old losers years ago
Patient is clearly a spook of some variety, a ghost. I don't think we're even authorised to treat him
He's gay. Next!
He might have some neurological-
SHUT UP NIGGER!
Cameron, perform a full psychoanalysis for signs of autism, Chase and Foreman, check out this creep's apartment
GET HIM INTERFERON STAT!
What does drinking tap water have to do with autism?
The patient is clearly one of those incels. It's a new illness. Unfortunately there's no cure
someone post the
>this vexes me
gif please
We got onto his computer and found several folders full of this same underage girl dancing, recent files show he accesses them daily. Can't be gay.
Maybe deep vein thrombosis?
It appears we've found the solution dr. house.
the patient's dick is simply too big.
Have sex
That can't be, it's only 8.5 inches long.
ADHD and tiny touch of spasticism
t. autistic tap water drinker
Tiny weiner.
One says too big, one says too small.
Cameron get in here and give him an oral examination.
Traps are gay
Maybe he is suffering from the gay condition?
How often does he leave the house? He must have a Facebook, Twitter, and Tinder... look there.
Check it again, you mixed up the girth and length.
More like 24 and not gonna graduate until 27 :-)
>He must have a Facebook, Twitter, and Tinder... look there.
Guys a ghost, doesn't even have a reddit account. This is rare, only 3 cases in the united states in the last 5 years.
Patient suffers from a deficiency of confidence. Closer examination reveals the patient is afraid to escalate sexual contact with women he's interested in. Recommended self-treatment, patient is to touch women he's talking to, and slowly escalate to more "sexual" touching over the course of the conversation, starting with the shoulder or upper back, then the lower back, then the thigh, wrapping his arm around her back and pulling her in, and then going in for a kiss.
>doesn't even have a reddit account
What's he doing all day, what hobbies does he have? Reading, weight-lifting, horseback riding, there has to be something.
What do we have on those other cases?
>i to am in this episode
always gets a kek thanks user
When the fuck will the nudes be released.
>wanting 12+ partner count tinder thots
Societal narcissism on a massive scale. Refer him to a psychiatrist to keep the cogs turning.
>Patient is a 21 year old male. No physical conditions upon preliminary examination, no family history, clean medical record. Graduated from a good school, earns a great wage, is interesting funny and a solid 7/10. Still can't get a girlfriend.
No I get it. He got an MRI last week with contrast, but suffers from kidney disease so he was unable to urinate out the contrast agent. the agent stayed in the body and increased his inflammation factor up to 9+ which triggered an ischemic heart attack, causing a massive release of white blood cells to the heart muscle. The byproduct of so many white blood cells created a false positive for lukemia and when they gave him chemotherapy it made him into a virgin....permanently.
>ventinius doomerus. it’s a condition affecting many people of his “ilk”, if you know what I mean. No drive, no ambition, just sits on his computer and posts frogs on a Laotian arts and crafts forum. I’m gonna talk to Cuddy, see if I can get him some testosterone injections. The subsequent desire for female contact may drive him to clean up his act.
Could be ligma.... (shuffling in drawer, getting out mints and putting them in bottle). This will do the trick! (swapping hydrocodone out and putting in his pocket)
>testosterone injections
House you and I both know that this type of person doesn't just "clean up their act." I'm putting in an order for estrogen AND gender counseling.
>he doesn’t know about the fluoride.
>mouse bite serum
Sensible chuckle
>ventinius doomerus
kek
Try being 22, kiddo
It’s fucking hell
let me tell you about 23, my God it's a mess.
t. 30+ year olds
Stop trying to fit in
Jokes on you I’ve been fishing for a reply all day, check mate faggot
>interesting funny and a solid 7/10
Okay who made the anamnesis ? Because they patient is clearly lying.
Spudro spärde
I didn't I took advice and started working at 16
saved up 5 years of paychecks of a minimum wage job and have 64k at 21
now I skipped uni but if you notice people who go still end up with the same job but think they are too good for it, now i'm their boss
those 30 year old neets are going to have to report to me sooner or later and they are going to cry inside
kekd
fucking based
Sorry user, I’m not from a third-world country like the USA, please elaborate
Maybe 14 has something to say about this. Or should I leave the black and the gay alone? maybe he swings that way, or maybe he was African American in another life. I don't know, either way, I need my pills.
>raughs
>he doesn't know