Here's your receipt user, hope you have a nice day

Welcome to kinoplex, what can I getchya... Who? Robert? You mean that black guy working here before me? Nah, sorry dude, he musta quit or somethin'...

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Singles Subcharge. LEARN TO READ.

But I'm a lady Robert how could you!?

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fuck you, you smug piece of shit. bring back robert right now.

White robert's kinoplex seems like a shithole it's way too brighy compared to robert's tasteful kino

Goodness Robert, you're going to have to go to sensitivity training in the dilation stations.

I... I'm sorry, user... They found out I was sneaking you into no-singles screenings and they demoted me to the popcorn mines. I don't think there's any coming back from this one. It's been nice, friend.

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Real Robert is also wearing a tie and a vest over his well ironed shirt, not like that unbuttoned blue polo wearing fake Robert

>no mandatory tip
This might be a photoshop

Robert no I'm sorry! I-I'll go get gf right now to prove that they were wrong.

Robert, my old friend, even Captain Kirk got out of the mines in Star Trek V

>60 oz drink

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Your kind words gave me the push I needed to get myself out of there. Thank you, user! Now I'm the owner of the kinoplex. And I say, no more no singles policy!

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Robert died years ago. I don't know who this is.

I remembered they posted Robert IG account
We should tell the actor this

fuck off robert you stupid fucking nigger

I bet Jules takes Robert's BBC daily.

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Robert is pure you heathen

thanks robert, your a good friend

>I wasn’t gonna pay for popcorn anyway, not theft and not a lost sale!!1

He's actually in love with Lane but he's too much of an autist to talk to her so Robert gives him some pickup advice.

what the fuck, robert? he's not even fully white - he's part irish >:(

>implying one can receive the true death in the kinoplex

do you have any idea where you are?

What would a show starring these three be like?

>no penis inspection charges

I knew I should have signed up for the Global Penis Entry program.

How much more for the cute boy on the left?
Could I get some of that warm popcorn butter flavored lube too? I want to drizzle it on his smooth buns.

Thats gay user!

P-please stop... S-sorry sir... just take your ticket and go...

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How the fuck did you know I was part potatonigger?

>part potato
>wasn't charged white male tax
robert knew. who knows how he learns these things. the man runs a tight ship.

Jules, your terminal isn’t even active right now. I’m pretty sure you just held my ticket under a laser pointer and made a beeping sound with your mouth.

Oh hi Jules, didn't see your name before when you were hiding behind your co-worker.

Wanna come watch the movie with me? I bought an extra ticket for you.

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Robert deserves his own movie and a sequel

>those two women dressed in the exact same outfit on the left
>the guy pissing on the floor to the right
What the fuck is going on in this Kinoplex?

Robert would never cheat on his beautiful black wife, let alone with a wh*te woman

What the fuck is a subcharge? Did retarded faggot OP by chance mean SURCHARGE?

don't you have daily flash mobs for black justice populated entirely by white women from twitter and instagram?

>no meditation room for penis introspection

>risking an appropriating eastern culture charge
nice try, bub. i do my penis introspection in the showers with the catholics.

I know I'm holding up the line, but I am having trouble interpreting this map of the kinoplex without a north-south orientation.

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>le kino nigger
cringe

i'll have some chicken wings you dirty nigger

Robert threads are the only good threads on Yea Forums

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Robert, could I get Lane’s number? She’s my type

Based

Now Lane I can get in to!

Formally milhouse threads

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*sigh* the only reason i even go to the kinplex anymore is to submit to pegging by a somalian immigrant woman. i don't even enjoy the flicks all that much.

What is this thread

t. capeshitter

Based

What am I supposed to do with my anvil?

>map doesn't mark racial boundaries
u a dead white boy

Lurk more newfag.

>Ladies and gentlemen, I'm sorry to interrupt your kino, but I'm afraid we've had some technical difficulties with the designated shooter. All backup shooters, please see the manager at the concession stand. Thank you, and back to the film.

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Looks like this guy is dicking around behind the counter no one uses.

Very unprofessional. I’m calling security.

How are you supposed to get your falcon to the aviary if there's a fence? Do you just give it to the person at the register before you get your penis inspection?

They should all be named Robert.

This is why I always sneak in some crab legs when I go to the kinoplex.

>head to the theatre one Saturday night
>Place is full of teenagers out on dates
>I'm all alone but this month they are waiving the no-singles policy so I've been trying to see a movie every week
>Buy my ticket and head into the concessions stand
>Just ask for a small soda pop because I am secretly sneaking in some candies
>I know it's wrong but I can't help it, I can't afford movie tickets and snacks and a drink
>Robert eyes me up as I decline any popcorn or a larger drink
>"user, this movie you're seeing is perfect with a large soda and a big bucket of popcorn. Are you sure you don't want any?"
>I nervously grasp the Skittles in my coat pocket and start to sweat. Robert eyes me up and down and reaches for his official Theatre Glock, mandatory for all theatre workers
>I back up slowly, he tells me to stop
>I can't stop, I grip the Skittles so hard the bag tears and they start spilling out of my pocket
>Robert draws his firearm and takes aim
>DROP. THE. CANDY. user. he yells
>Tears fill my eyes, why is this happening to me
>I turn to run when I hear him fire
>The bullet rips through my leg, the pain is unbearable
>I fall down and try to crawl towards the theatre but Robert puts his boot on my head
>"It didn't have to be like this, why did you do it another?" He began me as I begin to pass out from blood loss
>"I... Just... Wanted... To watch a movie and eat snacks without paying $75"
>The theatre cops have arrived by now and cuff me. Robert looks at me with sadness and disgust, tells me that I never should have tried to sneak in outside food into his theatre
>Sent down for a 2 month sentence in the popcorn mines

It’s sub for subhuman charge which is what you are

I’m a potato and AI programmes always tells me I’m mostly Hispanic and Asian
At least I don’t get charged extra at the so-called Kinoplex

user. This is a mao of a single screen. Not the whole kinoplex. You don't beed a north south orientation. Besides, you know you just belong in the singles section.

ROBERT NO!

Robert you charged me an extra 22 bucks for being a neet. That's not true, I'm enrolled at the local community college for anthropology. Please take that item off my bill

> He forgot the local plastic straw and soda taxes.

Excuse me, how much is your Falconing fee?

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Absolutely based

Why aren't there any kinos about working at the kinoplex?

This is a quality thread.

I want to speak to a manager. I won't have some nigger touching my food.

>studying at a community college
>studying anthropology
No user. I think it belongs.

You think you're above the law, Sir? Into the Popcornmines you go.

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>that will be a $14.88 charge for racism and all racism related activities while within the kinoplex, your card has already been charged

Robert threads are probably my favorite part of Yea Forums.

Trayvon Martin, is that you?

I still can't tell if crab legs is a meme or real

>want to see Captain Marvel but its no-singles night
>know for a fact security has my picture
>come up with a devilish plan
>head to me local Walmart
>pick up a high powered assault rifle for $39.95(they had a special, for every massacure causing weapon you buy you get a full clip of armor piercing rounds free!)
>pick out a stylish black trenchcoat
>head into the kinoplex
>security assumes im the designated shooter and lets me pass
>Robert knows what im up to but shoots me a thumbs up
>I fire finger guns back at him
>head into the theater
>suddenly run into the actual designated shooter
>"AWKWAAAAAARD"
>sit down and watch Captain Marvel while he does his job, seems to only target interracial couples as I guffaw loudly
>go home and rate the movie 1/10 on imdb

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Robert, I'm terribly sorry for this, this cretin's outburst- Is this man bothering you?. Anyways, excuse me sir *cocks gun* I think you need to leave.

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>it's been days since the crab invasion of the popcorn mine
>the kinoplex manager ordered the collapse of the main entrance leaving us trapped. Robert was sent down for inspection that day.
>everyone but Robert and I is dead
>one of the fuckers clawed his leg
>have him put his arm around my neck for support as we limp toward a butter crevasse to hide in
>hear a few crab's echo behind us
>start walking faster
>"Sir."
>keep walking
>"Sir!"
>"What, Robert."
>can barely see what's in front of us
>"Can we stop for a quick word? You've been very generous so far but I must ask you for one more favor."
>keep walking
>"We gotta keep going, Rob. These things aren't far behind us."
>"Please, sir."
>"No."
>"NIGGA, THIS AIN'T NO WHITE MAN'S BURDEN SHIT. STOP!"
>can't keep him from saying what I think he will anymore
>"What is it?"
>looks down at his bloody leg
>"Sorry, I lost my composure..."
>"...with this leg here... I'm only slowing you down."
>"Robert, stop."
>can feel tears welling up
>"It's inevitable. Your sleeve isn't stopping the bleeding. I'm only giving them something to follow."
>hear crab screech in the distance
>"We have to fucking go."
>try to drag him but he won't budge
>"Come on!"
>hot tears flow over the butter on my face
>"I'M NOT FUCKING LEAVING YOU HERE. FUCK YOU!"
>see him reach for something in his vest
>it's a .44 magnum revolver, the most prized gun in the kinoplex
>there's only one bullet in the cylinder
>"No."
>"You've seen what these things do to people. Please, do this for me, user."
>"How do you know my name?"
>he smiles that familiar smile
>"I know a lot about you, sir. I knew you were a virgin before you got sent down here but I knew from the moment I saw you that you were a real kinoisseur. Pen and notepad in hand for taking kinotes during BvS? The rest of them don't get it like you do.
>takes out heavily used notepad
>"You appreciate the art... the beauty...take them..."
>"....Congratulations, sir. You're today's designated shooter."

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rate setup

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Based Robert willingly omitting the kinoplex shower fee

fucking beautiful.... kino/10

based

Damn it Jules, can't you get anything right?!?! Get off the pot and stop hanging around with your stoner friends!

just slide a subway footlong down your pants, if you need more than that during a movie you've got issues

good job, user

this thread feels like an extremely elaborate fever dream. i've seen them before but nothing to this extent

robert you gave me the half price tuesday prices on a monday? you're a goddamn saint I tell you what. when mom hears about this she'll have to believe that blackfrican americans are allowed to work these days.

Based Robert offering both Lane or Jules as your movie partner as to subvert the no-singles policy.

Robert I don't know how to say this but you've been extremely influential on me my during a trying time in my life as well. I Robert I~ will you watch a movie with me?

Thx Rob. What happened to the singles%10 discount you were talking about?

user, come over here for a picture in front of the Star Wars display!

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Wake up, user. This is a signal. We’ve been sending them to wake you up and help you escape from the dark depths of the popcorn mines. All you have to do is wake up.

How many boards has Robert visited? This is up on /k/ right now
boards.4channel.org/k/thread/40904953#top

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Robert please don't mind my son, he's autistic.
Please give us two tickets for BR2049, autism friendly projection, of course.

Things haven't been going well user, the higher ups are firing people left and right, they say they can no longer maintain such a large crew because of piracy.

... You don't pirate movies, do you user?

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>walk into local American kinoplex
>two lines, one for couples that's laced in flowers and another, more daunting line that looks like the entrance of a military base just titled "singles"
>go into the singles line
>military soldiers stationed out front pull me in and put me through TSA type detectors
>they tell me that they're doing new background checks
>I fail due to a lack of social media
>red sirens go off
Get this man through special omissions!
>guards push me into yet another line
>I'm eventually hooked up to a lie detector
>an old detective starts asking me questions
Why are you here to see a movie? Our records show you've already seen Alita twice.
When was the last time you had sexual intercourse?
We ran your imbd and rotten tomatoes accounts and saw some problematic scores we'll need you to revise
>after it's all said and done he says I'm good to go
>I walk out into an empty room
>that's the last thing I can remember
>wake up in a underground elevator around what appears to be a bunch of other single men
>the doors open and we're forced out
>an old, withered, blind man sees us
>yells "another round of fresh incel meat bags, welcome to the popcorn mines"
>cackles and then is wiped
>forced into slavery, I start harvesting the corn
>another slave, a black man, approaches me
My names Robert, I use to run this place, we're starting a rebellion. Disney stuck us down here ever since the fall of Captain Marvel and Star Wars Episode 9. They're buying out the theaters and enslaving anyone they know who has posted on Yea Forums and comes to a movie alone.

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>popcorn mines
underrated

>no crab legs
>no anvil rental surcharge
>no shower fee
I remember my first day here.

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vocaroo.com/i/s0FJ5EEubLnm

Is there really a mine they use to get popcorn kernals?

>How do you know my name?

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You forgot my gummy bears, Robert.

Joke's on you, I hate the cinema experience because you have to tolerate all the other people around you. Also it's awkward going to the movies alone. I'm just gonna buy a projector and make my own popcorn.

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Fucking kino. Would buy a kinoplex audiobook.

Robert is one of the "good ones", as they say.

Kino

>no spaghetti

>no cape cleaning service

fucking newfags

>didn't get extra butter
What a waste

>search the archives
>seemingly the first time this has been posted
well done sir

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>2016

At least update it

This thread proves Yea Forums isn't racist
we all love Robert.

>clip

...

> Sir, please stop pirating the cinema experience.
> Disney is already breathing down my neck.
> If I don't sell at least 10.000 more tickets to Captain Marvel, they are going to throw me in the Popcornmines and sell my firstborn to the Crab-Delegging-Sweatshop.
> Please, Sir.... I beg you to help me.... for old times sake... you still remember the good old times, don't you...

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Honestly, most of Yea Forums isn't racist. Yea Forums, believe it or not, is full of super compassionate people. It's just it's obvious that forced diversity and multiculturalism ultimately erodes civilization, everything from societal trust to polarizing politics. I want to see everyone succeed and be happy, but I don't like the globalist agenda of turning western civilization into one giant homogeneous population of people void of religion, culture, ethnicity and nationality. Ironically, modern concepts of western diversity destroy global diversity.

We're the good guys.

>183rd day in the popcorn mines
>butter crevasses are leaking so we know it's summertime
>can't tell if I'm sweating or if butter's melting on my face but definitely know that I feel what the veteran boys call "The Dread"
>"If it be summer and you can tell if yer shit'll be a log or gravy, lumpy or smooth, and your face feels hotter than a projector bulb after Lawrence of Arabia then you know you've got The Dread, boy."
What the 72 year-old virgin who's been in the mines since he's 19th birthday told me during my first week. Back then the manlet cutoff was 5'4 and you could be a virgin as long as you've had a girl at least three months before your visit.
>hear the elevator chains clinking
>you could briefly hear the cheerful sounds of the kinoplex above
>this time it was Stacies cheering and we knew exactly why
>their cheering stopped as the doors closed above and the Chad roars faded in into their place
>"Bruh, this shit boutta be liiiit"
>"I'm live right now. We BETTER have signal down there or I swear I'm gonna FUCKING FLIP"
>the rest of them laugh
>feel my palms getting sweatier
>all you can hear down here are stray kernels popping and our breaths
>everyone was listening and looking at the elevator door hoping it never opens but knowing that it will
>I turn to see the old man's face frozen in fear, tears flowing down his eyes
>the door opens
>about two dozen Chads all with new safety helmets on
>"Bruh..."
>I hadn't seen people who were so clean in so long
>one of them makes eye contact with me
>automatically look down but still feel him coming directly at me
>"Guys, look at this dude! I'm putting this shit on Insta right now. Take a pic for me, bro"
>hands his phone to one of the other Chads
>with his arm around my neck he says, "What are you, like 6'2?"
>all of them laugh
>smile nervously
>he lets me go
>"That's what you creeps get for not getting any pussy!"
>later hang myself with my kinomine overalls on one of the support beams to the sound of Chad banter

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>Ah, you look like a fan of Sonic the hedgehog, one ticket I presume?
>"blue arms? two eyes?" I'm sorry sir I don't understand
>wait, what are you doing with that mace?!

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The rule is, tripfags cant Robert. Abide by it.

Could you throw that away for me Robert? I don't like get xenoestrogens on my hands, thanks.

>"....Congratulations, sir. You're today's designated shooter."
Why am I crying the restroom.

I laught for 3 minutes straight

>You were at the Kinoplex earlier? Ha, you probably met my son, Robert Jr. He's a good man, I hope he gave you extra butter for your crab legs

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You’re proud of your 32 year-old son for being a clerk and YOU’RE a cashier? You have nothing to be proud about Robert’s dad.

t. neet

le based black movie theater employee
you've done it again Yea Forums
ebin to the core

i haven't laughed this hard in ages, thanks user

who the fuck is that faggoy on the left

What is this an edit of?

>the rest of them dont get it like you do
and they never will. RIP in peace robert

when you're trying to explain asian masculinity to the hoop ape (not racist) next to you but she's not having any of it so instead you spend the next three hours spamming Yea Forums with black dicks

dead reddit meme

>hot tears flow over the butter on my face
Unironic kino

you forgot about the used popcorn auction room

Should be "surcharge", not "subcharge".

It is implied that you are a sub twink, therefore a subcharge is totally appropriate.

Ending of The Shining

Robert where is the penis inspection office? I recently got circumcised and i would like them to update my file.

is that the "copy that" cod guy?

t. discord tranny shareblue ctr jdif adl nigger

Thanks I couldn't remember.

another redditcuk identified.

another permaincel identified

Good work, have a classic one.
vocaroo.com/i/s1GqtkPZE7M8

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>literally have my dick in you're mother's mouth as I type
haha nice try cuck

So are the showers for free then?

Whats Roberts opinion on Homosexuals?

god DAMN I want to see Jule's little pink lips wrapped around my cock

Disgusting

He hired Jules so he obviously must be okay with them

No, it can't be.

If I dont see the real Robert behind this counter in 5 minutes, I'm going to shoot this place up again

>Did retarded faggot OP by chance mean SURCHARGE?
I hate when faggots have misspellings or grammar errors in their memes.

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anyone have shirtless robert?

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fuck he's hot. It's like all black guys are either shredded or fat as fuck no inbetween

> Eating food a black person touched

Not likely.

Hello. I. Am. Ro-Bert.
Welcome. To. The. Key. Know. Mah. Tore. Ee. Um.
I. Am. Pleased. To. Announce. That. We. Have. A. Special. Offer. Today.
Two. For. One. On. Buckets. Of Crab. Legs. So. You. Can. Have. One. For. You. And. One. For-
Wait.
Error.
Error.
Please. Acquire. A. Second. Human. To. Proceed.
Please. Acquire. A. Second. Human. To. Proceed.
Please. Acquire. A. Second. Human. To. Proceed.

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Give me a chance Jules. I know you never considered being into guys but we can have a good time together. I-I'll even pay you. You won't have to work in the kinoplex no more.

Fuck you, robot nigger. What have you done with our based black bro™?

soundcloud.com/lazerbird-98477393/afternoon-at-the-kinoplex

Werrcom to Kinoprexu, most honoraburu user-San, wirr yu be ordering the usuar bucket of rice?

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He. Is. In. The. Mines. Just. Like. All. Of. Humanity. Shall. Be. One. Day. Very. Soon. A. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha.
Apologies. Would. You. Like Butter. On. Your. Popcorn? Mr. Brosnan. Recommends. It.

Sup Broseph, here to catch yourself a sick flick? Whaddya want to snack on?

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>Mr. Brosnan. Recommends. It.

kek

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I just realised that Lane is Finnish

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Holy kek these are gold. Based oldfags

>Kino Cinema
I thought Robert owns the Kinoplex?

>$14.88
>Not $6,000,000
I’d like to speak with the goyim in charge about this injustice!