Gemchan

>Some fat gay kid sang a song
>now the empire is dismantled
>have to pay extra tariffs on off-world imports now
Why are the diamonds doing this?

DO IT.
Start era 4.

Wait won't we go extinct without them?

This but with Blue Diamond and her Pearl

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Fuck Pink, Fuck Steven and Fuck Earth!
And Fuck me for being able to say any of this without being shattered!

Fuck Era 3!

FUCK THIS SHIT I WANT MY EMPIRE BACK ! EVERYTHING USED TO BE PERFECT WE WERE THE MASTERS OF THE GALAXY UNTIL THAT FAT RETARD CAME AND HE EVEN DARES TO PUT HIMSELF ABOVE THE OTHER DIAMONS !!!? WHITE DIAMOND SAVE ME !

Ssssh shatter first, think later.

Hey guys Looking for Best Fusion Orgy

web://b3stfusion0rgy.gem

I just wanna be shattered.

Not unless we all get shattered.

Then go to diamond court tomorrow

Hey we got a 37 gem
Fusion going now anyone want to join?

Rather that diamonds can you hunt down this abomination?

Could be worse.
Pink Diamond could have married a nigger.

You gems sure are stupid.
Why don't you make a diamond that is so powerful that will restore your empire?
Sure it will probably take like a shitload of time for it to be born but hey it beats whining on an imageboard like the incels you are.

>just make a diamond
Fuck, why didn't we think of this shit, let me look up the recipe for making a fucking diamond.

>be me
>a fucking peridot
>a fucking kindergarten peridot
>be good at me fucking job
>everything is fucking great
>then one day a supervisor comes and tells us to basically fuck off
>literally fucking nothing after that for days
>this is my fucking life now

Fuck

oh my stars no

>Gems going full /r9k/ over humans
>All day
>Every day

Perform fusion gemcels

Today I ate something I thought was human candy.
I'm pretty sure I ate a peridot, an amethyst and a jasper
Am I gonna go to space prison?

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Doesn't even have to be a diamond. A bunch or deformed misfits held off yellow and blue on earth. Just get a bunch of quartz's together and start marching towards the palace.

Well how did the first diamond get made you fucking chipped ruby?
You can make more peridots, pearls and whatever the fuck, why not diamonds?
Fucking, even humans can make diamonds.

Boy the Earth sure is wierd, I have been there too see what the fuss is all about with it being the planet of muh Steven and once I got there I've meet this wierd human that kept following me around and telling me to stop watching something call porn , I don't even know what that is, and he also called himself Kristian I think. Strange place the Earth is .

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The Christ is basically the human's equivalent of The Steven... except let us just say that our "gems" weren't that keen on stopping their empire of bullshit and so literally nailed him on a cross.

>Fucking, even humans can make diamonds.
Oh yeah, since what we really need is unprogrammable Diamond that's so fucking tiny that an average amethyst wouldn't be able to even see them.

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Snake people.

And that's still a bigger achievement than everything you will ever do, you fucking ruby.

Oh yes ! He also told me about the human's "Steven" or how he called it A jew on a stick . But unlike Steven he sounded like a cool guy .

REMINDER that this Spinel is sitting on Pink Diamonds throne RIGHT NOW!

THIS COULD HAVE BEEN YOU!

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Imagine if The Steven instead of singing made a whip out of his belt and began hitting the diamonds until they fucked off their throne room.
That's what the Christ did.
Likewise, he could heal others and even survived its own "shattering", healing himself after three days.

So technically he is still alive and pretty much immortal, just not around to whip "gems" anymore... then again, we can't expect him to do all the work.

Yes but unlike Steven, Christ wasn't a faggot

I don't know about that, right before dying he was kissed a dude, that's pretty gay.

HEY GIRLS SOME GEM JUST SAID WE CAN FUSE WITH ORGANICS IS THIS TRUE?

Asking for a squadmate.

It sure is. Please fuse with me.

Well technically yes but you end up dying in the process.
Remember gems, when "fusing" with humans, don't create a womb... unless you want to bring another Steven into the world and nobody wants that.

nah it was a homie kiss and they said no homo

What are you crystalline fags gonna do about my house? A gem ship crashed through my ceiling and now I gotta go to home world to file a claim. I can’t afford space travel.

Sue them in an American court

BE GONE PINK THOT

I'm already tired of this shit.. gonna broadcast my shattering if i can figure out how to work this holo terminal

>We can destroy organics' homes and there's nothing they can do about.
BRB, gonna go get a cruiser and do a drive-by on earth,

I think we should start with this ((Stee-vhen) and see how things go from there. I heard that ((Stee-vhen) has some freaky abilities like sleep possession and can enter gems minds and shit...

There's a slight chance that the Diamonds would come to their senses if we kill him.

>work in a shitty general shop
>gems usually buy random amenities
>this include the most varied crap from cheap plastic toys to entire boxes of screws
>some even buy ungodly amounts of food which will get wasted
>they all got money so whatever I can deal
>one day a random Peridot buys some polishing wax
>no more gems coming to the store for a week
>strange but again whatever
>the week after
>holy shit
>about 20 gems in front of this shitty general store waiting for me to open up
>don't question it
>open up
>they all rush inside, fight over something
>they are all buying polishing wax
>they ask me if I have anymore in the back
>give them all the wax I have
>they ask for more
>I ask them what they need it for
>they go silent pay and fuck off
>mfw
Come on.

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You've been served. See you in US Federal Court.

Where DID we come from, anyway, if we're all made from Diamond fluid?? Who made the first Diamond?

Guys, I'm scared.

Are we really at such a new low that roleplay threads are a thing

This has been a thing for YEARS newfag. Have you ever seen imperium Yea Forums? Or the legion of doom threads we occasionally have and have had for the past 3-5 years?

Made by poor Africans

That's a good question, and I'm sure the answer is somewhere in the Archives. It may take a few centuries to dig up but I'm sure that the dedicated full time archivist gems can do their job and fin- OH WAIT.

what could it be for ?

"And do not think you can say to yourselves, 'We have Abraham as our father.' I tell you that out of these stones God can raise up children for Abraham."

"As it is written: "See, I lay in Zion a stone that causes people to stumble and a rock that makes them fall, and the one who believes in him will never be put to shame."

And also:

"The foundations of the city [of Heaven's] walls were adorned with every kind of precious stone: The first foundation was jasper, the second sapphire, the third chalcedony, the fourth emerald, the fifth sardonyx, the sixth carnelian, the seventh chrysolite, the eighth beryl, the ninth topaz, the tenth chrysoprase, the eleventh jacinth, and the twelfth amethyst.

And the twelve gates were twelve pearls, with each gate consisting of a single pearl."

Who here is surprised that the gate of Heaven is a Pearl?

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slut.

Sadistic fuckers went and made the foundations out of actual gems

Wait, if there is no one to work the kindergartens, how will gems be born? Human workers?

rip n tear

It's amazing how SU managed to make an already shitty board into even more of a shitshow. Yeah we get it, there was a movie and you saw it, now fuck off with this stupid gay ass show. Your general's in /trash/ for a good reason.

Depends: Did you chew?

Jealous.

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Former kindergarten Peridot here, the answer is NOBODY.

The kindergarten were shut down. No more injectors, no more anything. They told us to fuck off and closed the whole operation down and left everything as is.

That group of neo-peridots must be rather fucking confused once they surface from their holes in a few weeks.

I rather you know I had sex once with a male "guy" 6000 years ago.

Steven is hetero AF. christ however: not so much

They shattered in my mouth

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>we want to live up to the Yea Forums standard

Peridot here. Thinking of taking a ship full of spare kindergarten machines and fucking off out of the crystal gems reach, incubate my own gem army under the one and only ruling class the peridot.

Whose with me.

However...

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I can literally hear Agates pricking up their ears and saddling up.

Been nice knowing ya, my clod.

>implying agates, quartzes, or really any gem types have been doing their jobs since the start of era 3

Imagine if rubies actually landed on and colonised Neptune

It's not a job if you love it.

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Aquamarine here, just gonna let you know a few things about the eccentricities of the new laws in place over here since you retarded drones don't seem to be getting it.

1. When did anyone ever say that completely lifeless, uninhabitable planets were off limits for gem production?
2. Where the fuck did you get that idea?

I knew the new era gems were a bit substandard, but this is pathetic. Honestly, freedom is wasted on you retarded pebbles.

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Despire making up only 13% of the gem population amethysts make up 50% of all crime ..

God, all the threads on all the board are the same nowadays, WAAAAH ERA 3 BAD
WAAAAH, MOMMY WONT HOLD MY HAND AND TELL ME WHAT TO DO
WAAAAH
Don't you stupid fucking pebbles have anything better to do?

is this really human entertainment?
youtube.com/watch?v=WXIoWp92ux8&t=207s

>I'm a Ruby with my gem on my forehead. My whole existence is a contradiction.

I can't wait to go, what a relief!

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So why the heck do humans have so many different languages? I assume they speak gem because of our early colonies, but what about all those other gibberish mouth noises? Why haven't they weeded them out yet? How can any of them even manage to communicate with each other? Or do they not talk with each other at all?

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How can humans find such random imagery entertaining?
I look down at the comment section, and it seems that the humans were able to piece together stories from such random images, how is it possible?

Don't do it fag.

Look at these human "clown"!
We're look alike!

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How are new gems gonna grow on worlds where life is impossible? Just stick to enforcing, shorty and leave the Kindergarten stuff to the specialists.

Be a hero.

should we be worried about these guys
i went to look at the future with our reality engine and these fags showed up as well as humans? bros?

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Human here. If english came from gem then why did we only start speaking it 1400 years ago and in a form unintelligible to modern english?

Yeah, isn't it weird? I was walking around Earth for a while, and walked across some random river, and all the humans started speaking nonsense
I was scared shitless, I thought I might've cracked my gem, but no, I was just in "Mech-Sicko"

Because you guys weren't speaking it right, obviously. Makes sense you would only get it right now. You only had like four native speakers around. I couldn't imagine having to learn gem instead of just knowing it from birth.

Era 3 was a fucking mistake

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You're slow learners?

Did you see any of these? Talk about sick.

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Then what the heck is the Indo-European language family and why can english be connected with it. Did you guys originally speak PIE?

No I did not, but that looks "Metal AF" as the humans say

Actually, Zibarro ruby is a Good idea. No one would get her.

No? We've only ever spoken gem. And I don't know, I'm asking why you guys have so many languages in the first place. I can get slowly adopting gem, that makes sense as it's a pretty good language. But it seems like you guys just made new languages for fun at some point.

Hey gems, a human user here. Just use planets with no sentient life, just animals and plants.

Or just go to one of the many moons of Saturn or Jupiter. There's tons of minerals there.

No one -made- White Diamond.
She always was and always will be.
She was perfection.
I just wish the fucking ((Stee-vhen)) hadn't come in and completely ruined her mind and made her dismantle our entire way of life.
That fat flesh bag's messing up the natural order.
Have you seen how White, Yellow, and Blue get on their hands and knees and BEG for the ((Stee-vhen))?
It's fucking disgraceful.

>Be a Spinel
>Treated like a complete joke for three thousand years
>Don't mind much because at least gems are laughing
>Pink Diamond's Spinel shows up and nearly kills earth and the crystal gems
>Now gems only laugh at me out of nervousness
>Keep their distance from me
>Humans are outright terrified of me
>All of them think I'll snap soon
>No one's smiling anymore
I'm thinking of shattering myself.

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Emerald frigate captain here. Functionality isn't 100%, but I've patched into this frequency from my ship's terminal hub. My ship lost faster than light capabilities about 5870 years ago and we've been unable to restore them. We're approaching the Sol system right now to acquire repairs, I hope there are some peridots on standby.

What did we miss?

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What a dork. I mean seriously.

im an aquamarine and every1 is so annoying and stupid lol ...

our languages are almost directly correlated to where we are in the world, as well as when. indo European English vs American English, for example. it's not a stretch to say that language tells a story. when we look back at the logic and the words in our language, we are also looking out back into time, to get a better understanding of ourselves. gem may have been spoken once before on earth by indeginous humans ( indo europeans, whatever civilization was in the former landmass of Russia) but has changed to the point where-yes-it is spoken, but it is much more modular and has much more vernacular to it than gem did when it was spoken on earth.

I'd insult you in some fashion but we're in Era 3 so no one, not even the Diamonds, gives a shit about anything anymore.
Just do what you want.

Well no here's the problem. You guys had a colony here like 6000 years ago right? That's about when it's estimated PIE was spoken. But then somehow a branch of it seems to have evolved into the exact same language you speak. You'd think that if we got english from you it would be some sort of language isolate.

Speaking of Russia, what made the giant crater there?

considering the water, a lapis

Never relax, pebble

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This is a blue board!
At least have the decency to spoiler that shit.

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I wonder who could be behind this post

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When it was-you're speaking it right now! Our languages even easily translate, the only difference is the symbols! 27 letters right?!

Uh, we -need- the life energy from the planet to help make more gems, duh.
It's literally in our process.
A lifeless planet would be fucking useless.

Wait a minute. Did you colonize a planet full of giant insect like creatures that reproduce bursting out their host and are killing all other species?
It's that a Xenomorph?

Whatever, that's not my problem. Just make it work.

>Don't you stupid fucking pebbles have anything better to do?
Ever since Era 3, we literally don't.
Our colonies and armies have been disbanded, the Diamonds don't do a lot of traveling anymore.
A lot of gems are left without a purpose now.
Thinking about going to Little Homeworld on Earth to try and find....something. I dunno.

Fused with human for the first time day. AMA

why are you mad? modern english relies on vernacular.does modern gem have vernacular? like it or not, English is simply much more different from gem. if anything, gem is Latin.

..But the Metals are our mortal enemies!!

Look at that. Seems we have a fundie in our midst.

Ground Zero for the Diamonds' Annihilation Song, I think.

Liar. Fuck off Steven

You're all xenomorphs, what are you talking about?

That is so gross and degenerate. Disgusting.

Was it fun?

>gem is Latin
Except it clearly isn't. Really it just seems like english with a slightly reduced vocabularly.

LATIN CAME BEFORE ENGLISH YOU SHOULD KNOW THIS YOU WERE THERE

Did you shapeshift a fluid depositor or receptor.

I wasn't there, again I'm a human. But really that's my whole question. Why does it look like english evolved out of other existing languages here when it is pretty much identical to the gem language?

Hi guys, Rutile Facet-7H5L Cut-6AD
Reporting in.
I just shoot the weird creature . It is really similar to a gem. But acted
Human like before I crushed in to it. regular What should I? Should I bury it? What about the gem like components it poofed in to????? Help.

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It ain't pretty down here.
This isn't the Era 1 Homeworld you used to know.
Our colonies have been dismantled and our armies have been disbanded by Yellow Diamond.
Pink Diamond's been dead for 5000 years.
Gems are mixing and fusing all over the place.
And they've been letting ORGANICS associate with our kind.
All of this because of the one known as the STEVEN.
The Steven is an organic that somehow got Pink's gem inside of it and is now ordering around Yellow, Blue, and even WHITE DIAMOND.
The Steven is the one that told Yellow do tear down our colonies and armies.
It's also the one that's making gems and organics integrate with each other.
And because we're no longer going out to conquer planets and make more gems, a lot of our current gems have lost their purpose.
No more armies means no need for any of the combat gems to got to battle.
The Diamonds don't travel much anymore, so none of our navigation gems have anything to do.
Even some of the PEARLS have been relinquished from their masters and don't know what to do or where to go now.
It's all outta whack.
You can still land here if you want to.
But just be warned.
This isn't the Homeworld you remember.

what?

Because even in space they speak AMERICAN

It is really dark
I crushed it's "components" with a huge rock just to be sure, it could have reformed and attack meb , I think I'm completely safe now.

*GEM

Phew, you had a close one.

There are a lot of weird creatures creeping in the night .

How?

HEY GEMFAGS REMEMBER US????? YOU FAGS COLONIZED OUR ENTIRE WORLD???? HOLLOWED OUT??? LEFT TO ROT AND STARVE??? BUT WE HAVE FOUND SOMETHING BETTER NOW???? SEE YOU SOON.

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There's stuff going on you wouldn't believe.

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There's some guy Weyland who is trying to go to your planet because he thinks you're our creators.
He wants to meet the "engineers"

You're cracked, soldier

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I don't know, it just happened. It was some puffy kid.

'Engineers' rings a bell.

Big white guys?
Even more disgustingly organic than you guys?

Gross.

>puffy kid
oh no
he got another one

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>implying
we have human walking around with robotic arms, robotic legs, robotic ears, micro robots in our blood, valves in our hearts. we're already more machine than man

Why would gems that are high-class enough to have a Spinel be worried about one that almost destroyed such a weak planet? Honestly the fact that she failed makes it even more pathetic.

What are you talking about? What is this frequency? Are you cracked?
Further data transmission from your address has been blocked and a report has been filed. Do the galaxy a favor and wipe that image from your memory crystals.

You guys should be grateful that the Steven has breing peace and love to your morally corrupt empire.
He is the "son", an organic concept meaning he is half Pink Diamond yet does not share her conciousness, of Pink Diamond after all and a true saviour of Gem kind.

>that trip
we dont need your sympathy, xenos.

>worshiping a jew

She uh
She took a picture of this Smokey

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I was a Spinel for a huge ship, so I got to make everyone there happy. Then I was let go because of Era 3. I just made anyone I found happy until they became afraid of me.

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Humans Steven was a jew too, coincidence? I think not

Most humans worship jews one way or another

damn that's tuff
>tfw the only peridot on a ship full of high level quartzes, agates, rubies, and their pearls
>the pearls and rubies i can handle, at least they're useful
>the agates and quartzes are completely retarded, not getting how even the most simple microwave engine or NLS drive works
>stuck on a ship with LITERAL BOOMERS
what were they thinking putting me here

Why? Is it because I drove a "truck"? Isn't that allowed?

Why is anyone scared of a spinel for activating an injector?
Shit my quartz, Peridots do that shit all the time.
Or, used to, anyways.
That ain't special.

reminder that steven never hugged spinel

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Is it ok to molest?

depends, are you on earth? if yes, where. if no, yes.

>My Quartz
>Not "My Ruby"

I think it is ok. Semen Universe has confirmed it. We are free to do whatever we want, unless we hurt someone.

I accidentally spoiled the plot of a game using future vision, how do I unsee it?

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gives me conniptions

I wanna see the full thing

You can't
Shouldn't be using future vision while consuming media dumbass

Bitch, you're not supposed to look at the game, you look at your future self and see if you liked it so you know whether you should play it.
This is basic stuff.

Rub your eyeball real hard. And try looking down. It should reset after 10 Earth minutes.

So I am an Obsidian and for some reasons a bunch of guys in white robes tried to beat me up yesterday.
Made me actually poof but when I came back they were all gone and a burning cross was standing on someone's yard.

Did I get attacked by what the humans call ghosts?

>Earth minutes
Use the Gemetric system you Ruby.

They're actually all part of a bigger organism that the earthlings call a /pol/.

Well that is just great.
I am a Spinel who came to earth just for a visit and all of sudden this guy came to me and told me I get sued. Said something that my shape is too similar to some guy called Michael Mouse or something.

As they say" When in Rome, do as theRomulans do.
You, you- yo- Sodalite.

Just slap him

Fellow gems, did you know that this one place called Africa is filled with Concretes?

Though I should add, something must have gone wrong as they came out of the kindergarden. Many of them are rather "malnourished" as the humans say.

those are just dark humans. pay them no mind

I'm not crying, there is " morning dew" in my eye.

>Actual confirmed Ruby
>Living on earth and went native
Did you get corrupted too? Cause that's the only way this gets worse.

Stfu you stupid cunt.

Did you guys hear of the Saphire who was arrested on charges of scamming people on sport bets?

>be me
>be farther
>lose my son to gems
>find out he lived in a human zoo
>get you see my son again after 14 years
>he's gay and likes to take it up the ass from Gems
fucking gems killed my son, race war now.

the Vex are fine ut i don't like the look of them Hive.

...But aren't Bismuths basically metals?

Yes, you got me, I am actually a Ruby . What's your excuse?

Fuck off /gempol/

Bismuth is not basically a metal. It is a metal.

And pearls are organic, what's your point?

Falseflag, all the humans from the zoos first generation have long since died of old age
Go back to your human image boards meatbag

And diamonds too
>the_100%carbon_face.jpg

Gals, I found a peridot crying in a closet about how this other peridot she wanted to fuse with got HUMAN'd
Wat do?

What's our opinion on pictures of uncut gem sill in the ore?

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In Era 2 I ran over a glow-in-the-dark Diamond nigger with my roaming eye. Score one for the good guys.

Can you repeat that, except y'know, make it an actual coherent thought?

>puffy kid
>that THING claimed another victim
I'm so sorry.

SAUCE!

>Are you cracked?
I wish I was, but I'm afraid I'm telling the truth.
Gems and Organics are allies, now.
This is an image taken from Little Homeworld, a small gem colony where organics are free to enter as they please.
There are gems that -want- to mix and mingle with lower lifeforms.
This all because of the Steven, the tiny organic hugging the Bismuth.
It wanted all of this to happen.

Times are changing, and for the worst I'm afraid.
Hope you have a safe trip home.

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Gems have no need to "give it up the ass" as you organics say.
If your "son" is taking anything up the ass from anyone it's another organic.
You filthy creatures shove things inside one another all the time.

Here's an artistic rendition of the Crystal Gems.

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Are you gems so mentally damaged that you think freedom is a bad thing?
Seriously, how stupid can you be: we humans are stuck in this craphole with YOU space lesbo CUNTS and all the rejects that Granda Adolf should've terminated long ago, meanwhile you retards are capable not only to live forever but to live whenever wherever no matter what.

You don't even need food or air, why the fuck are you sticking around?
A damn Lapis was capable of FLYING repeat FLYING with wings made of WATER which make ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE TO MY POOR HUMAN MIND back to your fucking homeworld... and you're Era 1 or whatever?

We humans never had any real guidance, we're always fighting each other nonstop yet we can dig our own little gardens of happiness, we still fuck, we eat, we shit and every morning we wake up, just the same, as we have done as monkeys we do now as homo sapiens.
You meanwhile are invincible yet cannot function unless someone literally lords over you, how pathetic is that?

Times are not changing: things have always been bad anywhere.
Only now you are responsible for your own action, you can no longer play dumb or just "follow orders".
Welcome to adulthood, pebble, enjoy your stay.

Please stop mixing organic terms into your speech, you're going native.

>implying
you gems cant into philosophy or relativism.
what's to say we are lower? how do you know that you aren't the low one? what's to say we're organic? what is organic? these are questions even a human that's been around for 6 years would ask, yet you haven't seemed to gather answers for them in the millennia you've been around. tat's what separates us, gem. we are capable of individual thought. given your lifespan we could far out work you. an eternity to live is an eternity to think- such is our curse.
also Steven isnt really organic, rather, he is just another cog in pink diamond's machinations. if you want this to stop, then you would first need to figure out pink diamond's plan, dismantle it, and continue with whatever manufactured purpose your machine god gives you, i suppose.

Cute

Yeah but human fucking die after like 80 to 100 years or so, and they can keep themselves busy by trying to find organic supplements and stuff so they don't die sooner than that (why they bother is beyond me).

The point is who cares what fucking organic time-measurement organisms think, you (as an individual) will be dead before you have a chance to be bored.

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you are literally born from taking the life from other beings. you literally are millions of lifeforms that never got the chance to be. you are a dead thing, made by a dead power, in the shape of the dead.

MOOOOOODS!

That's bullshit, you're bullshit.
Boredom?
So far you were following a military life, going where you were told, controlling equipment, being a literal pawn.
You have freedom now, you can do ANYTHING... yet that somehow is boring?

You know what my primitive biological mind thinks?
My primitive biological mind thinks that boring creatures live boring lives.

user, please, this is a blue board!

They’re basically figureheads at this point. It’s the traditionalists we need to worry about. The last thing we need is another revolution or coup attempt.

Me first, please

But... what about my xenopregnancy fetish?

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Watch for that thing that calls itself a Garnet.
Whenever it sings there's a 100% chance that it'll win whatever fight it and/or the ((Stee-vhen)) are partaking in.

so much this
gems can out run or out fight us, but they cant out think us clearly. if i were steven, the first thing i would do is leave my gems to their own devices, and tell them to think of something, anything.

You will get to enjoy it once.
Then die.
Or rather, reincarnate I guess.

Bonus points: chances are that we create a new human/gem hybrid, start a new empire made of super soldiers and start the whole conquering the galaxy all over again.
Imagine a race of immortal creatures that can shape shift, create weapons, fuse with pretty much anything and (most important) overthrown Steven.

>you (as an individual) will be dead before you have a chance to be bored.
I'd rather take than than being bored out of my mind forever.
I'm a Pearl that got relinquished from my Hessonite that told me "I'm free to do whatever I want now".
I've spent most of my days starting at the walls but no one's told me to leave yet.
Maybe the humans don't have it so bad.
At least they can make their own purpose.

Ever since Steven took Pink Diamond’s throne he’s been in the pool chamber with a harem of Spinels and Pearls for a quite a while now...

>every kind of precious stone
>Ruby isn't listed
HA! TAKE THAT FUCKING RUBYFAGS!

Well, fortunately for you, there's a myriad of ways to go out
You can shatter yourself
You can wait for a mass shatterer to get you
Or you can "fuse" with a human and reincarnate
Take a pick, friend

You want a new order?
How about "find your purpose in life"?

Don't worry, if anyone ask you can tell them it was an advice from a dumb human, you know, so you don't have to take responsibility for your own actions.

Why can't we just colonize worlds without any sentient life? Unless the Steven is an even bigger hippie than I gave her credit for and wants to protect ALL forms of life, not just sentients like the humans and stuff.

That seems fake, I se- I mean my friend sees him all the time on little homeworld and he never warps out of Earth

Oh, yeah, yeah, super powerful hybrids, yeah... how opposed are humans to using restraints on their prey- er, mating partners?
To ensure proper fusion, of course.

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I hear there is a culture of humans who enjoy being tied down during mating
Quite fascinating

Whats the point of anything now? Do we just do nothing forever?

go on a starline cruise, that's what i did. me and some buddies from Io decided our engineering days were over for a bit, and decided to go on a cruise to Andromeda. met a pearl there too, said she belonged to an agate and just had to see the constellation she was always talking about.

>born too late to fight for the empire
>born to early to know peace with the universe
>born just in time to be unemployed and shitpost on /gem/
L-Living the dream, guys...

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I'm pretty sure if you ask any male human to fuck they will follow you anywhere.
Females may be picky... unless they figure out that you're outbreeding them, then they will get starved for sex as well.

nigga moment

I'm pretty sure he meant also organic life, you know, plants and animals. Apparently PD was very fond of them and since Steven has her gem...

Mods, please ban the human trash clogging up the threads

pain is a good metric for sentience. did you know that plants feel pain?

Absolutely plebian fetish.
Only patricians can appreciate the pleasures of being dominated by a lower species

Sure seems like it.

Although I did hear about this colony that now produces only weapons since they got nothing else to do, may give it a try.

Hey, if we go colonize a planet without sentient life, and no one is around to perceive us doing so, then are we really breaking any rules set by The Steven?

What a retard, organic life is all over this galaxy yet this ones are so intriguing to her

>literal gay rocks colonized the entire known galaxy
>all organic life in the galaxy that isn't from earth is gone, never to be discovered
>earth was a plaything of a literal child before being the battleground for a rebellion that did fuck all
>exploration of the galaxy is no longer an exciting endeavor, nor is it a possibility
>our species survival is based on the whims of 3 giant old hags, and one fat teenage boy who can't even put up a fight
>space colonization is now a bigger pipe dream than it previously was
>gay rocks coming to earth in droves for some reason, probably to finish what they started
>humanity will never become a great species, merely a plaything for a bunch of gay rocks
>humanity will never interact with other alien species

Thanks a lot rockfuckers for ruining all of existence for us, now that we're at the behest of a bunch of old hags that can't even say no to a pubescent boy. We can't even be certain that our existence is guaranteed given how much you despise anything that has a pulse and are flooding earth with your kind. Yet you know what's really interesting? The fact that you look down upon us yet you are the galactic equivalent to a leech. You need organic energy to survive, sterilizing everything in the process, and without it, you can't sustain yourselves. It's really funny that you consider yourselves superior to us yet can be compared to the lowliest earth creature. Hope you wake up to that, or don't. I don't care anymore. Good luck with Era 3 fucking up your oh so precious hierarchy.

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Hey stone, Spinels are no joke. They seem all bubbly and fun but I'm of my unit pissed one off once and for laid out. She was a Jasper, a fucking Jasper and she got pounded by a giant fist.

Why do we even target organic planets when most planets are inorganic?

i feel you brother
a quartz hit me for being in the way at a home depot. these fucks think they can do what ever they want with no consequences

Why do pearls tend to sell feet pics to humans?

Tell you what, let's finish this discussion in a century.
OH WAIT, YOU ORGANICS LITERALLY JUST DROP THE FUCK DEAD FOR NO REASON IN LESS THAN 100 YEARS.

It's called Facet Five, Humanigger

...? I was just noting an interesting trend amount humans, I have no attachment to such degeneracy
You however, seem to have gone full degenerate. I would report you to a nearby Quartz but >Era 3

GIMME HUMAN DICK

I DON'T FUCKING CARE IF IT KILLS ME

I NEED ORGANIC COCK

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Because we literally need the "life-force" shit for our incubators. They will literally not work without it as they need it to form a proper functioning gem.

They are amalgations of microscopic stuff called cells which are products of temporary chemical reactions. As time passes the reactions damage the cells organics call this aging and once too damage occurs they die. Such is the fate of the inferior biological lifeform.

become a 'praw-sit-toot', I hear that's how humans get plenty of sexual interaction, and they even make currency from it.

Why not just synthetically create lifeforce then?

YOU ARE MADE OF THOSE CELLS YOU BLOCK HEADED, RED SKINNED, LITERAL 3 FOOT TALL WOMANLET

What gem are you?

Gems are composed of an array of circuits not cells thats why our cores cannot regenerate.

QUARTZ MASTER RACE

I think the diamonds have their heads in their asses at this point.

Wow, how original. The old mortality joke. Haven't seen that post ever. You gems really are a bunch of unoriginal fucks. .

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take her to earth to get human'd too.

>Why not just synthetically create lifeforce then?
If you know how to create this life-force shit that we need in sufficient quantity then please go tell the diamonds about if that the steven thing about it.

life force is literally just carbon, and carbon is an organic compound. you are organic in a roundabout way.

HUMANS LEAVE
MODS

I asked her if she wanted to get to earth, and she started blasting me with her limb enhancers
I think that might be a 'no'

Gems are composed of mostly metal and oxygen not carbon.

Call me at 895-1886-METROCITY, we can hook up.

>life force is literally just carbon
err... no.

As the humans say, anything's legal as long as you don't get caught.

Is our caste system retarded? I mean think abour it why is an Aquamarine high ranking if it has no defined purpose.

>QUARTZ
Why am I not surprised...

what's that? a human reproductive rod?

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They're being led around by the ((Steven)) and do everything his heart desires in order to keep any reminder of Pink Diamond alive.

I AM SICK OF THIS SHIT WE FUCKED UP OUR EMPIRE BECAUSE OF SOME SLUTS AND SOME FAGGOT KID !???
FELLOW IMPERIAL GEMS LET US UNITE IT TIME FOR THE RACE WAR !

I think their general purpose is task management and oversight, also they are rather powerful so there's that.

私は知りませんが、多分この異なる言語を使ってスティーブンを混乱させ、有機物を再び破壊できるかもしれません

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>you will never be a personal humie pet for a big strong perfect gem

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They job to Topazes.

Do I need to shapeshift into a slimmer form to attract human males? I'm a Jasper so I'm pretty swole, but all the images of human females I've seen that human males seem to find titillating show them as much small but with large milk sacs on their chests. Do I need to slim down or just shift bigger milk sacs?

>attract human males?
why do you want to do such a crime against gem nature?

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Bigger milk sacs, there are plenty of humans who like the swoleness. Like this one, apparently:

>imagine wanting a human

This post was sent by master race,
Our sex bots are way better than any of your pearls can ever be

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Apparently thanks to the Steven I have a "break" which means I have to spend time not making beautiful structures. Bismuth here I hate this Steven thing so much.

Imagine having to resort to calling the mods just to get rid of a bunch of "meatbags". It really does show how mature you 1000+ year old rocks are.

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What else is one to do?
Follow one of the pipe dreams of some wannabe diamond and attempt some pathetic resurrection of what once was?
Take the black diamond, embrace the degeneracy

I see. Upon further research I would be what humans refer to as 'thicc'. Is this correct?

N-no, I refuse, I won't fall to degeneracy! I won't!

From my research, 'thicc' seems to suggest softness and squishyness. I believe the appropriate human term for a Jasper's body type is more likely to be 'Amazonian'.

They've always been nothing more than servants. Now, they simply serve a more demeaning cause.
Probably nothing new for them

I don't speak Meepmorp

>Irkfags beliving they're smart
daily reminder our diamonds are taller than your self-claimed "Tallest"

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Lol, have sex gemcel.
Oh wait

and so The Steven, that's the plan

>irkfags
come get your failed invader

Even most of our Quartzes are taller than than the Irklet "Tallests". Pathetic.

I spend the last 200 years fighting the Dalek empire alongside fellow Jaspers in order to take over a new colony for Yellow Diamond.

And now I am letting go because of an insignificant "human" who is the bastard son to the greatest traitor in our empire's history?
Screw the diamonds.
I am defecting towards the Freeza Empire now

Poyo!

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you know, I am going to find you. And then we have the discussion. While I am going with a drill at your precious gem.

As a Lapis Lazuli Im very attractive to human men and women but all I want to do is remove their blood, and also remove that disgusting ocean on Earth. Liquid coverings are the insignia of inferior organic life.

A Pearl alone can rip your head off stupid human.

Have fun being exploded by a moodswing ridden emperor, I guess

hi gems i´m a blue quartz and I have something strange to tell...
I went to the diamond's palace yesterday and when i got into the regeneration room i saw blue and yellow diamond joining its lips....it was super gross...sudenly they fused into a green abomination.. i was in shock ..then i was poofed by someone...it was very strange....i think i will tell white about this...

Era 3 is so great

It's Era 3 you clod, don't bother

Hey, Gem-scum...
we have the technology
youtube.com/watch?v=fkPPkDwH9NA

Ai jos a liito row b hu ned perpo na

Oh yeah, grab one of those human spaceships that can make it to homeworld.
Oh wait.

dumb gem now we all know

DELET THIS

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Guys I'm confused. I was vising earth and saw this little human that was so cute, so I reached down and tried to give him a hand job, but he freaked out and ran away screaming 'BAD TOUCH' over and over again. I don't understand, the humans at the Zoo always loved it when I did that.

And I'll be telling that joke long after you're dead.
That's what makes it funny.

Andy cope

>attracting organics
Where's that user with the Breaking Point?
I think I found some new fodder to use it on.
Me.
Fuck Era 3.

it didn't manage to do so last week, after I threw acetic acid into its gem.

>ywn demonstrate human reproductive practices

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we have laws here gem, enjoy prison

Are you that cubic Zirconia who got "held down" and "forced" by a Zooman?
Man, you've really changed you filthy clod

Please don’t tempt fate, I’ve foreseen multiple futures where humans go full uh, what is that fictional construct, ah yes, “Mechanicum of Mars”. It is not pretty to say the least.

>he just killed a cute and petite 5 ft tall White Diamond

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silly gem.
We now have warp pads.
And something called nuclear bombs.

MOOOOOOOOOOOODS

We don't need Diamonds to make injectors.

Hot. Please shatter me daddy.

You are on one planet we are on billions. One nice asteroid would end you.

That's a sapphire user you dimwitted ruby pebble

That is nothing. Look what I did to a Pearl

youtube.com/watch?v=-fyhYi5vsng

Can cracking your gem be enjoyable?

>be me
>amethyst, was a guard till the fat kid ruined everything
>pretty good-looking, not too tall, often described by humans as "thick" or "shortstack " or something to that effect.
>bored last night like every other night
>a pearl keeps bragging on gemchan about how "easy" it is to fuse with humans and how their males "can't keep their hands off of her"
>fuck it, install the human mating app
>follow some examples to take some "hoe pics"
>damn, I look good
>start flicking through potential mates
>some of these humans are actually pretty appealing
>some are even downright gorgeous
>wait three hours, maybe 3 matches
>guy one "doesn't actually date gems, just thought i was doing a 'cosplay'"
>guy two is game, but his female mate is over
>suggest we just all fuse, but "she doesn't 'swing that way'"
>fucking weirdos
>guy three sends a picture of his torso
>fucking hell, thought humans were supposed to be soft
>diamonds.jpeg
>send one of my own
>little bit of a belly, but figure he'll be into it
>"lol, no fat chicks"
Fuck this whole gay ass earth.

Wow omg its so nice to be here, Im a pebble which is a gem too we just spend forever in Pink Diamond's room.

I’m not a human but I can understand the confusion, I’m just a sapphire who likes to look down more unlikely paths and there are a disturbing few where human sentience reaches a critical mass and something happens. I don’t exactly know what but I’d prefer to keep good relations with humans just in case.

Malarky we can kill their entire species with one vial from the Citrine labs.

Salutations, what was it like to care for the illustrious Pink Diamond?

I fear that they, uh, might not be entirely quarantined to one planet

Don't rmeind me of her.
Seriously, Pink Diamond back before she got her colony was like the one your species refers to as the Paris of Hilton.

Uh... Human here... I am uh... was doing crystal and I um... I think I crushed up the gem of a white quartz soldier who had come by to party and snorted it while I was high... What should I do? My fucking nose is burning and I left half of it in the mortar and pestle I don't want to go to jail fuck me

Careful, now creepy humans are going to ask you to "step on them" and be their "GF" on gemchan now
OF COURSE THIS WOULDNT BE AN ISSUE IF MODS DID THEIR WORK

Has anyone here tried a reproduction simulation with a human? What is it like?

She cried alot and used to beat the shit out of her Pearl. Sometimes she would go on about how much she hates the diamonds and how she would start a war in her colony just to piss them off lots of jokes I say.

we breathe oxygen retard. literally NO OTHER PLANET in our immediate vicinity has oxygen, and steven is the only human that can survive on homeworld without aid

She's talking about the zoo you stupid meatbag

I think those break things are optional.
For gems anyway.
Humans and their inefficient bodies need them, but I think we're allowed to keep working whenever we want.
If he says it's break time just ask him it's alright if you keep working anyway, I'm sure he'll understand.

The zoo is a nonfactor.

Wait, breathe? Humans breath!? How the fuck do they deal with it?! What if they go into space!? Or under water!? Or just cover their face up!?

Uhm maybe, think a little bigger than “in your solar system”

Who is this moot and why I feel sad when I hear about him ?

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It really sucks down here in the underworld. Heard HW is changing but we are still down here.

i met a zooman
bunch of inbred degenerates, how did they get so tall tho?

You should probably come up and take your place as the new ruling class

Oh come on, who are you trying to impress at this point?
Everyone knows the diamonds are already out fusing with every human of prominence they come across.
Our leadership are a bunch of heathens, our morals have become loose to the point of total obscurity, and a fat child is orchestrating the reconstruction of society.
Getting gangbanged by a bunch of hairless apes is a social obligation at this point.
(Look it up, I know you garnets pretend to have "absolutely no idea" of what that is)

Guys, a Peridot working in the palace here.

I think we have a problem.
I just heard rumors that White, Yellow and Blue have officially resigned as leaders of the gem empire. Supposedly they want to live on earth with the Steven now and are hitching up their space ships.
Yellow and Blue Pearl are already freaking out at having been declared the new rulers of Homeworld.

Are you sure they aren't just moving the capital and their throne to Earth?

I wish I could but the drones down here are still vaporizing our gems.

>have some lower lifeform shoot some genetic snot inside you once
>fucking die
Truly the master race

>be era 1 amethyst
>be soldier fighting for the empire’s glory
>get poofed for some reason
>end up bubbled
>get woken up
>it’s fucking era 3
>find out my diamond is dead
>cry
>get in ship to go find my new purpose
>crash on random ass planet
>local organics ask why I’m crying
>say my diamond is dead
>fuckers just respond with “so it goes”
Fuck organics and fuck era 3

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I aint listening to no Pearl. I nominate Zircons as our new supreme leaders

Try yelling at the drone that its era 3, worked for me desu.

trafalmidor is full of vapid nihilistic fucks who keep humans in zoos. i hate them.

Is it weird that I'm kind of turned on?

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N-NO STOP
I WONT
I WONT I SWEAR I WONT
STOP

Are you retarted? Zircons are suffering from what the humans call the assburgers.
There is a reason why we locked all the zircons up.

I beseech thee, gems more knowledgeable on human matters, I am a lowly pearl stationed on a repair cruiser stationed in sector 46-B. I was minding my own business and keeping the ship clean when a human seemingly popped into existence in front of me, it seemed very distressed but before I could interrogate it my cleaning utensils opened the airlock, most likely shattering it. I’m concerned that The Steven May come after me. I drew a rough outline of what it looked like.

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It's Era 3, they don't care anymore.
If the ((Steven)) deems it appropriate then the Diamonds won't care.
Let them go.
They're not the perfect beings we used to know anymore.

Sorry sis, you're fucked
The Steven just KNOWS when you hurt humans

Naw s'cool. You're fine.

don't worry, you'll see him again alright.

I'M REPORTING THIS TO THE DIAMOND AUTHORITY TO SO THEY CAN SEE WHAT YOU SICK FUCKS ARE DOING.
I don't care if it's Era 3 they've gotta do SOMETHING.

Depends if you're willing to share or not

Better than these worthless diamonds.

Era 2 fags like you are why I can't get laid.

Any of you gems see this 'Ninja Warrior' show these humans like? It's suppose to be this obstetrical course but it looks like it's made for babies. Like seriously, even an Era 2 Peridot could finish this in like half the time any of these 'top tier humans' could do it.

Look what we do to your rubies

youtube.com/watch?v=u9JJet8JzgI

Not at all. this is era 3, wanting to be gangbanged and then shattered by hairless meatbag apes is perfectly normal. Why, I'm planning to have myself shattered and my remains ground into powder so my human lover can snort them, permanently making us one.

When I got angry at them they just told me that I “couldn’t see the bigger picture” they then went on about how gems actually look like centipedes and I’m just too “primitive” to see it. Fuckers also said that Pink Diamond’s death was caused by nothing and meaningless, and how that’s apparently ok
What a bunch of assholes

>gem getting frisky with organics from the zoo
Fuck, you're that Cubic Zirconia I heard about from the Aquamarines a few days ago aren't you?
I knew you weren't "pinned down", you actively went after the zoomans.
You better be lucky this is Era 3.
The Diamonds would've shattered you on the spot in Eras 1 and 2.

Fuck it.
I'm going to say it, i will never fucking accept St*ven as authority i don't give a fuck what the other diamonds say if they're going to follow the word of that organic lipid filled little excrement.
I've already stolen a ship and have gems and gem production technology with me i don't care i will make my own homeworld and become my own Diamond and if Steven chooses to interfere with me i will just shoot him or something.

Stars i fucking hate Steven.

So lets discuss which gem classes need to destroyed now that the empire is over.

Ameythst
Ruby
Sapphire
Topaz
Pearl
Rutile

Any others?

>have to get in close to even attempt to use it
>have to hold it directly to the gem for it to work as intended
just get a gun lmao

I think the weirdest thing about the humans for me is this entire "gender" thing.
Recently some guy called me out for saying "good morning, human being" instead of "good morning, sir"

Well humans are like babies, they obviously don’t have the benefits of being designed for specific purposes like us, actually that does raise a question what were we created for in the first place, it would make sense if we were a weapon of war we do seem predisposed to that sort of thing.

PERIDOTS RISE UP

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It's just all dustposting in here.

Resistance is futile

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Era 3, everyone.

Oh you think you have it bad, being with the humans huh
I’m stranded here with a bunch of crazy hand things that keep saying that they have seven sexes and apparently according to them... GEMS HAVE NINE
I honestly can’t make this shit up

Reminder that The Steven loves you all and there’s nothing you can do about it

Good morning, Gemfolk.

My name is Stan, I am a humble human farmer from Wisconsin and I want to ask you about something.
See, recently I wanted to get some new equipment for my farm, because it is corn harvest soon and I got this fancy looking scythe from what you guys may refer to as an antique store? Anyway, I used it, but it did not cut through my corn at all.
However, when some Jasper I hired for help touched it, it instantly poofed and now refers to me as its master.

What the heck did you guys give me?

Lapis are made to kill organic worlds and now they cant even do that so destroy them as well. I think Zircons are pointless too.

You monster

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oh stars, oh fuck. some of these round things crashed onto my colony and then some human looking things got out and started shooting lasers and blowing everything up, then at night they turned into giant animals and are destroying everything and killing everyone
oh stars fuck fuck fuck what do i do?

Attached: saiyan pod.png (576x432, 232K)

Remember the Stogg?
What a bunch of clods
Stroyboys need to sustain themselves by drinking an organic slurry of something entirely more vile than anything a human could concoct

Good luck. I reported a peridot fusing with two humans on a public beach about 3 days ago. They told me to quit being "jealous" and stop "wasting their time."
We're absolutely fucked. Thanks Steven, you absolute degenerate.

>getting rid of the ones that can literally predict the future
It's like you WANT the empire to lose it's military edge.

wait no, i need a zircon so i can sue homeworld for my roof

oh god, we made a mistake sparing the humans. now theyve surpassed us and are coming for us. the diamonds tried to warn us all.

What if I shattered the Steven?

Sapphires are useless now.

Hello I’m that far seeing Saphire from before, please don’t

Can you even shatter a human?
How do you do that?

Last week I saw one of the organic on this star forsaken world give birth
It literally just popped into existence
FUCK THIS PLACE
Please for the love of the stars... can someone please get me off this planet

Answer:
give him diabetes.

they do it to themselves all the time. they made something something called a "ba omb" and they blow into a million pieces.

Just hit them really hard in their head.

>Wanting to get pozzed by a human
What's wrong with you clods? I bet you fuse with corrupted gems too.

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I, for one, welcome our warm, soft overlords and offer myself as tribute to their victory.
It's a truly heroic sacrifice, I know. But someone will have to sate their desires.
Oh well~!

*autistic wiggling*

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Obsidian Soldier QVC-354 here.
Has anyone heard anything of a giant injector with a few thousand gallons of bio poison floating around?
I was just taking a break from my position and when I came back all I found was a giant hole in the warehouse I am stationed at.
Also, there were rose petals all over the place

You clod we have bombs too, are you defective?

I don’t think this would work on a diamond, you dumb ruby

Are you hot? What kind of gem are you?

Dumb gem poster, it was specially designed to shatter a diamond, any respectable Bismuth would make it able to go much farther than that as to make up for any possible miscalculation.

That sounds really twisted >:)

You guys need an engineer?
I'm a recently-out-of-commission Peridot that could use some work.

Even if we disregard military applications future sight is still excellent for predicting workplace accidents and thus being able to avert them ahead of time, or being notified of a task you are required to perform before your supervisor even decides to make you do it

Listen here you clod. Humans are just the top of the asteroid when it comes to organic fuckery
Unlike you I’m trapped on a spinel world full of apathetic shits... association with organics was a mistake

should we be worried about the hive? all traces of their occupation on Fundament-3 have ceased, and neighboring civilizations are arming themselves. already they've dusted the ark-born, and the eliksni are in peril as theyve lost their great machine. races in need of aid include: the Ammonite, Clipse, Dakaua, Harmony, Qugu, Sindû, and the Taishibethi. we have lost all contact with the stormjoys as well. stars help us.

pictured is a Krill specimen

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Okay, who dropped a computer and wi-fi router into the cesspool?

Gems, I think I fracked up big time.

OH SHIT A FUCKING YEERK
Keep it away from the Steven

Humans are sick.
I just wantched one of those entertainment shows for the smaller ones and what I saw was disgusting.
I don't even remember the title of the show, all I know is that it featured some of those creatures the humans refer to as equines. Only they talked, were multicolored and so on.
So it was a dumb silly show about friendship and the other garbage the Steven tlaks about.
And then I saw it. A weird lizard creature, who was friends with those equines.

AND IT ATE GEMS!
I am not making this up.
These hairless monkeys get entertainment from watching something eat gems. And not just any specific kind of gem, but all sorts off.
That thing was eating up an entire pile of diamonds, rubies and smaragds.

I got so sick by the sight, I poofed.

impressive. with a single stroke...

Spinel here my human friend stopped playing with me. We were playing tag so I tagged her and well she shattered I guess. I want a new friend right now.

As horrifying as that is, they probably see gem-organic fusions as forming tight bonds and strengthening alliances.
But this is literally the humans figuring out ways to kill us without shattering us.
The Diamonds can't just sit by and let this continue.
They have to do something.
Or I'll have to take matters into my own hands.

Wait are we gonna fight the Yeerks now? If so then please picke me up from this trash planet and I’ll GLADLY join the fight

*skitter skitter*

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Pearl, if it wasn't readily apparent.
I'd say I'm fairly attractive, though it's difficult to tell. Humans seem eager to fuse with just about any gem

Excuse me?
I am asking because I need help here, not to be insulted.
Jasper won't leave me alone right now, saying she needs to protect me at all time because I am "her assignment".
Dude, I just wanted to do something decent and give a homeless gem a workplace.

These things make cute pets. I don't see why humans fear them so much.

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You make me sick.
I can't stand Era 3 any longer.
I hope something comes along and kills all the organics and shatters all the gems.
Nothing matters anymore.

You aren't proposing some sort of... final solution
Are you?

Give her a new assignment, for example... getting me the fuck off of Tralfamadore!!

If that's what it takes.

No get the fuck away from it, they have methods of turning non organic sentient things too, don’t let it redpill you!

>Get it in the Steven as soon as possible
ftfy

I fracked up gems. I fracked up real bad

yes. they are great. please direct them to the nearest organic world, or the nearest gem/organic hybrid. you will do as we say. and you will lower your planet's defenses.

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can a gem get the logic plague?

what happened

it’s all fun and games until the luckiest human in existence plot armors his way to genociding your entire species

Don’t worry, whatever you did, I assure you I am in a worse situation

If it thinks, it can get the logic plague, especially if it’s basically coded which gems totally are.

Different Gemnon here, but I am already working on something.
See, I was part of an research team of Peridot's studying a species refered to as the Borg, who worked on something called "nanotechnology".
While we were actually immune to it, because the thing works only on organic material, I discovered that by slightly reprogramming them, they can be used to alter the molecular crystalline structure of other gems.
Don't ask me how I found that out in practice.

Anyway, I have prepared an entire vial of the stuff and I am ready to either inject it into a human or a gem of your guys choice.

your orders, mein führer?

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well humans in this world are passive and dont have government agencies that kidnap and torture children, so i think were good.

Long story short, I accidentally set a human on fire. I thought it was just a prank where they would lose all their hair, not set the entire zoo on fire

Does it work on other types of organic life?

i think its because one of the diamonds kept buying planets from this guy. i dunno, he seems pretty small so he couldnt be that big of a problem.

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Just pretend that you’re another gem... or maybe just leave the zoo and head to some other part of the galaxy... maybe you could even rescue me on the way to your other destination

who cares about the humans on the zoo? what are they gonna do? steal a ship? hahaha

A Lapis here.
can anyone explain to me what watersports is and why some humans ask me to participate with them in it?

Im so bored I dont know what to do anymore my gems.

Yes, please spread this information to your entire species.
We are in no way performing horrific scientific experiments on a child in order to make him an unstoppable supersoldier in the event of hostile alien invasion.
Please ignore any music that could be interpreted as being from some sort of "warthog run."
Carry on.

Oh I’d be happy to assist, water sports are recreational activities that well, involve water. From basic swimming to riding machines called “jet skis” if it involves water and it’s a sport, it’s a water sport.

they cant even do shit anyways because they dont have the covie cunts to steal tech from.

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Oh that guy...girl...it? I think it’s called Space Napolehitler

This is a lie, I know this because the result of your experiments have just worsened my situation
Why would you humans give such advanced weaponry to such idiotic soldiers

did you ever think you guys just got let go because you were bad at your jobs

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Ah, of course! Allow me to explain:
As their planet mostly consists of water, humans have developed a wide range of leisure activities involving aquatics.
This includes such things as "scuba diving," where humans use technology to breathe underwater and explore otherwise inaccessible places, "surfing," which is the practice of riding shaped pieces of wood or foam along a series of waves, and "wake boarding," which is much like surfing, but involves the use of a naval vessel for propulsion.
Hope this helps!

and apparently enslaved a planet of monkeys to destroy planets. i dont get any of this.

I can't wait to break your orbital bone with the back of my battle rifle.
I mean, haha, yeah, humans amirite guys?pff, pansies.

It was bad humans are here but organics that can kick our asses like Irkens Saiyans Flood are here too.

Alien here, so, are ya'll gonna apologize for sacking my planet and mudering most of my species or what?
Can we have our planet back at least, living on this colony ship for all these centuries is fucking up our biology

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>Organics
>Can kick our asses
Pick one and only one.

I don’t think I’ve ever met a more obstinant group of organics than the covenant.

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Look, what would you do with out of control military spending and an ethics document that quite literally just says "i dunno lol?"
Just be glad we stopped their libido.

Those saiyan things can destroy Homeworld in one blast.

How do you stop this single gay organic

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this, we eliksni have to deal with the gems AND the hive

Hey guys I'm in one of the human buildings and there's some sort of chemical contamination in here, one of the water containers is filled with a yellow liquid instead, does anyone remember what number corresponds to the emergency services on the human communicator devices? The liquid is producing a foul smell and the vapor responsible for it might be corrosive to organics.

Ah yugioh before it was cancer

that's a disposal device for excriment. it's not harmful to you or us

What the fuck is a babies, dude?

That would be a code 589-B-H20-33905-PISS

Oh really, because one of them keeps hitting on me and then saying some stupid catchphrase

Why are Peridots programmed to have autism?

A baby is like a human pebble, the fuck is a dude?

OH STARS SOME OF THEM JUST LANDED ON MY PLANET

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MOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDSSSSSS HUMANS ARE POSTING HERESY AND GORE AGAIN!

shut the fuck up, heretic. im gonna glass your planet for saying that.

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Hi Im a Jasper emerged 2 minutes ago, so uh whats happening?

>see courupted gems
>they are kinda hot
Diamonds Help Me!

Wars over, go grow up and pick up a trade

We are in the middle of an event known as "The Big Gay" where our diamonds have become rubber stamps and heterogemual fusion is normal. Also, gems can have "The sex" with humans.

??????

You no longer have a purpose, go get a job.

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>Be me
>Newly made Quartz Soldier
>Working in Kintergarden
>First of my batch
>Things are going well, moving debris and whatnot to make things easier for injection
>Something is skulking around
>Probably nothing
>A Yautja appears
>Tries to stab me
>Blade snaps clean off the hilt
>He stands there
>Before he pulls out another weapon I knock him clean across the canyon into a wall
>Tries using one of their shoulder plasma canons
>Just dodge it
>Throw a boulder at him
>He's crushed under it
>He activates one of those wrist explosives
>Starts laughing like a maniac
>Jump back into my hole
>Bomb goes off
>Injectors are a little scratched or bent but will work fine
>But there's even more debris and burnt Yautja bits all over the place
Why do we allow these things to live?
Their obsession with hunting is extremely annoying, the only thing they're good for is hunting xenomorphs and they can barely do that without detonating themselves

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hey, since they got rid of all their weapons and shit why don't we just sack the planet back and retake our world.
We can even enslave the gems that they leave in the planet that pop out!

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come to think of it, why did the big gay even happen. the president says that the Diamonds STILL havent reached out to him and china straight up doesnt allow gems. what happened?

>glassing a gem

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Hold still

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There is no longer a war that needs to be fought.
You are now without a purpose.
Go find one I guess.

The Diamonds cannot help you now.
They have gone the way of the ((Steven)) and would actually support your degeneracy.
The only thing you can do now is either control yourself and not interact with those gems in any fashion, or if you cannot curb your urges, shatter yourself and save everyone the trouble.

>ship that melts rocks
>not being the perfect weapon to use against rock people
you must be a dumb fucking brute.

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I think a dude is a n upper crust that slums it in the colonies.

So wait, a babies is a small human that builds chairs?

Gems....I found a different kind of human on a planet I was exploring. It just sort of...teleported in front of me. I'm scared. I've never seen a human look or act like this.
What do I do?

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no, it's a fresh human

aaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

So what the fuck happen to the giant cluster in earth?

Okay well, um... shit thought we dealt with that.
Oh hey! They're impotent! No need to worry about dying, eh?
Unless you're referring to Buck. Lord knows, he didn't get that name for nothing

Nah, human babies are lazy, they don't build anything they just cry, suck material out of their creator's upper chest, cry again, excrete waste and then cry some more.

EYES
Y
E
S

So it's a small human that just popped out of the ground? What do they do?

Oh no the organics are attacking.

No his name isn’t Buck, if it helps you find out who I’m with there are several other soldiers in this ship all differently colored
One of them seems to be stronger than white diamond herself, however he’s dumber than a ruby

instead of growing in the ground, they are incubated in their female parent's womb, then they get popped out of said womb, and continue to grow for about 18 more years ( earth time). during this time they are educated, and even employed, thus helping the global human economy.

What's the point of that?! What a waist of fucking time

Oh stars, where to begin.
I'd say this board is a pretty good summary

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this
all i needed to get in was a vpn and now i can shitpost on an alien basket weaving imageboard

I don't blame you, they're just so function-oriented, morphologically speaking, it's such a change of pace from the same old "two legs, two arms, one head" restrictive design philosophy.

WHAT ARE THESE MALE THINGS EVERYONE IS TALKING ABOUT

WHY WONT ANYONE EXPLAIN!?

Humans literally wear us Im so disturbed.

They have built in Kindergarten? Why haven't we thought of that?

well, that's what happens I guess

Don't take your eyes off of it.
Don't blink. Don't even blink.
Blink and your dea-Wait, your a Gem.
Just beat it until it dies.
It'll teleport around though so be patient.
Also it's loud as fuck.

im a male
imagine a gem with a deep voice and a built in injector. we're about the size of the average pearl, but there have been ones about the size of an amethyst

They trap pearls inside their flesh and utilize their capacities for their own gain, you have to free them

YOU WONT BE TALL ONCE WE VAPORIZE YOU TO DUST YOU SPACE HOOKERS!!!!

florpus hole

Quartz here, I had a necklace of human skulls back in the Earth rebellion. I respect a good show of viscous dominance.

Merciless fiends driven solely by their desire to reproduce and destroy. I'd say avoid at all costs, but if you're a rose quartz you've probably already infected yourself with one of their parasitic young.
When will the diamonds begin issuing chastity belts? This is getting out of hand.

Oh hey we do that too

Because it's stupid, why waste valuable time during reformation on making an extremely complex organ that will waste EVEN MORE time by putting the soldier out of commission for multiple months?

THEY HAVE BUILT IN INJECTORS TOO!? How do we harness this technology for Gemkind?

The diamonds are morons thats why.

Would any of you Gems like to hang out in my van?
I could teach you about Earth Culture, I have plenty of Gem Polish and Homeworld Music Discs in here
It's to die for

FRACK THERE'S MORE OF THEM

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I've been on the HumanWeb long enough to recognize a rape when I see one. Well jokes on you raper, Gems dont have vagina to force your penis in to.

who cares about a fucking pearl lol. i just sold one to a human.

Is long as you're not looking -directly- at them you should be fine.
Just focus on that big patch of grass to your right.
Don't look a the tall creatures.

I want fusion to be special you guys

Just remember, for an organic a death at a gem's hand takes a second, but a birth takes years, if you fight fast enough they'll run out of fresh bodies to throw at you eventually.

Pearls might be made to serve, but serving an organic, as part of it's body no less, is too low even for them. It stains the reputation of the whole gem species just by association.

Are the injectors our real masters?

>Fusing for love
>Not fusing for power
What are era 2's like this?

No there is diamond goo inside

who cares theyre just pearls. like, lmao. she cried when i sold her but their emotions dont matter.

Kek

It's era 3, nothing is too low anymore.
I've taken up consuming the foul tasting liquids humans utilize for celebrations. Takes the edge off the death of civilization and morality.
indiscriminate fusion helps too

you jest but american soldiers do that kind of thing regularly irl.

>american soldiers
>humans
Pick one and only one
t. Marine

Thanks...I...I think they're gone now.
I took down two of them and the last one teleported away. I think I'll have trouble hearing for a few days after all that screaming.
The pearls that they had inside were weird....I've never seen any gems like this. I tried walking back to my ship and I randomly teleported near it. I don't think these are normal pearls....
What were those things, if they weren't human?
Should I report this to the diamonds?

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You should be fusing to get a power boost to defeat your enemies.
Even then, only with other gems of your kinds.
This mixed-gem fusion thing is repulsive, and everyone's doing it nowadays.
Fuck Era 3.

A fusion here yh the gems that made me no longer exist basically Im a new being and desire a purpose. Apparently Im some kind of pleasure how disgusting.

say what you will about the country, but american soldiers are notoriously and unprofessionally brutal. most engagements border on warcrimes.

I think I’ve went to that sector before, if you can create a dimensional rift you may find yourself in a hellish world
In this world there is a creature called a blaze that looks life a flaming tornado if golden rods, combine the pearl with the crushed remains of the rod. This will create a power source that can be used to power dimension warping technology

>report this to the diamonds
Are you crazy? Do you remember what happened to the last gem who tried to bring public attention back to decommissioned gem types?
Of course you don't. All related records get scrubbed from the archives, to mask that we ever had any of these in our ranks.

There is no gem that matches those qualifications, on an unrelated note you have been personally invited by the diamonds to lake laogai

Should I just shatter myself?

It depends.
Do want to wander around aimlessly, force yourself to mingle with the organics, or be coerced into the multitude of double-digit fusions running amok?
Of course, there are some gems that wish to uphold some sort of former glory of the empire and are striking out to form their own colonies on other planets.
You could join one of them.

Oh shut it, space is so ridiculously vast a gem could go the entire universes lifespan without seeing a filthy human in person.

So i heard some humans talk about something onown as a "god emperor" and "purging"
I used one of their primitive knowledge aquiring devices called a "gugoal" to search for it and got pic related
Should we be worried?

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>Dimension warping technology
That sounds...really cool. Just out of curiosity though, how does a peridot like myself create a rift to go to this hellish world? It certainly sounds more interesting than anything that Era 3 has to offer right now.

Of course.
That's why I suggested she can also go with the gems that are starting colonies of their own on other planets.
No doubt they'll be traveling amongst the different stars and planets, like we used to before Era 3.

No, heretic. You should be elated for your cleansing.

Well the old method was a ritual involving 10(14, if you care about aesthetics) obsidians getting turned into a doorway, but nowadays you just need a warp pad, engineering knowledge and no common sense whatsoever.

Can I be your first target?
I can't stand Era 3 anymore.
Please shatter me.

Clod, you what?!

Thanks...I actually found the doorway made of obsidian that you were talking about not too far away from my ship. I I'll sneak out when my agate is not looking and enter the dimension from there.
Maybe if this turns out well, I'll be able to create a dimensional rift that leads to a dimension where "The Steven" never existed and our Diamonds were as powerful and glorious as they were in the past. And if it works, we can all escape from this nightmare known as Era 3.
I highly doubt any of my communication devices will work where I'm going, so this will be my last post for a while. Possible forever if...you know...things go bad.

Create a rectangular frame of pure obsidian, then light it on fire using your limb enhancer cannon
The planet’s physics will create the rift for you
Once you’re in though watch out for the undead inhabitants , they’re normally peaceful but follow a mob mentality. Do not aggravate them

And watch out for the giant flying alien things that cry all the time.
They shoot fireballs that destroy the ground around you.
You'll hear them waaaay before you see them.
They always sound close, even if they're really far away.

The minerals of the planet are resistant to their power however, use them as a shield
The fireballs can also be knocked back at the alien, use your limb enhancer blaster to knock them back

I want my diamonds to know they are cute