You are the worst person I know. You constantly hit on your best friend's wife. The man pays for your food and rescued you from certain death, and this is how you repay him? And to add insult to injury, you defecate all over his yard. And you're such a sponge. You pay for nothing. You always say, "I'll get you later," but later never comes. And what really bothers me is you pretend you're this deep guy who loves women for their souls when all you do is date bimbos. Yeah. I date women for their bodies, but at least I'm honest about it. I don't buy them a copy of Catcher in the Rye and then lecture them with some seventh-grade interpretation of how Holden Caulfield was some profound intellectual. He wasn't! He was a spoiled brat. And that's why you like him so much. He's you. God, you're pretentious! And you delude yourself by thinking you're some great writer, even though you're terrible. You know, I should have known Cheryl Tiegs didn't write me that note. She would have known there's no "A" in the word "definite. " And I think what I hate most about you is your textbook liberal agenda. How we should "legalize pot, man. " How big business is crushing the underclass. How homelessness is the biggest tragedy in America. Well, what have you done to help? I work down at the soup kitchen, Brian. Never seen you down there. You want to help? Grab a ladle! And by the way, driving a Prius doesn't make you Jesus Christ. Wait! You don't believe in Jesus Christ or any religion, for that matter, because religion is for idiots! Well, who the hell are you to talk down to anyone? You failed college twice, which isn't nearly as bad as your failure as a father. How's that son of yours you never see? But you know what? I could forgive all of that, all of it, if you weren't such a bore. That's the worst of it, Brian. You're just a big, sad, alcoholic bore! I'll see you, Brian. Thanks for the fucking steak.
You are the worst person I know. You constantly hit on your best friend's wife...
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Smoke
Big words coming from a pedophile and necrophile.
TAKE THOSE SNEAKERS OFF
sneed
They really ruined brian as a character huh?
The thing is that this scene would have been amazing had it been anyone other than quagmire. If it was Cleveland saying this then it would have been 10/10.
I find this thread... shallow and pedantic.
Setting up a hateable character to tear down doesn't make a rant on them epic.
Despite being a slut, Quagmire is the most sensible one in the group.
He's not just a slut he's a full on rapist
oh god shut up
Yeah he's based get fuckt roastie
When did family guy stopped being funny?
Brian may be a pseudo intellectual communist scum, but Quagmire is self righteous in the clutch. No room for Jesus what so ever.
You smoking yet?
what do you expect from stupid dogs
You are the worst farmer I know. You constantly fuck and suck your best friend's wife. The man pays for your gucci loafers and rescued you from certain death, and this is how you repay him? And to add insult to injury, you seed and feed all over his yard. And you're such a city slicker. You pay for nothing. You always say, "I'll feed you later," but later never comes. And what really bothers me is you pretend you're this sneed who loves seed for their feed when all you do is suck and fuck. Yeah. I suck and fuck, but at least I'm honest about it. I don't buy them a fancy car and then lecture them with some seventh-grade interpretation of how Farmer #2 was some profound intellectual. He wasn't! He was a spoiled brat. And that's why you like him so much. He's you. God, you're pretentious! And you delude yourself by thinking you're some great farmer, even though you're terrible. You know, I should have known Sneed didn't feed me that seed. He would have known there's no "K" in the word "Tomacco. " And I think what I hate most about you is your textbook Sneed agenda. How we should "legalize feed, man. " How big business is crushing the underclass farmers. How homelessness is the biggest tragedy in Springfield. Well, what have you done to help? I work down at the seed and feed, city slicker. Never seen you down there. You want to help? Grab a shovel! And by the way, driving a fancy car doesn't make you Jesus Christ. Wait! You don't believe in Jesus Christ or any religion, for that matter, because religion is for idiots! Well, who the hell are you to talk down to anyone? You failed farm school twice, which isn't nearly as bad as your failure as a brothel owner. How's that suck of yours you never fuck? But you know what? I could forgive all of that, all of it, if you weren't such a bore. That's the worst of it, city slicker. You're just a big, sad, alcoholic bore! I'll see you, city slicker. Thanks for the fucking suck.
Not even the right show.
I hope you feel like that was worth your time.
S
Based
Cringe
A mystery box could be anything, it could even be a boat
Cleveland is a pretty shit character
sneakers o'toole
They made him a better character by turning him into a parody of a pretentious pseudointellectual
They ruined everyone as characters
>judging people on their sexual preference.
wew lad, check the calendar for the current year.
(You) are a faggot
Brian is essentially the embodiment Yea Forums.
Check'd
they made it better by turning him into a joke desu
they used to play it completely straight which was kind of awful
Mah boi
where do you think you are?
Based and sneedpilled
>You constantly hit on your best friend's wife.
It's funny cause he does too.
The just made all the characters too hateable in FG. It feels like no characters on the show like each other.
And a baby murderer.
youtube.com
>one of those creepy guys that just uses a woman for sex
what exactly is wrong with this?
Murdering her family afterwards. Including the baby.
I'm talking about the general concept Lois chastised Brian for
honestly impressive
did anyone notice that episode where peter understood something that stewie said
HIT
What i hate most about this scene is this is coming from the guy that not only hits on his best friend’s wife but his daughter too, gave up his daughter for adoption because it got in the way of his bachelor lifestyle, is a known rapist/pedophile/necrophile pretty much every phile there is in the book, and blames his mom for all of his problems. This would be normal behavior of someone in their 30s but he’s a senior citizen. Fuck Quagmire.
it wouldn't have fucking made sense.
you ever heard the saying, "It takes one to know one?"
>Thanks for the fucking suck.
That was nice
why would quagmire work at a soup kitchen?
Why was Seth dissing himself
The point is, if quagmire is telling you this shit, you better take 5 and reevaluate your life.
He's right about Brian but also Quagmire is a rapist sex predator who passes around STDs to everyone and wants to fuck his best friend's wife, too.
The bit about Catcher in the Rye is great. I love that book but Holden literally is a little teenage twat.
me on the right
Good god thats how you spend your time
yikes
Irony being every time it looks like Peter is dead or out of the picture, Quagmire immediately hits up Lois.
i sincerely wish i were more like you
keep up the good work user
This. He was a pretty weak character in the first few season to be honest.
Was originally half of a buddy comedy team known as Larry and Steve before Seth retooled it to be a Simpsons clone for Fox. Steve/Brian was the straight man and Larry/Peter was the idiot. Of course since the show has gone on for far too long the only trick the writers have is to make everyone an asshole and try to squeeze some conflict out of that. Brian and Quagmire don't exist, they're characters voiced by the same guy. Stop posting this thread, faggots. Next you're going to tell me Lisa Simpson is a bitch, wow what a hot take as though the character could do that spontaneously instead of it being a symptom of seasonal rot. Wow.
Objects cannot consent.
Engage in coitus
Not an argument.
Not a man (until you've experienced intercourse)
>character has no personality
>writers give him one
>"IT'S A TRICK! THEY'RE JUST CHARACTERS VOICED BY THE SAME MAN!"
whoa
brian fucked his dad
literally me
That's the point. It unironically subverts expectations
Family guy was never good.
"Hey Lois, remember the time when I was X with Y"
Rinse repeat.
You know he doesn't. The writer just needed to inject some moral superiority in him with one line
He already said at least he was honest about it.
Incel (formerly innocent)
have sex.
Don't cut yourself on that edge /pol/tard, back to your containment board
incel
I lost my v-card (formerly had one)