How do we fix Hollywood?

How do we fix Hollywood?

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This is Bernie Goetz. Six years ago, Bernie found a wounded squirrel in Central Park. One of its legs was torn off. He immediately brought it back to his apartment and nursed it back to health. The two are now inseparable and the squirrel likes to ride around on Bernie's back. The City of New York has said that it is illegal to keep a pet squirrel and has kept him tied up in court over it for years, but he intends to simply continue to waste the city's time until his little buddy dies of old age.

If the name Bernie Goetz sounds familiar to you, then yes, he is the man who was acquitted for shooting four black teenagers on the subway in 1984 when they attempted to mug him.

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>4 non fatal injuries

He should've aimed better

I found a lost baby squirrel at my apartment complex. It didn't run away or anything when I approached it and I tried feeding it bread. It's mother finely came by and bit it to carry it away. The mother looked back at me as if to thank me for watching it's child.
>mfw i should've stomped on the baby squirrel

Dude why can't birds just drink onions like! Liberals are fucking retarded.

fairly sure that squirrel has since died, but he's still a "squirrel advocate" so my guess is he's taken in more

putting taxes to degeneration?

saving that squirrel won't bring her back, patton.
you can't trade life for life with a squirrel, and you can't absolve your sins.
ADMIT IT

Mankind cannot create anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. Patton was trying to transmute his wife back to life.

>acquitted for shooting four black teenagers on the subway in 1984
I want to be this man's best friend

help me government!!!

>pay taxes to government
>receive government services
what a scam!

What about all the niggers abusing the welfare system?

>inability to opt out of government services
Yes it's a scam brainlet

Diseases squirrels can carry:
>Salmonellosis.
>Lyme disease and other tick-borne diseases.
>Tularemia.
>Leptospirosis.

it's a fucking pest, you dolt.
>Rabies.

wow this is rich, he kills his wife but loses it over a rat.

kek

>don't pay taxes to government
>get the services anyway from people who do pay

>At the 14th Street station, Goetz entered the car through the rearmost door, crossed the aisle and took a seat on the long bench across from the door. Canty was across the aisle from him, lying on the long bench just to the right of the door. Allen was seated to Canty's left, on the short seat on the other side of the door. Ramseur and Cabey were seated across from the door and to Goetz's right, on the short seat by the conductor's cab.[14] According to Goetz's statement to the police, approximately ten seconds later, Canty asked him, "How are you doing?" Goetz responded, "Fine." According to Goetz, the four men allegedly gave signals to each other, and shortly thereafter Canty and Allen rose from their seats and moved over to the left of Goetz, blocking him off from the other passengers in the car. Canty then said, "Give me five dollars." Goetz subsequently pulled a handgun and fired multiple shots at the four men, wounding all.

based

>can't save his wife
>try to save a squirrel
What did he mean by this?

>compassion is a sin

It's the only good deed in your useless life so don't regret not stomping it

>ask a jew for 5 dollars
>gets gun down
heh

that's living in society
you can always fuck off to a cave somewhere if you dont like paying taxes

>LISTER: At some point in their lives, most people wish they were someone else. This is going back years, years, before the accident. Kochanski had just finished with me, and I was feeling really pony. So I went for a walk in the botanical gardens, and I saw this squirrel, climbing up and down the tree collecting nuts. And it stopped, and it looked at me, and I thought: "You lucky little sod - you like your job, you're your own boss, and you've got no woman trouble, so you'll never feel as bad as I feel now. And at that moment, I mean for a split second, I would have given anything - *anything* - to swap places with him.
>CAT: Ah, that's awful, man. When a woman screws you up so bad you want to become a squirrel.
>LISTER: It just made me think that a lot of the time, being human isn't much fun!
>RIMMER: So, Lister, what are you telling us? You're a closet squirrel? Behind closed doors, you parade up and down with a strap-on bushy tail calling yourself "Nutkin?"

That's straight out of seinfeld.

Read his interview where he's reenacting the shooting and makes a remark about "lightning fast Barry Allen."

Kick the wife murderers and pedos out. Like that's ever going to happen.

the jews

It's not compassion. It's virtue signaling and attention whoring.

fuck those tree niggers. already killed 3 this season

actually white people receive the most money through welfare racist

Based dubs. I bought an air rifle just to kill those fuckers. Can't use my .22 cause my neighbors are pussies.

>paying taxes

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kek he what does think animal control is going to do, nurse a fucking squirrel back to health. Theyre too busy busing pitbulls to the vet to be put down after they bit someone or their lazy owner lets them loose

>rat with a fluffy tail
Good luck with those diseases

admit what?

>Virtue signaling has reached new heights.

he killed his wife and he tried killing that squirrel

he probably injured the squirrel

Look up something called "tsar bomba."

HOLY SHIT SO YOU BE SAYIN THAT NATURE IS TAKING ITS COURSE EVEN WITH HUMAN INTERVENTION?

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what a fucking cuck

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Patton's wife ODed on Xanax Adderal and Fentanyl

Good job letting it suffer during it's last moments. Should have stomped it.

He died. The squirrel DIED.

Friendly reminder that the "Patton killed his wife" meme is retarded. The truth is that his wife killed herself to get away from him.

It's a fucking squirrel who gives a shit

>look at how sympathetic I am sitting my fat ass on the curb taking photos of a dying animal to virtue signal with!
this is the kind of shit I expect from the facebook friend that hasn't amounted to anything since highschool, not a celebrity

Was he trying to make a ebin meme?

Based

just found a nest of baby rabbits yesterday while mowing...tossed them over the bluff. Citiy folk are getting soft.

what a pussy. i bet this cunt will eat chicken nuggets and not even blink

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BASED
AS
FUCK!

>narrating the slow suffering-filled death of an animal while you livestream it is more humane than going to the garage, getting a shovel, and cutting its head off

Ai-yi-yi.

O M G
Literally crying now
I can't even

But this is exactly the type of shit to expect from celebrities

it's a cover so that people think he's an empathetic guy, he doesn't want any more people suspecting that he murdered his wife

Gotta admit. /pol/ is getting better at pushing their agenda.

I always believed in this guy. Wish he was a better shot though.

per capita nigger

thank god he shared this with the world. God forbid anyone have a meaningful moment in private every again.

I don't see whats wrong with this.

biopic when?

This man is double based and double redpilled

What a legend

The truth? Hard to imagine you need to "push" it but OK buddy.

Isnt this thw guy from ManvsFood?

imagine getting outwitted by a crow

Snub revolvers are hard to shoot well, and .38 special is significantly weaker than 9mm. A potentially tragic combination.

Birds can be huge assholes.

>helping animals is bad

Yea Forums is becoming more retarded every day

Birds are fucking brutal, dude
youtube.com/watch?v=dZQLi9yW3_w

Quit giving them your money.

t. city cuck

The fat fuck didn't even let the crow eat it. He had another basedboy drive to where he was, pick the squirrel up and bury it. What a fucking cuck.

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>inability to opt out
>what is going off the grid
>implying your useless, s o y drinking ass would opt out of the only thing keeping you alive anyways

basedboy

why the fuck is s o y censored?

the grey fuckers are an invasive species in my country and politicians are currently unironically discussing if they should be rounded up and imprisoned in "quarantaine stations" or just caught and gassed.

>not burying it yourself
Coward
I’m a massive crybaby over animals and I bury doves that die in my backyard all the time.

Go back you tryhard edgelord faggot

>A literal rodent is easier to live with than niggers

Bravo, chimps. Bravo.

youtube comments are as funny as ever

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>robbing a based crowbro of its meal to try save a useless nut guzzling treenigger
>interfering with natural predation

Did this asshole never watch nature documentaries as a kid?

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It's literally a Ponzi Scheme

How can one man be so based....

I have had 2 grey squirrels but I got them as babies, their eyes were not even open yet. I live in NC and they got blown out of a tree and their mom never came back for them after a day I brought them in. They lived 2 and 3 years. I got a license and all that during that time and those diseases are rare, sub 5% and almost non existent once they are kept indoors and fed a proper diet. Nothing different than keeping any other pet that is not a dog.

Corvids are based, watching them niggers hold Crow Court is kino.

Squirrels to the nuts!

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>Canty then said, "Give me five dollars." Goetz subsequently pulled a handgun and fired multiple shots at the four men, wounding all.
Unbelievably based

>crow

Yeah, one of the smartest birds...

Now this is a Bernie I can get behind. Feel the Bern.

>NYC too autistic to let a guy keep a squirrel
>No, it's him wasting the city's time

buttcrack

Amazing. Based and kind hearted man.

Based.
These posts also answer OP's question

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>helps heal a squirrel
>wasting (((Jew))) York's time and taxes over it
>Shooting a bunch of nogs

Based and Redpilled but unironically.

It's not just your country. To my knowledge large parts of Europe are infested. The Grauhörnchen isn't native here and is super competitive as its larger and stronger than the Eichhörnchen so its actively eradicating the local Eichhörnchen population. To my knowledge there isn't much that can be done about it.

Do you part and get an air gun.

>A month after the shootings, Cabey's lawyers William Kunstler and Ron Kuby filed a civil suit against Goetz.The case was tried in 1996, over eleven years later, in the Bronx, with race as the dominant theme. During jury selection, Kuby asked the mostly non-white prospective jurors whether they had ever been discriminated against.

>The jury awarded Cabey $43 million – $18 million for pain and suffering and $25 million in punitive damages. Goetz subsequently filed for bankruptcy, saying that legal expenses had left him almost penniless. A judge of the United States Bankruptcy Court ruled that the $43 million jury award could not be discharged by the bankruptcy.

>Asked in 2004 whether he was making payments on the judgment, Goetz responded "I don't think I've paid a penny on that", and referred any questions on the subject to his attorney.

BASED

FUCK NIGGERS AND FUCK KIKE LAWYERS

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Bernie "can't get me" Goetz

Based American squirrels.

Sounds like a movie plot.

Nuke it.

>be nigger
>try to mug someone
>get shot
>sue cause dindu nuffin
>jury of niggers award me 43 million shekels
>kike judges say it's okay

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Patton is losing it. First his wife died, then he exploded on Twitter over everyone shitting on Ghostbusters, and now he's trying to save a dead squirrel because he sees his wife in it. Does anyone have a number we can call for this guy? Like a wellness checkup? I'm worried he might kill himself

Why PETA is so cringe?

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His O&A appearance is classic

Jesus, if you actually want to help it, just stand by until hes finished death snorin' Thats all you can do

A squirell can also mangle up your face in seconds.
Please everyone tell your children not to mess with squirells.

Give it the ol' mercy stomp.

then you're a dumb nigger

Imagine being a man with a good amount of money out for a stroll. You see some fucking rodent being pecked at by a crow, you run over to shoo the crow away. You don't stop there though, now you have to make it someone else's problem so that you can go about your day with a warm and fuzzy thinking "I did all I could". You check the times for any local animal services, but they're all closed so you snap a fucking picture of the fucking squirrel so that everyone who follows you on twitter sees what a kindhearted faggot you are. Now you wait, hoping you get some retweets and a number from someone so that you can just go about your day while someone else has to deal with the fucking squirrel.

See how fucking stupid that is? Let's shorten this up:

I see a half dead squirrel. I either fucking nurse it back to health, or I go about my business and don't fuck with the rules of nature.
And they run when the sun comes up, with their lives on the line.

I imagine they celebrated pretty hard until they realized that even if you win a lawsuit against a minimum wage worker with zero savings you don't actually get any money.

>HELP ME SAAAAAAVE THIS SQUIREEELLL DDD:

what an absolute fag, out of touch with the natural order, and with his own priorities

People here already dont like him and that is an enormously faggy thing to social media about. He deserves to get roasted.

I'm going to sue a stone for all of its blood.

Patton is soi as hell, but you’re a sociopath.