Heroes in Hollywood

>chased away a crow that was trying to kill it
That's just nature retard, now the crow doesn't get to eat

baby raccoon, sincerely /an/

looks nothing like the squirrels we have in the UK

so now a crow goes hungry who would have quickly killed the squirell, and you have to stand there and watch it suffer near death. gr8 patton you cuck

Imagine the guy that posts patton oswalt twitter screens on Yea Forums, now that is a loser

fpbp

believe it or not squirrels are fucking rare in commiefornia

kek
yeah i have, due to the posture it didnt look like any squirrel i ever saw, kindly kill yourself immediately

I live in California and you're retarded. I see squirrels all the time.

Fucking libtard. Allowing the crow to do its thing would have a) put the squirrel out of its misery and b) provided food to another animal.

lmao fucking rekt

imagine that, you can kill your wife but you can't kill a squirrel

fags eatin up all the nuts

FPBP

squirrels dont live on palm trees, if you're somewhere near the coast yeah no squirrels

wouldnt animal control kill it? It's not like they're running a veterinarian program
No they aren't, but they're probably rare to see in Oswalt's lifestyle

>Watching crows create hooked tools to fish worms out of wood
>Watching crows use water displacement to get to a piece of food

Vegan/Animal lover here,

Let nature run its course. The squirrel was already dying and the crow was starving or had to feed its babies. Now that the crow and its babies were cheated out of their meal, the crow will go hungry and its babies will die.

>Now that the crow and its babies were cheated out of their meal, the crow will go hungry and its babies will die.
is this bad? what do crows do for me? squirrels are better

>Vegan/Animal lover here,
why would you weaken your reasonable argument by announcing yourself as a faggot?

Apparently crows aren't part of nature

Attached: notnature.png (985x253, 36K)

Attached: D3pdTSFXoAAD8th.png (540x341, 216K)

He did it to show that even a raging faggot like him knows what he should have done on that situation, nothing.

What is his way of thinking?
>animals can eat other animals as long as I'm not there watching
Or
>all animals should be vegan
?

RENT FREE

lol, reminds me of that IASIP episode when they save the bunny

he can't keep getting away with it

#Justice4Michelle

Imagine getting sued for slander by a rich man.

That fucking show has an episode for everything

Probably the latter.
California rots the brain.

nice

>what do they do for me
typical human bullshit. crows do plenty of useful shit. If it wasn’t for us you’d be surrounded by bugs.

Poor squirrel

Attached: theflyingsquirrel.jpg (126x196, 6K)

maybe it's time to take some time off from the internet, Patton.

What?

Attached: 1551510955817.gif (300x168, 285K)

Remember when Hollywood stopped #KONY2012

i love how they also combine two nonsensical plots for no discernable reason other than to having the characters meat

>baby in the house?
>baby in the house!

I recognise that squirrel what's it from?

I live 10 miles out of LA and I have hawks and squirrels and coyotes and shit. it's not that unusual.

fake, if you were really from /an/ you'd know that it's a brown recluse

Feeding her drugs that resulted in her death is not "murder".

Attached: 1555352700260.jpg (745x483, 274K)

The Tick

How many meds are you on?

>worked as waiter
>got order for two glasses of whiskey
>one on the rocks
>bring them out
>guy starts complaining that the other guy got more in his glass
>his friend has to explain to him what water displacement is
>staring on, utterly baffled that there are people more ignorant of how the world works than fucking birds
>these retarded people can afford to come to that place and order expensive shit
Really put things into perspective and made getting better work and pay a lot easier of a goal.

Attached: peter-gabriel.jpg (1018x700, 50K)

stop bullying squirrels
dumb meme people spread about Patton

>is this bad?

Of course it's bad. Once you educate yourself as to why you should let nature from running its course, you'll feel instinctively bad when you prevent it from happening.

>humans are meant to eat animals

On a scientific level, no we aren't.

me eating animals and saving a squirrel is nature running its course

What, you gonna ask me if I have anything to give ya? fat chance cunt, you killed your wife with meds.

Technically so is jizzing on the bird and taking a shit in the dying squirrel, it's all natural functions. What is your point?

because you just agreed that your reasoning doesn't support your conclusion

RENT FREE

Shithole immigration is terrible for the environment, in 20 years I imagine most common creatures wouldn’t be found there

I can understand if you were a vegan and passionate about the lives of animals and insects, but you're not. You're basically eating a steak while holding a protest sign that says, "save the cows".

>truth
>dumb meme
Its not a meme. The dude literally murdered his wife.

that is literally me in real life

I rehabilitated a baby squirrel into the wild. They are actually pretty smart animals, and they are extremely friendly. Fuck you.

>this thread
>these are the same people who claim "liberals aren't even humans"

Attached: 1556062658511.png (402x400, 241K)

>you hate society yet you live in it~
wew

reminder that patton oswalt's dead wife caught the golden state killer. reminder that the proud pigs will never admit it

Attached: powerful.png (507x585, 38K)

who are you quoting?

someone photoshop his wife in the pic

Reminder that Patton Oswalt is the golden state killer and he killed his wife because of her book.

whom are you quotating?

Just put a pillow over its head. It worked for your wife.

It doesn't mean I help those living in it.

>I only help my kind

Save the cows so we can eat them later

whomst are you quoting?

>He didn't get injured by nature

Has she ever been in nature? violence is extremely natural

Not him, but squirrels are complete assholes. After they broke a third bird feeder, they get the shotgun on sight now. They take turns eating and stashing seeds and never let the birds on the feeder, draining the entire thing in less than a day.
I must have killed 500 tree rats by now.

Classic fucking liberal demanding the government step in and solve a problem rather than just picking up the fucking squirrel yourself and nursing it back to health.

What a faggot group of people

You're right, it's actually manslaughter.

These
You're retarded

the only proofs are that oswalt disliked drumpf

>could put it in a box and take it to a 24 hour vet
>take a selfie instead
only in california

i dont think so. i see em all the damn time near my campus and near my own house

it's just personal preference really.

Squirrels are rare in coastal areas, ie with palm trees. If you live somewhere with normal trees there's squirrels like everywhere else

Um yes it is.

Palm trees aren't really native to California, they were grown at the turn of the 20th century. Only palm trees that grew naturally here are in the desert.

Except she didn’t solve it. She listened to a bunch of true crime podcast like the rest of us and wrote it down and she’s part of the ((tribe)) so they made her notes into a book.

I cannot binge king of queens because of THIS FUCKING SJW ASSHOLE.
I absolutely LOATHE this pretentious fuck.

>cute girl on a bike
>hits a squirrel
>she stops
>figure she's going to freak out
>goes back and stomps on its head

Attached: 33930.jpg (400x400, 20K)

>Her parents were Irish American. They grew up Irish Catholic.
who do you work for?

She married into the tribe close enough.

>Interfering with nature
Now the squirrel will suffer and the crow will go hungry. Great job, bro!

wife her

When will the magapedes leave Yea Forums and have sex? The world will never know, user...

Attached: 1546933104444.jpg (498x422, 121K)

Attached: 1530637998023.jpg (2472x3296, 1.71M)

I think people are all turning retarded.

>squirrels don't fully understand the purpose of certain human inventions
wow that's crazy

Now the crow will starve.

Crows also remember faces of those who wronged them

Based

based

A normal individual would google it, but why miss out on the chance to virtue signal?

Assblasted tourists WILL find a way to be mad about this.

What? There are almost more squirrels than hobos at any park in LA dude.

ßased

>What are the most heroic things a celebrity has done?
Come out as someone who knew about a scandal but did nothing about it for the sake of their career, once it's been exposed by someone other than them.

Incel

I'd rather have someone do good and virtue signal while doing it than not doing good at all.

SAD!

Attached: what a fucking tragedy.jpg (736x296, 36K)

;_;7 See you Space Cowboy

Birds > squirrels

F

Attached: 337F1578-AF4A-4A7C-A404-2E9AC9036E3B.jpg (1920x802, 119K)

>saving a squirrel
>good
do you know how many dogs are gassed every day for merely existing? gtfo of here

>crow was probably starving, now he might die having spent all that energy with no reward
>his children will die too
>the squirrel will have suffered longer for nothing
>this shitty thread was made on Yea Forums
truly a net loss for the universe in all regards

Hopefully its pit-bulls.

>Why are you putting that fire out? Don't you know there's a bigger fire in Africa?

brainlet

are you retarded

you missed the point of that post entirely
well done brainlet

Attached: jt2094un60294u6.png (480x444, 234K)

That is literally the retarded argument you were making.

>why care? this other thing care too?
Brainlet-tier shit.

my cat eats squirrels all the time

what a fucking faggot

squirrels will never be endangered

Once upon a time, there was an old man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach every morning before he began his work. Early one morning, he was walking along the shore after a big storm had passed and found the vast beach littered with starfish as far as the eye could see, stretching in both directions.
Off in the distance, the old man noticed a small boy approaching. As the boy walked, he paused every so often and as he grew closer, the man could see that he was occasionally bending down to pick up an object and throw it into the sea. The boy came closer still and the man called out, “Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?”
The young boy paused, looked up, and replied “Throwing starfish into the ocean. The tide has washed them up onto the beach and they can’t return to the sea by themselves,” the youth replied. “When the sun gets high, they will die, unless I throw them back into the water.”
The old man replied, “But there must be tens of thousands of starfish on this beach. I’m afraid you won’t really be able to make much of a difference.”
The boy bent down, picked up yet another starfish and threw it as far as he could into the ocean. Then he turned, smiled and said, “It made a difference to that one!”

Attached: 1491993593188.png (547x1198, 248K)

birds, squirrels, most other basic life forms > you

dilate, sweaty!

This guys a fucking retard

simply based.

Seeing tragedy first hand can be a turning point in changing people's perception towards eating animals.

Witnesses an animal breathe its last breath is heart wrenching and haunting. Those without compassion lack souls and will frankly never earn them.

they are both vermin

or the Crow that attacked it was trying to eat it

I love squirrels too but jesus christ ITS A SQUIRREL. The world will find the strength to move on.

Based

What was your point then, retard?

Bobcat? theres a stray Persian that eats baby rabbits on my property but the squirrels just jump a tree and escape.

>this awful reading comprehension
The problem isn't doing small good deeds when larger problems are out there. The problem is doing something as worthless as saving an already dying squirrel or tossing starfish into the ocean, and thinking you've accomplished something "good." Starfish dry up, and birds kill rodents, get over it. Go spend your time doing something that's actually good and will actually better the world instead of seeing a natural occurrence, stopping it, then patting yourself on the back, you fucking idiots.

he throws in starfish for free

>soulless nihilistic boomer vs soulful idealistic zoomer
Dare I say, this story has aged like a fine wine.

>doing something as worthless as saving an already dying squirrel
Explaining why empathy is a paramount human virtue would be useless when you're this much of a sociopathic freak.

it made a difference to that squirrel

>get over it
You don't seem to have grasped the message of the story. Read it again.

>advocating for people to do truly good deeds makes me a sociopath
But you're celebrating a crow being at risk of starving now. So wouldn't that make you the sociopath? Or maybe it just makes you a fucking idiot?

Empathy is what makes us human, user. If we didn't have it we'd be just animals.

Whometh are thou quoting?

This is Bernie Goetz. Six years ago, Bernie found a wounded squirrel in Central Park. One of its legs was torn off. He immediately brought it back to his apartment and nursed it back to health. The two are now inseparable and the squirrel likes to ride around on Bernie's back. The City of New York has said that it is illegal to keep a pet squirrel and has kept him tied up in court over it for years, but he intends to simply continue to waste the city's time until his little buddy dies of old age.

If the name Bernie Goetz sounds familiar to you, then yes, he is the man who was acquitted for shooting four black teenagers on the subway in 1984 when they attempted to mug him.

Attached: P1060720.jpg (1600x1200, 241K)

Ah the old philosophical question.

If you see a fly caught in a spider's web, do you help it or not?

Some argue that our urge to help those who are weak is what makes us human.

>but squirrels are dirty little assholes and exceedingly common.
just like humans

Faggot

Objectively speaking, finishing off a mortally hurt animal is far kinder than drawing out its agony for several hurt just so you can virtue signal on social media. Very few vets would actually treat a wild animal brought in off the street. They'd euthanize it and bill whoever brought it in.

Based nigger killer

Attached: 1554953254187.jpg (1000x967, 155K)

>But you're celebrating a crow being at risk of starving now
I'm not, actually. Why do you have to lie to make up for your lack of humanity, schizo user?

Nice man.

>he becomes the main villain during the finale
Based

>Objectively speaking
>is far kinder
So many dumb fucks ITT.

Crows don't eat squirrels...

Do they?

>animal control
As a kid I had the foresight to wrap the dying squirrel in a blanket while I called the nearest vet. The squirrel had to become a pet because that thing was 100% not surviving outside again, but it lived. A kid. 9 years old and I didn't freak on social media.

Most people aren't empathetic towards anything, making them exactly what they eat - which is a cruel argument on its own considering animals have an intelligent that humans can't comprehend

I can smell the boomer in this post.

ty

Almost 30. *sip* Mad, zoomie?

he should swap souls with the squirrel to atone for the murder of his wife.

Crows are scavengers. The squirrel would've already been dying before the bird got anywhere near it.

Also, by intervening in the circle of life, you're playing God.

Literally the Virgin and the Chad

This has to be the stupidest shit I've ever read on here.

whomst’d’ve doth thou quote?

>t. no American legal experience once so ever

Fuck this thread is a god damn gold mine for retarded shit.

>If you see a fly caught in a spider's web, do you help it or not?
I ran into this exact situation last summer at my grandparent's house. A wasp was caught in a spider web and buzzing like crazy. I considered intervening, but before I could make up my mind the spider had come out and killed the wasp.

I hesitated because spiders are super important for the balance of nature, right? They keep the insect population in check iirc, without them the world would drown in swarms of flies.

I often think about this moment though. Wondering if I did the right thing...

Attached: 1551291442725.jpg (192x224, 18K)

>denying wildlife their meal
what a jerk

>free wasp
>it stings you in the eyeballs

Everything... perfectly balanced...

>>I often think about this moment though. Wondering if I did the right thing...
Absolutely pathetic, dude.

Any insects that enter my domicile have violated the NAP and will be put down WITH prejudice for threatening me and my family with minor annoyance.

This is like worrying that if you walk in your fucking garden you might crush an ant underfoot.

>not wanting a wasp bro to follow you around and attack your enemies

I stepped on a frog walking across my yard last summer

Felt absolutely horrible, didn't see him down there at all

Attached: fe6.jpg (655x509, 82K)

Okay Mr Tough Guy

Flies are annoying faggots, it's not even a dilemma for me letting the fly die so the spiderbro and I can coexist together peacefully

got em

I so wish the Germans HERE were even a fraction based like him.

Fag

>not wanting a wasp sis

Attached: wasp-up.png (1336x803, 534K)

Wasp are literally the NIGGERS of the Bee/Wasp etc. family of insects.
If it were a Bee I wouldn´t have hesitated freeing it.

sounds like he's cleaned up his act since then

Faggot

when the HRT hits

Attached: literally_less_evolved.png (1319x171, 41K)

Spics are already the most common creature.

lmao

why didn't he show this much empathy to his dying wife

>pets
>further civilization
k then

Because, as the old saying goes. How do you know if someones a vegan? Dont worry, theyll tell you

WoW!! Reposting this on my feed. :)

>my feed
make sure there's no meat

These retarded fags who live in the cities dont understand shit. If you put a bird feeder out its fucking annoying whenever the coons, squirrels, and other vermin get it. And even worse when its surrounded by cats waiting for their next meal.

someone photoshop a needle next to it and tweet RIP SQUIRREL DEAD OF NATURAL CAUSES

*womanslaughter

xD

>Patton Oswalt PROLONGED THE SUFFERING OF A DYING RODENT in some ill-conceived attempt to seem empathetic

Attached: 1554847020482.png (800x1068, 397K)

edgy

I'd be lonely if I killed my wife and was a literal nobody to anyone actually famous

I'm in socal. Fullerton area. Hour off from beaches and I still see the little nut goblins. So ur point is?

>user is intelligent, nihilistic and with a wicked sense of humor

Attached: 1477718039426.jpg (740x721, 45K)

>he can get away with murder because hes famous and you cant prove it also she was fat or whatever haha
fuck off she deserves justice

>Bernie Goetz
And then one of the niggers that tried to rob him sued his ass and won 45mil from Goetz, putting him into bankruptcy and ruining him. The kicker, the guys waited 10 years later to sue him whenever blacks were seen as oppressed victims again and got a non-white jury to screw Bernie.

based

>my feed
Formerly Chuck's

>assmad vegan

>doctors are bad people
Die on that hill, /pol/.

Attached: 1555726952785.png (480x475, 266K)

Whatever helps you sleep at night, sugar plum

>he killed her, source: memes
Are you dabbin on Pattin Oswalt

Based PoCs.

Nice

Attached: 1549514325034.gif (500x233, 972K)

HELP HELP THE SECRETARY HAS FALLEN

Tip that fedora user

>cleaned up his act
Implying he did anything wrong

>oh yeah my wife ODed right next to me oh well haha
fuck that, its THE way to get away with murder, ill never believe an OD of someone who wasn't an obvious meth head

Top-tier bait

Wrong, that’s a grey squirrel and you definitely have those

Attached: 836857F5-15E9-482D-9142-2875BD90CE0C.jpg (2560x2122, 1006K)

>he killed her, source: i don't know that much about medicine lol
yeet bro

probably the toxic fumes from all the rotting shit in the streets

>Oswalt
>doctor
gr8 doctor bro. he even nursed his wife the grave

It has to be. Christ, visit your local junkyard and there's probably a colony of rabbits just chilling there.

Epic meme, bro. Lock her up, am I right?

Based crowposter

what part are you struggling with? the fact that people kill each other or the fact that people OD?

>kill own wife
>save random squirrel

Who killed:

Judy Garland
Peaches Geldof
Heath Ledger
Philipp Seymour Hoffman
Marilyn Monroe
Prince
Brian Adams
Anna Nicole Smith
Brittany Murphy
River Phoenix

?

>On a scientific level, no we aren't.
You should go back

>doesn't make an argument
>heh, so many retards in here who are inferior to my vast intellect
Holy shit, go back to whatever subreddit you came from with the rest of your circlejerking friends.
It must drive you crazy how you can't just downvote everyone you disagree with and hide their posts from the world, huh?

The fact how a woman on xanax and fentanyl, which have killed plenty people before, obviously must have been murdered by her husband.

a succession of jew producers / studio owners
apart from heath that one was legit suicide

>takes the first letter of their first name to discover the serial killer

you phrased it in a funny way but yeah, that's basically true. I actually leave spiders alone unless they ever walk in my field of vision.

Patton Oswalt. He's a serial killer. Duh!

Attached: 1546542879338.png (209x241, 8K)

He should have let the crow put it out of its misery.

He denied this poor creature a swift death.

Measure kindness in objective levels. Now tell me how you can be "far kinder", objectively speaking. You see what the problem is, buddy? Do I have to spell out the absurdity of your so called redpilled philosophy?

Whom hath said thus

>Asked in 2004 whether he was making payments on the judgment, Goetz responded "I don't think I've paid a penny on that", and referred any questions on the subject to his attorney.

I wasn't the one who made the argument, dipshit. I was only pointing out how you couldn't even type a coherent thought, and instead acted like a holier than thou sophmore philosophy major. So again, go back to redd it and stay there, "buddy."

>I wasn't the one who made the argument, dipshit
Then I don't give a shit what you think, lmao.

I dont believe Patton Oswalt murdered his wife bu I doubt that he was unaware of her drug abuse, he just didnt give a fuck. While she tried catching some killer (aka sitting around in her house reading about him on wikipedia and using Oswalts connections to get access to police files) he was busy eating and being unfunny. He probably introduced her to fentanyl. Honestly fuck both of them, I have no respect for Oswalt and hes disgusting to look at. When his fat ass dies of a heart attack ill laugh.

You either step on it's head or turn around and forget it. Crows are also one of my favorite animals so I'd probably watch the show.

No. Those are Mexicans.

Faggot tweets this to his followers instead of actual help? " Look at me. I'm so considerate. LOOK AT ME!" Fuck this self absorbed retard.

Based user leading a one man genocide against the squirrel scourge

Attached: 1518718444644.jpg (151x150, 5K)

And? he still had to declare bankruptcy to deal with the ordeal you dumbass

and now the crow is going to die too
all because of patton oswald, nature hater

I liked it when Travolta got a lot of supplies and piloted his own plane to Haiti after that massive earthquake

>The problem is doing something as worthless as saving an already dying squirrel or tossing starfish into the ocean, and thinking you've accomplished something "good."
And the same people who "save the animals" also happily support abortion. I don't like animal suffering but it seems to me if I'm going to save something I should focus on human lives first.

>retarded manlet interfering with nature
Wife mudering manchild

>What is circumcision
Yes. Yes they are.

absolutely based
i live in a libtard semi urban city and the fucks banned shooting anywhere in the city, actually i think they banned most guns or other shit

bunch of spineless fucks
and yet i go 15 miles north i can shoot w/e i want lmao
surely this will keep the criminals out, amirite?

Well that's because in America they don't typically have an Arab attached to their anus.

underrated

Attached: 1435611189871.gif (340x332, 2.87M)

not alive