Alone again sir, what will it be, Alita?

>Sir, your girlfriend is only 16 and suffers from Aspergers, this is highly inappropriate.

Attached: behindcounter.jpg (468x526, 45K)

Do americans really do this?

>His cinema doesn't have shooter tower

How does it feel living in a 4th world country

AHEM

FUCK BONBI

Attached: download.jpg (155x155, 6K)

>tfw relegated to backup shooter
I missed being near the penis inspection zone, now I have to make the trek across the theatre each time

Well how about this is none of your fucking business. Just give me the tickets

As someone with a girlfriend who's probably younger than she should be, it's difficult to get a girl to wean.

I dont see any sniper rifles.

>not '360 no-scoping' the patrons.
Jesus, what a fucking n00b.

Imagine being so poor you couldn't afford a 50k seat kinoplex

>tfw got called for re-evaluation and prostate confirmation four times during my last moviegoing experience
And the guy kept telling me how soft my hair looked. Maybe if he was looking down and not up he'd have done his job properly the first time.
Aquaman wasn't even that good.

Based.

Doesnt Bonbi only like East Asian boys like BTS?

Attached: bts is bigger beatles_cnn_3.jpg (937x672, 234K)

redpill me about the popcorn mines.

I'm afraid you'll have to come with me, sir. A 16 year old girl is never in her prime. The punishment for having relations with a woman not in her prime is... the popcorn mines.

Attached: 1553007647447.jpg (1024x690, 354K)

Attached: 1537040717770.webm (454x692, 577K)

>ywn hold her upright while she awkwardly but enthusiastically rides you
>ywn listen her slightly too loud, uneven moans as you plow her
>ywn watch her face crinkle at the taste of your cum that she always swallows anyway
>ywn have an autistic gf

Aspie girls are very sexual, but you need to be careful.

>even socially inept and autistic women are still desired

Truly the oppressed sex amirite?

cause, nico nico nii...

most of her celeb crushes are asian boys

Boy, fetch a white man to serve me. And I don't want to here anymore sass from you, got it?

The weaker sex can make weakness cute for a reason, user. Man up and compete, take a dick up your ass or die a lone, impotent incel, there are your options.

Well if a girl is physically desirable she'll be desired no matter what; it's the personality that might make her more of a pariah. I've always suspected my gf might be somewhere on the spectrum, but as long as she's in a good mood, she's extremely loving and her inanities are endearing. It's more the immaturity that's tiring to deal with (and I'm not talking regular woman immaturity).

Hey Robert how come I never see you with a girlfriend?

it's a cosplay of an anime girl whose signature move is doing this with her hands

Attached: nico.jpg (500x482, 180K)

Could you guys please explain the anvil thing

Quads and I get a perfect girlfriend.

oh, user
here, you take it easy, I'll tie the noose for you

Jesus Christ, user

Attached: 1552919875691.jpg (800x662, 85K)

Close but no cigar. Nor gf.

it was not your destiny

Same like that Hit or Miss girl. I looked her up and all she posts is kpop femboys on her social media.

Attached: 1541190256785.webm (640x360, 1.42M)

she's underage you sick fuck

close, I guess

Sir, why would I bring my girlfriend to my job. But I you want, you're free to join us on the Alita screening after my shift.

Attached: 1553137523975[1].jpg (509x339, 142K)

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Stop projecting your autism on cute girls you fucking retard. Lol

>girl
>her
>she
>her

Based af

kek

>showers at the theater are just a mem-
Eeeeeeghad!!

Attached: IMG_2332.jpg (566x941, 94K)

Robert, I'm going to level with you.
I'm lonely.
I've been lonely for a long time.
That's why I kept sneaking in during no-singles nights.
And you always looked the other way.
I appreciate that, you were a good friend.
But as much as I love you as a friend, there are some holes no amount of crab legs can fill.
That's why I had to finally admit defeat and ask out a girl with autism.
She may not be all there but she likes me for me and for the first time in my life I like me for me too.
Robert, my friend, my bro, my sole defender: I beg you.
Please let me be happy.
We can still hang out, I'll still shoot finger guns at you when I see you at the candy bar.
I'll still tip you for pouring chocolate sauce on my popcorn.
But I'm a worn man, I am tired of my solitude.
Please don't tell on me.

Attached: 1536988786798.jpg (362x362, 21K)

Theme:
youtube.com/watch?v=7iqxzURgQWg&list=RD7iqxzURgQWg&start_radio=1

Attached: 1555639006708.png (210x240, 65K)

This is well-written, but
>That's why I had to finally admit defeat and ask out a girl with autism.
You're pretty fucking normie if you think asking out a girl with autism is "settling."

>off by one
Congrants user you get a perfect gf (male)

Lads I'm 22 and I started dating this 17yo chick but nobody notices it. It's bretty gud

can confirm this. I have the libido of a corpse so this sometimes causes problems. And not a sexy corpse like a vampire.

What kinda things is she immature about?

>just messing user, have fun in there
>here's an extra order of crab legs on the house because you're my fav
t-thanks roberto

Oof

H... how do you know her age Robert?

Oh, sir, dont forget to go through penis inspection. And looks like your "girlfriend" needs one too. All due respect, young lady.

GOD FUCKING DAMN IT ROBERT

>She may not be all there but she likes me for me and for the first time in my life I like me for me too.
This is where the feels came in.

Attached: 1552961040955.png (1440x999, 1.17M)

do yurofags have no way of defending their theater?

>And not a sexy corpse like a vampire.

kek

>you will never be the designated shooter at the kinoplex
Why live bros?

Attached: crying-while-laughing-emoji-57d7b78e7bca3.jpg (540x960, 36K)

Yea Forums lore threads are my favorite

I chuckled

Attached: 1555275367554.jpg (228x221, 17K)

This.
I had an autistic gf and she basically thought of me as her "Ken doll" where she tried to appose my body like a doll.
I would sit down after work and she'd walk over, move me to a different part of the couch, reposition my legs, put my arms on my knees, tilt my head up and then start licking my face.
At first it was kinky but eventually it just felt dehumanizing.
Sometimes when I stood up she'd start screaming and stomping her feet because she thought I hated her.
During sex she'd do thing like push my leg up as far as it could stretch until it hurt and pat my cheeks when she was ready to cum.
Autists are a fucking handful.

Fuck

Attached: 1554180589958.jpg (400x389, 112K)

>one for Shazam please...
You weren't that guy, were you Yea Forums?

Attached: afJjeLU_d.jpg (360x360, 10K)

What the heck i want to be the work as the designated shooter in a theater now.
I'm very jealous of the ameri-big(guy)s now.

She's actually 22. Rare hormone disorder and all.

Attached: a07.png (434x750, 195K)

Do white girls like this actually like Asian dudes or nah

>HE WAS THIS CLOSE YUUG

Attached: 3b73c16b8019b735e275fe6157336f60.jpg (497x381, 101K)

You be the judge.

Attached: N-1-e1527074121802.jpg (800x800, 91K)

Thank god mine only has sperg and not weapons grade tism. That sounds fucking awful.

>tfw want to go to the movies but it’s the school holidays and the kids will laugh at me for being alone

Superior asian cock wins again

Catwalks, dummy

Oh user.....

Attached: 1543909028823.jpg (600x600, 64K)

Good lord that tummy

Based robert always looking out for us

Out of all the Asian males, why do they pick the uggos? Genuine question. If I was a male equivalent as hot as her I wouldn't touch any uggos with a ten foot pole. Pic kind of related I guess, same deal just backwards.

Attached: 1555642605933-tv.jpg (2048x1463, 372K)

Attached: 45287EEF-F777-47CF-99BE-175FAA5A2321.jpg (286x176, 9K)

Attached: 1546254260791.png (1280x528, 523K)

you actually dont

TUMBLING DOWN
TUMBLING DOWN
TUMBLING DOWN

women are the niggers of gender

Im so sorry

Attached: 1542150709058.jpg (218x230, 29K)

whomst

Attached: 1536249491098.gif (500x278, 636K)

Attached: sam gun control.png (1164x1070, 1.05M)

I just want an unrelated human female with a self lubricating hole that doesn't stink with a BMI of 28 or below to kisps, fuck, and cuddle with in my free time. No strings attached.

Attached: 1537197208800.jpg (500x561, 74K)

there you go

I KNOW
I KNOW I'VE LET YOU DOWN

>CUT MY LIFE INTO PIECES

Attached: 1531919474600.jpg (400x400, 28K)

>doesnt like the stank
bring out your humanity, get primal and youll love the stank

A healthy vagina is supposed to have a smell, yes, but not a damn putrid stench.

yes, I remember when I was a virgin

Attached: 1499207602390.jpg (1600x1063, 251K)

But it's perfectly legal in my country. I expected more cultural sensitivity from you, Robert

Attached: 1546064467825.jpg (540x720, 33K)

I fucking hate the pussy stench, but not as much as I hate the pussy taste. Being straight is a suffering.

this is only a problem with white girls from my experience.
Black girl pussy is way nicer for some reason.

You must be an actual virgin desperate for sex if you aren't immediately repulsed by the stench I'm talking about. Major indicator she's got some hardcore bugs and overall poor hygiene.

They also look gross. Now that I think about it, I've never seen a vagina in real life and I'm not even a virgin

Attached: attempt to contact home planet.jpg (449x586, 30K)

sorry user we are not meant to be happy

Stop lying user, you know you love it

Attached: German_women.webm (1280x720, 2.28M)

Imagine not cleaning the smegma off of your genitalia in an attempt to be more attractive to the opposite sex. Downright disgusting.

no, d-delete this

BASED Robert

grimes has the uncanny ability of looking cute and utterly repulsive

Attached: 1506265464437.jpg (630x420, 45K)

She's Swiss to be specific

>and for the first time in my life I like me for me too.
aaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Attached: 164583478621.jpg (600x600, 52K)

My wife has a touch of tism

It's cute

i would love to

Sorry user

Attached: missed_dubs_by_one.gif (400x170, 1019K)

Dude

Attached: 29e.jpg (600x885, 36K)

Marriage is like a shot in the dark

Attached: mads.jpg (594x395, 54K)

Oof

Attached: pasta.jpg (485x484, 30K)

Thank God mine's worst offense is wanting to do everything, but getting anxious over every single fucking thing afterwards
i.e. I fucked her raw because she asked and after that she was in a complete breakdown for like 25 days about being pregnant (she wasn't). That happens every month. Also she reads autistically too much into things, like me valuing movies and friends above her

Love your pic and the background detail

I CANT DROWN MY DEMONS

I think that’s the little girl who was being groomed by the man who was running a discord devoted to her.
Honestly, where are the damned parents?

I aborted drunk sex with a girl right before it happened because I could smell her pussy too strongly. I felt bad for her, but I couldn't do it

>tfw a post on Yea Forums is more profound than most movies ever produced
Truly the best board on the 4channel

Attached: 234234234.jpg (1600x960, 405K)

White girls date minorities cause they are told to or because of misdirected maternal instinct. No actual attraction just heavy duty virtue signalling

>t. Single virgin

Attached: 13959876276815818742363.jpg (385x385, 20K)

Have we achieved peak kino with this post?

Oof, the stench is partially due to the secretion of mucus in order to facilitate sex so she probably really liked you and was really stirred up.

based

Attached: 1553662472635.jpg (820x906, 77K)

Just because someone wants you that doesn't mean you should want them

Attached: 1552264712186.png (1660x870, 177K)

But Robert, we're in west virginia. Don't you know that the legal age of consent in west virginia is 16? come on now man, you're better than this.

>posted this during my lol randumb phase on some girls MySpace page in middle school
Still keeps me up at night

Was she a dolphin?

Quads and everyone in this thread gets a fucking qt gf!!! KEK GIVE ME YOUR POWERS!!!!

Im doing this for you guys.

>Quads and my crush becomes my girlfriend.
>Quads and I get a perfect girlfriend.
You tried. Which is more than can said for most of us.

Sounds perfect to me

I've... seen digits you people wouldn't believe. One million get off the shoulder of Yea Forums. I watched dubs threads glitter in the dark near the first page of Yea Forums. All those numbers will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time... to die (a virgin).

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAa

Attached: 1550165262995.jpg (509x625, 31K)

IF I COULD START AGAIN

thank you for admitting that you're a FUCKING FAGGOT

>Handsome as fuck
>Rich
>Famous
>Settles for THIS
Why Nikolaj?

You don't marry the woman you want to fuck.

Mine too

thank you for admitting that you're a DESPERATE VIRGIN

AND YOU CAN HAVE IT ALL MY EMPIRE OF DIRT

depression kino

Hey, I’m lifting in in effort to improve my physical appearance.
Now all I have to do is shed 50 pounds of fat, start showering again, learn to drive, go back to school, get a job, and muster the courage to talk to girls.

I AM DROWNING

THERE IS NO SIGN OF LAND

Dubs

Sperg roasties gettin' toastie.

only one word. KINO

>16 year old girl is never in her prime
You've lost your goddamn mind, Robert, you're babbling like a post wall hippie.

>user, that's not your girlfriend anymore, look next to you

Attached: 1551580035749.gif (1024x691, 545K)

Sorry, your life is not a comedy
it's a tragedy

Attached: upsetbert.jpg (1024x718, 628K)

Don't worry, once she cheats on you and stomps your heart in half, your former depression will feel like a fond memory in comparison to the sharp yet lingering pain you will experience.

They're probably athlete chads, which the asian form is not meant to contain, so they become deformed.
Otherwise, women won't touch ricels.

Yo, this bitch got a stinky snatch!

>had girlfriend that liked to deepthroat and swallow and didn't like being eaten out
It was pretty nice, but then she got hooked on coke and started fucking a dealer. Women, can't live with em, they also suck.

i'll see you in the afterlife
youtube.com/watch?v=TxLtyK0Dtkk

...

Attached: cringe.png (385x243, 134K)

I bet some fucking Sneed guy stole the quads and your gf

Attached: 5DB33FBD-D2EC-445B-9CFD-B74BDBF3CEC4.jpg (1022x688, 176K)

THE RIDE NEVER ENDS

Attached: 1544396956314.gif (326x326, 255K)

>want to go watch a movie
>don‘t want to go alone because of no singles policy and because its cringe to go alone
>ask my qt sister to come with me
>she agrees
>walk into cinema while holding hands
>all the people treat me with respect because they think she is my gf
>coworker saw us and tells this the next day at the job
>everyone hears the rumors that I have a hot gf
>female coworkers suddenly show interest in me
>people start treatig me like a chad

Attached: AD28E927-456F-4FB2-8760-F527AF338214.png (701x668, 78K)

Tfw hot gf but ugly sister
You have it the best fren, you had sex afterwards right?

This is bullshit. I had a hot gf for like 5 years and people still treated me like the beta faggot I am.

Attached: 1551922039982.jpg (1020x759, 148K)

no

Attached: 1528552717377.jpg (694x679, 87K)

HOLY FUCK SAUCE NOW

Attached: 1501621420717.jpg (598x714, 303K)

Thats because people saw that your hot gf didn‘t behave around you like she truly loves you.
My qt sister loves me and always cuddles with me and kisses me all the time, people saw that she loves me and that made them treat me better because if a man like me can get a girl like her to love me that means I am worth a lot or have a giant cock and I have a big cock.

Dude I should do this with my sister. Haha wouldn't it be so weird to hold hands with her and cuddle while watching a movie in a dark theater right lol.

>My qt sister loves me and always cuddles with me and kisses me all the time
Is this normal for american siblings?

Whats so weird about this?
We do this all the time now, we go to the movies and cuddle in one of these seats made for couples.
Its comfy but of course not as comfy as watching at home cuddling in a bed.

Kinoplex is not in fucking West Virginia, idiot

I‘m not american and yes this is normal sibling behavior.
Its the purest form of Love.

looks like you'll be sticking around a little longer

Attached: 1541583350628.jpg (800x1106, 136K)

Didn't Nico have autism though?

WHAT HAVE I BECOME

>he doesn't know

She's just generally quite childish about little things and gets irritable quite easily unless everything is absolutely perfect in a moment. She also has this slightly "deified" (for a lack of a better term) outlook on my capabilities, and gets genuinely confused and upset if I tell her I simply can't do something she wants me to do (like if she wants me to cook something for her that I have no idea how to cook, for instance), and her justification for that will basically boil down to "but it's you, why can't you do it?"

It sounds endearing, and it is, but it gets annoying. She also generally loses and gains warmth whenever her mood suits her, so if I catch her in a weird mood, it'll be like talking to an acquaintance, rather than someone I have sex with. This is especially taxing on me when only an hour ago, she's being incredibly affectionate in an almost daughter like way (there's a somewhat pronounced age-gap between us and she takes full advantage of this).

Overall, though, her pros definitely outweigh her cons. I'd recommend potential autist gf if you can find one.

DARKNESS IMPRISONING ME

ALMOST HEAVEN

The movie theater in my trash heap hometown closed. Last movie I saw was Alita.

Shes being groomed by a 50 year old chess master. They're probably already fucking

I'M IN MY PRIME!

Attached: 1512430540868.jpg (1200x1200, 275K)

The movie's called Wetlands

Attached: DF4F113D-91DD-40CC-B1B5-922E6FBE1480.jpg (270x604, 56K)

don't do it user the movie only gets worse from there

There's no such thing anyway

>He doesn't use ACOG on his sniper rifle

Attached: 6087E000-B837-49AE-93D4-B4179A0E8820.jpg (971x786, 106K)

>I'll have the Aurora special, extra bright orange hair dye please

So close

Attached: 1551622878983.jpg (850x822, 173K)

>D'OH

Thanks
will watch just for this scene

That's his neg, user. Putting his girl in place and keeping her in check with the only thing he has against her.

based, thanks robert

user...

Attached: 1554485029030.jpg (1920x1080, 944K)

user, i...

user...

Attached: maxresdefault (1).jpg (1280x720, 72K)

Attached: fc4.jpg (540x720, 53K)

I’m married. Love is better than sex.

Update me on the lore.
I'm not familiar with the shooters now.