Snake house bad

Reminder that the literal translation of Harry Potter in Portuguese is slang for Harry Faggot

Reminder that JK Rowling lived in Portugal many years

No, that would be Momma Mia. It's close though.

>en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religious_debates_over_the_Harry_Potter_series
Muzzies don't like it either.

You'd assume that in a world where magicians live in cooperation with the government any advancement would be at least 100 years ahead. But what did I expect from the dullest franchise ever. Seriously why didn't the "wizards" just cast themselves out of the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises? Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. Noone wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though

"Deh!" The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He wasnt being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

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>all right wingers are religious
>all religious people are right wing
Only a jew would think this

To be fair snek house was founded by an evil wizard.

The intro doesn't fit the op, you absolute retard

western (ie christian) religious people have no complaints with HP friends

regards,
religious guy

ps: don't spread bullshit

>Momma Mia

Take it to Yea Forums you fucking numale tumblrina

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I have plenty of complaints against Harry Potter, speak for yourself prottie.

It's not lazy, snakes have been universally considered bad, since pre biblical times

Owls in nature also aren't wise. It's just ancient symbolism that survived into modern times

youtu.be/tAfi0X-cJag

Absolutely awful. It's copy-pasted from a thread that doesn't relate to this one, the "No!" has been replaced with "Deh" and isn't on its own line. If you were going to copy paste the pasta, at least get the Deh version of the tier list too.
0/10 fucking kill yourself.

>all the brave kids go here in one house
>the middling kids go into either the smart house or the undefined house
>and the evil kids all go here
>and then in the final battle for the school, we'll lock all the evil kids in the dungeons because they're evil
BRAVO

you make a lot of assumptions about me whatever you are

>tfw the Chad realized he had to be more humble and mature to win her heart
>tfw the beta who professed to love her while joining a fucked up cult was also the reason why she got killed
>tfw the Chad had a good heart and mastered being an animongus just so he could help his bro out beforehand

Why is James Potter a more interesting character than Harry?

I'm more of a Luigi guy, thanks

>MOMMA mia

Harry is a bitch, born AND raised

o know i dun fukef up the spelin of teh faggy swede film

>I was only pretending to be retarded

>universally considered bad
We're instinctively afraid of them because mammals have been predated by them since mammals existed.
Archetypically though they're not objectively "bad," they're tricksters and guardians of dangerous and great wisdom.
Their physiology also helps perpetuate this myth of being magic is that snakes have bifurcated dicks, so if you throw a male snake into a fire, when it writhes and dies its two dicks pop out near it's "waist" so people thought that those were their legs, and they were trying to transform their shape to get away from the fire. Throw in that they can kill you with a single bite and primitive man says "HOLY SHIT THIS FUCKING THING IS MAGIC!"

Did you accidentally merge two intros or something?

false, we couldn't give two shits about small mammals, what they have represented is a toxic bite to everyone that fucked with them for all time

this has to be bait
nobody can make so many errors in that pasta with such a fucking awful introduction

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>we couldn't give two shits about small mammals
Speak for yourself dickwad

It’s the venomous aspect mostly, same thing with spiders.

rodent fingers wrote this post.

my cat has eaten tens of thousands of you :^)

>what they have represented is a toxic bite to everyone that fucked with them for all time
You do know that there are more non venomous snakes than venomous, right?
What I mean about mammals is that the ancestor of all mammals was eaten by snek, and most of it's descendants were ALSO eaten by snek. It's instinct, a biological imperative to be spooped by snek baked right into the mammalian brain.
Humans, thanks to intelligence and abstraction, can deconstruct and examine these reactions, and attribute them to something else. Since it is such an ancient hard wired instinct it evokes a dark shadowy part of the mind where other myths and mysterious things that go bump in the night come from.
Are you picking up what I'm laying down?

I'm saying that you're mistaken

What I am saying, sir, that it is indeed you who are mistaken.

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>brave: gryffindor
>loyal: hufflepuff
>smart: ravenclaw
>literally hitler: slytherin
How come the smartest student, the most loyal student and the bravest students were all in Gryffindor?

>loyal: Hufflepuff
No, that was just the "none of the above" house.

>How come the smartest student, the most loyal student and the bravest students were all in Gryffindor?
Hermione couldn't be split into three houses

Literally orgy-house.

Then we agree she belonged in the oven?

Hyenas are better animals than lions since they don't eat their own babies

>This pasta is good
"No!"

Lions dont eat their own babies, they kill all the babies of a previous male Lion.

>bible shit is only good when snyder does it

The original idea was that harry, ron, and hermoine were all supposed to be from the different houses.

As an arachnophobe this isn't quite on the same level.

With snakes it's a danger, a fight or flight response. You get a sudden jolt of adrenaline and your brain makes a split second calculation of whether you kill it or leave it be.

With spiders it's.. deeper. It's a subconscious terror I can't control. A revulsion, a base fear, that even outright talking myself through it ("I'm a thousand times it's size, it's 15 feet away" etc) does nothing to. It is a gutteral, primal fear that goes way beyond "can this kill me before I kill it". But I have absolutely no idea why because I've never been bitten by a spider. I have, however, always been terrified of them.

And now I'm closing this thread to avoid the inevitable spider shitposters.

That, and Draco starting out as a sort of asshole friend that later turns dark would have made things much more cliche and also much better than what we got

Why the hell would houses even be chosen based on personality traits? In the real world, people are sorted at RANDOM.

The only reason Malfoy and Potter don't hit is off is because he makes fun of Ron.
If he hadn't met ron the story would have butterfly effected off in a completely different story.

Why did the rest of the founders even keep the Slytherin house around once Salazar went all Madara Uchiha on them?

>lions will eat their young. don't sound very honourable to me
Only a zoomy would think this.

>hating huck finn
cringe

Because they can? It would be useful if you could sort people based on who they'd likely get along with. Also the house system at my school wasn't completely random, they always put families in the same house, even parents/children/cousins.

because James was an asshole for most of his life, but as time went on he realized who shit everyone else was off. He is reverse Harry upbringing wise, but the self-sacrifice carries over through both of them.
Snake niggers can fuck off

>Snake niggers
>not knowing about self-sacrifice

You get assigned to the first house whose criteria you fulfill in the order Slytherin, Gryffindor and Ravenclaw. If you aren't evil, brave or smart they'll put you in Hufflepuff and feed you some feel-good talk about being a good friend

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>Snake niggers
>not knowing about self-sacrifice

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>You get assigned to
Bullshit. Harry tells the hat to fuck off and he doesn't want to be in Slytherin, and he explaisn later that the hat takes your requests into consideration.