>It's a "Vader starts ranting about space magic while you're trying to work" episode
It's a "Vader starts ranting about space magic while you're trying to work" episode
Kevin Reyes
Juan Mitchell
This guy was a fag.
Blake Ortiz
He's literally seen Vader kill people with it though
Joseph Myers
why would you even backtalk Vader?
Andrew Thomas
>destroying planets is nothing compared to being able to choke people from a few metres away
was it autism
Nolan Hall
in the EU powerful Force Users like Sheev could literally summon Force Storms that could fuck up entire fleets so he's not totally autistic.
Jace Ross
He wasn't just talking about the ability to choke dudes
but yes it was autism
Eli Evans
t. eu autist
t. autist
also checked
Evan Robinson
>doesnt do it at any point in the source material
is it autism
Christian Ortiz
>doesnt do it at any point in the source material
I wish he did though
Jordan Williams
destroying planets is nothing compared to sith alchemy you ignorant normalfag.
Adrian Morgan
The force in the OT is pretty clearly some kind of compelling destiny sort of power
The force is implied to be tied to fate itself, so I would say that the hand of god is stronger than anything they can make, and since the force put Luke in the right place at the right time and gave him the ability to blow up the superweapon Vader was 100% right
Lincoln Roberts
>in the EU powerful Force Users like Sheev
Palpatine doesn't have a first name in the EU, he renounced it to spite his father Cosinga. Sheev is mouse droppings.
Matthew Sanchez
Imagine the smell
Liam Cooper
because in episode 4, vader was nothing special but a dog for the emperor. a special counsel. motti was a high ranking official. notice grand moff tarkin (think like a governor level) commands vader around like nothing.
what power does a gun have compared to the hand of the person who wields it?
who cares
no that was george lucas
palpatine doesn't even exist in episode 4
Christopher Cooper
>Hey wait a minute, don't I know you from somewhere?
>*snap*
>ANAKIN FUCKIN' SKYWALKER
>Yeah it is you!
>Little fuckin' Ani!
>I remember watching you win the Boonta Eve Podracing Classic back on Tatooine with my old man back in 32 BBY
>Man you were so goddamn fast
>I was your biggest fan, man
>Who would have thought that a little human slave boy could beat Sebulba?
>He always won
>See, I always thought it was your Plug 6 thrust coil that gave you the edge, but my dad says that it was your Stack IV coolant pump that kept you in the race, what do you think?
>Oh man, he's never gonna believe this
>Tarkan, get a picture real quick
>This is so fucking awesome, nobody is gonna believe I met Ani Skywalker
>Hey man, why did you quit podracing?
>Dude, you should come out of retirement, you were the best
Asher Gonzalez
We shall double our digits!
Connor Adams
>be me
>trying to grow my career in the military, hopefully I’ll be out in several years with some marketable skills
>there’s this weird cripple magician who my commanding officer keeps around, i don’t fucking know why. Kind of resent him because he got a cushy job at birth
>try to bring the bantz with him in a male camaraderie kind of way
>motherfucker starts choking me
>I’m a fucking low level officer this shit is above my pay grade to have to tolerate this
>a few days later my base gets blown up by some jungle spooks
Liam Moore
>palpatine doesn't even exist in episode 4
Wrong. Tarkin informs the board of officers that the Emperor has just dissolved the senate at the beginning of the scene Vader Force chokes Motti. And he's named as Palpatine in the book that came out a year before the movie even did.
Carson Ross
If I was a Jedi I'd be depressed knowing that all my actions are just the will of the force
I'd probably use the will of my force of some twi'lek Jedi
Zachary Howard
I mean, if you were a high-ranking officer in a strict authoritarian regime and some spook in a crazy costume and mask implied to have magical powers with no stated rank was just pacing around your meeting with even higher-ranked officers, fucking with him would probably be a bad idea. Even if his powers aren't real, someone higher on the totem pole than you thinks they are.
Carter Murphy
quadruple autism
Aaron Cox
>what power does a gun have compared to the hand of the person who wields it?
i challenge you to a duel. you have a choice between your fist and a pistol.
Ian Jones
>Hey Smitty, you hear about what Vader did in the war council? He choked some staff officer half to death with some kind of mindpower from like 6 feet away and the poor guy shit his pants in the process. Had to sanitize the entire room.
Ayden Sanchez
Asher Hernandez
great. palpatine doesn't exist in episode 4.
sigh
Samuel Campbell
The point is that the force is some kind of analog of destiny
In this case if it's a duel of man with pistol versus unarmed man favored by the force, the force will arrange the universe so that the pistol shot misses and an anvil falls on his head
Dylan Anderson
I get why the Stormtroopers accompany Vader, they probably respect how he slaps the officers around.
Gavin Perez
Impressive get and post
Jackson Turner
You only know the force wins because you've seen the end of the movie.
Caleb Hill
Lincoln Kelly
Vader after a co-worker tells him to stop interjecting bible verses into memos
Nolan Anderson
Kreia when?
Jack Wood
Nah, in the original Star Wars, Ben says the force "surrounds, binds, and flows" through everything, and the Jedi can feel and direct it to help him meet a goal. So the Jedi should be able to use the force to feel the intention of the shooter and either move to avoid the shot, or intercept the arm in some manner, as Ben did in Tatooine in the Cantina when he hacked off dudes arm.
Jace Reed
comfy and wholesome post
Justin Robinson
>no vader bullying posts
disturbing
Parker Ross
Floor polish compound, hot metal, and whiffs of burnt benzene.
Kayden Watson
Joshua Edwards
I think the Emperor, his shuttles,and guards smell like grandma's candy dish and felt.
Asher Murphy
Nice one
Kevin Collins
Were the officers that retarded that they had no idea that fucking with Jason Vorhees: Space Magic Edition was a bad idea? I realize the Jedi and Sith at the time were more or less boogeymen, but still.
Bentley Allen
vader would've abandoned the dark side if people were actually nice to him like that
Henry Morales
Wholesome post with quads of 4?? What space wizardry is this??
Owen Ortiz
>Jason Vorhees: Space Magic Edition
Caleb Thompson
>employee of the galaxies biggest trade organization
>all our transport fleets are parked outside this royal planet
>the hangars are filled with the tanks and war robots we usually sell
>are we having customers?
>suddenly this red republic ship parks in the 2nd hangarbay
>know the viceroy has some autistic disliking for the republic
>these two hooded hobos exit the ship
>30 mins go by and out of nowhere our roof canon fucking blows up the ship
>maintinence crew look around in confusion and ask themselfes if it was a malfuction
>we start hearing blastershots from the conferance room
>wtf
>the viceroy is talking to some hooded old man on a hologram
>he says its time to fucking invade the planet were parked next to
>start panicing since I only have a buisness master and dont know shit about warfare
Nolan Brown
>Man I swear you always get the best jobs. You got to go on adventures with lord Vader while Conrad and I were cleaning the remains of engineers out of the death laser because the emperor insisted we test fire it during maintenance. And it was another planet of black people again, I swear he fires it up whenever we find one. And he keeps going on about "the day of the laser" and "sticking it to that nigger Windu". It's getting concerning.
Lucas Williams
Based prequelpost
Thomas Peterson
Ryder Morris
>Get the fuck out of here...Lt. Adams was telling me at chow that he saw him pick a man up with one hand like a rag doll and strangled him until the guy shit himself, and then he crushed his throat and tossed him to the deck like a piece of trash.
Brandon Rodriguez
That would be comedy.
Jacob Rodriguez
>sticking it to that nigger Windu". It's getting concerning.
Jeremiah Sanchez
>Space niggers, though, whaddya' gonna do?
Chase Martinez
Hello seth
Tyler Kelly
He literally just proved he did retard. "La la im not listening" nonsense doesnt change this. Keep up
Austin Parker
Vader is though. He's like a commissar, there to oversee certain things and represent the Emperor's interests. Palpatine doesn't just have to control worlds, he has to retain control of the military. You think that aggressive little shit armed with what he thinks is the ultimate power in the galaxy wouldn't consider a coup? What keeps them in line is Vader who could kill everyone in that room with minimal fuss
Jose Long
vader was about winning hearts and minds.
Carter Butler
>space magic edition
Brandon Ortiz
>blow up planet
>force users just become ghosts and haunt you forever
Jordan Parker
That sounds like bullshit. You've hit your head on the door too many times.
Austin Barnes
Nigger
Connor Ross
Vader smells like baby powder and the scent your CPU gives off when it's getting too hot, you know the one.
Joseph Garcia
>force users just become ghosts and haunt you forever
Sheev...Sheev, wake up. Have you ever heard of sliders?
Sliders were one of the specialties available at Dex's Diner. Like the rest of the food served there, they were greasy and unhealthy, but also cheap and filling. Sliders were small and square. Most were served with Mongo Beefhead patties on trans-shipped medium-density food-boards, although some replaced the patty with another base like firaxan shark fillet, which was used in the Manaan slider. When Dexter Jettster ran the diner, he rejected elaborated preparations, and merely grilled the food-board and perforated it with five holes. Sliders were popular among the diner's customers, and regulars would even travel light-years back to Coruscant to satisfy their cravings for them. To avoid gastrointestinal distress, patrons would often furtively take a mild antidote before eating the tasty food. Sliders were garnished with Dexter's so-called special sauce, to which some visitors accused him of adding small quantities of addictive drugs. He was a good friend.
Alexander Reed
Unironically the deepest lore
Brody Butler
EU tried to justify it by having guys like Darth Nihilus that can kill entire planets worth of people using just the force
Juan Hughes
Of what?
Aaron Phillips
>hey glad to hear it man, always nice to meet a fan
>yeah I was like this close to losing
Jack Taylor
>Hey Ani! All dressed up. All grown up and doing the town. Look at this Ani. Ani! Oh. OH! Ani!
>Come here!
>Get over here, I haven't seen you in 16 fuckin' years. You look terrific!
>This kid was great. They used to call him "Spitshine Ani". I swear. Oh, he'd make your droids look like fucking mirrors. Excuse my language. He was terrific, he was the best. And he made a lot of money for Watto, too. Salut, Ani!
>Relax, will ya, for cryin' out... wha-what's got into you? I'm breaking your balls a little bit, that's all. I'm only kidding with you.
>Ani, I'm only kidding with you. We're having a party. I mean, I just came home, I haven't seen you in a long time and I'm breaking your balls, and now you're getting fuckin' fresh. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you.
>Now go home and get your fuckin' shine box.
Jeremiah Russell
Little did they know they would start the clone Wars a few years after
Christian Nelson
based starfellas poster
Michael Anderson
>be poor
>shithole planet
>shithole part of shithole planet
>house made of debris, live amidst ruin
>try to till the ground so I can plant crops and not die
>clink
>it's an old droid, those shitty military ones the tradies used to have
>keep digging
>there's more droids than dirt
>mfw turns out I'm living on a droid landfill and their leaking power cells gave me cancer
>also crops failed
Some days I wish someone would just blow this shitheap of a planet to hell.
William Walker
Sounds like the start of a good short story
Aiden Perez
Saved, m'lad. Content like this is what keeps old Memesters like me coming back for that next thick, hot mouthful of meme!
Asher Lewis
>Luke....Luuuke.....Luke..quit masturbating so much, Luke.
Chase Cook
>Psst, Tony you fucking idiot shut up
>That's not why he was called "Spitshine Ani"
>I know you were to young to be aware at the time but jesus don't remind lord Vader of that time
Samuel Miller
>t. eufag
Jack Price
Obiwan spent 20 years alone in a desert hut, you think he hasn't force gripped himself into complete insensitivity?
Andrew Ross
>32BBY
Battle of yavin hadn't happened yet
Michael Hall
And just like a rainbow after a storm, that single act of unexpected kindness made Vader felt something he hadn't felt in a while. All those pointless wars, all that unnecessary suffering. All that fighting for bringing order to a world that was chaotic in nature. Ever since he was a kid, all he ever wanted was to be a pilot. But that dream was quickly forgotten. Despite his many victories and conquests across the galaxy, no achievement could ever compare to the humble recognition by another person of a skill he had, like they were recognizing he had value, almost like he...matter. A single tear rolled down his cheek. To Motti's surprise, he gave him a big hug and quietly said with a broken voice through his mask, "thank you". Even if he couldn't return to his pilot days, he could still train other kids like he once was and prevent them from committing the same mistakes he made. Vader left and never looked back. To a simpler life, without hate or fear, but with acceptance and peace.
Joseph Walker
Blake Diaz
That's just where he lived. He brought in bitches from Mos Eisley all the time, though, which is why he knew exactly where to go to find the sketchy pilots.
Ben was a stud.
Jeremiah Wilson
Brody Perry
you know ive been working for a sith lord, right Ben?
Ethan Diaz
If there was an Obi-One, was there an Obi-Two?
Colton Campbell
I miss when the original guy posted this two weeks ago.
Austin James
I'm right here
Jackson Ward
>like he...matter
Stopped reading right there.
Tyler Edwards
>"..dude you're black"
Logan Barnes
It's not the East or the West side
Josiah Long
>day of the laser
my sides
Landon Thomas
NO IT'S NOT
Thomas Young
No it's not
Brayden Phillips
>hey I'm gonna set you up with some great real estate Ani. It's great thing the Empire has been working on and we were gonna surprise you with it
>You don't mind lava, right?
Jack Russell
probably has a sandy desert moon too
Carter Ward
It's not the North or the South side.
Ethan Allen
>>Hey wait a minute, don't I know you from somewhere?
>>*snap*
>>ANAKIN FUCKIN' SKYWALKER
jej
Jack Mitchell
No it's not
Luis Diaz
>"hey, why don't we just make a bunch of those Droideka things. Seems like every time we use them the jedi can't kill them"
Tyler Clark
Hey, it's you!
Camden Cooper
>ancient religion
>20 years ago the religion was one of the central powers of the galactic government
Nani?
Cameron Thompson
Meant for
Hudson Hill
>tfw haven't funnyposted since
Ian Wood
How does that make the force better than a Death Star?
Jose Adams
You're just in a slump. Buck up.
Jason Hall
You know Jason X would have been a better joke... seems like a missed opportunity to me.
Carson Carter
This guy is what it feels like whenever someone says “my prayers are with you” when their mom dies and an atheist decides to weigh in
Dominic Gutierrez
>years after the trade federations embarissing attempt at occupying a planet failed
>got a new job at a droid factory
>its in the middle of nowhere but the bug people here are pretty chill
>walking through the hallway when suddenly
>no fucking way...
>its my old boss from the trade federation
>hes walking next to some old Dracula looking man with a cape
Jack Fisher
its still thousands or millions years old. it was in power but it wasn't created 20 years ago
Kevin Morris
Absolutely based
Connor Moore
I was waiting for some variation on this
Liam Martin
he will join us or die
WE GOT DEATH STAR
WE GOR DEATH STAR
WE GOT DEATH STAR
Luis Davis
Kek
Evan Rivera
No more races, Padme.
I said I don't race pods no more, maybe you didn't hear, you been in the senate a long time
Daniel Taylor
ITS THE V TO THE A TO THE D E R
VADER
WE CONSTRUCTED THE DEATH STAR
Charles Rivera
>Did you ever hear the tragedy of Salvatore "Big Pussy" Bonpensiero?
>I thought not. It's not a story the Feds would tell you. It's a paisan legend. Big Pussy was a wiseguy of the family who lived many years ago. He was so powerful and so connected that he could use the family to influence the bookies to create dough. He had such a knowledge of the old country that he could even keep the balls he cared about from breaking.
>The omerta is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural.
>What happened to him?
>He became so powerful... the only thing he was afraid of was losing his gabagool, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, and then one night, his apprentice busted his balls in front of his crew. Ironic. He could save others from disrespect, but not himself.
>He was a good capo.
Jayden Cox
Look at all that wasted open space. They could cram like twice as much production equipment in there.
Presumably they're expensive and the space jews are cheap?
Ryder Walker
Arent the trade federation dudes space asians?
They have asian accents
Dylan Sanchez
>new star wars moves aren't even good for shitposting purposes
I wonder if 20 years from now they'll have shat out another trilogy bad enough to make us think "well the Disney movies weren't so bad after all"?
Brayden Green
Did the Separatist forces have a legitimate grievance with the Republic in your opinion?
Tyler Murphy
Admiral Motti was right. In other news, his full name was Conan Anontio Motti.
Ayden Moore
kek even my asian friend calls them the asians
Wyatt James
extremely based
Elijah Edwards
They're space chinks
>Dominate trade
>Army of robots
>Evil
Liam Perry
nah, baring 2 the prequels were atleast a visual spectacle to look at. meme podracing or darth maul's fight but they are much better scenes that any tie fighter chase or fight scene from the nu trilogy.
only way it can get worse is if they try even harder with the progressive themes and comedic bits so it ends up like a remake of space balls with a minority recast.
Matthew Miller
Tarkin is the autorithy in the room, not Vader and it falls to him to stop the autistic half tin can fuck who mumbles "muh Padme" between two breath
David Sullivan
Jackson Reyes
>he could even keep the balls he cared about from breaking.
Adam Wright
Why does a retard like Vader have more power than an admiral? Why does Sheev keep building giant space balls instead of fighting the rebels? No wonder the Empire lost.
Colton Ramirez
I like this one. One dog has the high ground, the other dog has the low ground, and this guy's sayin', "Don't try it."
Eli Robinson
effay here
gonna go to the hairdresser tomorrow. how do i get this haircut without showing them a picture of Admiral Motti?
Austin Green
maybe try to find the actor in a different role. I don't think your average person would recognize him outside of star wars.
Christopher Lee
deepest lore
Jayden Cooper
It was many years later
Julian Powell
The books prologue indicates that Palpatine is just a dumb politician that is bossed around by other politicians or some such shit.
Julian Price
How redpilled is george
Ayden Peterson
Kek
Why did they have a top secret sucession meeting in a factory
Jack Thomas
John Richardson
Vader is like your slut coworker who got "saved" and now wants to talk about her Jesus-bo all the g'damned time.
Benjamin James
>Can't make a coherent counter-argument
>Get mad
>Start choking the opponent
>Have to be embarrassingly ordered by Tarkin to stop
Jacob Cox
Conan?
Antonio?
Nolan Thomas
>uucck, oh no, I’m choking, help mepftttAHAHA just kidding Vader, you fucking dork. Go play with your toy sword and gay costume somewhere else
Kayden Lee
> choking hazard
> toy actually chokes.
Poetry.
Alexander Lee
> Motti later submitted a sharply worded incident report regarding the matter in which he stated that he would submit to discipline if necessary, but objected to Vader's attempt to proselytize him in his religion and stressing that it was important to take pride in this project that had taken so much of the Empire's time and effort.
> gets Force choked by Vader
> complains to the Death Star HR Department
What a pussy.
Jackson Cook
Based
Ayden Adams
The Force can kill planets too.
Chase Perez
> Motti's full name was revealed by Star Wars creator George Lucas on an episode of Late Night with Conan O'Brien on May 1, 2007. When Lucas was challenged to a trivia question by a fan—Late Night Associate Producer Jordan Schlansky—as to the name of the officer who Darth Vader Force chokes in A New Hope, Lucas jokingly replied "Conan Antonio Motti", a tuckerization of Conan O'Brien's name. The name was then confirmed in-universe by Star Wars Legends novels and eventually in the canon novel Tarkin.
Yikes!
Brody Murphy
This. The Force is literally God in Star Wars.
Ian Sullivan
Was Vader ever sent to speak with the HR?
Hunter Murphy
See, that's how you do it. Fuck the lorefags.
Joseph Ortiz
>toy is actually being choked
hahahhahaha
Luis White
god damnit I miss wookiepediaposting
Joshua Ortiz
Ryan Nguyen
Jesus this thread made me feel a little less dead inside, thanks anons.
Jackson Lee
Chase Barnes
Shut your fucking pie hole queer
Austin Gray
This is so wizard!
Gavin Kelly
Don't turn around, uh oh
The commissar's in town, uh oh
Brandon Garcia
lol
Jordan Morgan
Is their no HR on the ship? Is he allowed to get away with it because the CCTV footage doesn't show him physically choking someone?
Owen Flores
Vader was supposed to be an enforcer, the lapdog of the emperor, not some super powerful space jesus. He was outranked by those moffs in the council.
This whole scene was a metaphor for the struggle between the dying old ways and the new 'materialistic' Empire.
Camden Walker
He’s more a commissar; technically outside the chain of command, but retaining the ability to influence.
Aaron Miller
Underrated post
Jordan Torres
James Harris
The death star is a sith weapon
yes, it blows up planets, but its real purpose is to instill fear in the people.
fear, power, malice, control...these emotions are where the dark side draws its power
By putting the entire galaxy into a state of terror, sheev was cementing his place as the most powerful sith lord ever.
Sheev is a politician, yes, but at his core he is a sith lord and like vader, believes the dark side is more powerful than ships and weapons.
Brandon Lopez
more 'He was a good friend" memes please
Aaron Sanchez
>disney sequel quotes in the "force dream world"
dropped
Kayden Smith
>Imagine the smell
>Of what?
You just know this is what stormtrooper armor and all the space ships smell like
Blake Cook
sure
Grayson Cook
Is Aniposting the epic new meme?
Adrian Bailey
>some spook in a crazy costume and mask implied to have magical powers with no stated rank was just pacing around your meeting with even higher-ranked officers
>is this guy supposed to be like a court jester or something?
Parker Bailey
Alexander Murphy
Anyone have the pasta where this is translated into real world events with George Bush?
Ayden Ross
Austin Martin
>I get why the Stormtroopers accompany Vader, they probably respect how he slaps the officers around.
He's also essentially wearing the uniform of a soldier, not the uniform of an officer. They probably see him as their comrade, not as a commander. Fucker even fights on the front lines all the time.
Landon Parker
Fucking LEL
Brody Walker
how does it compare to having sex
Ethan Morgan
This.
vader was hated by the naval officers but loved by the troops.
I think even nu-EU has recanonized this
Aiden Brown
I think it would all smell like cheap plastic
Kayden Jenkins
I just kind of get the sense of the inside of a games workshop. Like the smell of polish, glue, metal and body odour
Colton Evans
>tfw you have to pretend to respect the cape wearing autist because he's the favorite of the robe wearing autist
life is hell as an Imperial officer
Ryder Roberts
It amazes me to this day how many people got pleb-filtered by Attack of The Clones.
Jango never wanted to kill Padme. The whole situation was a ploy by Palpatine to lead them to the clones and make them think they had discovered kamino on their own, while also pushing Anakin and Padme closer together so that Anakin would be more susceptible to the dark side.
Jesus christ
Kayden Richardson
Obi-Wan didn't know any of that though
Carson Ward
He's supposed to be clever. I think he probably pieced most of it together
Caleb Johnson
I remember reading something about their ai being prone to going rouge or something
Andrew Perry
If he did the events of ROTJ wouldn't have happened since he'd have also realized the Clone Army was financed by Dooku/Sheev.
Leo Davis
>prone to going rouge
Well that makes sense, they always did seem like fags
Cooper Gutierrez
where is this from
Kayden Wilson
I mean in the years since, while he was living as a hermit jerking off to sand people, he probably had enough time and distance to reflect on what had happened and realised he'd been played
Noah Wilson
Seconding this
Asher Moore
Probably, although he might've just been busy tasting Mos Eisley poon.
Mason Scott
>the day of the laser
Nathan Carter
This is why Yea Forums is the only board.
Jason Sanders
Umm... nigga?
Brayden Bennett
>The whole situation was a ploy by Palpatine to
still doodoo my dude
Michael Davis
comfy thread
Anthony Hernandez
Way to tell him reddit lelele memedia!
Jaxon Cruz
>It is another muster because Vader cant find his lightsaber and thinks someone of us hide it. When in all probability it is behind his tantrum globe chamber. AGAIN!!!
Zachary Wilson
Clearly he wasn't frightened of his sorceror's ways, or his sad devotion to that ancient religion. I mean, he couldn't even conjure up the stolen data tapes. Pretty weak, desu senpai.
Gabriel Thompson
In the EU mountains are alive and can cry and extragalactic force immune invaders that look like shitty warhammer 40k aliens show up.
Easton Morris
KEK
Angel Powell
I know it's meant to be deep thought but it looks like he's having a very thoughtful moment.
James Thomas
>commands vader around like nothing.
KINDA agree. Too it looked like that Vader was a political officer and him and Tarkin knew each other on a personal level.
Since Tarkin is officially in charge on the station, Vader is not going to overrule a Moff for a trivial thing.
Xavier Gomez
T R A S H
R
A
S
H
Ian Williams
Seething.
Cooper Ross
>That's it? He just choked a guy? Man I was on Vaders strike force during the last mission. He made us shut off all the lights and hang back while he just started wading through the rebels. And I mean literally wading man. He just fired up that laser sword of his and just started flying around effortlessly hacking down rebels and hurling them around with that magic he uses. It was bizarre, because Vader always just seemed kind of slow and plodding to me but this guy, man. It was almost like it was a completely different person from the Vader you and I know. Lieutenant Fett was even telling me the other day that Vader is actually a Yeddeye, one of those weird shaman that fought the clone wars that the Major keeps telling us never happened even though the Major himself has a medal for meritous service from the war. Man, the empire is so confusing. Ah well only two more years and I'm mustering my ass to Aldeeran university. It'll be hothin' but hot Twilek bitches and Aldeeranian daughters for this trooper!
Joseph Morales
He looks like the thinking face emoji
Robert Nguyen
Chars bro
Angel Carter
>dude, we're headed to alderrann now, I was hoping to go down and sample some of that hot hippy trim myself but Tarkin has denied all shore leave for some reason. I think he's a fag.
Wyatt Baker
Leave me alone Ben I wasn't even the one who killed you... Please I have a business trip to Bonadan tomorrow...
Brayden Thompson
Don't worry, that one was also me
I post some version of that in every Motti thread I see
David Fisher
Thank you for reminding me, I meant to go over sleep with you, too.
You see sleep is a biological process engaged in by many beings, both sentient and non-sentient, such as humans for the purpose of rest and rejuvenation. Sentient beings that slept generally did so according to a set routine and often utilized a comfortable piece of furniture, such as a bed, for the purpose.[1] During sleep, many beings experienced dreams, nighttime visions that often played out as fantastical versions of things they had seen in real-life. A lack of sleep could have deleterious effects on one's psyche.[2]
After Anakin Skywalker began experiencing Force visions during sleep of his mother, Shmi Skywalker Lars, dying, he began having trouble sleeping.[2] He later experienced this same problem after witnessing a Force vision during sleep of his wife Padmé Amidala dying in childbirth. Darth Sidious killed his master, Darth Plagueis, in his sleep.[3]
My word, you were there for that last one, weren’t you? I suppose he couldn’t have been a good friend.
Robert Mitchell
based
Luis Bell
>not posting the picture
Jace Brown
>Beeen. Beeeeen. Beeeeen.
>What?
>Ben, I can't sleep. Can you sing me a bedtime song?
Ethan Sullivan
>death star destroyed
>The Force is still binding life
You're autism
Alexander Morris
>Vader tells me that one of you took his... sword thing. No one is in trouble, I just want whoever it was to give it back.
Angel Brown
>tfw you realize Darth Vader probably eats in the same mess hall as the Stormtroopers
>eats the same slop they're served
>and he's fucking thankful for it
Anthony Flores
NO GET OUT OF THERE!!!!
Henry Perez
the picture fits so well with it
dare I ask...
was vader...
autistic?
Hunter Walker
>autistic guy in a cape who serves the autistic guy in a robe
Isaiah Kelly
was sheev autistic
Mason Gray
>Hey man, you were dating that Padme chick back in the day, right? Great girl, always so full of life. Heard she had a baby or two coming. Her man must be a lucky guy.
Asher Lewis
>"Man, I may be black, but at least I'm not one of those 1313 hood niggas that think they're bounty hunters and then get blasted one day. I'm making something of myself here."
Evan Murphy
>Lord Vader, you, uh...you wanna go race bikes or something? I heard you're pretty good.
Nathaniel Cooper
Obi posting is my favorite meme
John Hall
Well... I guess I could take it out for a spin
Sebastian Hernandez
why is it so shiny
Joshua Rodriguez
People with autism tend to be obsessive over that sort of thing
Jonathan Reyes
DUDE THE EU LMAO
Jaxson Lee
I think he needed to be to plan and scheme for so long
Benjamin Reed
>force users are magical autists
>the light side advocates embracing the autism fully and cuttijg yourself off from society
>the dark side advocates sperging out and letting your emotions run wild
It all makes sense now
Camden Adams
Gotta look slick for when the Emperor visits in person.
Henry Bailey
Is that a real Woodoo Hide shine Lord Vader?
How many times a week do you buff?
Nathaniel Collins
Don't be too proud of this technological terror you've constructed
Carter Sanders
The star wars comic shows him killing troopers all the time tho
Camden Moore
What an absolutely fantastic scene.
Here you see multiple factions vying for power: The Death Star fanboys, the ArmyNavyfags, Tarkin, and Vader.
The ArmyNavyfags, represented by Tagge, are nervous that their significance in the Empire will wane with the Death Star's public reveal. They're making a stink about the stolen data tapes because they want to delay the station's activation.
The DS fanboys see that they have the chance to be the biggest swinging dick in the galaxy and are eager to get on with it.
In walks Tarkin and Vader.
Tarkin announces the dissolution of the Senate and states that fear of the Death Star will maintain order. While saying this, he looks at Motti, who smirks, thinking he's getting commended for being a loyal DS fanboy. So Motti gets a big head and boasts about the station's invulnerability. While saying this, he smirks back at Tarkin, he's playing it up, reaffirming his loyalty.
Vader admonishes Motti, pointing out that The Force is more powerful than the technological terror of the Death Star. It's important to remember that Vader, while technically under Tarkin's command, was placed on the station to be the Emperor's commisar and ensure nobody gets any bright ideas about using the superweapon to stage a coup. His statement is an open threat to everybody in the room.
Motti doesn't get the hint. He thinks the Station makes his faction top dog and believes he has Tarkin's backing because of those aforementioned smirks. He never explicitly doubts that the Force or the Jedi are real, just that, like the Imperial Navy, their time has come and gone. So Vader chokes him.
Everyone gets the point.
That whole scene of bickering officers and statesmen scheming for power in a polished board room is meant to contrast with the dusty, ragtag Rebel Alliance, which is always depicted as unified and focused in their goals. It is extremely subtle and well executed.
And yet all anyone talks about is
>Haha, he doesn't believe in Jedi, haha!
Aaron Campbell
>"sticking it to that nigger Windu"
Ian Butler
It's actually a good scene. Provides a clear background for the original trilogy, the state of the Empire, the fall of the Senate, and the construction of the Death Star in about 5 minutes, something the prequels couldn't do in more than 7 hours of convoluted nonsense.
Noah Morales
>something the prequels couldn't do in more than 7 hours of convoluted nonsense.
low iq detected
Robert Allen
holy fucking reddit
William Foster
Great Jedi Purge? Are you kidding me Vader? Theres not enough evidence to support this ever happening.
Luke Thomas
the scene has always been a favorite of mine.
it helps it that the movie probably spends too long getting the droids to luke and luke to Obi Wan, to the point that we start to forget about the Empire, so the contrast is very strong.
Zachary Martinez
This happened in the comics.
Leo Gonzalez
So something like Mauler as a Jedi, while Russel Greer is on the dark side?
Brayden Carter
>I don’t know about you but 6,000 Jedi seems like quite a lot
Nathaniel Foster
This. Combined with Obi-Wan’s tale and the capture of Leia, you learn everything you need to know about the backdrop.
Connor Clark
>The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Force
>luke uses the force to destroy the deathstar
embarassing
Kayden Young
Brilliant analysis from Yea Forums of all places
I've seen this movie a million times but I never thought of how well-laid out it is. But of course it is, because no one forgets this scene; it's memorable and does a fantastic job of explaining everything in depth without even getting close to boring people. Lucas would have had a much, much better reception for the prequels had he taken the genius of this scene to heart.
James Garcia
It really helps hammer home the mystery and potential power of the force, too.
On the one hand, Vader literally lifts a finger to choke someone, remains perfectly calm, and never implies he's exerting the slightest bit of effort to do so.
On the other, the fact his face, breath and body are completely hidden means that we can't be sure he's just hiding any strain.
Much better than some over the top dickwaving or too deep 4 u shit.
Cooper Robinson
I see the scene in a new light now, cool thanks user
Kevin Nguyen
Palpatine probably pushed out propaganda suggesting that the force was a myth and jedi were simply scam artists trying to subvert the republic.
Adam Nelson
Six million? Give me a break, Vader. I know you people aren’t very good with math, but seriously? Come on. Ancient magic? What the hell. Now tell me who are the owners of most star destroyers? What is the most common dual citizenship among politicians in the senate? Who are the owners of most media? It’s so obvious, yet nobody seems to care. At least, I’m proud to say that the Death Star remains free and uncompromised. But the name isn’t catchy enough. I’m planning to rename it the Daily Stormer. What do you think?
Alexander Cooper
kek
Evan Gutierrez
Dominic Robinson
>Luke, did I ever tell you about the Sith Assassin Asajj Ventress?, She was the apprentice to Count Dooku (Who was a Good Friend) and was this Sexy Bald Dathomirian Lady who Dual Wielded Lightsabers. We used to fight all the time during the Clone Wars, and every time we did, Flirting would follow. She even saved my life from Darth Maul (who was ANOTHER Good Friend) and His Brother, Anyway, After she Rescued me, she suggested we let this flirting come to light and fuck, right then and there, after all Sex isnt forbidden for a Jedi, and the council wouldnt miss me for another evening. Ill tell you this Luke, she certainly knew her way around the bed, after all, Nightsister Culture is about Dominating Males, and ill tell you this, she certainly did. She even put on her Nightsister Leathers for me! Made me nut in seconds seeing her in that, She rubbed it all over her Smooth Head!. She was a Good Friend
Kayden Bennett
>the genius of this scene
That motherfucker didn't know what he was doing, and he was FAR from being a "genius". Lucas stole that scene, as it's pretty much a direct ripoff of Kubricks "war room" scenes from Dr. Strangelove.
Pretty much every shot in "Star Wars" was ripped off from some other movie, be it a Kubrick, Kurosawa, or old school Buster Keaton film. Lucas is a hack.
Logan Wright
>Lucas stole that scene, as it's pretty much a direct ripoff of Kubricks "war room" scenes from Dr. Strangelove.
Really?
Easton Bailey
>I remember watching you win the Boonta Eve Podracing Classic back on Tatooine with my old man back in 32 BBY
He looks older but the actor was only 30 when the movie was filmed.
Asher Long
Space. It's from space.
Alexander Martin
looks like the tortanic cinematic
Cooper Bailey
You tell me.
He stole the entire "Han and Luke fight the Tie fighters after escaping the Death Star" scene pretty much frame for frame from a film called "12 O-Clock High" about bombers running missions during WW II.
Total hack. Him and his Jew buddy, both.
Liam Gutierrez
Landon Evans
Do you watch movies on mute?
Justin Robinson
Something tells me you've never seen Dr. Strangelove
Luis Ortiz
who are the
>niggers
>gypsies
>jews
of star wars?
Lincoln Brooks
Brandon Morgan
>niggers
wookies
>gypsies
jawas
>jews
trade federation dudes or watto
Parker Wright
formerly sheeving
Jaxon Robinson
disney canon sucks gorilla dick
Bentley Nguyen
>it's bullshitting user relies on nobody having watched the movies he's using as a bludgeon episode
Haven't we had this rerun enough times?
Asher Peterson
wouldn't it have been simpler just to have Kamino contact them and state their army was ready instead of letting them go on a goose chase that needed to many variable to go right in order for it to work, especially in the case were they captured Jango only for him to tell them info that could jeopardize the whole plan.
Angel Reed
>a few hundred Jedi in the entire galaxy
>everyone is supposed to think their powers are real
Matthew Campbell
No. He used an exhaust port the designer purposefully left the cover out of the plans for so it could be blow'd up.
Adrian Morgan
They would never capture Jango because he wasn't on scene at all, only watching. At least in theory.
Further, Palpatine needed Padme to think she was in danger to both prepare the senate for war, and to get Anakin to serve as her bodyguard so they could fall in love etc.
If Kamino just contact the jedi council, they would have immediately told them to fuck off and disband the army. But Obi-Wan finding it alone himself acts suspectingly and then we know the rest
Logan Bailey
>Ben was a stud.
go to bed, Ben, this is getting sad
Adam Sanders
Caleb Gomez
>and ill tell you this, she certainly did
kek
Josiah Scott
>could you choke Dantooine too Lord Vader?
Mason Hill
At least the prequels somewhat explained how the Empire came to be, despite the execution being handled a bit clumsily.
The sequels didn't explain shit and only said that the nu-empire and rebellion existed. The only mention of politics came from the novels and from a fucking deleted scene.
Tyler Lewis
Bullshit. Why would Vader give a fuck about him being called Anakin by some senile old woman?
Lucas Anderson
Lucas Vader got his angst out of his system upon donning the suit, and became a pragmatic killing machine.
Disney Vader never grew out of his Linkin Park phase.
Blake White
See? You faggots can have a good star Wars thread after all.
Brandon Phillips
Why does this have me giggling so fucking hard?
Gabriel Stewart
>Lucas Vader got his angst out of his system upon donning the suit, and became a pragmatic killing machine.
>implying that EU Vader wasn't a sad moping sack of shit
Historical revisionists, leave
Jack Sanchez
Yeah, that comic just made him look embarrassed:
>"This man is Anakin Skywalker"
>"Uh, n-no I'm not. SHUT UP!"
Jaxson Miller
>implying that EU Vader wasn't a sad moping sack of shit
EUfags, leave.
Jordan Davis
>Lucas Vader got his angst out of his system upon donning the suit, and became a pragmatic killing machine.
Lucas made "Star Wars" for an adult audience, and that's clearly demonstrated by the fairly realistic and frequent depictions of violence, and adult themes throughout the entire film. We've got:
- Vader crushing a mans throat and killing him
- Leia blasting a stormtrooper
- Ben hacking off a dudes arm and killing another in the cantina
- Stormtrooper genocide of the Jawa's and Lukes only remaining family
That shit's pretty heavy for a kid flick.
It wasn't until "Star Wars" took off that Lucas got the idea to make it more kid friendly for (((marketing))) purposes.
Leo Ramirez
He was pretty edgy in the legends EU. Even stabbed himself to kill a ressurrected Maul and then said that the only thing he hated more than Maul was himself. Basically, EU is garbage in general.
Christopher Stewart
There was one good Darth Vader comic that they published in 2015 and since then a bunch of far less talented writers have been trying to do the same thing only they are shit. What the nucanon wants Vader to be like
>Anakin Skywalker was weak. I destroyed him!
What the comics keep saying instead because they suck
>m-muh Padme..
Liam Martinez
IDK why but reading those green text brought a tear to my eye
Kevin Hughes
Well duel accepted, but for it to be an accurate metaphor, you get the pistol, but both your hands are chopped off
William Parker
I won't call it adult per se but it was definitely for people between 15 to 24.
Joseph Evans
impressive
Eli Russell
Holy shit kek
Nathan Morris
Loud and hard to overhear
Luis Powell
dark vapour is my favorite character
Hunter Thompson
this one is fucking gold
Anthony Cook
I bought a bunch of Empire propaganda posters and I wish this one came with it
Ian Bennett
requesting the CIA/Bane version of this
Sebastian Wilson
Not only that but he had to have it all blended into liquid and a huge fucking strawlike feeding tube
> eatin at the Death Star mess hall with my platoon after a costly victory on FeluciA
> serving us fried Acklay and a salad of different Felucian vegetation
> Vader stumbles in carrying a bucket with a red glowing plastic Krazy straw sticking out of it
> he plops right down next to me and my squad mates
> *robotic inhale* then a loud hollow *SLUUUUUUURP* through his straw
> Great intuition Theta squadron, the idea to cut down the trees and have them fall on the huts of the natives almost made me chuckle keep up the good work
> his cape fucking knocks over my blue milk as he gets up
> “Thanknyou Lord Vader!
Jose Carter
Wookiee are Mexicans and gun fans gungans were niggers
Christian Bennett
> MFW Vader is your Death Star secret santa and he just gets you a $20 Subway giftcard. Great no effort, no thought gift -- Sith for brains.
Aaron Nguyen
Parker Martinez
this is actually a kino analysis for a kino scene
and i bet george lucas had nothing to do with it and fought AGAINST putting it in the film
look at me a quoted the thing
Josiah Hill
The hangar ...welding fumes and carries a distinct odor of ozone, a faint acrid smell."
Jose Robinson
I wish Darth Vader was my dad.
Kevin Young
Quality post
Jose Jackson
Watch the prequels and then tell me what you think.
Jacob Richardson
Just say he’s from a war movie or something
Blake Fisher
its crazy how memorable and quotable this scene is
the only prequel politics/senate scene I can remember and quote which had any impact was of course
"THE FIRST GALACTIC EMPIRE, for a safer and secure society"
James Roberts
Most impressive
Logan Bell
hello bump limit
Landon Wood
I'll choose hand, you can choose pistol.
I beat you to death barehanded while your severed stumps flail uselessly at a pistol you'll never be able to fire.
Lucas Smith
The Council passed me over for promotion. You knew.
Juan Lewis
Tbh the political stuff in Revenge of the Sith was some of the prequels' most quotable lines
>So this is how democracy dies. To thunderous applause.
And
>I AM THE SENATE
But that was in part because George wanted to beat the audience over the head with the message. This scene is a lot more subtle and tells you a lot in a very short span of time, but still very quotable. Lucas is just terrible at writing.
Blake Miller
Great post, user.
Made me appreciate Star Wars even more.
Samuel Walker
Lincoln Watson
What is this a reference to?