OK, Aladdin, can I call ya Al'? You got three wishes. Go

I just want a good woman who genuinely loves me god dammit

Attached: 1519689417770.png (507x540, 64K)

I can't kill people, can't bring people back from the dead and I can't make anyone fall in love. And no wishing for more wishes.

Done. However, the only way you could have that much wealth is if you were the world so i turned you into the world's consciousness. enjoy being a rock

Can't kill people, nice try tho

Y'all niggas got issues

Done, I can bring the goth gf to you but you gotta woo her tho chief, don't worry I can help

Done, I've turned you into the Voyager probe and stuck a ten inch dong on it

I can't work miracles user

1. I wish to be the the most powerful sorcerer in
in the universe.
2. I wish abu can speak.
3: I wish for you to die genie.

>3: I wish for you to die genie.

Hey why you white folks so mean

Attached: genie.jpg (1647x1072, 178K)

I wish for crabs legs
I wish for popcorn
I wish to be let into a no-singles screen

1. Pokemon are real
2. Dragon Ball Z are real
3. 3 more wishes :^)

You got it, boss

Attached: genierobert.jpg (1647x1072, 186K)

I want my penis to be 5 inches larger and 3 thicker than it is to have a normal human look and make it in a way that it wont cause me any health or functional problems of any type
I will wait your response before telling you me next 2 wishes

Turn all girls and women into traps with feminine penises

Thank you Genie

Ahh, the old dong elonger? No problem chief, done. How's it feel?

Good.
Now I want my balls to be cut off
I also want tits

why were they stupid enough to paint him blue?

I didn't wish to be turned into a Voyager probe, you dummy. That's your illogical brain spinning shit that I didn't say. You're a women, genie. A women. Good day, ma'am.

Done and done. I saved some time and turned you into successful comic Hannah Gadsby. That was wishes 2 and 3, have a good life!

Attached: aladdin-genie-will-smith-1200x526.jpg (1200x526, 49K)

>Hey why you white folks so mean

Its mercy, give him back his freedom and he has no powers whats so ever. He just a guy who is out of time.

Better to burn out than fade away.

Shh, probes can't talk. Enjoy space bro

1. I want a Mortgage
2. I want a job that pays for it
3. Here, I wish for your freedom, pal

Attached: flat,550x550,075,f.u10.jpg (393x550, 30K)

Thanks man, I appreciate it! I had to make you jewish though to fulfill the first two wishes, hope that ain't a problem?

FUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Attached: flat,550x550,075,f.jpg (543x550, 23K)

1. infinite money
2. no matter what i eat i still maintain a perfect physique
3. the genie stays trapped in the lamp forever

WORN OUT FACES

Attached: 1550719471702.png (250x247, 68K)

>3. the genie stays trapped in the lamp forever
You evil fuck i bet youre jewish

Dude, be careful what you wish, the genie is gonna turn you into a cave filled with gold. I should know, because he turned me into a Voyager probe and sent me floating through space with a ten inch rotting penis attached to my windshield :-(

How big is your penis tho

Well, apparently space probes can't talk, so I can't answer your question in regards to my dick size. This conversation is just a figment of your imagination.

1. Make me a sandwich
2. Pizza Hut in the garage
3. numbers...Numbers..NUMBERS!!!

Attached: huuuug.jpg (500x500, 54K)

1 make wakanda real
2 make whitoids pay reparations
3 black people were never slaves

OK, you're a sandwich.

Sandwiches can't talk, sorry man about the other wishes.

Done, nothing has changed.

Done, you're an algorithm on the stock market able to process infinite money. I'm already trapped in my lamp, waste of a wish dude

>I can't kill people, can't bring people back from the dead and I can't make anyone fall in love. And no wishing for more wishes.

so I can wish for unlimited power? For immortality? For 12 inches?

Done, I turned you into an unlimited battery for a 12" iPad that will never die. No need to thank me

damned monkey paw

i'm an algorithm with a perfect physique?

Guys! Do NOT wish for anything!

This genie is evil.

Pure evil.

There's a loop hole to everything you wish for. The only way to successfully get your wish is to get Jewish lawyers involved. Even after that, you still wouldn't get your three wishes. No. More like half a wish once the Jews that their compensation.

>I wish for Genie to make my next 2 wishes in the best of my interest and exactly how I am imagining them

easy

>can I call y'all?

>you suddenly lack imagination and do not feel like wishing for anything.

I wish for every post of mine to become dubs

Attached: happy bateman.jpg (380x300, 15K)

Genie since i can't kill you, i wish everyone had erectile dysfunction except me

Attached: 1551202670392.gif (248x202, 675K)

*has

>Can't kill people, nice try tho
Genies aren't people though.

fuck

unlimited wealth
infinite life
infinite good health as my 21yr old self

>no wishing for more wishes
i wish i could

That's geniecist.

1. Return to when i was 14 years old but keep all my memories up until that point

2. Full mental and physical control of every female alive and yet to be born

I.e if i want Amber Heard to be my gf i can just think it and it'll happen, and i can just think her breasts to be a cup size bigger it'll happen overnight. And before Genie thinks he's clever, i'm not asking for her to fall in love, just want me in lust

3. Win the next big lottery jackpot

>unlimited wealth
Wouldn't that just collapse every economic system?

naa. Unlimited can just be never ending. Say I have 1 billion in the bank. I spend a million and I earn a million. So i'm back to a billion

>Ability to change my or other people's shape any way I want simply by watching a picture or imagining it, others won't notice it happening
>Ability to remember everything I read, see or hear, retroactively
>Enough money to live comfortably without working for the rest of my life, but no so much that it's too easy to spend it

>Ability to remember everything I read, see or hear, retroactively

your brain is now fried, enjoy the life of a vegetable.

There's already people who can do that irl and they're not vegetables.

but clearly your brain just like mine is not wired that way to handle the information.

That's not how it works.

that's literally how it works

thats hot

wtf i love the genie now

>I wish for more confidence
>I wish for more patience
>But most of all I wish for my little brother to come back to life

I do think we store every moment of our lives in our brain anyway. It's just our brain wouldn't cope if we remember everything all the time. That's how we'd suddenly remember a random day from our childhoods where nothing special happened at 3am at night.

So our brains wouldn't fry, just have a better method of accessing the right info when we need it. Bit like in the film Limitless

>Wishes for the Nazis to win WW2.
>Still asks for dollars.
Brainlet?

I want to become a magical girl

I wish moot came back and had immortality and had to admin 4chinz forever 24/7

1) I want a white genie.

Alright, everyone is Muslim and follows the rules of the Quran perfectly and this till the end of time. There you have a an islamic gommunist utopia where there are no incels, corporate fuckery or other bullshit of the modern day.

1. Omnipotence.
2. Every copy of Disney Star Wars is destroyed (just to be sure).
3. You are free gennie but one conditiuon: you can't stop me and grant anyones wishes anymore.

Attached: d8a1df515a673e791ce4a8743fc56216.jpg (700x995, 87K)

Big Dick. Bigger Dick. Biggest Dick.

1: Morrigan was real (if impossible for whatever dumb reason, a perfect VR chamber)
2: Untaxed billion dollars
3: Flight without having to use my own energy

Attached: 1431713658459.png (662x632, 361K)

...that's two conditions user

It's ultimate pleb filter. If someone wish for money or something sexual related then he is a fucking subhuman with terrible lack of imagination.

Attached: 26908103_1973718712879675_6988276034008836611_n.jpg (960x720, 141K)

>get 3 pefect wishes then genie is gone forever
>he wouldn't wish for the hottest woman and the most money he could get because once the genie is gone, you're on your own
this test is also a brainlet filter

I wish the Joker has an occasion to have his 3 wishes. Movie about this would be fucking kino.
youtube.com/watch?v=3OyrX11cMkE

1. Career as a successful writer
2. Hot Indian girlfriend
3. In a good hardcore punk band

a watch to stop time and even rewind it

I wish the world would explode

I wish I were dead.

You can have the other two.

Attached: where-is.gif (414x212, 10K)

>Hot Indian girlfriend

Attached: 1552077486316.gif (320x180, 1.5M)