So I just saw end game

First of all, let me preface this by saying I have nothing but contempt for the entire MCU. I hate this nerd culture that destroyed the movie industry and I hate people who enjoy these """"""""""films"""""""""".

With that out of the way, I'll tell you my experience seeing this movie today. Unlike what you'd expect, I won't be talking about the movie itself or even giving you my opinion on it. I really couldn't give a fuck what happens to a talking tree or a flying Chris Hemsworth, because I'm not child.

Rather, I'll be telling you about my experience in the theater. So, I showed up to the theater 10 minutes before the start time with my gf. Walking to our seats gave me an opportunity to see the faces of all the losers in the audience. We were seated in the middle or so of the theater so I was able to see the faces of all the people sitting behind us. The backseats are usually occupied by losers who bought their tickets months in advance and have no purpose in their lives outside of consuming pop culture.

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Once the movie started and the lights dimmed I immediately became bored. Again, I'm not a child or an emotionally stunted, bed-wetting man so I wasn't entertained by a children's movie. To keep myself awake, I started throwing popcorn at the mouth breathers sitting behind us. And I didn't do it subtlety, either. I turned my body completely around and sat on the seat with my knees- facing the theater backwards- as I hurled popcorn at them. The shock and disbelief they experienced at what was happening to them caused me to laugh hysterically. I ran out of popcorn quickly so I had to throw candy at them instead. One of the fattest and ugliest of the losers got out of his seat and announced he was alerting the usher. As he walked passed my aisle I tripped him causing him to roll down the stairs and knock his glasses off. I got out of my seat to help him look for them and I "accidentally" crushed his glasses with the heel of my shoe.

sneed

One of his friends (yes, I'm just as surprised as you he had friends) leaped out of his seat and ran over to him. He tried to call me "a fucken asshole" as he helped his friend up but he was stuttering too hard for it be intelligible. He was visibly shaking as well. He raised his bony finger at me and had the audacity to poke my chest and shakily proclaim that I made a terrible mistake. This poor, delusional bastard-living out some kind of power fantasy- thought he was Captain America or something. I immediately snatched his finger and started bending it backwards. He quickly fell to his knees. He couldn't even let out a scream, he just began hyperventilating with his mouth wide open. He tried to weakly spurt out mercy. I tilted my head forward with the tip of my right ear bent towards him and responded, "What was that, kiddo? Speak up I can't hear you." I could hear the bones in his finger crunching as he used the last ounce of his strength to ask for mercy again. I chuckled to myself and let the poor kid go. The once jeering spectators whom I was pelting with popcorn and candy immediately shut their mouths and sat in their seats in stunned silence. They saw what I did with those who were brave enough to stand up to me. I beckoned my girlfriend over and told her we were leaving. On our way out I poured my drink out on the fat loser who was pathetically still looking for his glasses- his friend curled up in a ball and writhing in pain next to him.

then why you paid for it you dumb cuck?

On our walk back to our car I saw a little kid wearing an Ironman mask. I went up to him and rattled off a few character names I know and told him they were all dead. The kid started bawling. It looked so pathetic with his mask on. His balding father ran up to me and demanded that I apologize. At least, he tried to demand it. He was stuttering and staring at his shoes the whole time while rubbing the back of his neck. I pitied the kid for being raised by such a weak man. I quickly dealt with him my smashing his head in with my fist like a wack-a-mole. He dropped like a lead balloon. My girlfriend and I stepped on his body on the way out. One of the ushers nodded at me in respect and I fucked my gf when I got home.

UH BASED?

Thought I'd give it a chance because of the hype. Waste of 20 bucks. Good thing I make a ton of money.

How was the post Endgame sex, OP?

>I hate nerd culture
>Posts the dumb frog (probably has a folder full of them)
You're part of the problem dumb nigger.