Why

Reminds me of when the woman behind that new MLP cartoon tweeted this out.

The difference is that she was fucking joking, while JK Rowling is not.

A kid's cartoon about cartoon pastel ponies has more logical and consistent world-building than JK's Harry Potter series. That is fucking sad.

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this a better solution, why adopt toilets?

and if you are going to adopt toilets, why not install those Japanese ones with the fancy settings and seat warmers

"NO!"

>new
its been 9 years user.

>Theory exists that hogwarts was built around 900AD
>Chamber Pots have existed since around 600BC
>A waste disposal system existed 1500 years prior but wizards are so retarded they just shit themselves
gg rowling, i bet that's how she relieved herself well into her 40s

The true author shows through when publishers and editors aren't down your throat. Rowling is a hack that had a good story.

If you can just vanish the shit, what's the point in taking the time to find a chamber to squat over? I fail to see anything wrong with this.

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Versailles was a literal shithole in the 17th Century. Visitors just shat where they stood or behind curtains or pillars. I imagine Hogwarts was the same.

Remember when she REEE'd about Britain taking in "refugees"? Then it was found out she has multiple huge mansions which just sit empty and she deflected attempts at housing said "refugees" at her properties?

If you can just vanish the shit which is a biological matter, why can't you just vanish Voldemort.
Fucking wizards are retarded.

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because they don't know where the turd goes, it can be appear right in front of you or maybe in the face of Dumbledore

It's a quick tweet. They obviously weren't in the middle of conversation or in class and shat. They went around the corner or behind a tree and did it there.

>Accio Hermione's poop!
God damn, Snape had zero chill.

She looks qt

In other news, Rowling declared that everyone's name was Pajeet.

Wtf I thought plumbing has already existed before the 18th century

It would be fine to say new cartoon to differentiate it from the old one
But the way he said "that new MLP cartoon" is just hilarious, like he's completely unaware of bronies

Absolutely not. In fact, all of the current castle as shown in the movies (and probably the books) was constructed hundreds of years after the initial construction. Castles as you imagine them didn't even exist when Hogwarts was built, never mind the 18th century Gothic Renewal design the movies went with.

Why not cast a spell to make your shit or pee disappear while it's still inside of you. Why shit it out in the first place.

DESIGNATED

Cause if you aren't 100% accurate you're gonna teleport some of your stomach with it and die instantly

lel

Do you think this happens when people apparate?

well you would only know that if you'd studied beyond public school history

It's "new" as in "it was made this decade", as opposed to any earlier incarnations of Hasbro's MLP brand, which are all 20 to 35 years old at this point.

India hates toilet witches though

>Harry Potter visits an ancient wizard, said to have lived since the 18th century
>the meeting goes well, Harry learns some cool spells or whatever
>"Um, Mr. Grand Wizard, sorry to interrupt, but where are your facilities"
>"My what?"
>"Your restroom"
>"I rest in the living room and the bedroom lad"
>"No, your toilet"
>"My what?"
>"I... need to relieve myself. I need to... defecate"
>"Oh, hahaha, dear lad, this is an old fashioned household. Just take a squat where you like."
>"That's disgusting!"
>"Here, lad, I'll show you how it's done. Got a bit of magic brewing in me as well I do. Been eating me magic beans."
>The ancient wizard exposes his wrinkly buttocks. Wispy white hairs dangle from his anus.
>With a gargantuan grunt, a large log escapes his nether regions unbroken
>"Now, what was the spell again? Engorgio!"
>the turd grows in size
>"Accio! Oh, no no no..."
>"Oh, here's a good one, lad! Locomotor!"
>the fecal matter becomes an animated object
>"Now we're getting somewhere. Now, Mr. Brown, why don't you stretch your legs?"
>the turd walks off

>>the turd grows in size

jej

Why not just vanish it from your innards and skip the relieving yourself part?

That's irresponsible as fuck.

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because she enjoys fucking with people, apparently

There was some old sci-fi book where the secret to immortality ended up having to do with the way their teleporter pods worked. The person would teleport to one pod, and all the bad shit within their body would teleport to a separate pod as a cloud of disease and filth.

Anyone know the title of this?

There was probably another entrance but it seems so. Doesn't mean the bathroom was always a bathroom though... although it would seem odd that the people who built the bathroom didn't notice the hole so you could be right. JKR is a hack anyway and I say this as an HP fan. The bitch is constantly adding some stupid shit just to appeal to SJWs and mentally ill people

>why don't you stretch your legs?

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this gave me a good chuckle

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Why are people suddenly shitting on her for being revisionist when she’s been doing this shit for years? Did she say anything recently?

>suddenly
you know full well people have been getting angry over her "changes" for years, Mr. Satan

samefag

How many times do we have to teach you this lesson?

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Because regardless of "convenience", humans have had a natural revulsion to shitting in their pants since literally before recorded history.
Even before the invention of Toilet-precursors like Chamber Pots humans still used outhouses and other facilities to separate themselves from their shit. From the literal beginning of time distancing yourself from the human waste you produce has been a hallmark of civilization. It's one of the primary tangible things that separates that which is human from that which is animal. That means that even if you COULD magic your turds away after shitting in your pants, most people wouldn't do it, wizard or otherwise. That's something humans, and by proxy magicians. naturally find disgusting, humiliating and uncivilized, regardless of if it's slightly more convenient than dropping a deuce in a toilet or outhouse.

For wizards to never utilize these methods but instead only use magic would require literally every wizard to learn this spell, without exception, and learn it by the time they are out of diapers.
It also brings up logistics as to whether or not your clothes are soiled with feces in the process even if the waste itself is removed. Does the spell also sanitize you? Does it negate the smell? What if you are in public? Do elderly wizards just start groaning in the middle of conversations while they grind out a turd, sitting in a coffee shop? What if you are low on Mana/whatever the HP equivalent is? Do you just shit your pants and stew in it till you can take a shower?

It's a stupid decision as far as world-building goes. It's a needlessly complicated alternative with no real benefits over the simpler solution. The logical solution would just be to use a fucking toilet.

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This.

The much more logical solution, if Rowling wanted to utilize world-building, would be Wizards coming up with a spell that causes your body to be able to go for long periods of time without needing food, water, or to produce waste.
Maybe even specify that Wizard scholars invented the spell so they could spend lengthy amounts of time, potentially days at a time, immersed in study and never having to be distracted/interrupted by the human trivialities of needing to eat or use a toilet.

There. I just created some actual lore related to literal wizard shit in 20 fucking seconds, and it's STILL better than what Rowling came up with.

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How would the Teleportation Device be able to identify the difference between the person's biological matter and the biological matter that makes up the unhealthy stuff they want to expel?

>How would the Teleportation Device be able to identify the difference between the person's biological matter and the biological matter that makes up the unhealthy stuff they want to expel?
Presumably, if you have a technology advanced enough to read all the electrical pulses in your brain and recreate them perfectly, you will also have a technology advanced enough to determine which parts are okay and which parts need to be separated out.

If only Rowling had "vanished" the turd she herself shat out. Alas, it was left to fester and become the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody, just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

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>Why are people suddenly shitting on her for being revisionist

They're not. People have been shitting on her for her SJW revisionism for literal years.
The difference is that people became numb to that after a while, but the whole "Wizards shit in their pants!"-commentary was so objectively fucking retarded that it warranted talking about her again.
There's also the fact that while her claiming shit like "Hagrid is transgender!" is also objectively stupid and wothery of mockery, it inevitably becomes something stupid SJW's can defend with "OMG ur being transphobic!" to shut-down criticism. However, they cannot do the same with wizards shitting their pants being criticized. Not unless Liberals are now embracing pants-shitting as a "lifestyle choice" now.

based

>For wizards to never utilize these methods but instead only use magic would require literally every wizard to learn this spell, without exception, and learn it by the time they are out of diapers.
>out of diapers
who said anything about being out of diapers?
just shit in your diaper, vanish the whole thing away and conjure yourself a new diaper right in place

This guy gets it

Ancient Minoans had plumbing and running water in 1500 BCE. Rowling's wizards are just retarded.

Quality fucking post, user

You are literally retarded

>vanished
Except that the younger wizards and witches were not good at that (or were just little rascal pranksters when it came to older teens) and mostly turned their shit/pee invisible or made their turds explode.
That's why they adopted muggle plumbing even though muh muggles are shit (pun intended)
That didn't go well at first. There was the Living Toilet Paper War 2 years after they first introduced muggle plumbing. The spell to get rid of the toilet paper was so experimental that it produced an army of anthropomorphic poo eating living toilet paper zombies.
Then there was the Flushing Portal incident 5 years later. Many wizards lost their lives when that happened.

What about ancient minotaurs?

HI jk

They shat on the floor of their labyrinthe. That's the real reson people wouldn't go in there to search for treasure.

Shieeeet

Yeah I'm thinking he's based

I WANT PICTURES, POTTER! PICTURES OF THAT MENACE VOLDEMORT!

Out of all the retcons this isn't even the worst. In Versailles they didn't have any toilets, so royalty would just shit wherever in the giant palace, then have someone else clean it up afaik. So it parellels what happened in the real world. It's stupid to state it though because some things don't need to be known and over explaining ruins them.

Based dullest franchise poster

Because JK realizes nothing she'll ever do will ever top Harry Potter, so she keeps dragging it up. It's the same with Lucas and Star Wars. It's clear he wanted to do other things, but when he tried, they just never garnered the same attention, so he went back and dug up Star Wars and tried to add all this stuff to it, and people hated the additions. People like JK and Lucas should just be happy that they made one massively successful thing. A one-hit wonder beats a no-hit nobody.

She made some new comments that Dumbledore liked to FUCK HARD and then it became a meme on twitter so it has a had a resurgence in popularity.

I'd still fuck her

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i see the Bogdanoff are casting their spell on her

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based

Minotaurs weren't a thing until Mycenaean Greece, not Minoan Greece.

if wizards didnt need to eat, rowling couldnt write about chocolate frogs, beans, beer and feasts, which is what 90 % of the first books are about.

for me Yea Forums is just sifting for days through porn and racism to find original jokes like this one

They had movable stools and groomers of the stool. They didn't literally shit on the floor or in front of everyone.
Except for that weird King who had porphyria and was peeing blue.

Good old King George had porphyria too.

It's good to be king

>wizards and witches are literally on par with the poorfuck chinese mainlanders

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Based

huh who said this was the dullest franchise

POO IN FLOO

kek

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Fun fact: A lot of these ridiculous retcons and trivia additions to the lore were completely accidental.

collegehumor.com/post/7054422/how-i-accidentally-got-published-in-a-harry-potter-book

A few years ago College Humor did an april fools prank where they photoshopped a bunch of Rowling tweets to reveal a bunch of ridiculous details about the series, the most infamous one being about the Hufflepuff group masturbation sessions. Well a few of these ended up getting printed into "Pottermore trivia sections" in reprints of the actual books, as well as being actually tweeted out by the official twitter account, like in the OP.

literally an episode of rick and morty

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I cant turn my shit invisible so the next best thing is to let it out on her

This

She's a big girl

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put me in screencap

kek I didn't pick up on that.

Kek

There were MANY sci-fi books with this idea.
I can remember it being a thing in The Galactic Spy, a french sci-fi novel of the 50s/60s. They also use the teleporter to change the appearance/physical body of people except for their brains so they could go undercover.

>be in defense against the dark arts class
>qt mudblood next me is squirming in her seat
>gets up, squats on the floor and leaves a perfect coil on the ground.
>pulls out wand
>pull mine out first, 'poopus erasus!'
>poop disappears
>thanks user!
>pop magical boy boner as i think about smelling the poop i just transported to a jar back in my dorm.

unironically more in tone with the hp universe than any of the prequels

>Mundungus Fletcher
>Dung Fetcher
Bravo Rowling

But that one literally makes sense. They're horses, why would they shit anywhere but on the ground?

Good lead-in,

kek

I actually read
>watched the evidence.
still makes sense as everything else in that SJW-nazi shitverse of hers.

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very good

Why not just vanish the shit or urine while it's still inside you, rather than soil something first?

>Harry Potter sets up all this massive lore
>JK does nothing with it and leaves you fucking blue balled
Then they make Fantastic Beasts to try and appeal to the Dr. Who crowd and again do fucking nothing with the idea. Harry Potter is the best depiction of fantasy and magic set in the modern day with nothing backing it up. They never leave Hogwarts nor mention the other schools aside from passing. In fact, Hogwarts and London seems like the only placing having a problem with Voldemort.
Fuck. It's just so poorly written.

youtu.be/D1RMITgiPyk

>Harry Potter is the best depiction of fantasy and magic set in the modern day
It REALLY isn´t.

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>stretch your legs

fuck

Based

>stretch your legs
lel

/r/Yea Forums will love this thanks

"No!"

i've already made the post
This is why i love TV, it's essentially reddit. We make great thread, funny combos, and call out the racists pol and trump idiots like the morons they are
for me it's
>tv
>int
>lgbt

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>Harry Potter is the best depiction of fantasy and magic set in the modern day
Even the cucks at White Wolf did a better job, and they're retarded.

Thanks for the upvote.

Let's make it happen lads.

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doesn't it say that wizardfuckers didn't adopt it until eighteenth century. not that normalniggas invented it then. pretty sure that even aztecs had somekind of toilet system

>>With a gargantuan grunt, a large log escapes his nether regions unbroken
better writing than in the actual books

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>I posted that shitty list again that claims atlas shrugged is a masterpiece and ulysses is garbage
>and then samefagged my respose with "based" to bump the thread

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Why would we? Our shit is good for the earth too. Funnily enough, they used toilets in season one.

High level slytherin graduates oversaw the construction of that bathroom to conceal the chamber

Imagine being that muggle born kid in the 1800s who get introduced to the magic world, just to see people shit themselves all over the place.

Goddam thats keklez

Because humans are not horses.

Little Emma Watson urinating on herself? Tiny soaked panties? That's hot.

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He'll revive through one of his horcruxes.

good post

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Implying eating is related to defecation.

I just realized something about the "likes" I should've noticed a long time ago. If a controversial youtube video got the same amount of attention as that shitty tweet it would look like 75k likes and 75k dislikes (something like that).
Meanwhile on twitter you only see the positivity in the stats on controversial takes meaning that twitter essentially rewards crazy people to say crazy things without them being notified how fucking crazy their ideas are and meanwhile they can just block all the "trolls". Twitter is so bad, it rewards crazy people.

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