HE'S GONNA TAKE YOU BACK TO THE PAST

It sucks so bad it sucks. Its so fucking sucks it fucks!

HE'D RATHER KILL
HIS FUCKING CHANNEL
WITH A BUNCH OF FAT FUCKS

HE'D RATHER LET RYAN SCHOTT
FUCK HIS WIFE IN THE REAR
HE'D RATHER EAT THE ROTTEN ASSHOLE
OF A FAT FUCK AND DOWN IT WITH BEER

Takes a dump in a coffee can, plays some coffee games in a coffee can, this game sucks his coffee balls, oh no, he's gay

HE'D RATHER PLANT
A GUMMI BEAR
IN SOME SOIL OF 8 OR 9 pH

ten inches

Whoa

HE'S THE ANGRIEST FARMER YOU'VE EVER HEARD
HE'S THE ANGRY SEED NERD
HE'S THE ANGRY SUCK AND FUCK NERD
HE'S THE ANGRY
SNEED
NERD

Cinemassacre’s dead. Channel sucks like never before

For me, it's the Atari 5200 episode.

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this

Seaman was the last genuinely good episode. James is barely even involved in the episodes anymore, outside of starring in them.

Early on the college gimmick still worked, now it doesn't, he's too old and bald and with a dudebro tattoo.

HES GONNA SNEED YOU BACK TO THE CHUCK
TO WATCH YOU FUCK HIS WIFE IN THE BUTT

FRED FUCHS

He doesn’t write or edit any of the AVGN episodes anymore and it shows. The humor is embarrassing. James just shows up and reads the script and collects the money. The channel’s long gone, never coming back

Imagine building a world famous brand for a decade and then selling it to these greasy losers because you're too pussy-whipped to say no to your wife.

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How big is Jame's basement where he can fit the AVGN room, and a "video store"?

He must have had to rebuild his house so his new crew can fit through the doors.

why is it so slow? WHY IS IT SO ASS?

*montage of him trying out different games and none of them respond*
"this controller is a piece of shit"
I always lose it at that one.

The channel gets more monthly views than every other retro gaming channel combined.

Purely coasting on the goodwill from when the channel was good.

Even if true, it gets more view than every other retro game channel combined.

What's your point?

¿ʇi ʇǝפ

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Just that you said the channel is “long gone”. I’m just trying to make the point that considering it is the most popular retro game channel on YouTube, it’s far from gone. I’m not even discussing quality, only that they are very much still here.

No! I don't get!

I'm pretty sure he still writes it, he just has nothing to actually say about the games so he forces it. There was an episode a while back where he said "just look at all these games, I'm not going to run out", but he did. He's done with NES which were the interesting bad games and now he's doing playstation 2 stuff

TOTAL FUCKING GAR-BITCH

I like the rental movie review episodes unironically

Who writes the AVGN episodes now, I wish James would go back to doing board james and other projects he actually enjoys

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Pics?

what the fuck, who are all these assholes

t. haven't watched avgn in ten years

HED RATHER EAT
THE GUCCI LOAFERS
OF A CITY SLICKER AND DOWN IT WITH SEED

I don't know how a 4/10 manages to swing an 8/10

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yes you have you liar

That's not his girlfriend anymore

this + IT SUCKS MONKEY BUTTS LIKE ALL THE FUCKING REST

old (2007-2010) avgn episodes are comfy as shit and nobody can change that

It's up

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Honest question,Is this what whites consider big?

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there's something vaguely off about seeing avgn in anything more than 480p

>fortnite
now there's a nostalgic game. 'tis the game of my youth! a grand time.

they must. they keep hiring black guys with 7 inches and calling it 'monster' and 'dongzilla'

Anyone above 80 iq

Thats too big. For most women he probably cant go balls deep

Imagine being Mike in that scene and having to be all like "damn, you guys, you're so much fun to be around, all dressed up in your holiday outfits and horrific whale like bodies. I would totally be here rather than anywhere else right now, both my character and the real me." when all he really wants to do is impale another 16 year old in his dressing room.
Like seriously imagine having to be Mike and not only sit on that sofa while they pose their disgusting bodies for the camera next to you, the tortured clothes barely concealing their stretchmarks and leathery skin, and just sit there, scene after scene, hour after hour, while they try and force all their generous frames into the shot.
Not only having to tolerate their monstrous fucking visage but their haughty attitude as each of them keeps shouting MAN THIS IS GOING TO BE GREAT and WOW, IS THIS COOL OR WHAT?? because they're not the ones who have to sit there and watch their goblin features you didn't even know existed before the day your friend sold your life's work.
You've been fucking nothing but a healthy diet of blondes and supermodels and later alleged rape victims for your ENTIRE CAREER coming straight out of the boonies.
You've never even seen anything this fucking disgusting before, and now you swear you can taste the sweat that's breaking out on their engorged stomachs as they desperately try not to collapse into a black hole, smugly assured that you are enjoying the opportunity to get paid to sit there and be part of THEIR (for that is what they call it now) brand, the brand you've poured your blood sweat and passion into for a decade.
And then the director calls for another take, and you know you could kill every single person in this room before the police could come and put you down, but you sit there and endure, because you're fucking Mike. You're not going to hurt your friend's tanked career even more over this. Just bear it. Fiddle with the Santa hat and bear it.

>not 'you're motherfucking mike matei'

I would totally make love with the pink hat qt

Because he hhas a huge dick. Imagine being the girl. She texts back and forth with Mike a few times. They get comfortable then he inevitably sends her a dick pic. She see's he is legitimately hung with a monster cock. Its so big that she will MOVE ACROSS THE COUNTRY to get that massive tool.

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I mean that's a funny story and all but they clearly just lazily shot this in an afternoon. Probably linear in camera so all they have to do is upload.
youtube.com/watch?v=DkGStsUVl-A

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>a fuckin’ chicken mask!
Still the funniest work he’s done.

For me, it's pic related

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