Why didn't we get any scene of Cap eating like a walrus?

His metabolism is 4x that of a normal man. Even in the Shawarma scene he's not eating way more than the others.

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>Looking for realism
>In power fantasy flicks for teens

Are Americans really like this?

Cause it's Chris Evans, not Brad Pitt

OP’s homosexuality is 4x that of a normal man. Even in that sauna scene he’s not eating way more dicks than the others

It would be funny to see Cap chow down a few dozen burgers. But I suppose sights like that don't make for heroic stuff in movies. He could also engage in a drinking competition with Thor. That's a big missed opportunity.

Most people don't even remember that

Do you think his diarrhea gets out with 4x the speed and intensity of a normal diarrhea?

Is his sperm extra potent? He should have boinked Peggy. Hell, they should have made him fuck that horny blonde secretary played by Natalie Dormer. God, she was such a semen demon in the movie.

Dormer was in the movie?

character relevant humour is not allowed.
only quips.
showing a funny scene of him eating and explaining his vice takes up too much time. A witty one liner is better

Based

>seeking verisimilitude
>in marvel movies
cmon op

Why didn't they pit him against Thor in a drinking competition?

>OP’s homosexuality is 4x that of a normal man
4*0 = 0

Having a whole pile of Shawarmas next to him in the Avengers scene would take up no time whatsoever. It's just ineptitude on the writers' part.

Why didn't we get any scenes of women sucking and fucking cap? The man is fucking world famous, rocking body (no homo) and hasn't busted in about 40 years. You expect me to believe he wasn't raw dogging these "liberated" girls, filling them with super soldier sperm?

>eating like a walrus
What? Is the walrus the "hungry-hungry-hippo" of the animal kingdom?

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I wonder what his farts would smell like after a shawarma binge haha i bet it would be really stinky haha

everybody is gay to some extent

WW2 ended 74 years ago.
He's a 90 year old incel.

Woah, he's just like me...!

Underrated

coo coo ca choo

I am the eggman, motherfucker

wasn't there a scene in the first movie with him complaining about not being able to get drunk anymore because of his metabolism?

actually that would be the hippo

Captain America is not a slut!

why don’t we ever see any of the female characters taking a shit?

This is what faggots want you to believe.

Yep, I'd love to see him against Thor in a binge drinking match.

Was The First Avenger the last MCU movie to show gore? Near the end, some dude drops into a plane engine and turns into pink mist.

not gore u fag

Yes it was.

Why didn't we get an entire movie with Scarlett running around completely naked?

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Oh God, imagine squeezing a load of oil on your cock and then rubbing it against her ass

why werent more supersoldiers like cap made?

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Why didn't Tony give suits to Back Widow, Hawkeye and everyone else?

Ultimate Iron Man did in the comics, then Black Widow turned out to be a spy except now she was a spy with an Iron Man suit. So probably in case anyone decided to be a villain.

these mcu movie will never slow their rapid pace down to include a character building moment. it's all just, "pow boom quip," followed by more "pow boom quip."

PRrrrrt .... WOOOoof

>His metabolism is 4x that of a normal man
That means he only produces 1/4 the poop of a normal man. The rest is converted into energy.

based evans. i'm gonna miss him

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After Endgame will he ever need to work another day?

didn't stop people from watching captain marvel.

captain Marvel will be an apt replacement for captain America

Which is the bigger fag lie? Everyone is a bit gay or that AIDS isn’t a fag disease?