Why can't Americans sit for over 2 hours without shoving gallons of sugar and fat into their mouths?

Why can't Americans sit for over 2 hours without shoving gallons of sugar and fat into their mouths?

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>he unironically doesent go to the movie with home cooked meals

Sneed

Why do you hate freedom?
Not my fault I don't need a loicense to fucking breathe or practice free speech

If I want to take a fucking hefty bag of jiffy pop to the moves I damn well will, muhammad farooq-longbottom

Why can't I sit in a theater for 2 hours without needing to pee?

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Type 2 diabetes.

Do yuros really not have popcorn at their theaters?

I started to bring white russian. It's nice.

I don't buy any food at the cinema or take any snacks

How else are the theaters suppose to make a buck?

>visit "the states"
>go to a movie theater
>order a small coke and medium pop corn
>literally get like a liter of coke and pop corn that could easily feed a small village
putting butter on pop corn is delicious though, I'll at least give you yanks that

We want the biggest most extended dopamine release.
Food, Drank. Alcholol / Drugs + 3hr capeshit movie

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Have sex

>actually attending a theater
>2019
Gross, don't tell me you people actually still go to those disgusting anachronisms.

I miss anticipation of any kind, be it movies, games etc. I haven't been excited about anything for years.

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>americans
>pic is an asian
please have sexual intercourse

Partake in fornication

By my 3rd soda I need to pee pretty badly. Not really a problem because I can just pee into the used cups

You get thrown out of the theater if they catch you, though. Once I was in the back of the theater and filling up my third piss cup and then a really hot girl shined a flash light in my eyes and said I would have to come to the back room with them, and there was 2 security guards by the door so I didn’t have a chance to escape

Here’s the truth= it’s the air conditioning. Relaxing in air conditioning after being outside in any capacity makes you pee constantly like a race horse.

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This, I always get high as fuck for capeshit, go to the theater, order booze and tendies and become comfortably numb

>He uses a liquid volume measurement to measure sugar

Do Americans really do this?

they don't even know what sugar looks like anymore. they use corn syrup for everything

>not measuring your popcorn consumption in hectares

where im from people just pre drink and pre smoke before as that is not allowed in the theater

Never before have I cherished my freedom to get shitfaced at a public movie theater as much as I am in this moment.
I'm so sorry, user. Maybe one day you'll join us in greatness.

Because my normal healthy diet is bland and if I'm ganna pay 10 dollars for a fucking movie i may as well get some tasty treats to add to the experience. You gotta treat yourself sometimes.

This is true, and it's called cold diuresis.

last time I had movie theatre popcorn shit made me sick

imagine having to pay to watch a fucking documentary and getting your ass sore

why cant americans sit for over 2 hours without getting shot?

>Americans are free to eat however much they want whenever they want wherever they want
>Europe needs a license just to purchase bread and water
Lmao

It's not funny. My heart bleeds for any white man that isn't free.

Because when you're nervous the body processes urine faster. Get out of the house more, talk to strangers, stop being such a NEET and you can last 3 hours without pissing like me.

Or smoke weed before you go. Works like a charm. Relaxes you so much even if you have to piss you can literally forget about it.

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>sit in class
>get shot
>goto concert
>get mowed down by machine guns
>goto bar with ur friends
>get shot at
>goto gay bar with ur bros
>shot by guy with AR
>pulled over by cops and tell them you have a concealed carry permit and gun on you with ur hands up high
>get shot immediately

lol americans

>apply for bread license
>pay twenty quid to magistrate of breads
>wait 4-6 weeks for license to arrive in mail
>stand in bread-line in the back behind more deserving refugees
>finally get your bread after surprise license inspection by cashier
>arrive home and attempt to butter bread
>swat team surrounds house, demands surrender of deadly weapon
>18 hour standoff as bobbies try talking you out of your home
>quintessentially British individual driving delivery truck plows through their blockade, into your kitchen and kills you

That girl is a chink btw

Just wear an adult diaper like everybody else. Or continue to be the moron who misses 5 minutes of the movie.

Did none of these people go to see the LOTR trilogy?

Better question: why cant i watch a two hour movie without getting the need to down an entire mickey of cheap liquor

Jus tlooking at all that soda gives me a headache

Because you've ascended

B..b..but, at least I don't need a TV license.

So it's California. Got it.

Or a masturbatory permission slip.

Popcorn
>sugar and fat

Its salt and starch, asshole

Its what happens when you get burned one too many times. I havent anticipated a video game since Fable III because of how hard i was burnt by it.

or washington, vancouver, new york. houston texas, etc.

I think it's something with the fountain soda they have in most theaters. I find a lot of fountain soda really wrecks my bladder, whereas I've never had to pee drinking the Blue Sky sodas at Alamo.

why is everybody so obsessed with americans?

Imagine if you had to live one of those places that wasn't America.

>drinking alone in a movie theatre with premixed white Russians

Are you all right fren

Anything you want to talk about

Non alcoholic fatty liver

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Having a hard time believing this is entirely satire, I wouldn’t be all that surprised if some of you degenerates did this

I think it’s autism.

Maybe it's Maybelline