ITT: We predict JK Rowling's next stroke of genius

>What did Rowling say now to get the alt-incels up in arms?
Grindelwald and Dumbledore were secretly gay lovers.

Harry is actually a girl, but his father wanted a boy so he used the Dark Arts to turn him into a boy quickly after he was born.

>While the were in hogwarts, Ginny Weasly engaged in a lot of magically enhanced sex! It was not odd for Ginny to shirk Harry down and stuff him into her vagina and keep him there all day.

>professor mcgonigall had a hysterectomy at age 20 after developing cervical cancer

The restricted section of the library had wizard porn in it

Ginny is a trap and traps are gay so harry is gay

BASED THREAD BASED THREAD BASED THREAD
BASED THREAD ALERT EVERYONE THESE ARE GOING TO GET ME SO MANY UPVOTES ON REDDIT WHEN I REPOST THEM AHAHAHHA
saged.

that one actually sound like something she would tweet now, and also, something that would totally be in the harry potter world.

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The Marauders were all furries

>j.k rowling is slowly falling into obscurity
>the subhuman monkey brained memelord reddit tourists from Yea Forums start memeing her
>now she has someone to blame per usual as a stepping stone into relevancy again
I hope death will come swiftly to you absolute morons

Sneed

harry was actually a closeted homosexual white male who demonized and raped strong beautiful black women (dementors).

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There is a sorting hat that sorts you by gender. There are infinite genders.

Based

To be fair gay people ARE pretty gross

Yeah because shit threads are the only thing keeping her in the public's eye. Retard.

She already her stroke her genius when she realized that she could virtue signal to retain relevancy instead of creating something new but still shallow and pedantic related to her universe. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"

The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

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An aging neoliberal single mother with an inflated sense of self-importance
using twitter to cope with her increasing irrelevance. The sort of woman who hasn't seriously thought about any of
her opinions, but feels the need to push them on to others and condescend to anybody who might think differently.

She is an archetype. Neither insightful nor funny nor controversial. She is a consummate mediocrity basking in the
praise of similar mediocrities the world over who have projected their own aspirations on to her, satisfied that
somebody like them is a billionaire. Her Christianity is an accessory. She takes everything that she's been taught
by public school and daytime television and fashions a god out of it.

She conceives of public affairs in the nebulous terms of "love" and "hate". The fact that an action might fall
outside of either of these two categories, or that something she dems "hateful" might in fact be the wiser choice
has not occurred to her. Despite this, she is shockingly easy to bait into a bitter, spiteful rage. Furthermore,
her generosity extends only as far as her personal comfort. At the end of the day, it's little more than virtue
signalling and if social opinion undergoes some vast sweeping change thn she'll fall in line.

In many ways, she's already missed the boat. Her brand of comfortable feminism has already fallen out of style. She
just doesn't know it yet. The second wave man-hating sexual phobia that sees rape everywhere. Its frigidity is
evident in her writing. Then the bizarre merger with proud slut queer positivity. The post-hoc declarations of
characters' sexual proclivities. The rationalization of racial retconning. It's like she discovered a Harry Potter
fan tumblr, followed a couple links, and incorporated whatever she saw, resulting in an incoherent schizophrenic
worldview. That's probably exactly what happened.

Her name is fucking Joanne. Need I say more?

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