Greg, I'm not having sex with you

Indeed. I asked one of my old friends who still lived there what happened and the lesbian who divorced came back and now the three live together, that was about 1-2 years after the kid was conceived. So all in all a happy ending.

>I asked one of my old friends who still lived there what happened and the lesbian who divorced came back and now the three live together
>that man converted two lesbos into loving dick and now has his own harem
The absolute chad legend

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Those words would only be said by someone who was thinking about having sex with Greg. Also, Lapis is for fetish and should be treated as such. I'd post but I lost my big folder on a PC switch.

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Does this help?

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maybe if it was lapis, it would

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Everyone thinks they're not going to have sex with Greg when they first meet him user.
Then something inevitably happens and they wake up with the sun in their eyes, blazing in through the van window, nestled face down against what they first think is a salami.
Bards man.

what the fuck do you think he meant by "let me drive my van into your heart?" Fusion wasn't a metaphor for sex, Greg was.

>Has an affair with a lesbian
>manages to get both riding his dick
This man is an absolute God

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She'll have to, you know, because of the implication.

...Are you gonna hurt gems?

Anyone else notice lapis sounds alot like hawkgirl?

No, no one is hurting gems! They wouldn't put themselves in a dangerous situation anyway, because of the implication.

and 5 mintues later she's getting mating-pressed.

Why is the thought of matting pressing a girl so alluring?

Because you're a virgin

That was a bit uncalled for

Found the woman

Just stop being a virgin. I did, and now I've earned the privilege of shitposting drunk on you fuckin incels

>incels

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cuz' it's the most quintessential expression of wanting to impregnate the woman.

It's actually a really difficult sex position and you need to have really good endurance in your legs to do it properly, and even then it feels more like excersize than sex. Doggy or missionary is way easier and more practical

Based

>"aww jeez, looks like I'll have to conform with the cheap doll scale robot knockoff I bought at the flea market as your substitute, it was at a bargain bin price and it even looks like you!"
>"on a second thought, it kinda smells funky, better give it a good car wash service before I have it service me, will be thinking of you, gonna name her... bob"

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>can barely satisfy straight women
>thinks they can turn lesbians straight

Why must a character this cute and full of potential fall so hard and become garbage?

The only good thing about her is the shit ton of fetish art she spawned. She's only good for rape and by rape I mean her being the rapist

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Speak for yourself incel.

I'm a lesbian

are you that butthurt femcel from the goth thread?

>its a dyke behind these posts
Fucking figures

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Lapis a fucking SHIT
Post Peridot.

Okay

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The reason why NTR Oji-san bodytypes are commonly portrayed doing mating presses is because those guys have legs like tree trunks

>Bards man.
This makes so much sense. Greg is a fucking Bard

My girlfriend is s huge weeb so we tried it. It IS a lot of fun. Greg probably does it routinely to the gems but in a loving way.

>My girlfriend is s huge weeb so we tried it. It IS a lot of fun.
Oh please, dont stop now, go on

And any many man can be turned into a huge homo with a good dicking

Change my mind

We browsed /aco/ and some hentai together when we first started dating because she wanted me to show her why I was on Yea Forums all the time. It was mostly because of drawthreads on Yea Forums and stuff from other boards ebony threads on /s/ and /gif/ but she wondered why there were entire threads dedicated to it. So we tried it. It makes both of us go crazy.

Probably. Nothing beats the cock.

nope. science says that men are settled in their sexuality while females are more often than not fluid in their sexuality.

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>We browsed /aco/ and some hentai together when we first started dating because she wanted me to show her why I was on Yea Forums all the time. It was mostly because of drawthreads on Yea Forums and stuff from other boards ebony threads on /s/ and /gif/ but she wondered why there were entire threads dedicated to it. So we tried it. It makes both of us go crazy.
I want to fuck your girlfriend

What was it like

For us? Great. For you? Unfortunately not happening

>males are settled in their sexuality
Now this is coping
Also the same scientists say lesbians experience more orgasms than straight couples so which is it?

Lesbians don't have as much sex as straight couples, so they're both ridiculously sensitive when they get to it. Look up "lesbian bed death".

No im saying how did she react getting mating pressed? What was she doing in it? Did she get kinky and start acting as a cartoon character you like?

Bed death exist for any relationship though, why else do woman actively seek other men when their current one can't satisfy them?

Bed death happens categorically more frequently with lesbians in specific due to the lack of initiator in most relationships.

That's not what i said though

Yeah, you tried some really clumsy deflection which I'm trying to ignore for your sake. Other relationships having bed death doesn't relate to lesbian bed death in any way.

You're still avoiding my post

Women actively seek other men in a relationship almost exclusively for the emotional thrill, user.

Yes and I'm the Pope

You should really stop kissing the feet of Muslims, Eminence. There's no way that's sanitary.

And you should stop letting woman coerce you into believing that they sleep with other men not because you can't please them my son

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Hasn't been a problem for me, because I don't care if they try and sleep around. The last three g/fs who discovered this tried to jump my bones repeatedly, to "make me care."

There should be a comic of Jasper brutalizing the gems, only to be stopped by a instant loss mating press from Greg. Preferably drawn by Orange Kissess. He then proceeds to fuck her ever imaginable way in every hole while the gems tease her and finally Jasper begs for more.

>because I don't care if they try and sleep around
Cuck

Whatever, dyke.

Don't use your boogeyman on me just because your a cuck lol

I am ship it

Have fun not boning, sweatie :^)

>Have fun
Your gfs sure didn't

Seeing lesbians assmad is great

>still thinks I'm a dyke
No need to shift the blame on others just because cant please women buddy

They just needed some aim adjustment. I'm sure you know all about that from high school, the gossiping about what this or that person is doing, saying, thinking. Fascination is what causes women to do anything, let alone cheat.

>didnt deny it
Seething dyke detected

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And you still don't deny your a cuck and can't please woman

>implying that guy is me
Dropping the contractions is a classic sign of angry typing among females btw

Are you desperate that you think everyone is a female?

Propaganda.

that neck shadow looks like a neckbeard/5-o'clock shadow with natural hair color

Can you type a coherent thought, thot?

Perhaps. But funny nonetheless.

>p-please be a female I'm lonely
OOF

cope harder lmao

Im not, but here you are being a raging dyke

*you're

Now youre just screeching for no reason, i would advise you to have sex but you would fuck that up

You just can't leave it alone, can you? The words gnaw at you for some indeterminate reason. Gotta get the last barb in. Gotta assert dominance on a Ugandan knuckledusting BBS.

And im not a dyke but you seem desperate for me to be one