Kevin Smith crying thread

>I'm having such an emotional moment right now
>Hold on, let me take a selfie so I can post about it on social media

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What an oddly shaped head.

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Have sex incels

Who here thinks he'll finally eat a bullet when his shitty Jay and Silent Bob movie bombs

>I have a vagina!

I'd fuck my daughter like Smith if I had one

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Why he's always crying, does have the last pair of huge jorts left on earth?

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>crying because your name appeared on a book in a MCU movie

God how pathetic. He is another progressive type I guess?

>you do know they are acting and not really doing it right

I'm saying it's badly written and a stupid idea
It's like the part of clerks 2 when two grown ass men working at mcdonalds are mocking a teenager like they're better than him. Yeah it's meant to emphasize how out of touch the character is, but it's still cringy and pathetic to watch one of the protagonists do something like that
>YOU DO KNOW THAT ITS WRITTEN BADLY ON PURPOSE RIGHT?

why did this make me laugh so hard

I'll sell him my old jorts if he wants. I wear dad khakis now

Poor guy. Rough day (as rubs back cuckishly)

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>It was Randall and he called Smith an untalented hack and told him to go fuck his daughter

God damn that sounds based as fuck.
Anybody got a link to this story?

Writing a cringy/pathetic situation automatically means its bad writing?

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>Imagine being Kevin Smith's daughter and you have to go on social media and read your dad write about having sex with your mom and her brown stained taint.
>Then you have to go act in some of your dad's movies where your sole purpose in being there is to wear yoga pants or booty shorts for fat gen-x comic book nerds to jack off to.

Thanks dad

I have a residual fondness for this dude because I watched clerks in highschool and listened to smodcast for a bit, but Goddamn this dude will cry a river if so much as his spliff goes out. I know your thankful for your blessed life but keep your shit together for fucks sake.

He is a white male doing what white males do, which is act like cucks.

>Writing a cringy/pathetic situation automatically means its bad writing?

Did you enjoy the part where dante goes up on the roof top of the restaurant and learns how to dance and then suddenly they break into some kind of bollywood number set to michael jacksons ABC123?

I have never cringed at any movie harder than I cringed at that.

>your dad write about having sex with your mom and her brown stained taint
hold on wHAT

>JUST

this is the quality content i come to Yea Forums for

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twitter.com/thatkevinsmith/status/2554608773?lang=en

I wonder how many times he's "accidentally" walked in on her and a nigger

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>twitter.com/thatkevinsmith/status/2554608773?lang=en
Did this motherfucker seriously name his daughter Harley Quinn????

>pOwns
it hurts

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needs to make a movie where him and his wife fuck their own daughter.

Imagine being Ivanka and having to read about your father jerking off to you

>The absolute size of that fucking schnozz.
Wait a second I wonder what her mother's name is
>Jennifer ((((Schwalbach))))

>Read her details
>married kevin smith in april 1998
>gives birth to harley quinn in june 1998
>he gives her a role in Jay and Silent Bob

hahahaha kike whore was knocked up

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It's already about 1 day in time to step up and pay to kill captcha. Recommended? Help me I can't drunk fap with captcha

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Who?

>Jennifer ((((Schwalbach)
doesnt he give his wife a nude scene?

imagine the smell

>Take it, take it, nonono it'll look good, I look cool as fuck, take it I'll look sad, I swear I didn't kill her, just take the pic!

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is this fag on the rag or what? who the fuck cries that often?

Your president's daughter

>HAHAHA DUDE THATS SO POST-MODERN

wtf. is he really this non self aware

>wtf. is he really this non self aware
No, it's supposed to be a funny meme

What kind of man cries and takes a photo of himself crying?

it isn't though.
and look at these fucking comments holy shit i fucking hate reddit
reddit.com/r/Frisson/comments/53hhvx/image_patton_oswalt_celebrating_his_emmy_win/

>lol muh wife dead me sad buy my albums
>lol thx
>wifes joker's ex gf
>now have two lolis in his household

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This whole crying thing started right when he started smoking weed.

Based!

This one was actually fucked up and left me with a really bad after taste, i got fully sumerged on the a crow looked at me memeing just for him to spring this like 2 weeks after.

Source?

what you mean THIS presidents daughter?

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god i'd make that kike slut suck my dick backwards so she can get a noseful of my unwiped asshole hnnnnnnng

grief sells really well, just ask sufjan stevens. this fuck probably got himself promoted to fucking with a top echelon of rich artsy gay dudes.

Oh believe you me i've been burned by that mega homo too. Fucking for all Yea Forums talks about dishonest directors i'd say dishonest musicians are much worse and blatant it's bound to be because it feels more intimated just because how stripped back and peronal it can be percieved as compared to a film production.

Why does he always make that same face in every pic he's in? It's the equivalent of the s o y open mouth face.

>wifes jokers ex gf
>2 lolis in household
wait what?

I remember even at the time "who's this busted looking bitch hanging out with Eliza Dushku and Shannon Elizabeth"?

The king of humble bragging.

In happier times.

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He makes his daughter cry on camera, as well.

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>eating a whole block of cheese as a snack on the go
This is peak American

I wonder if he ever bought a burner phone and catfished his own daughter for nude pics haha.

Objectively the most overrated director of all time

>tfw no bouncy tittied Rosario Dawson to teach you to dance.

no way fag

"On September 14, 2010, Anderson made his first appearance on Smith's SModcast filling in for Scott Mosier on SModcast #134. In his podcast, Anderson stated he had moved out of Los Angeles and into a "retirement community in the mountains" where he is "the youngest person there by 20 years." He also said he remarried in 2009, to an actress named Barbara Jacques[5] he met while house sitting for Kevin Smith.[1]

In April 2017, it was confirmed that production on the proposed sequel Clerks III had ceased, as Anderson was not interested in appearing in the Kevin Smith directed film. Although an $8 million budget had been obtained, locations were being scouted in Philadelphia and a crew was being assembled, with less than 2 months until production was to start, Anderson decided he would not be involved; the reasons have not been made public. Smith said he would not recast the role and production on the film was halted indefinitely.[6][7]"

That's a shop you ignoramus. Although to be fair the original cheese block eater was probably American

I'd do it. He's living the father's dream, he's taken his daughter and molded her to his PRECISE specifications. She's exactly how he wants her to be, starting with her very name. She's almost like a test-tube baby without the test-tube. The best part for him is that she doesn't even seem aware of any of it.

ugly crying general

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You're on a board full of virgins who bomb reviews of movies with women. Literally nobody is a bigger loser than an adult male virgin.

This doesn't at all describe what the fag who used the word "hack" said.

looks like the president equipped his daughter...with BAleestikz too

Could you provide a source or a link to something more specific? i can't find any concrete info on it. Just Smith lamenting that it won't happend.

Clerks 2 was just awful. I cringed when he used it as a platform to rant about how Star Wars was better than LOTR
>DURR ALL LOTR HAS IS WALKING
>SAM AND FRODO GAAAY
Comedy genius

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based

> Literally nobody is a bigger loser than an adult male virgin.
Look in the mirror, adult "female" virgin tranny.

pump your genitals into another genitals with consent

Incels literally haven't become men.

Only if it was a female nigger. Everything I've heard is she's gay as fuck.

She was in Playboy. Learn to google.

Sometimes I cry when I drink

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Wow, youfn queens are really burnt that CM didnt bomb, huh?

frankly there is literally nothing wrong with eating a block of cheese

that type of thing was pretty in line with the prior clerks movie. The only real difference (And the reason it doesnt work as well) is that while Clerks 1 had the dispute about Star Wars and death star contractors, Star Wars was already a 20 year old movie that would have been a big part of the characters lives, and so much of the joke is that they are willing to drop anything to argue about it (hence the cutaway gag to Jay literally stealing shit because they're so distracted) whereas Clerks II has that LOTR thing that was like a Gen-Xer defending his loves but LOTR was too new and Smith didn't really have much to say about it honestly. The scene is OKAY but it's not great.

The real indefensible scene is the dance number.

Getting emotional and worked up over a movie or whatever is fine, kevin, but why post it LITERALLY EVERY TIME?

For all the things I'm ashamed of in my life, I am so happy that I hate reddit.

Based

I like most of Smith early work, but let's be honest, he's really just a proto-soiboy/bugman. What do you expect?

The kind of cheese makes all the difference in that opinion.

moar

lol

y he cry tho

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did he just watch one of his films for the first time and realize he's the worst director of all time?

Do you think about trump all day?

He isn't a dumbass who thinks expressing emotions is bad

that pic is actually kino tho

>Im crying
>Quick better take a selfie and post it on twitter.

Modern men are a joke.

Why is this guy "offering up" his daughter in every picture of them together?

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I remember seeing him crying at the scene in The Flash when Barry has to see his mom die and I got it because I cried at that shit too, but then I found out the dude just cries at everything, and i'ts like "Oh."

I can't believe I was a fan of this bitch back in the early 00's

Fuck him

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Kev was reduced to a blubbering mess by this: youtube.com/watch?v=InUj9BT8KCc

I mean, I'm all about embracing sincerity. But c'mon man.

no fucking way, isn't he a big comic guy? how the fuck can you be anything but numb to Batman's origin at this point.

You see people post some dumb shit online like "oh my god. I had tears in my eyes when everyone died in Infinity wars" or "I was so moved that I cried when I saw this character rise up against the villain." It seems like just disingenuous grandstanding but these retards actually exist. Kevin Smith and his ilk literally cry over cartoon characters like a bunch of fucking losers.

I don't think I can take movies seriously anymore after all this bullshit lately.

jesus fucking christ look at that lack of style.

Say that to my face, faggot.

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i wonder how many years have been since Kevin's calves have felt warm. I wonder if they ever have.

Seriously.

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It's even worse than expected.

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CУКATBOЮMATЬ CУКATBOЮMATЬ БЛЯ CУКA БЛЯ CУКA БЛЯ БЛЯ БЛЯ

the fuck

I am laughing on the outside
Crying in the inside

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The scene where 1979 by Smashing Pumpkins plays was actually decent imo

You already would've had sex if you have a daughter.

he's a typical american man child