It's a harry hanging out with the other gryiffndoors in the common room slice of life episode

Who the fuck is spamming these off-topic Harry Potter threads? There were two yesterday.

>not posting the pasta
cringe

harry potter is fucking shit but the world-building is a guilty pleasure of mine and i hate it

>Ayn Rand God-Tier
You are literally the obnoxious 14 year old nephew/niece at Thanksgiving who wants to sit at the adults table

These.
Are.
Not.
Comics.
Or.
Cartoons.

So
What
?

Book tier:
Half Blood Prince
Goblet of Fire
Deathly Hallows
Prisoner of Azkaban
Philosopher's Stone
Chamber of Secrets
Order of the Phoenix

Film tier:
Prisoner of Azkaban
Order of the Phoenix
Deathly Hallows Pt.II
Philosopher's Stone
Deathly Hallows Pt.I
Goblet of Fire
Half Blood Prince
Chamber of Secrets

Sure but movies based on comics are okay?

Book Tier:
7>6>4>2>1>3>5

Film tier:
1=2>3>4>5>7.1>6>7.2

I once wished for a HP cartoon adaptation, but with Joanna being Joanna, I have no hopes for an adaptation.

>It's a "What color ARE Harry's eyes and whose eyes does he have" episode.

This. Harry Potter world at universal is based because of that.

I'd love a HP cartoon but keep Rowling out of this. Snorting all this money made her lose her shit.

>Ulysses, The Trial, and Clifford for President in the same tier

>no Cho Chang, instead Pansy

Artist has some taste.

I still don't understand why America likes HP3 so much. It repeats Ron's lame jokes 3 times and he's a complete idiot. The re-used tree scenes to show which time of the year it is are awkward. Lupin is the ugliest werewolf I've ever seen in any movie and looks ass. Important plot points were completely forgotten so noone understands the relation between Wormtail, James and Lupin.

For some reason, I think 2 is the best, followed by 5. 4 ironically felt too much like a movie trying to copy Harry Potter to me. I prefer suspension and talking and worldbuilding in those movies over action... not as dragged out as 7.1 though.

I'd agree but Chamber of Secrets last? What the hell?

Also
>Half-Blood Prince completely ignoring why the title was relevant.

Something had to be last, I just kinda chose at random. I remember liking the HBP adaptation at the time, but it focused so much on the romance angle and not on the Dumbledore and Harry detective stuff that I loved in the book that it left me pretty cold.

Personally i love 1 and 2 because Chris Columbus really seems to get kids, but 3 changed the pace of the series and did a great job aging it up an appropriate amount. Gary Oldman was inspired casting for Sirius, it's photographed well, and the acting is quite good as well. The only problem I have is that it cast Michael Gambon to replace Richard Harris, and Gambon doesn't seem as kind or genuine.

Let's just cut to the chase

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Who would actually care about a Harry Potter cartoon?
The best Harry Potter comic has already been made, isn't that enough?

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Harry Potter is only targeted at children. Besides, the books are better.

I like female Ron better. Reminds me of Seras Victoria, but lanky.
Or the Twins, goddamn.

>the world-building is a guilty pleasure
But that's the worst part. The worldbuilding is constantly self-contradictory nonsense.

lurk moar

The dullest franchises in the history of movie franchises. Each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though r-right
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

I tore through the first four HP books growing up (lost interest waiting for the fifth), but the only King work I was able to finish was The Stand. The concepts are intriguing but the writing is just so goddamn dry, like a good cut of steak that's been cooked improperly.
Similarly, your post reads like stale pasta.

>Similarly, your post reads like stale pasta.
no shit sherlock

This is pasted for the last thread. We get it, you don't like popular movies and books. Wow you're so edgy and sophisticated!

This thread deserves every pasta and shitpost because it doesn't belong here. Fuck your shit series of shit books and shit movies for children.

Who else chad magical creature patronus here?

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>he says while posting on co

and Butterbeer.

Are you triggered by Harry Potter? is it because your bible thumping parents didn't allow you to read it cause of all the satanism in it?

Nice

It's because he's an angry 14 year old who didn't grow up with it.

there's a lot i liked about it in the first few books because the world genuinely felt pretty mystical and fun, before rowling started to pile on the bullshit

Absolutely no sign of Dean Thomas or Seamus Finigan though?

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>tfw weasel

>Catch 22
>Low tier
You niggas can fuck right off.

>Pansy described as "pug-faced"
>this is the actor they gave her
Fucking lmao

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Catch-22 is the most relatable and realistic book about the military that I've ever read. Throw in some gay chicken and I'd assume it was based on a true story.

>it’s muggles finally kill off all the wizards and witches episode

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>Chamber of Secrets film at the end
pleb

I prefer Harry/Luna thanks

no offence but that's a basic opinion

Token chinese student called Ching Chong
French students are dumb whores
Love potion aka date rape drug used by kids
Black student (Angelina Jonson) gets fucking lynched by purebloods
Fat people are evil

Rowling is low key redpilled

>1984
>high tier
Not even Orwell's best.

actually those are aurors deploying anti-dementor measures.

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angelina
actually she marries george and gives birth to co's nightmare: black gingers.

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>atlas shurgged
Never fails to make me kek

What lame jokes are you talking about?

You mean a redbone?

Currently, I find it hard to watch movies other than the first two.

TIL a new word

How about muggles kill off the wizarding world

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Would your opinion of my plebitude be less harsh if I said Lockhart, Lucius and Dobby's casting was pitch perfect?

based
youtube.com/watch?v=lmtK4ONPZtU

Goblins run the banks

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>High school literature is best literature
Nigga wat

I think the worst part of Harry Potter is that it never took advantage of giving another person their own spin on the universe. Like imagine if they gave some dude to write the American Spinoff and it's just dudes with engraved guns instead of wands and the magical creatures aren't books or living crystal balls but American Folklore monsters like Paul Bunyan or the Jersey Devil.

The problem is any sense that can be made of the Harry Potter universe falls apart as soon as you leave Hogwarts.

Wow, it's been a while since I've seen this one

>harrypotter.fandom.com/wiki/Unlocking_Charm
The lockingpicking spell was invented by an african.

To be fair, I liked Dorian Gray, despite/because of the fact that it's a gayer book than a Mapplethorpe album

>It's a "Day in the life of Crab and Goyle" episode
I'd watch the hell out of that, I always felt like those 2 schlubs would get into some funny shit. Also you gotta have some episodes about the Dursleys just being funny awful people in their normal lives while Harry is at school.

If the incredibly cheesy & bland first two movies were the best in the series, then I'm glad I dropped off after #3.

>Beautiful men with hands like flowers
It's a hilarious read; you can't be depressed while you read that story.

I just want to be able to see the entirety of all the house dorms.

We've seen the Gryffindor common room and dorm rooms.
I think we've seen a bit of the Ravenclaw and Slytherin dorms.
And we haven't seen ANY of the Hufflepuff dorms.

GIVE ME COMFY SLICE OF LIFE GOSH DANG IT.

Neville is the best Gryffindor ever

>Dorian Gray

just look at how sexy he is

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They will probably reboot the Harry Potter series after they finish Fantastic Beast.

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>giving another person their own spin on the universe
This is literally always a mistake, nigger.

>We'll never have a HP cartoon because JK "Gay after the grave is oh so brave" Rowling is super autistic about it.
IT'S LITERALLY FUCKING PERFECT FOR A CARTOON YOU TWITTER GARBAGE FIRE!

>Harry is so dense he wouldn't realize Fem!Draco wanted to fuck him even if she spelled it out in green and silver fireworks while an army of Howlers scream it at him nonstop before exploding into confetti that spells out "FUCK ME!" With an arrow pointing directly to her.

hermione black now

>Tfw The killing curse ruined the villains
Giving someone an instant kill move completely sucks all creativity out of them, because why would they ever use anything but the instant kill move?

i got a peacock. i'm satisfied.

>engraved guns instead of wands
Nah, shotguns with slots in the stocks for the weilder's wand, like where the cleaning kit is in an .30 Carbine. It would probably have to be individually constructed out of the same wood as the wizard's wand, so that it acts as an extension of the wand, but probably with a smaller pool of applicable spells to use.
Like, try doing the swish and flick for a Wingardium Leviosa with a battle rifle. The closest you're going to get is swinging around a Nugget like a war club.

>Fem!Draco constantly trying to love potion Harry only for it to keep hitting Ron

Lestrange was at least a little interesting because she was a sadist that preferred to torture people with Crucio for a while.
I can barely remember the third one.

>We will never get some kind of Harry Potter work where they have to take on muggle witch hunters

>It's a "Gryffindor are the obvious heroes" episode
>It's a "Slytherin is evil for literally no reason" episode
>It's a "R-Ravenclaw totally exists guys... P-please stop laughing" episode
>It's not a Hufflepuff episode

>for literally no reason
youtube.com/watch?v=351Aa5q_S98

so, who gets the rights to HP when Rowling dies?
Maybe they can be convinced to do a hp cartoon.

I know that she has at least one kid, that's who she allegedly started writing the story for in the first place.
Don't know if she was smart enough to hold onto the rights to the property or not.

>heron
at least it's not a rat

I got a lynx and I'm totally happy with it.

>fox
Nice.

There anyway to do this without making an account?

Don't think so

I think I got a hawk or something

>Its an OP goes to bed and wakes up to find the thread is still up episode

>no Marauders mini series ever

How is this fucking thread about a book series with no comics or cartoons still fucking here

flipendo!

Gay and futa porn for hours, Yea Forums threads, /pol/ everywhere, dipshits screencapping their own Twitter posts and spamming them because they think they are so fucking clever, /a threads, /v threads...

Time for new janitors and mods.
I'm reporting my fucking self for this post

Name a fantasy setting that doesn't regularly contradict itself or just make shit up for convenience

oy vey

Name a fantasy setting where years after it comes out the characters retroactively become black, gay etc for diversity points
Name a fantasy setting where people shit themselves in public and vanish their shit

youtu.be/nZ62Mewedbs

But announcing reports is a bannable offense and false reports are a bannable offense, so does announcing that you're reporting your own post end up cancelling itself out?

If that's the case, then what about the TritonAnon?

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>Name a fantasy setting where years after it comes out the characters retroactively become black, gay etc for diversity points
Except that didn't happen, and you've been bamboozled by internet chuds trying to force an agenda, or you are that internet chud.

Books:
5=3>4>7>1>2>6
Movies:
2>1> and why would you keep watching after 3?

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Based and jordonpilled

actually they shit on the floor. get it right

Knowing that Albus was gay, do you think he also fangirl'd over Lockhart like all the women did?

Please give me more of these.

probably not, since he was headmaster when lockhart was a kid

Luna best girl

blonde pompous twat? nah sounds like he'd find the guy a bit familiar and get put off

somehow i forgot he canonically looks like johnny depp.

I want a remake of the movies that don't completely change the haracters because the script writer he's pervying on Emma Watson.
with an hermione who isn't utterly perfect and shows her annoying side, ron who isn't completely useless, Harry as sarcastic and angry as he really was, Ginny with an actually fiery personality, Voldemort not as a total laughable spaz villain.
The movies really fucked up the characters.

>with an hermione who isn't utterly perfect and shows her annoying side
we get it you hate women

to be honest i kind of agree with him. making hermione perfect and ron a complete dumbass with no good lines takes a lot away from both characters. especially since herm/ron is a thing, why would she fuck him if he's so useless

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what??? I love hermione because she's an annoying genius, a total know-it-all and a fantastic multi-layered character. Hermione in the movie is a lifeless perfect picture of perfection who can't do no wrong, steals lines from all the other charaters and barely has any of book!hermione's passion for helping others or personality.

Ron had some of the best lines, at least in the earlier films. I think between them there was a classic case of "you made your female character hyper-competent and as a result she isn't as relateable as your hapless male character".

chad dad

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>won mass trophies for the glory of his house
>beat the shit out of wizard nazis just for existing in the same 200 yard radius as him
>could turn into a craft beer logo at will
a true broseph