>the only hobbit to settle down, get married and have kids
Based
>the only hobbit to settle down, get married and have kids
Based
>basically saves the world
>marries the local bar slut
Oh sam...
He is pure.
He's the only guy in the Shire with a dick big enough to tame the town tart.
Better than being a gay little faggot hobbit that goes riding boats with hsi creepy old boyfriend
Heh, you tell 'em, my fellow kekistani militiaman. Women are such whores. Now excuse me while I whip out my 2 incher and load up my blacked.com account. Toodles!
Rosie is no slut
>the only hobbit to settle down, get married and have kids
But that's not true. Both Merry and Pippin had kids as well. Pippin's son married Sam's daughter for fuck's sake.
I don’t think you understand how memes or Yea Forums work
Whatever floats your boat weirdo
t. Jody
God I wish that were me.
>She married Master Meriadoc Brandybuck of Buckland, and had at least one son.
>had at least one son.
>at least
>one
>son
Somehow I'm not surprised.
A daughter is still a daughter.
You're a logical guy
Herpes haver
Even if I were to concede that she's a slut, there's nothing more BASED and hobbitpilled than taking the village slut and turning her into a loyal baby making machine.
>taking the gaffer's sloppy seconds
>Everytime Merry's wife gives birth he takes the child from the midwife.
>If it is a son, he accepts the child as hell as own blood and gives it back to the midwife
>if it is a daughter, Merry strikes his beloved three times before taking the child to an abandoned Hobbit hole near the Old Forest in Auckland
>She used to weep, but now she accepts it
>Pippin used to join him on these rides, but now he spends all his time south in Gondor
>He arrives, and is greater by a Uruk in a dress, followed by a fat one smoking Longbottom leaf
>'Master Brandybuck,' they say, 'what brings you to our dwelling tonight?'
>King Aragorn had hunted down all of the surviving Orcs and Uruks, these were the only that remained. The living reminder of the horror Merry once endured. He smiles.
>Looks like Meat's back on the Menu, Boys!
Yes I love my wife to have flashes of the hundreds of dicks she took as I'm plowing her to have a baby
>be hobbit
>spend long day tending to your cabbages
>nip on down to the green dragon for a few pints in the evening to unwind
>neighbor invites you to his daughters 15th birthday party
>Pippin overhears and starts his shit
>again
>can't say shit because he was a fellowship dick rider
>such is life in bywater
Only an insecure gamma male would say that.
The true alpha will make her feel warm and secure. Her mind will never drift back to her previous men, if they actually exist.
>true alpha
>gets everyones sloppy seconds
you're a huge beta, yikes.
You could make the case that the story was more about Sam than Frodo.
Past a certain age a Hobbit without a family can be a problem.