What are some aquatic kinos?

They're Cephalopods.

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>GLUB GLUB GLUB GLUB MSHRSBN
>[We don't -expect- you to do anything, Mr. Bond..]

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they're not even close to fish, we are closer to fish genetically speaking than them
which also makes them utterly fascinating, as they are the only truly intelligent invertebrates, it's the closest you can get to an alien intelligence without leaving the planet

they are proof that Aliens exist. they are the only lifeform on Earth that doesnt have any evolutionary history, they just appeared.

They are us from the future except they lost their exosuits.

Blue Planet and Blue Planet II.

Attenborough is literally the only reason people pay for the meme TV License in the UK.

>tfw you get too close to a feeding whale.

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>American version sometimes actually go and dub over Attenborough
still don't understand why

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I fucking love the sea

if you ever go to the zoo, find out what time they do the feeding at the invertebrate house. watching the cuttlefish flip the fuck out and turn fifty different colors when they dropped a shrimp in its tank was one of the coolest things ive ever witnessed.

no, their bodies barely leave any kind of fossil so it's difficult to study their evolutionary history.

>they are the only lifeform on Earth that doesnt have any evolutionary history, they just appeared.
What?

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I'd punch the shit out of that horny dolphin.

Jacques Cousteau's ship accidentally ramming a baby whale twice, follow it until it bleeds to death, watch it get attacked by sharks, and then having the crew kill the sharks because they hate them was a pretty good bit. Also that scene in which he uses dynamite in a coral reef to check the fish population by counting how many floated to the surface (and of what species they were).

youtube.com/watch?v=K8KkNC2bCBk
Check 48:30 and onwards.

reminds me of my nutsack on a humid day

Imagine the smell

The dolphin isn't horny he just smells fish.

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he has his dick out lol

it may be,but dolphins use to masturbate rubing themselves against things so...

>dick suddenly pops out
>isn't horny

that dolphin doesn't have to hehe

no, dolphins are notorious rapists
I mean they even go for the blowholes of smaller dolphins

heh

Has a woman ever been raped by a dolphin?

I hope so

I hope so.

I hope so.

Sperm Whales are fuckin neat

Every other soft-bodied invertebrate leaves a fossil record

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>underwater no one can hear you scream

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>>American version sometimes actually go and dub over Attenborough

Absolutely fucking disgusting.

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>the chad bear
>the virgin seal

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Giant waterbug from Japan

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Ice is just frozen water, so water kino right here.

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any links to these shows?

Live action Little Mermaid is pushing boundaries

Bears are small time.

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What the fuck are you talking about? We have loads of shelled cephalopod fossils too.

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it sucked his dick???!!

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fucking brutal

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Has there ever been a horror movie focused on turtles?

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he escaped

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Turtles could fuck your shit up

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Bobit works are fucking nightmare fuel

wonder why they haven't released any of cousteaus films in HD

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felt good man

Jaguar attacks woman trying to take selfie at zoo

Yes I saw that too, imagine being that silly.

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DOLPHD

You may be thinking "But they are so slow. How could they possibly be scary?" That is exactly what they want you to think.

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youtube.com/watch?v=pII_2VbgheI
Sit down and get comfy

orcas are horrible people

Saved

Does the woman who got mauled by that Jaguar at the zoo after she jumped over the barrier, have a criminal record?

Nah just bury your fingers in his eyes.

dude....

>he didn't fly so good

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nature is very scary

Now I want to fap

>aww man

Dolphins actually have been known to drown people on purpose and then take them back to "rape caves" and do unspeakable things to them. They're one of the few underwater creatures that are cognizant of the fact that humans need oxygen tanks to breathe underwater and they'll go after the oxygen tank while divers are deep underwater and try to break the thing. Octopi and certain types of squid are also aware of it and there have been cases of an octopus latching onto a diver and holding him down until his air ran out and he suffocated. It sounds like bullshit but it's completely true, look it up.

reddit thread

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yeah what the actual fuck

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Sometimes. Here's a sloth swimming in search of love.

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humbolt squids have pulled off divers masks and breathers

she on her period

>t. flying fish

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You're missing a word there nigger.

>they expect one of us in the wreckage brotha!

Right yeah those are the squid I was thinking of, they sure are assholes

thats one of them el goblino sharks

i'm never leaving my moms basement again

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Imagine still being a creationist while witnessing living proof of fish evolving into birds.

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fuck off you fat piece of shit

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epin

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No I think it's just your regular shark.

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oh no its so shy

what a dickhead

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/Our dolphin/

im gonna meet you in 30 minute

that frog just got free head

absolutely Jebaited

lmao

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Fuck you muther fuker

Reminds me of that King of the Hill episode.

based

What would you do?

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OUT am I?

Why do animals never seem to be focused on one thing like us ? They're in the middle of killing something yet they're looking all around, disinterested.
I'm going to sleep, and I better have a response when I'm waking up.

When he got there she already had a kid lmao.

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Jumped out of my fucking chair, I had no idea they could move like that

>you can clearly see the dolphin's boner

If this isn't hard evidence that dolphins are truly intelligent creatures I don't know what is.

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>harassing the larger animal for fun
they were just middle schoolers

what kind of faggot have nails like that ?

Reminds me of Helen Mirren in Age of Consent.

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is this real?

Imagine drowning and this is your closest source of air haha

Did they died?

>ambiguous ending
film 101 tier

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It isn't, but those are the worst things ever and proof that god exists and he's evil.

he dieded?

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it for sure mauled the shit out of it and ate it raw youtube.com/watch?v=zNO0kxTClYo

see you soon

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He was fine.

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fuzzy legs but damn... Helen Mirrin... where do I know her from?

>unspeakable
you just said rape earlier in the sentence, you can probably say it one more time

do that with a lemon and the mothefucker aint gonna bite for a while

>dolphins are notorious rapists
So that's why they're smarter than us.

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Orcas are fucking assholes.

Feel free to try it

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>where do I know her from?

Dame Helen Mirren, a British actress who often gets naked.

also one of the few actually fun, interesting and non cancerous threads ive seen in a long time

really makes you think

This is why you don't feed your jellyfish LSD

Soon he shall reach his Perfect form

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Would love some more deep sea horror films that don't involve "magic portals underwater" or "hidden sea bed" Hell, make a movie about the planet gj1214-b.

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Anyone got that webm of someone feeding a chilli to a turtle?

what ps2 game is this

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OO MASSA FINNA MAKE ME SQUIRT

Thanks, m8

A grad student was bullied into giving one a footjob IIRC.

cute desu

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How far have dinosaurs fallen.

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>chucking seals at birds just to be a dick
orcas are peak chad

There's nothing wrong with letting others do all the hard work for you.

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":3 moar"

They had a good run.

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Cute but all finches are literal fags and retards

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>the virgin cat
>the chad chicken

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Can we stop posting this retarded meme garbage?

If I fuck that will I die? Because I really wanna fuck it from those eyes alone

You can practically see its sentience in its eyes
Literal alien

It would be extremely painful.

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source

delet this.

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>be giant lizard that exists only for eating shit
>have a food in your mouth
>throw it instead of eating it

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where did you find this footage of me

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>Yea Forums /an/ /sci/ Yea Forums
>the one and only true broship

She's lifting her dress for the camera. Even octowomen are sluts.

based dolphin rape caves poster

OUT OF MY WAY WATER FUCKING SHITS

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who created life?

i want to eat that

Say hi. There's like one known incident where an orca attacked a human in the wild. They don't view human as prey.

What are some movies in which one daring character single-handedly changes the course of history forever with one decision?

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harmless or not. a very big animal in the sea would still make most people, myself included, shit bricks

>"Data SOMETHING'S GOT MEEEEE!!!"

Every animal gets some pleasure out of physical contact. Mating wouldn't happen otherwise. So many animals are wired to get huge dopamine rushes out of very fleeting interactions.

Humans are adapted for grooming the way we're adapted for speech: no other animal holds a candle to us.

To any animal that acclimate to our presence we're like crack.

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lmao

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yes, it's real. pic related is the right way to move one since they are lightning fast and have a neck as long as their shell

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This. I am in holy terror at the thought of being in the water with a baleen whale. I know they're harmless, and even kind in their way. But they still scare the piss out of me.

the silent world is unironically kino. cousteau was driven by actual curiosity of the natural world unlike all these scientists today

;_;

Unironically Subnautica

They look a little old for school.

Squid and Octopus does taste nice.

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what pokemon is this

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>I can see her slit

>take cruise to Alaska
>shitty short organized excursions at a few stops
>get to Icy Strait
>fuck the excursions im just going to walk around
>walk down to the shoreline
>its low tide
>thousands upons thousands of brightly covered starfish, anemones, sea cucumbers, eels, fish, crabs, shrimp everywhere
>absolutely magnificent, the most life filled place ive ever been
>dozens of sun stars literally 1.5-2ft across
>great clusters of massive Bat Stars clinging to the rocks
>approach the water
>its filled with white dots
>the white dots are all jellyfish
>look up
>an entire pod of Orca breaching 30 feet away
>a small octopus hides in a crevice near me
>pet its squishy head

Alaska is 24/7 nature kino

god i wish that were me

cute!

did the octopus like it?

absolute unit

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thats just an average Mako bra, the jaw extension is seen in many sharks, but especially noticable with the goblin shark

Those Toadline guys are taking smashing and slamming to new heights.

That's kind of hot.

It makes me hate Florida even more when I see these beautiful creatures with their backs scarred by propellers

anyone got that webm of the alligator biting the other gator's leg off?

pure kino

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that's terrifying, yet adorable

OP here, thanks for keeping this comfy aquatic thread up bros
there’s hope for this board yet

That's nothing, read this

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Octopi are snails with the shell on the inside.

Day of the rake when?

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say hello and mention my mutual hatred for SeaWorld niggers

Never

Look at those beauties

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>Faggot mod killed the underwater thread the other day
>Get to this one already 200+ posts in and too late to properly enjoy it
Damn

but why do flying fish still exist if they all turned into birds? Checkmate atheist.

He cute

its not florida's fault dumb kids go too fast in the intercoastal

>Accept, if possible!
What.. what the fuck did I just read.

Anything with such camouflage ability I really adore.

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Filename won't go unnoticed

>there have been cases of an octopus latching onto a diver and holding him down until his air ran out and he suffocated
There is not a single species of octopus large enough to overpower even a child. You idiot. Most species are smaller than your hand, and the rare few that are larger aren't bigger then your head.

Rude.

They even mimic the way actual leafs move with the wind while they walk around.

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lol, female dolphins are crazy

source?

OOOOOO CAAAANNAAAADDAAA

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Are the red, yellow and green all the same species? Do they change to match the season? Or do they just live for one mating season?

Cool they probably just killed that turtle.

They are cephalopods, molluscs
Here's where they are on our family tree

They are not spiders, which are from a monophyletic group
They are not fish, which is a paraphyletic.

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I think hes confusing octopi and squid. Speaking of which, Humboldt squid are some mean motherfuckers. A friends dad used to dive off the Western coast of Mexico and he said theyd always try and rip off his mask, flying at him while rapidly changing colors. Sounds like a nightmare.

>when /an/ is too slow so you have to /an/post on Yea Forums
Only the most patrician tier posters can relate

based insectoids.

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They live for about a year, although they can't change their color.

You know who reports an orca attack when there's only one human around?

Nobody. That's who.

fuck me theres something unnerving about how fucking huge blue whales are

imagine living in the age of sail and getting to discover all this crazy shit while still having 100% faith in god

what the fuck am I reading

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Look up female dolphin, uh, anatomy and tell me you wouldn't.

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>"yeah better stay away from those rape caves and not take my precious dolphin gold"
nice try flippers

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>What bitch?

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what an absolute failure

fart champion

web.archive.org/web/20040131140419/http://www.dolphinsex.org:80/
Some really good tips there, real educational.

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Why did the mantis sperg out?

>those /an/ feels when you made the last post in all threads that are on the front page

>all these animals

Makes me sad when I remember there are ""people"" out there who abuse and torture them to them for fun or because of some old beliefs.

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I think that's a woman dude

The beetle braped on him.

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Looks like a Bombardier beetle spraying some nasty shit from its abdomen and the mantis not liking it. A good defence mechanism for cunts chatting shit.

>orca understand that throwing something high into the air causes it to be in a lot of pain/die when it hits the surface again

holy shit

Oh! My old ring! I should very much like to see it.... one... last time.

reading this gave me a boner

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Pls don't bully the mantis.

such an epic thread bros these are my favorite off topic threads!

new thread at bump limit plz and maybe a jungle or doggo thread?

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Many years ago I volunteered at a certain very prestigious museum. It was attached to a government facility, and was highly secure. One night I was the last person left and I was closing up the place. In the trash there was a nice styrofoam box that some live feed animals had been shipped in.

Even though this was a facility under tight USDA quarantine, I decided there would be no harm in taking it home. I opened it, saw it was in good shape, and carried it out when I locked up. At the outer door a security guard made me give him the box for inspection. We both looked inside, saw nothing, and he handed it back to me.

On the subway I opened the box and looked inside again. Looking back at me was a four-inch long Peruvian stick insect. Pic related: looked very similar. Somehow it had managed to conceal itself against a perfectly white background, with nowhere to hide, and avoid being spotted by me (twice), a security guard trained to look for stolen artifacts, and the museum director, who had thrown the box away.

I still have no idea how it got inside the box. It hadn't been shipped to us in it.

I have never told anyone this story.

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dolphins are smart as fuck

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Did you know that those little cute shits can swoop down and slurp babies' brain fluid through their ears?

But mantis bully eachother.

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>accidentally

aquakino threads are always so comfy

Pierce?

what is that

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The divers new the flounder was hiding there and lured the squid there on purpose. Kinda shitty

You are right user! Let's hop in the next Brie/Alita/cape shit thread.

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Announcing your reports is a bannable offense.

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/an/ threads are good for all boards, user.

Also

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Shit, what a nice get.

There's something really unerving about bugs eating vertebrates.

post good aquatic movie

This looks like my brother.

pretty good kino:
youtube.com/watch?v=S4vxoP-IF2M

Animal threads in general are comfy is what I think you mean.

youtube.com/watch?v=c8aFcHFu8QM

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Innerspace

Fuck im jealous. Do you still have it?

Its times like this where I feel like humans give themselves way too much credit. We are “higher forms” and of course we command powers unheard of in the animal kingdom, but these animals all evolved for millions of years to perfectly fit into their environments. Changing colors near instantaneously, contorting into all manner of shapes, flying, shooting acid out of their asses, sure humans can all do these things with the aid of technology, but to do it because its built into your body? We cant honestly comprehend it. These things are so incredible, their bodies operating with a precision and efficiency that would make a Vacheron Constantin watch look like an Invicta by comparison. For them to take on these forms, its just fun to imagine, fun to look at, meanwhile most peoples reactions to insects are “ewww gross smash that shit”. Fuck, some people even hate moths. How can you hate a moth?!

Literally nothing wrong with this thread, why are you being such a faggot?

This needs a monocle and a top hat.

While working on a marine biology research ship, one of the other students working there had a Team Zissou outfit and played guitar on deck.

You have a large brother, user.

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heh i was just looking at octopus videos and got recomended that too

fucking roastie touching it's brain balls

Good spot, I missed that.

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Fucking uneducated retard

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AYO IS DA LEAFY BUGG

Why did he sperg?

>Fuck, some people even hate moths. How can you hate a moth?!

because they´d peed on your head

Moths are good boys and would do no such thing.

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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Hans Zimmer did this trailer song.

a woman has raped a dolphin on acid before. Hippies and the cold war was a hall of a time

theguardian.com/environment/2014/jun/08/the-dolphin-who-loved-me

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>OUR WHOLE UNIVERSE WAS IN A HOT DENSE STATE!

What possesses someone to say such nonsense? Cephalopods have a documented history going back roughly 500 million years

Yeah, but at least they're harmless. Unless you get smacked by a fin.

MMMMmmmm

That's why you never leave your color...

This one looks like my other brother.

he didn't swim so good

>Sperm Whales are fuckin neat
They have a point... at the end of my harpoons!

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You have a cute other brother, user.

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>15kg
That's a small dog. How weak are you?

Is there anything worse than the fucking retard who spouts HAHA HEY DID YOU GUYS KNOW DOLPHINS ARE RAPISTS?! at the first opportunity as if it isnt some bullshit everyone else hasnt heard before?

Its always great when they do it around me, because when I push back on it for it being the bullshit it is, they get irritated. Stop pushing this retarded fake news bullshit. Dolphins are no more rapists than any other animal, of which nearly all are rapists in some capacity.

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>tfw the thread is on autosage and has reached its limit

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>Do you still have it?
No, this was around 25 years ago. I don't even remember what I did with it. Just that I didn't take it back, because I would have been in deep shit for taking anything out of the museum. I would have been in violation of at least two federal statues. The guard didn't know the box came from a quarantine area.

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The ocean is pure kino.

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The seal is dead at that point. Orcas desecrate the body like that for the sheer joy it brings them

Well it was nice while it lasted.

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I really want to fuck that duchess

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fucking jej

If he threw the starfish off the cliff it would have been some next level shit.

Based fish of forgiveness

underated post

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Wow, David Attenborough was a pretty handsome guy.

Thank you kind anons

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One from last year with Attenborough about ants
youtube.com/watch?v=RdPsVpD6b08

>Accept, if possible!

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>this joke going over all the autist heads

Based

You don't live and work well into your 90's without being at least somewhat handsome.

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what

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>since you will rarely last longer that a minute or two

a blonde on heels would have to trip after every step while trying to run for something interesting to happen

Can't recall his brother being handsome in a role.

a cute.

He was more of an actor/director type.

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>tfw if I were killed and eaten by a whale all of the news articles about it would be jokes because of my name

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what species is this?

Hi Jonah

Reminder Orcas are the mafia of the ocean

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wtf i want to fuck a dolphin now

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abraham?

One minute, tops.

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Why post something so inane and yet so wrong

>Weighing 600 pounds (around 272kg) and having a 30 foot (around 9 meters) arm span, the largest recorded giant pacific octopus was truly enormous. Giant pacific octopuses are powerful predators that are able to eat anything from shrimps and lobsters to birds and likely small sharks.

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