Character goes grocery shopping

Is there something wrong with baguettes? It's honestly patrician teir bread

>character is a loser
>makes healthy meals from scratch in the kitchen instead of buying pre-made garbage

underage b&

I am a loser and I do meals from scratch

>character goes outside
I lost all immersion at this point tb.h

I don't have an oven or I'd attempt it

This
>character doesn't buy a ton of groceries at a time so he maximizes the amount of time he can go without having to go back out grocery shopping

>character makes popcorn over the stove instead of in the microwave
What the fuck

>he doesn't make his kinocorn with coconut oil and flavacol on the stovetop

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>character is American
>boils water in the microwave

>character is European
>eats mold

am i the only one who walks to the front right of the cart and drags it alongside me rather than push it?

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>brown paper bag with no handle

Is this really a thing in America?

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What kind of filthy animal does that?

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Idk, do you also suck the front right side of a dick? Lol treated

Wtf what's your living situation like

>buys ketchup
>doesn't put it in the fridge

>character goes grocery shopping
>doesn't walk past the products he needs because a qt girl is standing infront of or near them
Its like they stopped writing people

>character goes grocery 'shopping'
>no 500 people queue
>no women or children fainting from malnourishment
>no NKVD supervisor making sure the ration is evenly distributed
What is this capitalist propaganda

you have serious mental issues

kek

in america we carry our groceries the way like real men should. only women and sissyboys need handles.

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>character goes grocery shopping
>doesn't have a blueprint of the shop floor with all aisles labeled so that he can plan the most efficient route

>no guy behind him in the queue getting unbearable close and trying to put his shopping on the conveyor when there is barely any space yet

In Finland we have these things you can pull behind you.

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>Not buying a loaf of French bread so you can have a delicious couple slices with your dinner.
Plebs. Just cut off a few slices as you use them, and put it back in the paper bag, put a garbage bag around it, and then place it in the freezer. It will stay fresh for a while.

>using a blueprint
I have it all mapped out in my head and make a snap decisions to find the shortest lines and make the quickest small talk without seeming too awkward.

>no wrapping around the baguette
>character walks down the city street with it
>lets it absorb exhaust from passing cars

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Literally soi.boi baskets

but then you don't feel like you're planning a hostage rescue

Those are for the elderly, everyone else just carries a basket or pushes a cart.

>character has an alternating list of places he buys alcohol from throughout the week so the clerks don't see him coming into the same place everyday to buy booze
So unrealistic, who does that haha

>pulling the wheeled basket full of groceries through a crowded Lidl
>imagine being a truck driver maneuvering through a busy city

>character doesn't get teased by the CUNT cashier for buying tendies again

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Or they eat less food per day.
Those bags of crisps you keep stuffing into your face take up lot of space in grocery bags.

They're called chips

Just that you have to be a millionaire

I get my groceries delivered, pleb. And even the bare basics would take up at least 3 bags.

>character goes grocery shopping
>doesn't smash his trolley off the brain dead public, other wayward trolleys, badly parked cars in the car park, all whilst giving out verbal abuse

>character doesn't shart in the supermart

>character doesn't drift his cart around the aisles while making tire screeching sound effects

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>character drops or spills something and makes a mess
>doorbell rings
>goes to answer the door and never cleans it up

If there are handles you can carry a bag in each hand and strongman your way home

Most Europeans live a short walking distance away from a grocery store, so there's no need to do the entire weeks shopping in one go.

>character is able to parallel park their car in one attempt with no corrections

>character rages and clears shit off desk/table, breaks mirrors/pictures
>no one is ever shown cleaning this up

>so there's no need to do the entire weeks shopping in one go
How about so you don't have to go to the store multiple times a week, retard? Maybe if you had modern roads and parking, you could drive to the store and not have to carry everything the whole distance between the store and your home.

Why would I drive to a store that's literally across the street from where I live?

What? Just how expensive are baguettes? I have never bought one.
t. gluten allergy

>character goes grocery shopping
>the general publics faces aren't randomly contorting between skulls and the images of concerned family and friends
>he doesn't fall into the fridge door cracking it and cutting his forehead open

Because I don't want to eat 6 day old chicken?

What a shitty place to live. Across the street from a grocery store? Yikes.
Your chicken doesn't keep more than 6 days? Do you not have refrigeration?

>What a shitty place to live. Across the street from a grocery store? Yikes.
what did he mean by this?

s e v e n
l i m e s

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Americans can't handle seeing anything but suburbia spreading out in front of them, every house and lawn the same.

Not enough room in there

>get self-checkout bleeper and basket because forgot to take a trolley outside
>grab bag to load things in while shopping, since it's self-checkout
>bag JUST BARELY doesn't fit inside the basket, so it's a pain in the ass
JUST MAKE IT A CENTIMETRE BIGGER ON EACH SIDE REEEEEEE

>two minutes
>not 2 hours
I seriously have to pretend I'm on the phone so I don't get so many dirty looks from people thinking I'm some insane frozen foods fetishist

>it's so much better to live in a highly trafficked area
Even in our cities, we don't want to live near commercial property, dipshit. We like our quiet and privacy.

Baguettes aren't expensive, they just have to be eaten on sight as they don't keep well.

>character goes grocery shopping
>doesn't spend a total of 40 minutes reading the nutritional information for every single item he picks up

>Character is RMS
>eats peel & eat feet

lmao what

>character doesn’t exclusively go to supermarkets which have self-checkout so he can avoid interacting with people for literal weeks
took me right out

Is English not your native language?

>go shopping
>whole trip talks 30 mins
>get exactly what i need, maybe one ectra treat
>gf goes grocery shopping
>takes 2 hours
>comes back with food and clothing and kitchen accessories that arent needed

Real men don't get the Earth to help carry their groceries, mate.

>self-checkout
>not pre-ordering your items online and picking them up at the door

Freeze them in an air tight bag such as a garbage bag. Thaw it out and cut yourself a couple slices and put them in the oven, and then refreeze the rest of the loaf. It will keep for a while and still be remarkably fresh.

>inviting a stranger to your front door

Of course not, I'm European.
>American education

I know.
It's barbaric that we expect the poor to get by on only seven.

>suburbs where every house looks identical
>literally nothing in the area so you have to drive if you want to do ANYTHING
>listening to the sound of cars driving past all night
>I-I didn’t want a grocery store anyway!
vs
>cities where people don’t have 2 driveways, live in apartments/town houses and save space
>can walk everywhere in the city, no need to drive
>actual things to do - coffee shops, restaurants, whatever because it isn’t just thousands of identical houses
>with all the space saved and no need for enormous roads, there is space for beautiful buildings/sculptures/museums etc
I’m probably biting the bait of a 16 year old euro

no you pick them up at the supermarket and you usually just have to say your name one time then they just hand you your stuff
>actually letting other people see you grocery shopping and judging you for your purchases

>Wanting to live by a convenience store where the homeless, invalid, and criminals loiter to buy cigarettes, booze, and lottery tickets.
NOPE!

>doesn't know that American cities have zoning so that there are separate residential and commercial areas
>tries to sound superior but just exposes the poor planning of European cities

just cut it before freezing it brainlet

Holy shit, this.
I won't go with her. Whenever I give her my card to go get groceries she makes stupid purchases and wastes money.
One time she spent 45 bucks to make one meal.

>walks

>One time she spent 45 bucks to make one meal.
What meal?

If the baguette has hardened, you can still make great garlic bread in the oven with it.

>go grocery shopping with wife
>realize that 25% of my grocery bill goes towards her makeup and hair/skin care products

Be grateful she takes care of herself.

Coffee shops and restaurants? Wow how exciting!

Living in the county master race.

Make up and skin care just hides her lack of care. Drink water, eat healthy and exercise thats all the skin care yyou need

>go to a supermarket that doesn't want to pay cart collector sped kids so they have that 'deposit 50 cents to take the cart out and you'll get it back when you return the cart
>don't return the cart, in fact leave it in an obnoxious place in their parking lot blocking two spots

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>character goes grocery shopping
>doesn't have an internal monologue debating the merits of just whipping his schlong out and rubbing it all over the produce
>doesn't go into the ladies' restroom and piss on the seats
>doesn't think to himself he won't buy beer but buys a case of Lone Star anyway
>doesn't think to himself he won't buy the fancy cookies but does so anyway
>says he won't live on frozen food and will actually cook something, buys stuff to make chili but also frozen pizza and just eats the frozen pizza every day
>doesn't repeat when the stuff to make chili goes bad

>cities
>not living in a country village
I have 4 pubs, local shop, and a decent driveway
and most importantly
there's no niggers here

Some gay shit like falafel. I was pretty mad. We could have had a decent meal out for that

>Living in a county
How uncivilized.

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Based cart pullers.

europe is so much more than cities you retard. no one likes living the cities, the push for over-urbanisation by ultra capitalists caused the rural exodus because all the jobs and investments went into the cities. Country side europe is much bigger and has more population than europe in cities, and everyone uses cars to move around without having to be under a constant cloud of smog

>everyone uses cars to move around without having to be under a constant cloud of smog
Your obsession with diesel road vehicles makes your claim suspicious.

What kind of poor nigger freezes bread. Its like 3 bucks a loaf i dont even know how much cuz its so cheap i never even look holy fuck.

Because I don't eat it fast enough to use a whole loaf before it goes bad. I'd rather not be out buying bread every 4 days. when it will last me 2 or more weeks.

>only carrying one bag
>paper

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This.
Plus, lots of bread you buy in the store is coming out of their freezer, because it basically lasts forever there.

kek

Do people really eat lettuce? It has zero nutritional value, no taste, no point whatsoever

Iceberg lettuce is shit. Buy redleaf or romaine. It actually has flavor and value.

it's really more covinient, always have bread at home, always good quality.
considering the countryside is poorer and diesel vehicules are more expensive and generally newer, from my experience, unleaded fuel is very prevalent in the countryside.
lettuce is based, lots of health benefits

>character goes grocery shopping
>doesn't start hating women more and more because they're so fucking stupid and stand 2 wide in aisles chatting and walk/into out of aisles without looking because they have zero fucking situational awareness which is also why they can't fucking drive for shit

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>implying your nigger infested shithole stores in the US are the same as in EU

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Wagie encounters the xanax house wife for the first time.

They're exactly the same except your scum have white skin and their teeth are in worse condition.

>character goes grocery shopping
>character is momentarily stunned by how cute the new clerk is and then feels mega awkward
>character goes home and feels lonely
These scriptwriters really know how to write.

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imagine having anxiety about approaching someone that works at a grocery store

>obese
>128lbs from an episode of my 600lb life being made about me
>always buy a TON of groceries, cakes, chocolate, chips, and other things like that
>couple of weeks ago was loading up on chocolates and chips in particular
>i have 'themed' shopping days, so one day i will only buy chocolate, chips and cakes, the next i will buy potatoes and vegetables etc
>not autistic but it is just too tiring to walk across multiple aisles so i stick to the ones close together
>often does mean I eat nothing but chips and cake for a few days but is made up for when i eat just potatoes, veggies, fruits and nuts for a few days (not fat because i am eating unhealthy just too much)
>carrying 5 plastic bags filled with chocolates, chips and other things, about 3 days worth in total (bare in mind this was all my calories for 3 days)
>one of the bags is so fucking heavy (it is the bag for chocolate bars, the other bags were for: plain chips, flavoured chips, chocolate cookies and chocolate cakes) that it ruptures
>packets of chocolate bars spill over the street
>panic, as I am not very good at bending over
>come up with a clever plan
>the bags of chocolate bars are rectangular
>think if I drop the bag of chocolate cakes onto the edge of each packet of chocolate bars, it will 'flip' up into the air, and I can catch it
>stand over a bag of bounty bars
>drop the chocolate cake bag on them
>just lands on the edge and crushes, nothing flips up
>cake bag falls and spills out all over the street
>starting to really panic in case someone sees
>decide to abandon the cakes and chocolate (over 40 euro worth) and go home
>still see some of the food on the streets now

why does this never happen in movies?

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kek

>universal healthcare
Even our criminals have better teeth care than you, freedom niggers.

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>using a manned checkout
>not using the self checkout
What is this, fucking 1995?

put in in the oven then the freezer for better results

What the fuck

>thousands of products available
>only buys and eats the exact same things everyday
Whats wrong with character?

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I don't go to the grocery store right down the corner and instead get in my car and drive across town because the one across town has self checkout and the one within walking distance does not.

>not fat because i am eating unhealthy just too much.

You bought 40 dollars worth of chocolate and cake to eat over a three day period you fat fuck. Also, fuck you for making me reply to your bait.

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there are plenty of small stores with a single checkout, retard.

If the sort of shopping you do is malt liquor and bacon, maybe

Oh no only 1 avocado! Oh the humanity!

>Californians

>character walks up and down deciding what to eat
>realises they have been in there for too long.

Why doesn't the character just know what they want?

youre standing by that small grocery stores literally don't exist or what, retard ?

Fuck your filename and fuck you

The more time you're spending worrying about what food to stuff down your face, the less time you have to focus on other stuff. Regimented, simple and nutritious meals are the best since they completely take the "what I am going to eat" question completely out of the equation.

>character eats nothing but weetbix for breakfast, bananas and coffee for lunch and rice with tuna for dinner

Seems kind of depressing to be honest. I bet his cum tastes awful too haha

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>character doesn’t lift up the back wheels of the cart for strafing.

This is some genuine autism in action

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>character goes grocery shopping
>doesn't place a pack of bacon in the halal section to piss of muslims with the result that the store has to rebuy the whole section

>character goes grocery shopping
>sees new attractive cashier
>pauses for a second feeling awkward
>mans up and uses her lane anyway
>she talks to character and is very smiley
>character feels good about himself and imagines life with cashier, trying to figure out how would be appropriate to ask her out
>goes back to the store next week with a plan in mind
>sees cashier outside sitting at the bus stop cuddling with boyfriend in the cold
>character has to hide the pain
Damn, what a weird scenario right haha like as if that's a realistic series of events so weird haha

>you need to use these cuck baskets or PAY some non-existent change to use metal ones
>you need to put your groceries in a bag YOURSELF
>everyone uses credit card even if they buy only pack of gum
>if you pay with 100 euros or up, the cashier literally checks if the money are fake right there and then in front of you

what the fuck is wrong with western europe and white """"""""people"""""""""""

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Not everyone lives in your backwater Nebraskan inbred bayou

Include me in the screencap

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i eat spinach instead

Lettuce tastes like bleach and soap. Patricians eat spinach and broccoli

SNAP gets you nearly $300 a month
A 10 lbs bag of black beans is $10
A 25 lbs bag of premium rice is $15
add a bunch of spices and low cost cheese you can eat like a king everday

Uh, yeah - how else do you boil water idiot?

man

It's impossible to tell if this is b8 or not because this is exactly what fatfags tell themselves in their retarded delusions
>oh I'm buying cake now, but it's fine, I'm buying vegetables tomorrow
>yeah I ate an entire chocolate cake today, but I also had 6 oranges so it doesn't matter
Just start counting calories. Everything you eat (vegetables, fruits, sauces and toppings all included) has a certain number calories. Add them all up and if you're exceeding 3000 a day, you're doing it very very wrong

>character doesn't enjoy eating
>is allergic to shitloads of stuff and doesn't like the taste of the rest of the stuff
>stands in supermarket for hours unable to figure out what to eat because he's bored of eating the same thing every day
>ends up buying the same thing again anyway

wrong.
It keeps for a couple of days and then if it hardens I can put it in soup to soften it

my SNAP got me $80 a month

reddit, the post

you're the worst, even worse than the fat nigger cart rider with her three kids, one riding on the back, yelling at the other two to get her stuff
you take up twice as much space as you should because you're an inconsiderate fucking frogposter. push the god damn cart like everybody else, aisles are too narrow and stores are too busy for you to pretend it's only you there

Weetabix is the most kino breakfast though

or how about you get a fucking job you lazy fuck

>doesn't buy 5 frozen pizzas, chips, a box of cereal and some lettuce so he pretend he's healthy

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I can't do that
I feel like I'd never know what shape my produce would be in.
What if all the apples are bruised??
I can't fucking eat bruised apples user I just fucking can't ok?

>hero carrying bag of groceries
>a leek is hanging out

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>character buys his usual junk food binge of Doritos and Dip, a tub of Ben and Jerry's, chocolate, sweets, cola
>picks up vegetables last to cover up the junk food

P-people don't really do this, do they?

Yes.

I don't know where you buy your baguettes, here in France they can be used as concrete for buildings if you keep them moret han one day.

>Do people really eat lettuce? It has zero nutritional value, no taste, no point whatsoever
none of this is true for Romaine Lettuce
Iceberg lettuce is the pleb's lettuce, fit only for fast food shitburgers

>character buys a crate of beer, two bottles of rum and 3 bottles of wine
>bert stares at the cashier when she jokes that he must having a party

so they somehow don't soften up if you put them in soup?
you frogfucks are doing something wrong, what are ya makin' them out of?

no you're just a fatfuck

>main character goes in to the shiny supermarket during evenings to feel less alone and to feel like he's in a Refn movie

It does but you can't keep them soft for a couple of days. After one day they're hard

name five movies

When I was younger my mother got about 240 bucks week for our 5-person family and we got by on it just fine. Where in the country are they only getting 29 bucks a decade later(this is ignoring that in every state there are programs to help those with young/infant children pay for groceries on top of SNAP).

If they want more food, then why don't they stop being lazy niggers and actually get a fucking job

that's when they find love usually

youtube.com/watch?v=fQrKIKuGIYY

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>Beans, rice and cheap cheese for dinner every day
>"Eat like a king"
Come the fuck on
Don't get me wrong, you can very obviously survive on SNAP, but let's not pretend it's actually comfortable.

/k/ and /ck/

They completely removed that function of the machines here. It was too stressful for the single staffer they had watching over 12 machines at peak hours

i get it :) because there's food and a gun there, and /ck/ and /k/ are the boards for cooking and guns, respectively, right? that's a really good joke :) thanks for sharing your wit and observation skills with us

>Don't get me wrong, you can very obviously survive on SNAP, but let's not pretend it's actually comfortable.
GOOD
It's not supposed to be fucking comfortable you fucking bum
It's supposed to discomfort you and give you the bare fucking minimum so you have an incentive to fucking find a job.
Oh that's a novel fucking idea isn't it? Getting a fucking job? You know, instead of bitching about the free shit the taxpayers give you?

>think if I drop the bag of chocolate cakes onto the edge of each packet of chocolate bars, it will 'flip' up into the air, and I can catch it
>stand over a bag of bounty bars
>drop the chocolate cake bag on them
>just lands on the edge and crushes, nothing flips up
>cake bag falls and spills out all over the street
jesus christ, the fat must be cutting off the oxygen supply to your brain

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I'm literally typing this from my break at work you massive retard, Yea Forums isn't one person.

>bragging about giving rapists and thieves free medical services

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I fucking wish Trump would have implemented the idea of cutting SNAP completely and shipping a package of bare essentials weekly instead of giving niggers free gibs to make them even lazier and so they can trade their cards for drugs
wow congratulations fuckwit I was hoping you were smart enough to realize I wasn't referring directly to you but to all the welfare babies that are dragging this country down

>character doesn't pretend the cart is the Titanic trying to dodge an iceberg

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I don't know if it should be the bare minimum.
You just know there are kids that are being fed on this shit and their parents are going to skimp out on anything healthy and nutritious.

Nothing, the character is based.

>>character doesn't drift his cart around the aisles while making tire screeching sound effects
I do that with my kids in the cart, and they get hysterical when I do that. Fun times.

No men and women should be moisturizing and exfoliating too

>Grocery store cashier puts light/fragile things in the bag first and then the big heavy things on top

They’re for carrying to and from your car

That's why I liked the idea of shipping families a box of non-perishable food a year ago
politico.com/story/2018/02/12/food-stamps-trump-administration-343245
Saves the taxpayers millions and people stop using their SNAP cards to buy fucking doritos
Yet, again, the idea of government welfare is not to let you kick back and not work and still live like a king, it's supposed to just support you so you don't starve and you still have an incentive to go out and find a job

Fuck you communist

what the fuck are you talking about?

the truth is most people on SNAP just buy junk food and/or they buy energy drinks to resell for cash to buy cigarettes

>character doesn't pretend that it is fighting against a possessed cart trying to hit other customers
>Yamete, cart-chan! Yametekure!

Exactly.
That's why I supported it a year ago when it was proposed that they ship a box of nutritious non-perishable food instead of muh SNAP card so they could buy cheetos and monster drinks
abc7news.com/politics/trump-administration-proposes-plan-to-replace-food-stamps/3077244/
Of course the niggers were outraged so it got dropped; oh the horror you don't get to pick the free food the taxpayers pay to get you it's like slavery and Jim Crow all over again

>character has a grocery cart
>gets a running start and hops onto the back like a scooter

I see that a lot. I also live in nyc so lots of things look straight out of a movie

>putting Catsup in the fridge

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Discord trannys can't work, just feel suicidal

all me

>veggies
Why do fat niggers always call them this. Top quality impersonation of a low iq lard planet.

cuck cart

Dumb statist cuck

someone answer this unironically
why the fuck would you not have handles

I once worked with a chemical engineer who had diabetes. Instead of taking insulin, he would instead eat five heads of romaine lettuce every day. It seemed to work for him.

see

hold me Yea Forums it's getting dark

The absolute mental gymnastics of a coping city slicker

Amerifat doesn't know that it's kinda healthy to walk sometimes. I'm 31 yo and never owned a car. I do have a drivers licence though. It is so fucked up to think that in your country car is some thing you have to have. No wonder you're all so fat.

Cold ketchup on a warm meal is kino

How does that answer anything? It's still inconvenient, and if you need more than one bag's worth of groceries, you're fucked anyway.

>mechanic character
>pops out from under open car hood and starts wiping hands with a chamois

>most people want to live in one spot
>a-all of them are wrong
>me living in an inbred village that nobody wants to go to is superiour because...
kys

why would having handles prevent that

amazing

youtube.com/watch?v=Xa23xIVfn30

Cope harder, urbanite.

> Character goes grocery "shopping"

> Doesn't just shoplift what he wants

basement suite

>I'm 31 yo and never owned a car.
This isn't something to brag about, you stupid girl.

>it's a tight fit
>could land a fucking jumbo jet in there

>things to do
>restaurants and coffee shops
These are things to do? This is just eating.
Things to do are like, riding a motocross bike around, going fishing/hunting, etc.

>not drawing with your finger in the glass of tha frozen isle

more like faguette am I right?

>character driving
>not listening to music

imagine being so fat you can't even bend over to accomplish simple tasks

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>fatties can't be funn-

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>going to a brand grocery store
>not going to some unknown mexican grocery store
>everything is cheap as shit, what costs 3.00$ at Safeway or albertsons costs 1.50 at pacos
>also for some reason the entire meat section is in russian

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Lmao I was in Europe for the first time last summer and I couldn't stop myself laughing when I saw those cuckcarts

21st century is about hedonism, user. You shouldn't have to get a job you don't like just to eat.

>also for some reason the entire meat section is in russian
>Tovarish, is meat
>'What kind?'
>Yes

Yup, same with mayo. Warm mayo is just vomit fuel

They have them in the US too, moron.

hot mayo on kebab is godly

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>lukewarm salty slime squeezed over horse gristle on a shitty wonderbread bun

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I would still push this in front of me tbqh

reminder that if you are a man going shopping and you can't carry everything you are buying in your hands only without basket or trolly support then you are a homosexual.
the only thing you are allowed a cart for is multiple sheets of 8x4 or more than one bag of cement/ballast. anything else if you can't carry it you don't deserve it.

When I was a kid I went grocery shopping with my Dad, dragged the cart and he got pissed about it. You end up going slower around corners, plus it's kind of a dick move if it's crowded. Being behind the cart gives you the smallest profile so it is less congested for yourself and others around you.