JSA Storytime: Gen13

Tex here, let it be known I was not involved in that WW flamewar the other day

He just wants to be involved in everything that could possibly get popular someday so he can have his TPBs on DC's rec lists

Hello, Storyteller.

It has occurred to me that Gen13 is basically a Saturday morning cartoon in comic form.

Also, Green Lantern was really good this week. Which sucks because it means I have to keep giving Morrison kudos, and I really don't want to.

Anyway, how was your week?

DC books are still bad? Gen13 reboot nowhere in sight? Vertigo killed? Marvel books got good? Aaron still is ass? Hickman teases incest? Morgan Le Fay played by Elizabeth Hurley? Image is racist against Asians?
any other news of the week so far?

>so he can have his TPBs on DC's rec lists
>thinking they'll be printing anything in two years at the rate AT&T is pruning them

JSC did say he envisioned Gen13 to be like Scooby Doo

I'm really tired but I have a weekend off for once!!!

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Harley wank, Superman wank, cheap deaths, Dinah is a green lantern now because Hal was one of the cheap deaths, cheap emotional wank

>WW flame war
You'll have to be more specific, there were like three, and I was probably involved in all of them.

The speculator boom really was one of the dumbest fucking things.

>Superman wank
I actually really did like the seven pages Snyder dedicated to a Superman punch in Justice League today.
I don't even normally enjoy power wanking, but that was nice

Please let this be a joke. Please.

bleh

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here we go, owls

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It's always weird to me when they give real properties fake names since it's not illegal to simply mention them.

Oh man I love these issues.
Especially the not so subtle shittalking of Top Cow.

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B-but OP, he misses the old wholesome Superman and DC, that's why he keeps making dark and gory shlock ta(y)lor-made for social media reposts!

he does strike me as Extremely Online

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But man wasn't it awesome when he wrote dumbass shit in Injustice?
It was so-bad-its-GOOD!

>Top 10 Most Ambitious Anime Crossovers

>DC books are still bad? Gen13 reboot nowhere in sight? Vertigo killed?
Nothing of value was lost

... Shut the fuck up. Really? Really with thi-Okay. Sure. Whatever. The Punisher, the Ninja Turtles, the Predator... why the fuck not Gen 13. Fine. This is just fucking FINE.

This reminds me that Hack/Slash had an Archie town that the various writers actually kept going back to over and over.

Cranky, we've only begun to begin

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Someone once said they felt like Johns comics were written to get a lot of (You)s in storytimes, and Taylor gives me the exact same vibe. There's a reason pages from Injustice are always getting posted here.

Archie met the Ninja Turtles?

you're mean

See? Archie is only the first level, here

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You were in it, someone mentioned me for some reason

I think it was so-bad-it's-bad. Like The Room is so bad it's good. Injustice was like, a big reminder of why comics are still fucked.

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Again, I love these issues.

>freelance forest

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I'm reading those fan-made Superman Post Crisis compilations, and this was pretty much my reaction to Injustice when it was going on
That's what Cates is doing now too. He always goes for the strongest or most overpowered characters, and does "epic" moments with them

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getting the rights lined up for all of this had to be epic

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he's also trying to do the Warren Ellis sort of cult figure thing but he's not remotely interesting enough on his own to pull it off

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The intentional clashing of art and writing styles. The opposing attitudes. The banking on the nonsensicality of the premise for humor... It hurts. Oh it's completely deliberate and self aware, and it hurts so much.

It's like it's daring me to be angry at it, knowing full well that I can't rationally justify that anger. It's fucking mocking me.

You just gave me a thought.

Bendis Gen13.

So Fairchild gets blacked...?

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so what you're saying is that I'm not going to find a trade copy

fuck me at least better than Tynion or Orlando

the best Wildstorm has always been simultaneously sincere and self-aware

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Let's just give Bendis everything I love, JSA, Wonder Woman, Titans, in fact let's have him give Donna a new origin. I'll just drink myself to death real quick.

>diversity in a fucking wildstorm book
That would literally be the only Bendis-ism that wouldn't be a problem

Oh yeah. Archie gets into all manner of weird bullshit crossovers. Had a pseudo crossover with Shadow the Hedgehog once, even.

If you were mentioned, it must've of been one of the two "arguments" I was having with Sugartits. WHO IS STILL FUCKING WRONG, BY THE WAY. Just saying.

oh yeah Tynion got his partner a book at Boom

>Donna now in Teen Titan Go
>as Robin's summer love interest

LOL

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Not subtle!

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>Bendis Wonder Woman
Tex. Please don't even joke about that.

And they really just need to roll with Donna being a living temporal anomaly. Donna Troy: Guardian of Time and Space.

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Like Hourman or Waverider.

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You know what I mean.

Fairchild ends up getting banged by some Luke Cage mother fucker.

Or make her a lipstick femme...

He's bending the corners and spitting all over it.

Caitlin starts out as Velma and becomes Daphne.

It's not even boarded, he's fucking it all up.

>The speculator boom really was one of the dumbest fucking things
There's like four guys at my LCS who rush in to grab all the variants the second they open.

Isn't that from like that fuckin Lex Luthor 90's mini?

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you knew Spawn had to show up

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I mean, I knew Archie published the comics based on the cartoon but I didn't know the man himself actually met them.

I’m really really enjoying War of the Realms

Straight up. Her immunity to causality makes her suited to dealing with wacky time shit, so Chronos, God of Time recruits her as an agent. Bam, she now has a general purpose, and there's no need to rehash the origin bullshit.

now THIS is more far afield

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3 guys at mine got every variant of Black Cat

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Robinson's pretty shitty "Legends of the DC Universe" story about the Ultra-H.U.M.A.N.I.T.E.
A three parter that really, really did not need to be three parts
The fan compilations are almost put together too precisely. This is the contents for part 5. Five volumes in (hundreds of pages), and up to issue 5 of Byrne's Man of Steel.
I don't like that the contents and covers are left for the very end

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we all like some bad things on occasion

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>JSC Madman
Pretty cursed t b h

Industry saved!!!

Damn, some of those required the LCS to order 500 regular copies to get one

The problem is that MOS jumps ahead several years between issues

woah!

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Oh fuck! Shi is in this one!

iconic cover
they always get every Artgem, Adam Hughes and JSC piece too, it's dedication

This really is quite the tour of the Comics of the Then

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Y'all I kinda love this crossover

Gen13 crossovers are literately all gems

"Lady Mortem?" Aw, come on.

Yeah, I realized that as I finished it up. It spans around a decade of older Clark, right?
These compilations even included the Starman Jor-El issue

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It's a pretty good diversion

Yeah, basically Byrne wanted to write a new origin but also bring the character to the current day since it wasn't a full-on reboot. It's a pretty interesting approach that I haven't seen from the Big Two again since.

Careful guys, Katchoo could take them all on with her lesbian assassin skills

>Blood-quarters
>Black Frag
I chuckled.

Francine and Katchoo from Strangers in Paradise too? What the fucking fuck?

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they went all out on this!

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>What the fucking fuck?
SiP was briefly published by Image. Moore did a Image parody in the first issue under them

Oh yeah, Madman was at Dark Horse back then. Holy shit, this is nuts.

I'd buy a omnibus of all Gen 13 crossovers

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Way to not answer Tammy's question.

this is the best thing we've read in a long time

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It's fucking great
I'm dyin' here

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Those lips though...

I only recently discovered that the whole "bad girl comics" thing was an entire fucking genre. Because of course.

She just wanted to know if they made Wallace & Gromit shirts, man :(

its genuinely fun

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Okay, when are the people from old comics ads showing up? You know, like that martial arts dude or the sea monkeys. They're the only ones missing at this point.

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For fun and profit I uploaded Dave Sim's Legion Outpost letter:
imgur.com/a/1XR07Lc

lol, that's definitely Dave Sim

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I like how a lot of girls are writing in to this series

>Dave Sim
If it's all the same to you, I'm just gonna not.

I feel bad for the people who saw the regular cover, excitably bought it, then saw that it was Travel Foreman on the inside.
And I like Foreman, but he is not who you would have in mind for a Black Cat book that is being advertised with 100% cheesecake.
And holy shit his art was rough in it, mostly thanks to the terrible colouring

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there's a lot here to appeal to girls in addition to the obvious fap fodder for the male audience

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the coloring hurts my eyes to stare at it, Ultimates was unreadable for me too because it

It's him at only level 2 craziness, in circa 1976 or so. All he does is shit on Roy Thomas and Weisinger while being super pretentious.

It's pretty much Sim praising Joe Orlando for being a good editor and that Roy Thomas, good work that he has done, seems to be driving people nuts at Marvel.
Oh, and he hates Mort Weisinger for his work on the Superbooks, and is glad that Wein and O'Neil are revitalizing the company with stuff like Kaluta's Shadow, Swamp Thing, and Famous First Editon

yeah, girls like strong fun girls, Zenescope's and Michael Turner's audience is mostly female

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I don't think any women are buying, like, the what's the publisher of those awful adult books, that stuff

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Reminds me of LoSH actually, a lot of girls who are "men want them, women want to be them" kind of characters, which is what I'm seeing in the Legion Outpost stuff I'm reading. Gals love that Saturn Girl, even a couple of prehistoric Saturn Girl cosplays in there.

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>even a couple of prehistoric Saturn Girl cosplays in there.
I wish I saved the pictures from that one recent cosplay thread. Some guy found a shit ton of old comic con photos from the 1970s and 1980s, and it was great

their butts are mine? uhh, okay?

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>there's a lot here to appeal to girls
>in Gen 13
Such as...?

>the what's the publisher of those awful adult books, that stuff
Rich Johnston's money purse, Avatar Press/Boundless

I feel like I had some Legion/Cerebus art he did saved at one point

As user says above, we had the early letters from girls writing in about how cute and awesome Roxy is, and how they love her style etc. the girls are characters people saw themselves in.

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With the penis-dinosaurs and shit? Boundless.

70's nerds are so endearing to me. Their passion is so genuine. You basically would never go unless you were an obsessive, and everyone just wrote each other letters.

Not even yelling at clouds like I usually do, modern cons are what they are and people like them, it just looks like so much fun back then.

they are though

that's it! Boundless has, like, nothing appealing to women in it

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>a lot of girls who are "men want them, women want to be them" kind of characters
That phrase always reeked of bullshit, to be honest.

>characters people saw themselves in
They saw themselves as wacky idiots? That makes a depressing amount of sense.

I mean, I'm sure there's some, but that stuff is really for dudes

the Zenescope cheesecake is different than the Boundless porn, too

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Ain't no lie

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Fairchild is going full Melody there.

Needledick there is a reference to the Animal House frat guy who spanks Kevin Bacon

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desuarchive.org/co/thread/107431996/#107439896
From that post, going down quite a bit
Look at this magnificent stuff

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>Professor Insano
...

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I missed story time!

Hi, no longer present OP.

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WHOLESOME

>Professor Insano
The wrestler?

what the actual fuck?

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HI user we'll be back FRIDAY for THREE DAYS OF GEN13

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Bendis clearly has cameras installed in bathrooms or something. No one that incompetent should still be that successful.

>No one that incompetent should still be that successful
This has been what cape comics are for at least 20 years

God I miss this art

Thanks for posting as always, Storyteller.

This book is just getting weird now, and I don't know how to feel about it.

This, on the other hand, is just kinda sad. Though equally confusing as to why.

Caitlyn stop trying to convince Grunge to not buy the rare variant cover, Alt comics don't appreciate in value the way artificially scarce gimmicks do.

Lot of non specific looking costumes like that old Wonder Woman episode where Rene Auberjonois steals a laser from the scf-fi con.

>LoSH ultra fan dorks have trouble getting dates and are awkward when it comes to the sex they are attracted to
No way dude

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>Wonder Woman episode where Rene Auberjonois steals a laser from the scf-fi con.
...

I love you Storyteller please be safe

>trading you would for a bullshit variant cover that isnt even bagged and boarded

God, Grunge used his powers to turn his brain into a rock permanently.

Green Canary is the only part of that that sounds at all like it has potential.

... gotta day the He-Dude name drop did not prepare me for this.

Spaced Out

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Yeah, but the whole "I wanna be just like [X]!" part just adds on an extra layer of pathetic. Would it seriously kill these people to at least TRY to have some dignity? Goddamn.

Yeah, because Archie used to publish the Ninja Turtles, you were friends with a giant flying cow head that could travel in time and alternate dimensions.

Oh wait, shit, his is after Image got the TMNT rights and did their disastrous volume isn't it?

>dignity
>in JSA thread
Son what are you doing here if you're not a weird dork

Never suggest Bendis anything ever again,

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HEy my social anxiety fuck ups were around long before I became a Legion fanboy

... I just fucking can't with this shit anymore.

Fuck you. Looking up to fictional characters is pathetic nonsense. But the, the idea of role models in general is pretty fucking stupid. Do not apologize for these peoples' idiocy, and certainly do t act like it's okay. That shit is not okay.

NGL, I would buy a Bloodquarters Action Playset.

Cranky I saw you say that in that WW flamewar, I think you can see something in a fictional character you want for yourself without necessarily looking up to them like a real person. After all, a lot of times the character reflects the beliefs of the writers. Marston's ideas may have been a little weird but I think there was a message in what feminism meant to someone in a culture that refused to let women even speak on a Harvard campus, things that can be applied to today.

I know you hate this cursed planet I think there are lessons in these characters, despite being idealized, and the way we view fantasy can have an affect on how we view reality. I'll always be shooting for Star Trek IRL, for example, even though we're more like Idiocracy.

thanks OP this is the most fun from storytimes I had in a long time

I see we've hit Heroes Reborn.

Was this originally a pack in or premium issue associated with Wizard? Is this all about Gareb Seamus?

The Maxx was a great cartoon.

Tex, it's a work of fiction. Period. Regardless of whether it reflects the views of the writer, it is not real. Sincerely incorporating these ideas into one's lifestyle is a sign of delusion. Hell, even letting this shit resonate with you on an actual emotional level is a bad sign.

Also, loving submission is bullshit. It's essentially a fancy way of saying "Trust me, and I'll take care of you.". But here in the real world, you can't afford to trust anyone, because the world we live in rewards selfishness and malicious exploitation. It's just not viable, not even as a fantasy.

Shit the one on the right is Darkchylde? Evangeline?

JSC female monobody does Francine's thicc a disservice.

I mean people look up to religious figures :^)

But in all seriousness I can not say "I want to do what Wonder Woman does" while also saying "she's right, life is precious and I think people shouldn't get filled with bullets at middle school" and "man it's very difficult to find work at the bottom of the labor rung, I think things should be easier" and "taking pride in your work even at Taco Hell is admirable, I'm going to take pride in my Mcjob at Office Depot and try to help people in any way I can"

We're probably just going to have to disagree on this point though, since I might be more of a manchild, which I will accept and try to address

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>Doesn't mention WML at all when he finally shills out and does a The Maxx -- Batman crossover
>crossover never actually finishes
hahahahah

fuck Sam Kieth

Well, there we go, Gen 13 is finally officially a comic book.

writers dont get paid
ever

Fuck you and your self-aware optimism. You think I enjoy being a cynical asshole? Fuck no. I wish I could bring myself to look up to Diana and try and apply her ideals to real life, but I just fucking can't. Best of luck to you though. I just hope it doesn't bite you in the ass.

WML did get paid, back in the 1990s for the MTV show.
But two health related bankruptcies will easily remove that cartoon cash

man you gotta be mean for me being an optimist?
i can't in good faith look at this planet and tell anyone else to be positive, but I want to believe and i woiuld drink 24 beers a night instead of 6 if I didn't love comics so much and think Diana was a beautiful character

Did Loebs kill a puppy at DC HQ or something? Why do they hate him so much?

I like you user and empathize

Roxy is CUTE.

he's not an artist and/or friends with jim lee so he's not allowed to succeed
i want to meme loebs into being a thing, really badly, like i feel like his wondie can make someone who doesn't give a shit about the character into a fan

I want to believe I helped meme perez's ww here on this board so I've been namedropping wml everywhere I can

They just don't think his stuff will sell. It's a pattern that's happening a lot since that department seems to be in a mess, and bookstores are not buying as much "newly collected" stuff as before from them. I wonder what the numbers were like for that Deodato Jr WW trade. That's the only bit of stuff they've reprinted in years.
His Wally stuff was great, but was overshadowed in marketability by Waid.
Tom King actually recently mentioned that his first DC comic was an issue of WML's Flash

B-b-but comics never tried to appeal to girls before Kelly Sue Deconnick!

It's that hope that you cling on to. That tiny sliver of hope that I don't have. I love Diana too, but as much I want it, she's not real, and neither is what she represents.

I can't understand. I just can't understand.

>Roxy is only 16

Ruhroh.

we're opposite sides of the same coin cranky
we both must exist to bring balance to Yea Forums

the feet are the best part of this page

Fuck, we really are, and it's weird.

keep it up, he deserves as much attention as possible, those shorts he did for Wasteland are fucking awesome

Wait a minute, the girl from the Maxx was blonde. Sarah, how the fuck did you get to the Outback?

That's Katchoo from Strangers In Paradise.
Drawn with the largest bust she's ever had.

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Of course Archie was going to show up eventually.

I love this kind of stuff.

That is goddamn amazing. All hail you, skinny 70s nerd Jeddak!

That is a lewd image if I seen one.

The Meta is out of the roof.

The irony of that last panel not that Savage dragon has become porn.

Shi, thats a face I haven't seen in a long time.

What exactly is the legality of this?

Is this the most 90s comic ever made?

What about edgy Superman with a mullet?

Thanks for running, OP.

>Jim Lee's shiteating grin

That shoud've been the default Wildstorm-logo