Name a character that can touch Superman. Let alone defeat him. Pro-tip: He one shots your favorite character

>beings your will down to zero
>hobo-shanks you

Is there a character that could even possibly EVEN TOUCH Superman? Let alone defeat him. And I'm not talking about Post-Crisis Superman. I'm not talking about sundipped Post-Crisis Superman either. Hell, I'm not even talking about sundipped Post-Crisis Superman with his mental blocks unlocked with the Torquasm-Rao and Torquasm-Vo Kryptonian martial arts, equipped with a GL ring, a perfect Jimmy Olsen, control of Titano and a Sun-Eater, with Lex/Batman DNA implanted in him giving him 24th lvl intellect. I’m also not talking about blue sundipped instant lobotomy enraged Post-Crisis Superman, with the White Lantern Ring and his original silver age powers and a Helmet of Fate on his head, host to Parallax and wielding a Sword of Superman because he is a master in kenjutsu and taijutsu, a perfect Jimmy Olsen (that can use Silver Age Powers), control of both Titano and a Sun-Eater, with Lex and Batman’s DNA and face implanted on his chest, access to the Green, sundipped Krypto guarding him and nine mini black holes floating behind him, entered Prime One Million Mode, casting galaxy wide Superhypnosis to everybody with Super mindcontrol to steal their powers. I'm talking about blue sundipped for 10^10^100 octillion years Prime One Million Pre-Crisis Rebirth Cosmic Armor Thought Robot Strange Visitor Superman with the White Lantern Ring, Helmet of Fate, Silver Age superpowers, Batman/Lex DNA, retcon punch, Miracle Machine and host to all emotional entities, access to all the Elemental Realms, three swords style w/ Sword of Supermans, casting Skyfather Jimmy Olsen as his servant, trained under Muhammad Ali, absorbed all 5D imps, having become the original vampire after having absorbed Mandrakk and obtaining the Demiurgic power, control over the speedforce with Endless concepts implanted in him and having rewritten the Book of Destiny while possessing quantum powers like Dr. Manhattan, and fused with SuperNicCage while having mastered 127 martial arts.

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Spongebob

*blocks your path*

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*jobs to King Dedede

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Superman can beat him

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Honestly I think that’d be a toss up. Supes couldn’t defeat a dude who can’t die but the dude who can’t die just shoots guns, granted guns that kill everything but Superman is faster than a bullet. Really depends on how fast the Saint if Killers bullets go.

>"Oh really, I guess I can cut loose on you then"

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Darkside. Omega trumps all. Superman is Mortal. Darkside is non-euclidean.

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Superman has a world level will

Some retard drew Thanos helmet wrong, this makes him look like he is balding

Can't a mere butler beat Superman?

Captain America

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Seeing Coriander Hasp and Supes fight would be pretty cool, but I'm not sure if Supes would be able to resist becoming one of Those Who Listen To Coriander Hasp. Even Nobles with high Persona can find it difficult.

Dedede almost always loses to Kirb. And at this point, Dedede and Meta are some of the very few beings who can even hope to hold a candle to Kirby in terms of strength.

No.

This, people seriously undersell what an asspull Braniac-5 just happening to have the Miracle Machine was. Metron gave mankind knowledge, this knowledge propagated until it reached CONTROLLER hands somehow, and Nix Uotan may have contributed too; I’m not sure about that last one. And the only reason THAT thing was relevant was because Diana asspulled a second wind from Anti-Life, otherwise Superman (and the Flashes) would’ve been left staring horrified at a Darkseid-hijacked humanity.

I’ve been told there’s an actual given reason why Darkseid can’t just Omega Sanction the JL on sight with a glance when he can btfo reality warpers like Mordru, steal the powers of entire pantheons and walk through Mon-El’s own eyebeams to deck him out like strolling through a light rain. But for the life of me, I can’t fathom what it might be. Even the weakened, splintered emanation of Trueseid in the Primeverse wrecked Earth-2 so hard mere parademons fucked up the Green, Red, Grey and the flame that births souls, drove Heaven into retreat and made Dr. Fate desperate enough to try hijacking Constantine to escape.

And all that’s just emanations.

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lol Geoff Johns turned Darkseid into Brute with fancy lasers

The really fucked up thing about fighting a Deceiver is the Rite of Two Skins lets their shards nearly perfectly assume the form of anyone up to and including an Imperator. So Coriander or Iolithae could force Superman to fight malevolent eldritch copies of Lois, Jimmy, Krypto and Ma & Pa Kent.

Golgo 13 with a kryptonite bullet

Darkseid is a fucking monster. Yea Forums likes to make shitty jokes at his expense because it doesn't read comics, but in most every situation he actually shows up in, he almost always wins until the heroes can mount enough of an offensive to drive his avatars away or jsut barely kill them.

Why do people get off on thinking someone can beat Superman? The entire appeal of Superman is that the powerfulness buck stops with a good guy.

I’m mad yes. Everything about the punch-out with “Anti-Monitor” was lame and dumb, and they still haven’t explained how the A-M can simultaneously be Mobius and Perpetua’s kid/Overmonitor and World Forger’s brother. At least they walked that back HARD with Earth-2 and the Other Box shit he asspulled in Odyssey in diminished but still superintelligent form. Beating Zeus would’ve been a more respectable feat if Zeus had any feats to speak of since everything from Diana’s last run was apparently fake copies of the real Olympians.

Has Supamate ever beaten a guy with reality warping power?

In most people’s cases, it’s because it is widely assumed that Goku runs on the same logic despite Toriyama doing his level best to explain how unlikeable Goku can be. In my case, it’s because I’m autistic and I can’t stop thinking of the bazillions of ways Darkseid should have logically been able to swat him and how his real rival should be someone like Wonder Woman, Green Lantern or maybe even Nix Uotan who has the versatility to keep up with the Omega Effect.

I’d say Orion too but let’s face it, DC has given up on the rest of the New Gods.

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Don't forget that if Coriander or Iolithae wanted, they could take the forms of say, Darkseid, or the Anti-Monitor and gain all of their abilities with the only drawback being they have to lose the Skin if the true name of the face they've stolen is used. And I'm not sure if that rule works for non-Miraculous beings, which means Supes might be shit out of luck.

And those are just two Deceivers. Something like Scelto or Lexiarchos Caducine could seriously fuck up most capes by their natures alone.

Muhammad Ali

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Multiple times actually.

Define “beat”. The most notable case I can think of is the 5D imp Vyndktvx in which he had the advantage of 5D imps perceiving time as one moment, a high energy station at one point, and a team effort near the end including some posthumans where they haxed his specific weakness by telepathically thinking his name backwards. Mandrakk shouldn’t really count because meta stuff aside, Superman literally needed help from a Moniter and a not!Manhattan version of himself fusing harmonies with him and Ultraman to get into a weapon made of god-metal forged by the first exploring Moniter.

...
...although, recently he did hit the World Forger hard enough to knock him over and obliterate the potential new multiverse he was trying to replace the old one with. And the World Forger is a big enough deal that Mxy takes orders from him, and as I said is siblings with the Overmoniter/Anti-Moniter

>Moses/Christ figure slain by Muhammad

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Why does he sit like such a slut?

Oh, and Flower Rites. Any Excrucian can just choose to attack the very concept of Superman and try to erase him that way, without him being capable of perceiving it. Sure, the multiverse will react with overwhelming force the instant they try, but I don't think it can act fast enough to entirely stop them before they pull it off. At best, they just create a Mimic instead of excruciating Supes entirely.

Very true. I remember having a similar conversation with another user ages ago where he and I both assumed Supes might actually count as miraculous because of some of the new (silly) lore: Being the creative lynchpin of the entire multiverse according to DoomCock and Final Crisis: Superman Beyond, having a direct line to the god of superheros Ahl per Milk Wars which apparently gives him immunity to reality warping corporations with mutagenic, history rewriting milk and New Super-Man implying his powers are partly or similar to chi.

Why is there so much good Nobilis discussion on Yea Forums? /tg/ of all places only talks about it constructively once in a blue moon

A man with all the same powers as superman, but who is 1% faster
I name him Dave and he is canon this post

I think I might have been that user, but it's good to see that Nobilis still gets discussed here. Also yeah, Superman probably counts as sufficiently Miraculous that he can damage an Excrucian assuming he can tag them. Unfortunately, Excrucians come with all kinds of nasty fucking hax of their own to put him down if need be. Coriander could easily convince him to walk out of the world with a sentence, Lexiarchos would always be 5 steps ahead of him with all kinds of horrible plans, Genseric Dace would literally be the reason why Lex and th Legion of Doom keep finding new ways to murder him, Oreute Bryce could overwhelm him with sheer numbers, Scelto could kill and replace him, etc.

/tg/ is basically Yea Forums at this point. It's a soulless husk of something that was once good. It's only useful for shitposting nowadays.

"Ahem, excuse me but *whipcrack* at least post someone powerful

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>VSBW
Utterly revolting.

Superman's metafictional power of getting his writers to make him win is more powerful than Simon's 8 bit pebble level whip.

>Those Who Listen To Coriander Hasp
>Nobles with high Persona
>a Deceiver
>the Rite of Two Skins
>an Imperator
So anime is just a bunch of nips coining a bunch of new bullshit terms to make their properties sound more storied and thought out than they really are, huh? Not surprising for a culture that exaggerates everything they touch as epic and important like calling grapes dipped in sugar "Drops from the Moon" or calling a really big mountain a literal holy deity.

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So, anyone with a kryptonite bullet.

Only if Superman jobs.

Superman can knock himself out?

Nobilis is a diceless narrative-driven tabletop RPG, user. It's also mostly a western creation, not done by any nips (though Jenna has travelled to such places a couple times).

Those Who Listen To Coriander Hasp refers to his Pseudo-Estate (a twisted and unholy bastardization of the actual concepts that govern existence), and it describes the specific method by which he breaks creation. Persona is one of the game stats that deals in shit that fucks with the mind and will, whilst a Deceiver is a type of Excrucian, the main villains of the setting. The Rite of Two Skins is an ability specific to them, and an Imperator is basically a God embodying the very concepts of all things.

Nobilis is a really weird setting, full of really weird things. It's kinda like DC in that regard.

Superman can survive even himself.

>more bullshit terms
Ok sure, nerd.

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Not sure what you're complaining about. You do realize DC uses just as many (if not more) "bullshit terms" right? Hypertime ring any bells? The Bleed? God-Sphere?

Don't go pulling double-standards, user. It jsut makes you look dumb.

Also, all the words used up above are actual terms in the English language. "Imperator" literally just means commander. An Excrucian is derived from excruciate, which means "to inflict pain/torment."

In comparison to DC, Nobilis actually tends to use real terminology more often than not to refer to its stuff. It just utilizes it in a very surrealist sense usually.

>said user, posting on the Yea Forums board for Comics & Cartoons

Vapeduck.

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Anyone but him.

she could kill him with a touch
even when shes still a little girl

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Do I need to remind you what that S on your suit stands for?

sack zack snyder
yeah we know

Goku

Squirrel Girl could beat him

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Genie from Aladdin. Can anyone beat him? I'm talking about free from the lamp Genie.

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You can try to slam me
With your harder stuff
But your double whammy
Isn't up to snuff
I'll set the record straight
You're simply out of date
You're only second rate

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okay but could anyone take down free jafar?

Genie jobbed constantly in the animated series

i'm pretty sure kirby is indestructable. i'm sure that he'd win against superman.

You can injure him with falling apples and Waddle-Dees tho, he’s just that good