Meanwhile, in MCU Yea Forums

You fuckers had it so lucky. I still had to go to my shitty job as a fucking mail man. The thing is that it was I couldn't even do any looting because everyone was on high alert. I was planning on breaking into a hotel and living in there for the rest of my life while everyone was mooping but the fucking jews that run them still wanted every one to do what happened before. I'm actually living in a worst place now because I had to give up my apartment for some that turned into dust.

*quips with everyone around me*

Vanished here, did I miss any did comics in the past 5 years?

Dustbro here, so what games did I miss?

You joke, but thinking about it, the situation is pretty fucked up: a lot of people must have moved on during those five years, dating/marrying/starting a family with someone else, only for their lost loved ones to come back, unaware that five years have passed.

did you hear that all the superheros are coming out as gay all of a sudden? I wonder why.

So apparently there's a another Avengers team, but they live in space? And apparently Thor is a part of it now? Why wasn't I told about this sooner?

>Get snapped while having sex with my girlfriend
>When I get unsnapped, I appear naked in her bedroom while she's fucking some new guy
Fuck you, Thanos.

>not joining in
Look at this guy.

Only reoly to this post if you got Snapped

Bendis got dusted, so there were barely any comics anymore.

Does anyone else miss the dust years? Now that everyone's back I get caught up in traffic and stuck waiting in lines way more than I used to.

Sup. Was strolling through an avenue and half the people that were around saw me turn to dust, was pretty embarrassing.

>didn't get snapped
>got close to Natasha
>use the 5 post-snap years to build a relationship
>time travel becomes a thing
>she's gone forever
>I'm still grieving

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kek'd

>tfw got snapped while taking my father to her chemotherapy
>when I came back, I find out he didn't respond to treatment and passed
>he died thinking I was gone forever
>he probably died because losing me made him lose the will to go on
>I never even got to attend his funeral
some days I wish I had stayed snapped

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>girlfriend snapped
>spend five years getting over it
>now she's back
>she wants to keep dating
>but that shit's illegal now
Fuck man I'm happy but I can feel the judgement whenever we go out somewhere.

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n00bmaster69 here. Thor, god of chunder, is a pussy and I fucked his dead mom.

>got close to Natasha
kek, SHIELD analyst here: Agent Romanoov goes through about five guys a week. She has a revolving rota of fuck-buddies who know nothing about one another which she constantly adds and subtracts from. Hell, every so often the boys upstairs hire an intern who's just her type and assign him to Avengers liaison duties for the express purpose of having Romanov turn him into her sexual stress ball. We call them "Widowmakers".

tl;dr

Yep, dumb as a brick. Just the way she likes 'em.

I faked being snapped to avoid paying my student loans

>>tfw got snapped while taking my father to her chemotherapy
>her chemotherapy
>her

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>tfw got snapped while taking my father to her chemotherapy
>her
Should have stayed dust for sure

>half the population was snapped
>faggot avengers tried to keep the governments in place instead of allowing anarchy to take over

Just fuck her faggot

>Test pilot
>Equipment is all kinds of fucked up, half of mission control is gone
>About to crash and burn
>Ejection system is fucked
>Got dusted right before crashing
>Undust back in my kitchen
>Wife and waited for me the whole time, get free shit from the government for coming back to existence
Thanks Thanos

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>on flight home
>fall asleep for a second
>wake up and I'm falling, with about half the people on the plane
>somehow manage to live by landing on the other passengers' carcasses
>my family isn't in the people pile
>celebrate.mp3
>get home and find out the plane crashed 5 years ago when the pilot evaporated
>I'm now being legally forced to register as a "mutant" for surviving that fall
Life is pain

>>I'm now being legally forced to register as a "mutant" for surviving that fall
NINTENDO, HIRE THIS MAN

>climbing the ladder to replace a lightbulb
>shitty ladder keep wobbling
>I fell and crashed into glass coffee table
>broken glasses on my back and have concussions
>got snapped
>three years later
>unsnapped
>back where I was, still hurt and most of my stuff gone

instagram.com/leanandcuisine?utm_source=ig_profile_share&igshid=16ivs86mg610b

Here we go

What was getting snapped like for you Dustfags?

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Guys, my little 14 year old brother keeps talking about this female superhero who swoops down from the sky while him and the other kids are playing in the park and offers to fly them to Disneyland. He said she wouldn't tell them her name but insisted they call her "Mommy". I'm getting a little concerned.

fucking supes, Ennis was right, they are a menace

it's the addams fa-mi-ly
>get snapped
>get unsnapped

My daughter was having surgery when she got dusted. I ran to the hospital when I heard people were coming back to find her dead with blood everywhere.
Fuck you avengers. You could have warned us that you were going to do this. I could have made sure there was a team of medics waiting for her...

I used to keep seeing this guy in random places all the time, but I haven't seen him in a while. I wonder if he's ok?

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Guys, how do I get off of this shitfuck planet? That wizard guy was directing people back through the portals and I thought I was going back through the portal back to Krylor, but I ended up in some place called "Nor-Way" and I find out I'm still on fucking earth. Where is the space port on this world? I can't even get a package of Zarg-Nuts here, this is bullshit.

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felt like when u lose air, but around your whole body

go back to kreechan you fucking bluenigger

I'm Krylorian you Earth-ape, I'm not even blue!

I just realized that my boyfriend looks exactly like my uncle.

Does that make it weird?

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That's a strange thing. Good thing they aren't the same person, though.

> Saw Wanda at Vision's funeral.
> Literally just her on her own.
> No one gave a shit and didn't turn up; apparently Sam had to check the dates of his milk, and Clint had go get some biscuits for his wife. Rhodey was picking his nose so couldn't cancel that.

Hah imagine if your boyfriend and uncle were the same person. That'd be hilariously awkward.

What were they thinking? This was really offensive

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Imagine your boyfriend banged you and your aunt hahaha totally weird.

>playing vidya online
>kill some drunk guy with a weird accent
>he gets pissed
>tell him to git gud
>my house gets destroyed by a lightning storm a few hours later
>only a bunch of empty beer bottles remain

>thinks the sokovacaust actually happened
get a load of this goy

Have you all heard about that new hero Mysterio? He looks like such a nice and honest person. New Ironman right there.

wakanda is a mossad psy op
there's no way negroes could be THAT advanced.

OpenBordersForWakanda

who wants to help me attain the infinity stones?

Well he's no Spider-Man

Based, I did the same to taxes

>random shithole in Africa
>we're told they're really advanced despite evidence to the contrary
>normies buy it anyway

My date got dusted right in front of me. It's okay though, she wasn't all that interesting, and I got a free meal out of it.

Got some weird looks though. I guess that's what happened when you eat your dead dates food that still has some of her dust on it.

>Warriors get snapped.
>NBA is saved for five years

Thank you Thanos.

nigger tier
i will get the infinity gauntlet and every single infinity stone specifically so i can dust you
twat

I CANT WAIT FOE THIS UNIVERSE TO FINALLY FLOP

>favorite streamer's family gets dusted
>disappears for weeks
>comes back after two months
>mental breakdowns every other stream
Watching a bitch cry during a stream is too much. Glad she gave it up when everyone returned.

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What about Bruce Banner? Weren't they a thing?

You should have seen how she freaked out about it when she came back. I just can't figure out why she was so freaked out about it, it was perfectly good food, why waste it just because it's a little dusty?

GTFO WAKANDIANS

Guys, Wtf, i got snapped, and now that i'm here im seeing kids taking photos with THAT MOTHEFUCKING GREEN MONSTER, what the absolute fuck?

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>be 15
>have 15 year old GF
>sometimes bang because she wants the D
>she gets snapped
>never move on
>she's back
>and now I'm 20 dating a 15 year old girl begging for my cock
>can't to it because I don't want to go to jail
>loser her again because I won't bang her

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You guys are completely missing the point that no one is going to unsnapped until 2023

Shut this thread down

What if Thor had decided to fly down, rip off the roof of the White House, and grab the President right out of the Oval Office? Who would've stopped him?

>believing tabloid gossip
Dude the picture on the cover has a fucking raccoon holding a gun. The fact that you believe that shit shows how retarded you are.

Let me guess - you probably think mutants are real too?

Hulk would do it

>raccoon with a gun
haha are normalfags so dumb they buy that shit? hahaha

dudes, we live in a world where norse gods and giant hulking iradiated monsters exist. is a space raccoon with a gun so hard to believe?

and also there's A FUCKING TREE, lmao, Normalfags are dumb, i bet that guys believes in that "Latveria" bullshit just because Wakanda is real

>norse gods
lmao he's stuck on 2012 /pol/ rumors
>Wakanda is real
oh no, they've gotten to you too lolololol

>rumors
nigga have you watched the news at all?

I saw The Hulk at a grocery store in San Francisco yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.

He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”

I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.

The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

>using this copypasta for the Hulk of all people when he's a certified nice guy

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That's why I'm Ant-man's fan

Which channel?
I swear if you say DailyBugle.com I will fucking die from laughing

Fumofu?

Amagi

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At least Spider-Man went with the snap. He crashed my backyard party a few years ago.

Holy shit, was that your house where the chubby indian douche got expelled after shouting Penis Parker at that poor nerd boy? I saw that video on youtube a while back.

Isn't it kinda strange that almost all Palestinians have been dusted, while jews only lost like 2-3% people?
How are they going to explain Palestine, that they are occupied all their land now?

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Yeah, Spider is an asshole, he didnt fix my grandpa's air conditioner when he broke it with his webs

I loved FMP Fumofu more then all other seasons. It works better as silly commedy anime.

*DABS*

I agree, though as an /m/ guy FMP still managed to be good with it's other seasons.

How the hell is Japan handling the snap anyway?

Nah, but that was in my neighborhood. It's a good thing we have JJJ to call out Spider-Man on his bullshit.

Apparently bitch exes still technically own their property even if the unsnapped party left his and moved there to take care of it and her child for five years, and can try to sue him for trespassing, theft, and all that shit.
The court has to throw this out right?

Did your uncle, how should I put it, ever touch you? Inappropriately?

Some fag killed all criminals here. I guess he read wiki about Furuta.

Then she didn't love you, mate.

Pack your fings and get out of me building.

You mean you saw the same old guy everywhere? Right, I bet you believe in crisis actors too, conspiracist nutjob.

That's the point, and it's honestly hilarious to imagine Professor Hulk trying to walk out of a 7/11 with like 15 Milky Ways

do you guys think britain has their own captain america?

Yeah, it called Captain Pakistan

>THE SEETHING WHITE AMERIKKKANS IN THREAD AGAIN
All you so fucking predictable. Just can't handle there's a nation unquestionably better than yours.
Did you know, months before the Snap, there was a coup in Wakanda? Some crazy guy who grew up in America that wanted to send our weapons across the world to destabilize the nations. I supported that man, because I knew actually trying to help you buffoons is nothing but wasted effort. And all those reports of the amount of vibranium we have and what it can do? Your media doesn't even know how much of a paradise Wakanda is. Keep being mad you were born in the wrong country, imperialists.

Deep lore

WE
WUZ
KANGS

Do you have Starbucks in your shit hole?
That's what I thought.

Wakanda is a fictional nation made up by jews

>tfw this is actually factually correct

>mfw wagecuck zoo staff loser about to be booted from my apartment pre Snap
>mfw robbed a bunch of banks a week into The Snap
>mfw went to my old job and released the animals that survived for shits n giggles
>mfw stole one of the cheetah cubs from the breeding program because why the fuck not
>mfw the general anarchy, disorder, and disappearance of a massive chunk of the local police force and street heroes let me get away with it all
>mfw I was able to quit my job and live it up rent free in some schmuck's house for a few months before the power and water went out and I had to buy my own place
>mfw I still have an easy two hundred million in my offshore account after I bought a few houses and land all over the world, a private plane and three big ass boats
>mfw years later no one has been able to trace my crimes to me
>mfw even if they could I've got some of the best lawyers money can buy on speed dial

Thanks based Thanos. Wish the guy was still around so I could treat him to a beer or two . Think I might buy my own comics and games shop since I've got money to throw around. Who else /living large/ in post-Snap world?

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I don't know if I should be mad at Thanos or made at the Avengers. I was fapping and was dusted right as I was about to climax. Then I come back, nut right back of the head of some chick sitting at her computer in what was my apartment. I end up getting arrested and now I'm on a fucking registry. This is such fucking bullshit.

I want to know how you got a job working at EA

I don't understand

>her

The secret is to tell them to add more loot boxes.

Yeah, such paradise, I bet you give out free money, don't you, Mr. Nigerian Prince?
Kek, and what would he be called? Captain Bobby?

You were all lied to. It was really the Rapture all along.

Yea for like a year and a half before he disappeared. Probably learned about her fuck boys

Huh that's weird, the same thing happened to my neighbor. Poor guy was a single dad, came home to find his house destroyed and his kid dead with his arms pulled off and shoved up his ass. The other neighbors swear it was Thor but I was there and saw the guy that did it. He looked a bit too fat to be Thor, plus he even have a hammer, the guy had some weird axe thing.

>plus he even
didn't. Didn't even have a hammer. Sorry, a bit drunk from catching up with my mates that were snapped.

Based as fuck

>Survived the snap.
>My family had already passed.
>Shit is lonely, yo. But some things work out.
>Find a nice house, super cheap.
>Meet a lovely Asian QT3.14, I love her.
>Get a nice job at the hospital.
>Suddenly, the snap is undone I guess?
>Previous homeowners are suing me for the house back.
>Asian QT3.14 left me to return to her fiancee.
>Get fired from the hospital because the former employee returned and they felt bad for him.
>Just got a letter saying that I need to return my car to the previous owner, since he had been snapped but is back.

Fuck you faggots! YOU SHOULD HAVE STAYED SNAPPED!

There was a rumor that it was Hawkeye under a new identity, would he give a shit about Furuta?

What the hell happened to my hometown?! Why it's called New Asgard now!?

This is where you get intel now, Sharon? What are you doing here?

Same but for child support

How is it illegal?

Based

Based copypasta poster

Remember how we tried to warn you about illegal immigration? Remember how you called us paranoid Nazis in return?

This is the future you chose, user.

not much
all the decent developers were dusted and we ended with Fornite Ultra and Madden 2024

Looking for the infamous hacker known as Yea Forums, obviously