>In the beginning, Captain Marvel saves Iron Man. Of course she does.
>They decide to find Thanos. Iron Man says paraphrased "see, captain america, you're an idiot. because of you we have no surveillance net to detect thanos". Means: They can't detect where he is.
>Nebula says: Oi, I can tell you where he is. He's in his garden.
>She doesn't say on which planet.
>Rocket runs a 2 second scan on his computer and says "Oi, we found an energetic signature similar to the snap on this planet here a few days ago"
>That must be him
>No shit sherlock.jpg
>can't detect him. but they know it's a garden, so now they can easily detect him.
>Thanos is in his garden, alone.
>Captain Marvel flies in and grabs him. She's so strong he cannot move at all in her grab and is made to answer questions. To be completely fair, he looks very weakened, but it's still retarded. She clings to him like some weird alien parasite all the time.
>He says he used the stones to destroy the stones (that's what they detected) and it almost killed him, which is why he looks weakened. I mean ... this is kind of stupid to be honest, how can you just destroy some kind of magical infinity stones intrinsically connected to the universe without some consequence
Holy shit this movie SUCKED (very long rant)
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>Why the fuck does a snap create a Gamma radiation signature? (this is what Hulk says later) They're fucking magic. This makes zero sense.
>Captain Marvel eventually announces she will leave. Raccoon questions why tf she is leaving. She says "because what happened here happened on other planets too". Uhm bitch you are human take care of your own fucking people perhaps? What are you, universe police? Raccoon lowers his head and says something like 'yeah makes sense' and just accepts that. Bc you don't talk back at muh empowered captain marvel, that's why. Oh yeah captain marvel has short hair from this point on.
>Beginning is incredibly slow. Lots of slow pointless unnecessary scenes with lots of talking etc.
>Ant Man magically reappears in the (probably no longer connected to an energy source) van time machine thingy that's now in some weird place guarded by some dude. Car yard? This is 5 years later.
>Ant Man thus suggests time travel. How did he suddenly appear 5 times later? Coincidence. That's right. Coincidence. He got lucky and stumbled into the right quantum tunnel or whatever and came out exactly 5 years later. Right.
>They pitch the idea to Tony Stark. He now has a kid and family and it's a long blah blah blah.
>Tony sits down and just invents controlled time travel in a matter of hours basically. "hah, that was easy"
>Time travel. Enough said. Incredibly stupid.
HAVE
>So they are about to time jump and what do they NOT do? That's right, they DON'T call Captain Marvel. Because fuck you, that's why. We can save the universe, but I guess it's not important enough to call the strongest being in the entire universe to help.
>Time travel: Old locations revisited, just for nostalgia and jokes and nothing more.
>Thor, royal blood, lightning in his venes, has metabolism of a God - grows weak, gross and fat from drinking beer
>Why is Thor the only one who gets turned into a weak loser? Because he's the strongest one ofc and they can't have that
>when they're in the past and fail, they despair, saying "we only have this one pym particle left" - they are in teh fucking past, why don't they get new ones from Hank Pym who is still very alive and active?
>More than that, why did they go there during the battle of New York while everything was hectic? Why not just steal it from the research lab Loki stole it from? I guess that would make too much sense.
A DRINK
>Hulk is of course easily punched out of his body and thus defeated by the female sorceress, bc MUH women power. but he pleads with her and she gives it up eventually bc Dr. Strange gave it to Thanos in the future and she thinks Dr. Strange super smart
>And why didn't they just get the time stone first and then used the time stone to time travel and get the other stones. Wtf? This makes zero sense and it's just so they can pack pointless action sequences in there.
>"but what if they can't operate a time stone". they could literally just ask the sorceress who wields it for help doing that. That's A. B is that they have Hulk and Hulk later operates all 6 stones to snap everyone back. Yes he gets badly hurt, but surely he can operate a single one? And if not, surely Captain Marvel can! Oh but wait, they didn't bother to ask her to come with them. Because fuck you that's why.
>Black Widow and Hawkeye go to get soul stone. One must be sacrificed. Neither is willing to sacrifice the other. They fight. Of course Black Widow wins easily bc feminism. So Black Widow forces her own sacrifice by jumping down.
>Uhm, if she killed herself, does that still count as him sacrificing her? That doesn't really make sense?
>Tony Stark meets his dad in the past, because why not, it's super sentimental and he gets to covertly-awkwardly tell him he loves him
>They come back
>Thor should be perfectly capable of handling the gauntlet, but the others don't let him because he has a beer belly (what?!?)
>Hint: The original gauntlet was in the fucking original Asgard chambers. It's literally made for gods like him.
>So Hulk handles the gauntlet, goes K.O. ofc because he's just a human, but succeeds snapping everyone back
>suddenly Thanos' ship appears from the past and bombs the Avengers headquarter completely to the ground to the point where it goes up in a giant ball of fire within seconds
>somehow humans like Hawkeye survive this and the internal structure of the building is still intact. Right.
>How the fuck does Thanos know how to time travel? From looking at incomplete video recordings of Tony Stark building a time machine?! Oh thats right he got a flask of Pym particles. Naturally he knows how to use them and this ancient human technology from the 70s or so suddenly allows interstellar traveller aliens like himself to invent time travel.
>If Thanos can time travel, why did he come exactly to the moment after they performed the snap and not come way earlier and just wait for the Avengers to return? Or just travel into the past to get the stones even earlier?
>At beginning of final battle, Thanos announces that he will, this time, completely eradicate the universe and create a new one in its stead. So that people will not be resentful over what they lost but instead grateful for what they have
>"why didn't he just create new resources" is literally completely 100% valid. Thanos retard confirmed.
>The argument "he killed 50% of all people so that others would feel the loss and become scared and keep population down" literally 100% rebuked.
>Thor, who was able to defeat a Thanos WITH the gauntlet, now is easily defeated by Thanos despite wielding two hammers because he drank a few beers over the years
>Everyone gets very easily defeated by Thanos, even though he has no gauntlet
>Black Panther is the first resuscitated hero who arrives at the battlefield to help, in a very slow moment along with his two female bodyguards. He gets the longest individual spotlight among those who return. We wuz kings n shit. Everyone else just comes in hurriedly at once after that.
>Wakanda Army: Talk about bringing spears to an intergalactic lasergunfight. Of course no US Army or anything like that appears. But Wakanda and its spears are ready to fight! Black Panther does the weird Africa chant ofc.
I didn't watch this since im boy cotting Brie Larson.
>Iron Man has a moment with Dr. Strange and Dr. Strange says "If I had told you what would happen, it wouldn't have happened." Nice attempt at fixing the plotholes!
>Mind you, they all arrived through Dr. Strange type sorcerer holes. They just deliberately didn't decide to involve the army. Or fighting jets. Or tanks. Or, you know, just stuff that might actually help.
>In one scene, Thanos - with ease - defeats a dual-hammer wielding lightning-buzzing lightning-eye Thor and Captain America simultaneously- WITHOUT the gauntlet
>Spiderman is transporting the gauntlet somewhere (who knows why or where) and he clings to a flying Mjolnir with his web to get away from enemies, then he is "saved" by Pepper in the Iron Man suit. Despite him of course still being able to shoot webs as demonstrated in the scene directly before this one. After that he is being transported by Valkyrie on her Pegasus horse thingy. WOMEN SAVE THE DAY YAY
>Black Panther wants to carry the gauntlet to whoever then, but of course fails because he's a man and Wanda very easily saves him
>Wanda is so strong Thanos completely loses control over his emotions and squirms like a child and commands his ship to fire on the battlefield, disregarding his own army's safety
>Captain Marvel is in it. Enough said. She is of course completely OP and steals the show from absolutely everybody in the final fight
>Thanos' ship that caused devastation for everyone present since the beginning of the battle fires all its devastating cannons on Captain Marvel who suddenly appears. They have zero effect. Captain Marvel cuts through the ship like through butter and it crashes. Thanos looks at this in utter shock and terror, which is the second time we see him lose composure. In fact he looks like a little child whose favorite toys were destroyed by mommy. Take that, straight pink male.
>Captain Marvel arrives and takes gauntlet and then some women around her arrive and say "don't worry, she's got help" in broken African dialect.
>This is an exaggeratedly epic roundabout shot of exclusively female superheroes arriving/landing nearby, including Pepper in an Iron Man suit (female Iron Man basically confirmed), and going into battle to save the men who previously failed
>Captain Marvel gets the gauntlet from Peter Parker. We know she is the strongest character by far. She can just put it on and snap away Thanos' army. She doesn't. Instead she flies around with it to who knows where, which allows Thanos to cause an explosion to let it fly out of her grasp
>Why? Unknown.
this isnt a rant, it's a retelling. gay
>Thanos grabs gauntlet and Captain Marvel of course easily and without effort repeatedly stops him from doing a snap
>Thanos fucking gives her a harsh headbutt. She doesn't even fucking flinch. In fact she doesn't move a single millimeter, as if her position was hardcoded into the matrix and physics don't apply to her. Compare this to Thor, who was completely and utterly destroyed and rammed into the ground by an identical headbutt earlier (and that was while Captain America was simultaneously clinging to Thanos' back!)
>Captain Marvel is so strong that Thanos can only "defeat" her by removing a stone from the gauntlet and using it with his other hand against her. This is of course completely unprecedented, clearly making her by far the strongest enemy he fought
>Conclusion: Thanos utterly unimpressed by every single hero except by Wanda and Captain Marvel who completely ridiculously terrify and easily defeat him
>Thanos announces that he will, this time, completely eradicate the universe and create a new one in its stead. So that people will not be resentful over what they lost but instead grateful for what they have
Marvel ripping off DC yet again.
>Thanos finally wants to do the snap, but Iron Man holds his fist open again. He is of course easily thrown away.
>Thanos wants to do snap again, but the stones are missing from the gauntlet and it just makes a "clonk" sound! Tony Stark stole them, hahah! A fucking silly fucking joke in the middle of the climactic fight! Ha-ha-ha how funny! Please laugh! And Thanos is too dumb to feel that all the power streaming through his arm before is suddenly completely missing. Hahah! Dumbass Thanos hahah!
>Why tf didn't they do this on Titan if it's so easy?! Why tf didn't they do this on a million different occasions?
>Tony Stark - remember, a normal human - wields the gauntlet with all 6 stones and snaps Thanos and his army away. HOW?!? Remember when Quill had ONE stone in his hand and almost instantly disintegrated DESPITE being a Celestial, basically a god?
>Tony dies, but other than his arm (presumably) he looks perfectly fine and in shape. Wut.
>Quill is kicked in the nuts by Gamora from the past who doesn't remember him for being happy to see her again - because kicking men in the balls is funny. YAY QUEEN GO! Oh yeah, by the way, she KNEW at this point that her future self was his girlfriend. Nevertheless she inflicted a potentially dangerous injury of his genitals on him for laughs.
>Every single person in this movie trying to use the gauntlet does or attempts a snap. Why the fuck does it need to be a snap? Is this just stupid fanservice? There's no reason for it to be a snap, I'm pretty sure it would also work with closing the fist as other things often worked. The whole "with a snap" thing was just to show how easy it is, not some kind of cosmic rule on how to annihilate life with the gauntlet. This is pure stupid. "hey let's overdo this aspect until everyone is tired of it". But no, they keep doing a snap every time for no reason. How the fuck would Thanos from the past even know that he used a snap in the future?
>Why don't they bring Tony back to life with the stones? And how about Vision? etc etc.
>They need to return time stone to other universe so they can defend against evil, but the current universe has no time stone now. Wut, they're fucced.
Yeah bro, good stuff and completely justified. I only saw this on the subway because a guy beside me had it running on his laptop
I really wanted to keep it short, but there were so many issues I ended up doing a retelling so I can keep the overview lol. I'll probably do a shortened up version some other time, now I'm a bit exhausted.
same here. was it this based black man?
and the post credits??
ON ME
damn! we must have been on the same train fren!
yikes what an abortion. i feel bad for you capeshitters. do you think you've been screwed over worse than the star wars OT fans?
I, uhm, had to leave a station earlier than the guy in the subway who was sitting beside me watching it on his laptop, so I didn't see the credits stuff.
there's none
>Black Widow wins bc feminism
how to instantly detect basement incel
Good Lord, it isn't even an adaptation of Infinity Gauntlet anymore. What a clusterfuck.
>They need to return time stone to other universe so they can defend against evil, but the current universe has no time stone now. Wut, they're fucced.
Yep. And the Ancient Once also said the infinity stones together create the flow of time but Thanos destroyed them and nothing bad happened. What's the big fucking deal, then?
>Tony sits down and just invents controlled time travel in a matter of hours basically. "hah, that was easy"
BOX OF SCRAPS
*Subverts your adaptation.*
Nothing personal, incel.
*personnel
OP here, I forgot one that is very important:
>towards end after tony's funeral Thor and Valkyrie (you know, that impulsive drunk overpowered traitor bitch who enslaved him in Ragnarok) stand at a shoreline and Thor says he doesn't wanna be king anymore, he prefers cruising around with the Guardians of the Galaxy now. Why? Nobody knows. And he says to Valkyrie (I'm not making this up) "you're a natural leader" and repeatedly calls her majesty and whatnot. LOL
gamma is the highest end of the energy spectrum with the shortest wavelength. irl we really only see gamma bursts when stars merge or when they supernova. black holes also emit gamma radiation through an interaction known as hawking radiation. if it put out a lot of energy it would be detectable on the gamma end of the spectrum I guess whatever
You can break down how retarded this is way more easily.
Thanos noticed a very real problem,too much life and finite resources that are running out.
Thanos has a temporary, flawed solution that our heroes don't agree with (but they don't ever deny that the problem is very real).
Heroes UNDO the temporary solution Thanos applied AND-- they don't have any alternative solution. It's just back to square one, resources are still limited and there's too many people.
Great writing.
>Captain Marvel eventually announces she will leave. Raccoon questions why tf she is leaving. She says "because my movie isn't very popular."
>>Why tf didn't they do this on Titan if it's so easy?! Why tf didn't they do this on a million different occasions?
good point
in Infinity War they had to take off the gauntlet from his arm
now Iron Man can just take all the stones off in a sec like a magic trick
regarding ant man
>He got lucky and stumbled into the right quantum tunnel or whatever and came out exactly 5 years later. Right.
It's already been established how ant man's powers work. In his first movie he goes to the bookshelf dimension like in interstellar and then he uses love to get out of it.
Pottery. It rhymes.
They just didnt think about it user :)))
>Remember when Quill had ONE stone in his hand and almost instantly disintegrated DESPITE being a Celestial, basically a god?
It's funny that they want people to watch every movie to understand the whole story, but people who actually know what happens in the other movies can pick up the retarded stuff easily
I hope this is a case of it looks retarded on the page.
A kid could've probably written a better and more consistent story, I dont believe the writers to be so terrible they can barely manage to breathe, but I believe they have many corporate and personal agendas and rules that restrict them from making anything remotely close to the quality of a children's book.
I regret watching it. Wish I'd stuck to my plan of regarding IW as the end and not bother with the next one.
On one hand, it kinda just sounds like you just hate women and black people and should have sex
On the other hand It does sound pretty damn terrible regardless not gonna lie
I expected to be disappointed but from what I've seen so far it's just BAD.
all I want to know is did the pie maker also go into the stone realm like hugo weaving? did his character also morph into another actor? so many questions
Holy fuck dude, it's capeshit; quit nitpicking and let it go.
I liked the movie for what it was and thought it wrapped up the mcu as well as anything else would've been able to.
tfw Bill and Ted handled time travel better
lel, where can I watch this movie?
Logan was better than this movie imo
>>Black Widow wins bc feminism
Bro, the internet has warped your mind. Movies have been doing this for decades and nobody gave a shit until gamergate.
So what happens after thanos? Who is even badder than him?
>just have no standards bro
>wrapped up the mcu as well as anything else would've been able to.
Thor not king of asgard, to take Odin's place
>The age of white men is over
Yeah fuck that shit. THey're just dancing on Stan Lee's grave. He probably kept the goddamn jews in line
>>>Why tf didn't they do this on Titan if it's so easy?! Why tf didn't they do this on a million different occasions?
The key difference here is that it's the Stark gauntlet; Iron Man (seemingly) had a way to interact with/manipulate the stones that wouldn't have been possible with the OG gauntlet.
>>The age of white men is over
Are you incapable of watching a movie without getting absolutely buttblasted and bringing politics into it?
Broly
> Marvel ripping off DC yet again.
Also, half the anime villains.
>just have no standards bro
Bro the movie is good. But then again, I can watch a movie with a talking raccoon without trying to dissect every point of logic in the plot.
>watches Lion King
>wtf dude, lions can't talk. why tf is Scar black? black lions don't exist. this is fucking ridiculous, a meercat would never befriend a warthog.
but he took the stones from Thanos' gauntlet, something they couldn't do in infinity war for no reason
Literally this is the 2nd marvel movie I've ever complained about. Which 2? Oh, the ones right after Stan Lee died
Thread reads better in comic book guy voice
Why are these long-winded posts always made by /pol/ browsers? Could you jam any more "political" crying into your criticisms you pathetic baby? Why are all of the most active users on this site the lowest, dumbest people with the worst perspectives?
>what is internal logic
stupid fallacy shills
No, Thanos was wearing the Stark gauntlet.
>t. just finished watching the movie 5 minutes ago
I don't like capeshit but I watched 6 of the marvel ones and infinty war. It was a decent flick and it seemed like a good ending to the whole story. If they actually finished on this the MCU would be redeemable because it actually had an unexpected ending.
AYO CAPTAIN AMERICA IS DA BLACK MAN NOW, DAS ME YO
>mod fag made a sticky about spoilers
>everyone defending the retard stronk womin sues
Is this r/movies now?
Long story short: we don't like captain marvel.
Time to bail from the MCU.
If you think he had anything to do with *any* of these movies other than a symbolic advisory role, you are sorely mistaken. dude's been senile for like 5 years.
kek that's exactly my point, the film follows it's own internal logic just fine. For example:
>How the fuck does Thanos know how to time travel? From looking at incomplete video recordings of Tony Stark building a time machine?! Oh thats right he got a flask of Pym particles. Naturally he knows how to use them and this ancient human technology from the 70s or so suddenly allows interstellar traveller aliens like himself to invent time travel.
Not a problem when the film had just established that Thanos had full access to their plans via Nebula's memory.
I read all your points and mostly agree. the flaws you point out are all/mostly all valid. a few more things that make it unsatisfying:
- Character arcs left unfinished/meaningless:
- What is up with bucky?
- Hulk/Banner end up having one hell of a weird "development" with his final form as prof. hulk
- Widow/Banner was forgotten (except for one comment why widow)? lel wtf
- Vision is not mentioned except implicitly by Wanda
- sooooo, what exactly was the consequence of civil war now? they made up rather quick
Other stuff:
- Thor is a comic relief again and declines his position as king meh also he was nerfed again sigh fuck this shit I hate random plot induced nerfs
- Cap > Thor confirmed due to their performance vs Thanos
- The movie got a little boring here and there; should have been 30 minutes shorter
- how cringy was hawkeye vs widow?? sigh
[\spoiler]
Why the fuck did I buy my tickets in advance?
Well, you can always try to find ways to justify nonsense I suppose. Same as people defended Infinity War's plotholes with "it will be explained in Endgame". Disney must be getting so much benefit of the doubt they are probably millionaires of the doubt now
holla, my nigga
Let's be real here; was Yea Forums ever going to like this movie?
Have sex
>the fagnite gaymer scene is real
worst part of the movie
unironically looks a like a parody
> hating black people
nothing wrong with that
>Cap > Thor confirmed due to their performance vs Thanos
>WW2 scientists manage to create a supersoldier more powerful than an Asgardian god from some limpwristed boyscout beta boy
seems legit
>seems legit
yeah well not sure if you have seen the movie or not but see for yourself what you think of the second battle vs thanos
post the webm
I really need that footage
Its garbage but normies eat it up. Eat the stinky garbage you fucking normies. Eat it.
No I know, you are absolutely right. This just shows how retarded the movie is. I didn't mean to disagree with your observation, just to mock the movie logic.
So, it’s basically girl power: the movie? That sure worked for Star Wars.
Capeshit fans are more forgiving to being cucked. Theyll open mouth support their balls being chopped off.
But the age of white men IS over
There is one tracking shot of every female character standing in various action poses, but the day is still saved by the holy trinity of Tony, Steve and Thor.
Probably the last Marvel ensemble movie where white dudes will win the day, but still.
So captain Marvel is stronger than an actual god? Absolute state of capeshit
To be fair, Thor REALLY let himself go. Dude got tubby as fuck.
Wonder woman can solo captain marvel
Widow-Banner has been resolved in IW. Basically just sweeping the trash Whedon left under the rug.
Nice blog
>>Hulk is of course easily punched out of his body and thus defeated by the female sorceress, bc MUH women power
Dude he wasn't trying to fight her and she's the sorcerer supreme. How did you think that was going to end?
>but the day is still saved by the holy trinity of Tony, Steve and Thor.
but it's extremely strongly demonstrated through the film's logic that this is basically just so that the fans don't lose their shit. it's clear that the women would be perfectly able to do it on their own, Tony just happens to get the right timing
Yet thanos cant
> Thanos could be anywhere in the Universe, billions of light years away.
> *ping* There he is!
It was cringy moment and didnt mean anything in the end. Would've been more meaningful if those wymin made team effort passing the gauntlet to each other to safety but they ended up fighting separately.
>Widow-Banner has been resolved in IW
care to remind me how? I honestly cannot remember
When that women scene happened, did everyone cheer at your cinema? Mine did.
It's all so tiresome
Still travels at the speed of light, so Thanos would have to be close, within a few light years.
Idiotic.
>> Thanos could be anywhere in the Universe, billions of light years away.
Why didnt he kill everyone in the first movie?? All the Revengers??
Niggah trying to find logic in a movie about people with superpowers made for kids
>"Hey guys, Sharon Carter here. Sorry to hear about Mr. Stark, that must have been really hard for you all. By the way, where's Steve?"
>Wheres Steve?
He went back to the 40s to not be obligated to live together with blacks, asians and mexicans
Wait, is Fat Thor the real Thor? People have been saying it was an alternate universe Thor. Are you saying it's the same Thor that's been with us this whole time?
Yes, it is literally the same identical Thor. And yes, an alternate dimension is the only thing that would have been remotely sensible.
whilst i giggled at this comment you surely acknowledge and realise yourself how your analogy (fallacy) isnt remotely on the mark right?
Good Lord...
Why do they hate Thor Ragnarok so much?
Are they jealous Waititi came in and made one of the best in the MCU and made people give a shit about Thor?
But that's fucking dumb. That's going against everything his character stood for.
Thanos didn't destroy them, he just split them into atoms across the universe. It's like a "good luck finding all of those together" kind of thing. If they really were destroyed, the universe would implode anyways.
Did you realize how dumb your comment is??
was it actually natalie portman in the thor 2 scene
she looked weird like she was cgi or something
Thor's character doesn't stand for anything anymore. Now he's been lumped into the Asguardians of the Galaxy because hes nothing more than a comic relief for MCU like Pratt. And they want to do a duo comedy superhero movie to crush Shazam 2 when that comes out.
How did Mjolnir come back?
>Thanos didn't destroy them,
>he just split them into atoms across the universe
Capeshitters senoras y senores
He kinda lost his way after kiling Thanos. Nowhere to go and nothing to do to fix things right so he turned to alcohol. He killed Thanos out of desperation as well. But I think her mother played her role really well to bring his sense back. Was welling up at their brief moment together. One of the plus points of the movie.
The time travel made absolutely no sense
And neither did their retarded "lmao your past self is your future self and vice versa so you can't alter shit!" explanation
Pelo teu cu, filho da puta
One of the worst scenes in the entire film. She has no right to play a Norse icon and yet that’s exactly what Marvel have done. She can’t even act.
Thats uh, not what happens in Lucifer.
Sharon is a home wrecker Thot that only exists to kill the Stucky ship
The women in Marvel are utter shit with just a few exceptions in Scarlet Witch, Black Widow in some films and Pepper. Garbage like Valkyrie, MJ, Peggy and Cap Marvel are embarrassing.
It's not really a problem. It's Malthusian retardation, especially when you're talking about the entire universe and not one planet.
But he’s right. They use Norse myth and legend but shit all over it, any other culture but white and the blue ticks would be howling about racism and appropriation. Why the fuck should we accept degradation and gutter level standards?
You mean people with taste, cultural respect, high standards and a lack of NPC brainwashing?
Have you considered the second part is related to the first part? Is it just a coincidence that the movies become shit when they borrow the woke elements of the current comics?
Yes, this is why IW is bullshit
bruh literally every villain does this
That doesn't mean small women beating men in physical contests hasn't always been stupid. Maybe Hollywood warped your mind?
>>In one scene, Thanos - with ease - defeats a dual-hammer wielding lightning-buzzing lightning-eye Thor and Captain America simultaneously- WITHOUT the gauntlet
you forgot iron man
>ugly pig faced black Valkyrie
>best in the MCU
Pick one.
does it have a post credits scene?
FUCK
YOU
I
LIKED
IT
HAVE SEX ]
Marvel is pretty damn explicit about their political agenda, but yeah it's totally us bringing politics into it. We're just buttblasted. It has nothing to do with the fact that they make garbage stories about garbage characters, like Captain Marvel and her extrajudicial Minority Report prisons. If you're going to make a character into a feminist icon, at least don't ruin the character first.
They ruined Bucky’s character, he’s nothing but a background character now, and Cap suddenly goes all mopey over Peggy. It’s a shitty, shitty end for those two, Cap regressing to moping about her, when she was never an interesting or attractive character to begin with.
>retard can't handle the most basic of capeshit explanations
Pathetic.
toe fungus is in the movie, of course not
OP went out of his way to frame it negatively. He would have to completely rewrite it to make it sound unbiased so we could have a legitimate reaction to it. Everything he wrote here makes him sound like a whiny pissbaby.
>Cap suddenly moping about Peggy
Are you being ironic or just purely retarded?
Yea Forums sort of liked IW for a brief period
>WOWIE ZOWIE
i think the OP need some sex, that's all :)
>More than that, why did they go there during the battle of New York while everything was hectic? Why not just steal it from the research lab Loki stole it from? I guess that would make too much sense.
Wasn't it cause they wanted to minimise the thier time travels so they went back on that specific moment so they could get 3 stones?
>Despite him of course still being able to shoot webs as demonstrated in the scene directly before this one.
you wanted him to shoot his web at god? there was nothing near to cling to.
Why are you people so obsessed with sex?
>Injecting your leftist propoganda onto the biggest movie of all time, while emotions and hype blind you from the obvious brainwashing
Clever Disney. Underhanded, but clever.
you are a fucking retard
Do the Russos hate cap or something?
Cap should have gotten the heroic death
people TALKING
IN A FUCKING MOVIE? HOW DARE THEY!
jesus fuck I had one god damn request and that was they leave the wakanda tribal shit out of the movie.
Marvel cunts.
>every female
>and Spidey
I'd choose him over them desu.
I want to believe this is all trolling but I fear it isn’t. Here they had a good opportunity to show the original 6 avengers teaming up to kick thanos’ ass in a hard fought battle, but they choose side characters. I would have preferred the “black widow kicks thanos in his infinity stones” than the garbage being reported. Fuck.
Seconded
>pretending something makes sense when it doesn't
okay explain it to me then you smart little faggot
except you can't explain how thors magic hammer jumped timelines. you can't explain how cap managed to go back and live his liftetime in the past. Does that mean that in his timeline when it reached 2012 that there was no battle of NY that he was present for??? you can't explain how Loki blackhole teleported away with the tesseract/infinity stone yet they manage to still get all the stones from further in the past destroy everything then put them back...okay where is loki then?? What about the tesseract? you can't explain why they drum up a huge fuss about returning everything back to exactly the way it is, they literally have a magic visual representation about it with tilda swinton, but then allow time fuckery like cap staying behind etc to occur. YOU CAN'T EXPLAIN SHIT BECAUSE ITS NONSENSICAL GARBAGE
you stupid insect it should take less than 5 seconds to notice the glaring plotholes listed above. It's not even all of them.
Most of the complaints I read here are just too retarded. I guess I've been overrating average Yea Forums posters IQ for too long now.
>while emotions and hype blind you from the obvious brainwashing
Funny, when this happened i could hear groans throughout the cinema. It was fucking distracting.
Thank you Ironman for saving the say once again
Thanos punching Danvers clean out of the battlefield was satisfying to see considering I half expected she was gonna singlehandedly win.
That shit about destroying the Infinity Stones has been pissing me off since the last movie. It’s fucking retarded.
It’s all true. All of it
Holy shit you sound like a fag
The fiendish mouse thrusts his liberal agenda upon us all in this movie.
Oh by the way, you’re so gay it frightens me
he unironically represents the frail masculinity
pistolou
cuck
Don't blame Mickey, Walt wasn't a commie faggot. Blame the jews who ruined his company
>democracy
Are you guys really this dumb you cant understand some of the most basic plots of a Marvel movie? Jesus christ.
found the emcel
>Disney
>Giant monopolistic corporation
>Left-wing
The planet was named Garden and she knew it was his retirement plan
Everybody understood
But keep being dumb
"Have sex" "have sex" You know what? I'd rather never have sex again than watch the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.
Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody, just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.
>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."
I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.
>being this retarded
All of that is explainable but I dont want to spoonfeed you brainlet. Keep thinking that you're a smart snowflake, buddy.
Shut up
Dont even try to justify your childish fantasies
who’s in charge of the avengers now?
Same. I have regret after reading this thread. Should have waited for the DVD at my local library.
Yes, Disney, a private corporation is spreading leftism.
Only thing this shit spread is propaganda related with neoliberalism, militarism and "America is the good boy"
Nick Fury obviously. He has to make a new team as evident in FFH.
Oh God that's actually fucking horrid
cares more about uncle tony stark than uncle ben
god mcu raped spider-man
You really are retarded
>because it actually had an unexpected ending.
lel
How the fuck did Cap returned the soul stone? Did he just gave it back to Red Skull, made a joke at him and F'd at Natasha's body?
that's some weak ass shitposting tbphwy
Thor is no longer the king of asgard (gives up power to a black woman who enslaved him), captain america is now an old useless boomer white man and gives up his power to a black man even though bucky (who has super soldier syrum and is about as strong) is standing right there. Iron man dies and they are now replacing him with captain mary sue. Banner and Tony Stark are no longer the smartest people, it's a 16 year old black woman from a fake country of black warriors named wakanda holy shit they are really cranking the poz dial up. At this pace we'll have a transgender gay crippled black HIV infected captain america by 2030.
Thanos; Donald Trump (Marvel Studios/AP Photo)
Peak superhero? Not even close: How one movie genre became the guiding myth of neoliberalism
What if the most popular movie genre of our age is really the immune reaction of a dying economic system?
salon.com
> Infinity War destroyed Hulk's character
> Endgame destroyed Thor's character and Captain America's character
The only character somewhat unscaved throughout the series is Iron Man
>Of course no US Army or anything like that appears
Good, fuck burgerclaps.
God, this thing sounds like a really bad soap opera. All this time wasted on rushing loose ends on character development at the worst possible time on the most contrived ways.
the movie series already established that they have FTL through a bunch of mechanisms like the bispark and all of the bullshit realtime communications. I'm willing to forgo that since they at least went with something not made up for the real half. Also that's hulk's forte so it fits the theme.
segregation is a good thing
One of the reason why I ain't watching this shit in the theatre
thanks disney
they squirted when black panther came
Can somebody tell me what does Ken Jeong do in the movie?
Disney. *check*
Giant monopolistic corporation: *check*
Left-wing: *check*
What part of this is wrong?
God, i'd love spunk on her face so bad.
Something about the way she carries herself makes me wanna hatefuck her til i'm dry.
That's just your toxic masculinity speaking and trying to assert dominance.
have sex :DDDDD
>> Endgame destroyed Thor's character
that was ragnarok
He has a two second scene where he looks at a tv with a fake beard and glasses
Well said
Will little girls be inspired to become engineers and world leaders after watching this movie?
>past: a skilled female warrior beats a competent male warrior because of skills and or physical prowess
>present: a skinny 70lbs midget feminist with a week of rex kwon do overpowers a 7ft 400lbs martial arts expert with 90 years of experience
cow towing to feminist propaganda doesn't get you laid
t. someone who's had sex
youtube.com
She's got the lesbian forehead, eyes of a jaded teenager, and the facial features of a 12 year old girl.
She was the only bad thing about the movie and not even that bad. She is pretty by the black standard and average by the mixed standard. The movie was 8/10 easy.
The scene where all the girls grouped up during the final fight like there was a role call had me facepalming.
Still doesn't mean she isn't a blackwash of what should be the whitest character in the universe.
Everyone should just pirate the hell out of this movie. The version streaming online isn’t too shabby.
And not a very good retelling either
Eh, she's not a knockout sure. But i can see why someone might find her cute in a homely, girl-next-door kinda way, if not for the overwhelming SMUGGG aura she projects all the time.
got a link?
He's yet to scientifically rip it to shreds
Can't find.
Can someone tell me how the FUCK the Asgardians are still alive after Thanos killed everyone and destroyed their ship in the beginning of Infinity War?
Nice try Yidsney employee
Too busy sexual abusing women
some escaped
For some reason the writers forgot that they were killed before thanos snapped his fingers.
Seeing the "hatefuck" part of the original post, I think he sees that aura of unwarranted superiority as part of the """"charm""""
NDGT pointed out he could have simply doubled the resources
On the other hand, Steve points out that Earth's environment has started to steadily recover following the snap.
>On the other hand, Steve points out that Earth's environment has started to steadily recover following the snap.
Only if it selectively killed off the biggest polluters on the planet, the Africans, the Chinese and the Pajeets.
Making overpopulation Thanos' motivations is pretty stupid when you realize that overpopulation is the only problem we face today. I don't know what the fuck kind of message they're trying to portray with these movies.
Kill white cishet christian conservative men and vote blue
Realistically they're saying "Fuck the future, we need to work on women and black representation in media."
Him having a boner for Death unironically made more sense
Only the Power stone fucks the user.
Time, Mind and Space have been shown to be usable.
The Aether can fuck you up too!
Message? It's capeshit, my guy.
In real life, women don't defeat men. Grow the fuck up and acknowledge reality, you fucking child. Grownups don't scream 'incel!'.
how long was your ride jesus
Thor decaps Thanos like 20 mins into the film. The avengers lose and for next 5 years he lives drinking away his sorrows living with Korg and meek
Have sex.
if you watched the movie (there are plenty of cams going around at this point), you'd know black widow only 'wins' by throwing herself off a cliff and sticking her grapple onto hawkey. stupid, sure, but not like she beat him in an arm wrestling contest.
>cow towing to feminist propaganda doesn't get you laid
kek, because that's why we're all on Yea Forums shitposting, to get laid.
>somebody doesnt agree with me!
>but i know im right!
>REEEEE fuck you, incel faggot! have sex!
lmao just retards throwing their shit around because they're too invested in cash-grab capeshit.
Saw endgame yesterday. Holy fuck Brie LARPson is a shit actor.
That was my first time watching her in a film. Her facial expressions are hilariously bad.
>who knows why or where
...the van? Are you retarded?
THEY EXPLAINED THE TIME TRAVEL SEVERAL TIMES.
Its not like BTTF.
YOUR timeline cant change
Going back in time just leads to creating a fucked up offshoot when they steal the stones. They return to their own timeline and their past remains intact. They basically fuck over other worldlines.
INITIATE INTERCOURSE
kek
>Nevertheless she inflicted a potentially dangerous injury of his genitals on him for laughs
God I wish that was me
Killing 50% of humanity and sterilizing 40% more is acceptable.
See that none of the Avengers say that he is wrong about the overpopulation
holy shit
Its not BTTF. they explain their version of timetravel. Going back doesnt affect the present.
She even did the "I'm roleplaying" batman deepvoice in all her scenes
They explain the Time travel like 3 seperate times yet people dont understand Time travel has been done countless different ways.
Ex machina
But the races aren't equal. He's also not a Ecologist because he just FUCKED the ratio or predators to prey, his motivations are retarded
>slow
>pointless
>unnecessary
>lots of talking
>$300 million superhero action blockbuster
Fuck off with your ex machina capeshitter
wait so tony is dead and thor is fat? wut lol fuck this shit.
There wax some legitimately good quips in the film.
ex machina? You mean when Brie Larson overpowers a complete infinity gauntlet but can't take the power stone? You mean when Stark somehow steals all 5 infinity stones off of thanos' gauntlet in a second and a half?
EVERYBODY KEEPS POSTING THE SPOILER WITH THE IMAGE OF THE GIRL BUTT AS THE THUMBNAIL
I DONT GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THIS MOVIE I JUST WANT THE BUTT PIC
>EVERYBODY KEEPS POSTING THE SPOILER WITH THE IMAGE OF THE GIRL BUTT AS THE THUMBNAIL
where?
Agreed but about 75% of it is on point.
>They don't call Captain Marvel
Based. This is literally what everyone wanted.
yeah I agree it was pretty stupid
>I believe they have many corporate and personal agendas and rules that restrict them from making anything remotely close to the quality of a children's book.
They literally have to follow a list of guidelines while writing a script.
I'm not joking.
She does show up and take thanos on 1v1 with a complete gauntlet though, you can't get more feminist wankstain than that.
Is the Captain Marvel post credit scene compatible with Endgame?
She arrives here and the first time they meet her, she appears behind them.
In the film, they all meet her outside Avengers HQ as she lands the ship.
>>Captain Marvel flies in and grabs him. She's so strong he cannot move at all in her grab and is made to answer questions. To be completely fair, he looks very weakened, but it's still retarded.
It's not retarded at all. The guy was nearly fucking dead and he got ambushed by like 4 different people. There is nothing wrong with this.
It isn't. Then again the entire movie isn't since it retcons a bunch of stuff.
> Thanks didn't play the heroes against eachother with the promise of them being able to use the stones for their own ends
Dropped
Tearing up rn
I think the world would be a better place without superhero movies
Very dumb post.
Do you think he would kill younglings to save the MCU?
>>Thanos fucking gives her a harsh headbutt. She doesn't even fucking flinch. In fact she doesn't move a single millimeter, as if her position was hardcoded into the matrix and physics don't apply to her. Compare this to Thor, who was completely and utterly destroyed and rammed into the ground by an identical headbutt earlier (and that was while Captain America was simultaneously clinging to Thanos' back!)
She got her power from a fucking infinity stone. What did you expect.
who fucking cares I lived with these movies too but was 24 when Iron man came out
This is the state of western men
How do dozens of 6/10 capeshit movies do this to people?
>She got her power from a fucking infinity stone
And she can take ALL the stones, but not the power stone by itself. The power levels are incoherent
So did Wanda and Vision.....gauntlet Thanos can barely touch her, seems a bit off.
>>How the fuck does Thanos know how to time travel? From looking at incomplete video recordings of Tony Stark building a time machine?! Oh thats right he got a flask of Pym particles. Naturally he knows how to use them and this ancient human technology from the 70s or so suddenly allows interstellar traveller aliens like himself to invent time travel.
You're an actual brainlet, Nebula was the one that brought him through using the time machine at the Avengers facility.
Wouldn't he be baby thanos without the special watch that stark made?
they keep posting this and I just want the original pic
>MODS THIS IS SPOILERS MARKING IT AS SUCH
Because when you invest that much time in escaping the suffering of life with these characters, it tends to be pretty heavy on these kids when it's over.
Captain Marvel is barely in the movie and barely does anything. Her little bout with Thanos was pretty cringey though but he still btfo of her.
Sauce on the blonde chick with the star spangled ass?
He wasn't using any of the stones against her until he took the power stone out. Remember he needs to clench the gauntlet to use it and she was stopping him from doing that.
yes that is what I am looking for
Why are we still here? Just to suffer.
Couldn't he just take the reality stone and turn Marvel and Ironman into butterflies?
Brazilian user here. That's Juju (Juliana) Salimeni.
youtube.com
Imagine the smell
Ur mom lol
Thanks monkey bro. Brazilian chicks are the finest in the world.
nigger
>>Injecting your leftist propoganda onto the biggest movie of all time, while emotions and hype blind you from the obvious brainwashing
lol the first scene depicting "normal life" after five years is literally a guy saying he finally asked some other GUY on a date.
I still had more than two and a half hours to go and I was already dreading this shit
This. I'm glad I streamed it because I'm never watching it again.
Sad thing is this doesn't even sound farfetched.
This is the original post
>worse than the star wars OT fans
not sure that's possible at this point
Fuck Disney.
DAS RITE WHITE BOI DIS OUR CRIB NAO
still no one responds to me. sam neal touched the stone and went to the cliff place, what about ronin? why isn't red skull part of a band of rejects including people like the girl who grabbed the stone at the collector? shouldn't there be a bunch of people at these places considering how ancient these stones are?
breakfast club: avengers
There was a theory hulk loses an arm was that true?
hulk can canonically regrow most of his body so that is not even a concern
He basically turns into Thanos if that's what you mean.
Hulk doesn't even throw a single punch in this movie
>>Hulk is of course easily punched out of his body and thus defeated by the female sorceress, bc MUH women power.
Lmao you really do need to have sex, not meming
why didn't you just reprogram the synapses to work collectively?
fyi I've ben watching this movie in b&w and it's pure kino
The NPC meme is real.
>lel hAvE sEx
obsessed
nah falcon is gonna convert to islam and america will implode
based
its Eric Masterson
>The whole "with a snap" thing was just to show how easy it is, not some kind of cosmic rule on how to annihilate life with the gauntlet.
I was really hoping that aspect of it wasn't going to be run into the ground... Are there any godlike feats the gauntlet pulls off other than killing a lot of people/bringing them back to life?
>The absolute state of american "men"
>>Every single person in this movie trying to use the gauntlet does or attempts a snap. Why the fuck does it need to be a snap? Is this just stupid fanservice? There's no reason for it to be a snap, I'm pretty sure it would also work with closing the fist as other things often worked. The whole "with a snap" thing was just to show how easy it is, not some kind of cosmic rule on how to annihilate life with the gauntlet. This is pure stupid. "hey let's overdo this aspect until everyone is tired of it". But no, they keep doing a snap every time for no reason. How the fuck would Thanos from the past even know that he used a snap in the future?
fucking based, i had the same problem.
BRAAAAAAAAAAAPP
australian
We wuz Norse space kangs n' sheit!