So I'm glad that the Avengers saved the day again, but I almost wish that they hadn't, is that wrong? After years of depression and therapy, I'd finally managed to move on from the loss of my wife and kids. Found myself a new wife, and we were expecting a baby in a few months. Except that now, suddenly my dead wife and kids came back, and are kind of miffed about the whole situation, as is my new wife. Also, my parents came back to life too, and are demanding I give them my inheritance back or else they'll sue me, they're especially mad that I'd sold their house. I had quit my previous high-paying but stressful job because I no longer had as many mouths to feed and wanted to do my dream job that didn't pay as much, but with all these developments I'm suddenly in dire financial straits and don't know what to do.
Also, my town is going through a food shortage, we'd been producing half as much food and it's going to be a while before our farms can go back to their previous production rates. Suffice to say, the price of everything has gone way up. I hear my town isn't alone in this regard.
ITT: You are an inhabitant of the MCU
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Don't worry user, Stark Industries is giving money. I also heard that someone in San Francisco is giving giant food to everyone.
I miss mom. Dad's drunk again.
The person I owed money to got dusted and was brought back, do I still owe them?
Well duh
>tfw all my shitty roommates and my landlord got dusted so I've been living in my empty house rent-free for the last five years
I have so much disposable income now, I never want this to change.
I've been jacking off in City Hall for 5 years now because it's been empty the entire time, and suddenly everybody comes back, how fucked am I guys?
I had the same problem, but because of all the chaos, he lost the paperwork that proved I owed him money, so now he can't do anything about it.
>have to suffice with the half-finished steven universe movie with fan storyboards wedged in because half the staff got thanos'd
god, there's nothing to fucking do around here.
>My boyfriend was beating me, the day he got turned to dust, I was finally free
>He's back now and I'm scared, I think there's someone at the door
>Oh god it's him, he's yelling at me, telling me to let him in
>I can't, I won't
>He's got a gun and-
>my friend committed sucide because his wife got dusted
>his wife came back three days later
fuck, man
>food shortage
Wouldn't the half of all farm animals and crops that were magicked away be back? There shouldn't be any food shortages.
The dusting proved fetuses were separate human being because they stayed while their mothers were dusted. Roe V Wade was finally overturned after empirical evidence and the fact having to clean up fetal carcases will fuck anyone up. Now with everyone brought back from the dusting we've gone back to child murdering because of the population surplus.
Feels bad man
I hard a rumor that Captain America is retiring and handed his shield over to The Falcon, any truth to this?
It’s a mixed bag.
>I was living with my parents when they got dusted, and ironically that was the kick in the pants I needed to become fully independent when the alternative was being homeless.
>I couldn’t afford to keep up with the mortgage with my job at the time so I had to sell the house and get a second job to have enough to rent an apartment.
>I finally met the girl of my dreams, we got married, got a house, and we’re expecting our first kid in a few months
>Then my parents came back and are pissed at me for selling their house
>Now I have to put them up until they can get their own place again.
>At least they’re happy I finally became independent and started a family of my own
this is a retarded post even by Yea Forums standards
think so. that final battle really prematurely aged the guy. i'd still tap that, but you know
Fortnite is doing just fine :^)
I swear to fucking god, noobslayer. I swear to fucking god.
Apparently everyone I know survived the dusting, everyone except me that is. All my friends and family were spared, but not me, nope, I'm the one who gets turned into dust for five fucking years. What are the fucking odds?
They move on?
Small drama so sad for all of you I nearly died. I was working when some politicians bodyguard appeared and as far as he was concerned I magically appeared in front of him in a secure area all I hear is screaming from behind me to get down on the ground.
They didn't even realize I was gone until after I came back. Talk about adding insult to injury.
I bet Spiderman did this
@JJJ pls go and stay go
So those of you who vanished, where were you when you left and reappeared?
>taking a shower
>my body started turning to dust
>freaked out a bit
>felt like I passed out or something
>woke up to realize my bathroom had none of my towels, shampoo brands and all the other stuff I keep there
>they'd all been replaced by someone else's stuff
>tried to find my clothes
>some kid that I'd never met before saw me and screamed
>her parents heard
>they were scared and mad as hell at this wet naked guy appearing inside their apartment out of nowhere and frightening their kid
>I was scared and mad as hell at this random family appearing inside my apartment out of nowhere and redecorating my entire home
>awkward times for everyone involved
I later learned my apartment had been sold to these people not long after I vanished. Luckily my dad hadn't vanished, so he'd been able to keep his home and some of the most important things from my old apartment. I had to move back to my parents until I can get my own place again.
LARP threads are so cringe
>be me
>live with parents
>was sleeping after work during snap
>was on couch
>wake up
>sit up and yawn
>Dad walks into living room
>drops his beer and stares at me like I'm a ghost
>notice he's got pepper colored hair now, lost weight
>nearly crushes me in a hug and sobs
>don't know what the fuck happened
I felt like fucking Rip Van Winkle once I found out, Jesus Christ. My sister is now older than me too, I think? Or am I still older? Fuck I don't know.
everything about superheroes is cringe, silly faggot
>crops
It only dusted creatures with a soul.
They've been producing food for 3 billion people and suddenly it's 6 billion overnight
Guys, there's this kid named Parker that look so cute. I just want to fuck him in his tight little asshole. Who should I hire to kidnap him? He seems to be living alone with his aunt. So, someone cheap should be okay right?
>stable, high-paying job
>splurged on a lambo from good altcoin investments
>hear crash outside
>my fucking lambo is destroyed
>there are splattered corpses all over the place
>one landed on my lambo
>found out the Avengers brought everybody back
WHY DID I CHOOSE TO LIVE UNDER A FLIGHT PATH
>Driving on the freeway
>suddenly dozens of people appear instantaneously all around me
>carnage everywhere
Man, it must have sucked to be dusted while driving
I killed myself because I couldn't live without my wife and friends. Now they're back and I am dead.
>Yea Forums was hell all along
I knew it.
So are they going to keep those giant memorial stones they made a few years back, or will they be taken down now? Seems a bit weird to have massive gravestones for people who aren't dead after all.
I blame the fact that half of all game developpers died, and a good chunk of those that remained were so traumatized that nobody ever bothered making a better game, so Fortnite just kept doing what it was doing with no competition.
well, some of them are still dead. friend of mine was on a plane when the pilot and all the flight attendants evaporated. and the plane hit a starkco pop-up shop.
The new Avenger is so hot. The blue robot one? Anyone know her story?
Do you think id Software will go back to developing Doom Eternal now? I've been waiting for that for 6 years
>He seems to be living alone with his aunt
I've seen his aunt, kid's lucky as hell. Living with a hot single older woman in a cramped apartment... I know how this story ends.
Can you believe that nobody at Epic Games got dusted? I wonder why.
I'm not sure about that new emote of the guy breaking down and sobbing. Seemed a bit long.
I've read from some crackhead conspiracies by /pol/ types that Thanos isn't real and the decimation was committed by the ((elite)) to get rid of enemies of the state, leaving the Avengers alive for plausible deniability. If it's anything like that, I guess Epic is owned by ((them))
that's not the originals, man. those are skrulls. all skrulls.
Lots of people at Epic Games got dusted. But conveniently, most of them were the greedy execs at the top. Most of the actual game designers and programmers were fine, so they were allowed to do the game the way they wanted with less bullshit from the top.
How do they explain everybody getting brought back though?
>He believes that Skrulls are real
Not this shit again. Just because aliens are real doesn't mean that green shapeshifters have to be real too.
>How do they explain everybody getting brought back though?
They mostly shut up after they all came back. I don't really go to /pol/ so I wouldn't know, but I saw a meme recently about how all the people that came back are skrulls.
>be me
>home from uni with my family and my girlfriend
>mom has always been shitty to me, but she's desperately wants me to marry and have kids
>hog dog barbecue
>girlfriend gets mayo on her lower lip
>expanddong.jpg
>rest my palm on her cheek to wipe it off
>she leans in
>and leans through my hand as she turns to this dust
>fall out of chair
>mother and father turn to dust
>little sister, who was my best friend for most of my life, runs and hugs me, dusting
>"Don't let me go, user. I'm scared"
>aloneonafridaynight.jpg
>depressed for the next six months
>going mad from loneliness
>loved my girlfriend since sixth grade, couldn't find anyone else
>eventually get my life back together
>go to my old friend's home for human contact
>help him out with his fishing business
>free calamari everyday
>great salesmen at market
>I find new friends and get my life back together
>start dating qt3.14 freckled girl
>looked and acted like my girlfriend
>buy ring to propose
>walking home from (((jew)))elry
>saw the dust again
>people were coming back
>some guy fell out of the sky two feet away from me
>roblox_death_sound.MOV
>must have been on a plane
>realize that my family must be back
>just when I was about to completely fix my life
>plan to drive down home in a few days
>with friend's town having lost 2/3 of its population, friend has to work even harder to increase food supply
>can't leave for at least a month
I just want to see my old gf again, bros.
But that's retarded, everyone came back. It's like assassinating someone to silence them and then resuscitating them. It makes no goddamn sense if getting rid of them was the goal.
[spoilers]Since we didn't hear anything about pregnant women suddenly dropping puffs or dust or of pregnant women getting dusted and leaving their fetuses behind, didn't the exact opposite happen?[/spoilers]
Nah, I was more focused on that Asian? avenger, she got these weird ass things on her head but she’s cute
the ground was covered with gut bacteria! covered!
It bothers me how little evidence there is of Thanos' existence. Like, the Avengers made their public statement when all the people vanished and they gave the official explanation on what happened, but it's still just their word. Was there ever any credible and undeniably real video footage of this guy? So many people have cellphones and cameras these days, so someone who's not associated with the Avengers must've been able to record some kind of proof about what exactly happened?
>How do they explain everybody getting brought back though?
My theory is the Avengers went rogue very recently and decided to fight back against their higher-ups. Remember that time when Captain America and Iron Man had this big fight over something or other? These guys have been known to sometimes disobey orders and do their own thing; I think they did it again.
I also think the Avengers were deep enough to know the truth about what really happened with the whole "Thanos" incident, and they were involved in setting it up back then. That means they most likely will continue maintaining the fake story that the perpetrator was Thanos; that way they won't have to reveal their own guilt in the events.
>Be me
>Be teacher
>This girl I teach admits she has a crush on me
>Can't do anything about it because she's 13
>Get dusted
>Come back
>She's 18 now and still wants me
Thanks, Thanos.
>Be me
>Love my cat (whose actually older than me believe it or not)
>Cat gets dusted
>Simultaneously happy to be alive and sad because my beloved cat wasn't
>5 years later
>Managed to move on and make a nice living despite the depressing atmosphere
>Driving home from work
>Suddenly hit something
>Get out and see my cat has returned but unfortunately got hit by my car
>Noooo.jpg
Fuck you Stark, I'll fuck your wife and daughter, stab Old Steve Rogers to death, and become the next villain for Avengers V, just you wait
do you niggers think a villain will be made because of this?
There was plenty of footage of Thanos' forces attacking New York and Wakanda, those Chitauri and Outrider things. So clearly some kind of alien shit was going on.
As for Thanos himself, we have some footage of him fighting against the Avengers army in upstate New York thanks to Wakanda super cameras recording the whole thing, although I can understand why some people wouldn't trust Wakanda.
But the real confusing thing is that the Avengers claim that they had executed Thanos 5 years ago in retaliation, so how could Thanos show up again now?
Maybe the dude had a son
Hey guys remember that health scare a few years back about fish oil supplements causing people to suddenly grow cocoons and then get super powers because of alien dna or something? Well, I suddenly woke up today and I think I can see through walls now but I've never taken taken any fish-oil and don't think I was in a cocoon at any point. What does that mean?
your cat wasn't a cat. it was a tentacled killing machine, thanos killed them all to save himself. he's in cat valhalla now.
The attack on New York by those space weirdos last year is still on YouTube. I mean, that shot happens once a week, I know, but the Avengers said those were Thanos' men, and shortly after the attack the dusting happened, so I think it's reasonable to believe it's connected and Thanos is real.
Probably.
Ststute of limitations
I worry about the #ThanosDidNothingWrong crowd. They're really pissed off now, and I fear that they might become a death-worshiping cult that tries to "cull the herd".
i saw the burned out gauntlet in the smithsonian. pretty sweet mural of thor killing him as well.
She's really cute too. God, the alien avengers are just the cutest.
where they those guys who built a church out of a leviathan skeleton? i hear chanting late some nights.
thats a pretty good setup for Hydra to make a comeback
Not if they were replaced with crisis actors, as opposed to the real dusted individuals
Just for your information that it's considered offensive to say "dusted". Trivializing a tragic ordeal like that can easily trigger people. The PC term for it is "vanished".
Didn't Thanos' arm get fused with the burned out gauntlet that's still in the Smithsonian? I wouldn't be surprised if those crazies broke in and got some DNA from it or some shit and tried to bring him back
sounds like we got a dusty ass bitch I here. Go back to Twitter.
Rumor has it that Thor has Thanos' head as a trophy in his home on New Asgard.
the official paperwork term is 'gone' actually. not that it matters, 'fucking dead' is all people actually use.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHGHHHHH FUCK I HAD FINALLY MADE SOME WEALTH WITH SO MANY GONE BUT NOW MY FORMER TWO BOSSES ARE BACK AND DEMANDING I BE PUT BACK IN MY FORMER POSITION
THIS CANT BE HAPPENING BROS
Damn did Thor get fat
>that leaked video of iron man saying goodbye
anyone else watched it?
I heard, be the legends true, he uses it as a beer coaster.
Why the fuck did Banner have to bring back Todd Howard
>dustbunny is mad because he got dusted while everyone else got to live in an underpopulated world for five years
stay mad, dustfag.
>post yfw you're not a dustfag
sure was nice of xXbossmanXpeter84Xx to film it and put it on youtube
Fortnite got a sudden surge of activity again but I still always end up queuing with that asshole noobslayer69
Okay so I went on a killing spree after the snap for a few days and managed to get rid of all the bodies. The Mayor put up some stupid wall of the names of everyone that got snapped when they were doing a roll call to find out. Well my victims names were on the wall but now everyone is back people are starting to look for them. What do I do?
Some people died in car accidents immediately after the snap. Just pretend that happened to them. But personally I hope you get caught, sicko
yeah, apparently it's actually some sort of holographic thing. God can you imagine how creepy that would be to play at a funeral, right in front of his wife and kid even. His daughter's only like four or something, she would be traumatized for life seeing a glowing ghost of her dead dad talking to her.
So... now that the dust has settled can we all agree the Snappening was the best thing to happen in the last 10 years?
I mean, sure, we all had a family member who got dusted, but so many easy jobs opened up; Economic mobility unseen since the direct aftermath of the Black Death, the US finally being forced to stop spending so much money proping up Africans and instead stabilizing itself, and most importantly the revival of religion in my area.
....and now the Avengers undid all of that.
T-Thanks.
Damn I thought you were supposed to be dead, Thanos.
Good news is enough people who got snapped were in airplanes or on the highway that their deaths might be written off; That still might leave a few others but it would regardless require someone to notice a few missing out of probably millions still
>mfw my neighbour is a dustfag and I've been banging his wife for five years since he got snapped
>mfw he comes back none the wiser and we have a chance to basically move on a pretend nothing happens, but we're still banging behind his back
imagine being a dustfag
>snappedfags already calling people literally Thanos for saying the truth
Reported your post to the FBI, S.H.I.E.L.D. and the Avengers.
i mean, the cults are religious, that's true
>I swear to Thor
all five of them are right on it
>5 years ago i was getting kicked out of my parents house for being a neet
>suddenly both of them disappear
>sad but also happy
>fast forward today
>still a neet
>suddenly my parents are back and kicks me out of their house
BROS I NEED HELP
Ok fuck all of you, I’m glad I’m back
Has anybody started triggering dustfags by snapping their fingers at random? It's pretty funny to walk into a public space and just snap your fingers to see who curls into a fetal position and starts crying.
>were you or a member of your family injured during the great vanish
>did a member of your family die due to a pilot or captain vanishing?
>if you think you have a claim then contact vanishingdirect
>everyone who vanished 5 years ago are back and they can now stand trial for the deaths or injuries they caused by vanishing
>we have an expert team who will help and guide you through your claim
>we work on a no win no fee basis
>contact vanishingdirect today and you could claim thousands that you were entitled to but not given due to the defendant vanishing
...how did you not get a job in the last 5 years? Do you know how rare it is for there to actually be a high demand for workers?
Even though they say it was suppose to be half the population, I could swear like 98 percent of my high school got dusted. But it does mean that I graduated like fourth in my class, and since it was a new york city high school that (had) been filled with some damn smart people I was able to use that to get into a way better college than I thought I would have. My only regret is never got a chance to ask this one one really qt brown girl named MJ out before she was dusted. I mean she's probably back now, like nearly every other kid there, but I'm a junior in college now.
t. Dustfag
Based and redpilled
>he didn't got a traumabucks from the government
OH NO NO NO NO NO
It’s not 50% of every location, Thor said it was the whole universe. You might have 98% of your school dusted , but another place with the same population os your school probably only lost 2%
I heard the Japs have an overpopulation problem now, hilariously enough. Kinda sad errything's back to normal.
No one in my direct family got snapped, so no traumabucks for me
You guys seem to be missing something important. Yes, everybody's back, and that's great, but did you not notice that the Avengers have a FUCKING TIME MACHINE? Do you not realize the implications of this? Time travel is real!
I know but still, it's just weird. It's like there was some conscious force in the universe that wanted nearly every person at my school to be the exact same age they were even though 5 years has passed for the rest of us for some strange purpose.
I saw someone try to do that but everyone thought it was in poor taste and they all ganged up on him. And he didn't even really manage to piss off the vanished people as much as he pissed off the other half. I mean, all the reports make it sound like the vanished people just fell asleep and woke up into a different world, while those who lived through it all had to mourn their loved ones and do their best to move on.
You're being paranoid man. Next you'll tell me that some conscious force in the unicerse made sure that all of the original Avengers survived the Snappening.
>back to normal
lol no, Africa imploded into warlord states in the last 5 years as most of their leadership or figure heads got snapped. Without France and other usual powers like China intervening the chaos has continued to now, where over a billion people that can’t be fed have reappeared. In only a month mass starvation will kick in and one of the biggest Europe refugee crisis in history will happen. This will probably throw Europe into chaos as their institutions are already strained by the return of their populations
I just kept wondering through all this where were the Justice League?
>he believes the time machine theory
no such thing. they were hoarding the gems for the last five years
Funny how even though dusties are 50% of the population they account for 98% of the crime.
if that was a time machine, it would have a clock on the side. don't you know anything about science??
Weird how Wakanda was just okay with that whole warlord thing
You would think that everyone at Epic Games would've gotten dusted. Do you think the MCU's Fortnite also had a Thanos/Avengers event in-game?
Psychological studies have shown that dustfags have a subconscious response to snapping sounds in what can only be described as mass hysteria. I think it's some cosmic shit.
They were hanging out with Caped Baldy
Your first marriage is nullified by your ex-wife's death. Her subsequent resurrection is legally irrelevant.
i was too sad to do a crime, dammit
>bang a 10/10 widow after the decimation happened
>we got married
>we got kids
>suddenly her husband and kids comesback
murder is justified in this situation right?
>the whole universe
Speaking of that, when are we gonna get opportunities to travel into outer space? We've got contact with other planets, alien invasions, and we know it's possible to travel in space and find intelligent life. But space travel is still accessible only to the super rich and famous. Any chance the tech will be in the hands of the average man during our lifetimes? I want to go on vacation to whatever planet that blue robot thing came from and see if all the girls from there are as cute.
The Supreme Court hasn't decided on that yet, we have multiple contradictory conclusions from courts across the nation.
Got fired from work today for telling a joke to people about this faggot accountant
>how many of your family can fit into a car
>7, 3 in he back 2 in the front and your dusted sister and dad in the ashtray
No regrets
I wouldn’t do that if I were you, there’s probably no laws in space. You could get shot because someone was bored
I lucked out really. I had been squatting in an abandoned law office in Hell's kitchen, and when I heard people were coming back from the snap I got worried that these "Nelson and Murdock and Paige" douches would show up to demand their office back and throw me out. But it's been weeks and they still haven't shown up. They're just gone forever or something.
>tfw work with a dustfag
>she comes back and immediately expects everyone to bend over backwards to accommodate her
>whenever she does something wrong or gets accused of anything, she uses the fact that she got dusted as a defense
>"sorry, user, only the vanished would understand"
Is anyone else already sick of dusties?
That’s because they just closed their borders again once the snappening happened. Don’t forget they are one of the only non-Abrahamics left in that area of Africa, both Sudan and Ethiopia are not friends to that country.
I know I am. Ever since my cousin came back, he keeps talking about how every day is a blessing
United Nations are still talking about what to do with these cases. They should make some kind of resolution on it sooner or later. You guys are not dealing with an anomalous freak incident; this kind of stuff happened literally everywhere in our universe, and all the countries of the world are gonna need new laws to handle this fucking mess.
I kinda hope they'll be forced to decide both marriages are equally valid, and they'll legalize polygamy/harems.
KILL YOURSELF FAGGOT IM NOT GONNA SHARE MY WIFE
I guarantee there will be a plot point in phase 6 where Wakanda is the biggest superpower in the world and helped out the rest of the world after the Snap and after the De-Snap
oh, don't get me started on those black saviors.
>a plot point in phase 6
what the fuck are you talking about? is this the dustfag brain damage people keep mentioning?
>>Wife got dusted.
>>Go to a real dark place.
>>Start going to group therapy things to not kill myself.
>>Steve Rogers visits my group about a year in, gives us a little speech on how we have to try to move on and grow.
>>There's a dustwidow in the group.
>>After the meeting we decide to go back to her place and fuck, just to try to feel more alive for once.
>>It helps.
>>I start following Rogers around in his circuit, picking up dustwidows.
>>Avengers bring everyone back.
>>Wife and I get back together.
>>Wife comments how I'm *way* better in the sack then I used to be.
>>Technically I've cucked dozens of men, several of those now-wives-again have had children.
>>Wife finds out.
>>Once she gets past the shock of it all, she finds it kind of hot.
>>Now she says she would have divorced me if I hadn't banged anyone else in those 5 years, because that's what weirdos do.
>>Probably joking, but still.
>>Feelsgoodman.
>be me
>like to snap my fingers to pass time
>people now look at me in horror when I do so; Dusties actually scream when I do it
>police go to my house and demand I stop
This isn’t fair bros I just liked to snap my fingers, I didn’t mean anything by it
>I kinda hope they'll be forced to decide both marriages are equally valid, and they'll legalize polygamy/harems.
Why would they bother? None of these people actually want to share their partners.
Welp. At least I know heaven and hell aren't real. Christ, five years of university missed completely.
So Got Dusted and turns out my girlfriend slept with Thor, unsure how to feel.
>Thor
Basically doesn't even count as cheating, you should be happy that you're eskimo brothers with the God of Thunder
Where did they get 3.5 billion crisis actors from when HALF THE PLANET WAS DEAD? It's like saying "they faked the moon landing by going to Mars"! At this point it's just more plausible that everyone actually was magically brought back to life, the idea that the government somehow faked the resurrection of half the planet makes no sense logistics-wise.
I've heard that there have been legal decisions both ways, but overall the new marriages are winning. It says "Until Death Do You Part" and they died.
Sucks to be a Dustie.
You got dusted, you were dead. Doesn't count as cheating. Just be glad she's considering getting back to you.
I just realized that my boyfriend looks exactly the same as my uncle.
Does that make it weird?
depends. how many magic glowing rocks does your timeline presently have?
A lot of us could have told you that before the snap, and probably did. Better late then never though.
>At least I know heaven and hell aren't real
How do you know that? If anything, this whole experience has proven that souls are real.
Depends, did your Uncle ever cheat on your Aunt.
If not, then it's just a coincidence.
Are you a fucking retard? It's not Live Action and it's barely even Role Playing
>literally gets snapped out of existence by glowing reality warping cosmic stones created by an ancient race of godlike creatures
>doesn't believe in an afterlife
Keep in mind non-existence is not the dame as death. For all you know, there's an afterlife but Thanos' gauntlet merely erased you rather than sending your soul to it.
Thanos did just say he broke the stones down to atoms. I'm wagering that when it comes to being a time-line anchor they still work.
Can we start enforcing the Sokovia Accords again? Nations kind of started looking the other way after the Snappening, guys like Captain America, Black Widow, and Hulk were once wanted fugitives but could now go around wherever they wanted to with no cop ever doing anything.
As said, this proved souls, and if what the Avengers said is true, than these souls were probably trapped in some sort of purgatory. I used to think that they were in the soul stone, but all the stones were destroyed.
>The Avengers save the world once again with no help from the government
>"Hey, let's tie the superheroes' hands with red tape again"
Fuck off.
>hating based Hulk
Hulk's a fucking bro now. I ran into him in a Starbucks and he was all too happy to sign autographs for my kids, even though he could barely hold the pen.
I think I got it, one of the Infinity Stones was the Time Stone, right? Maybe the second snap made all of the souls that died go forward in time, instead of moving on to the afterlife, and then reform?
under the accords the whole world would be a police state with ultron drones stationed on every street corner ready to incarcerate you for life without trial if you so much as ask someone if they think the government could be doing a better job
Things were better back when Hydra was in charge
So why is it a fucking crime to question the numbers from the vanishing? Seems like the exact numbers change all the time yet if you question this you are branded as a vanishing denier
>Get scarred by the Hulk when I was like 12 when he landed on a car in front of me and roared in my face
>Ten years later, I see him at a farmer's market buying kale
>He notices I'm terrified at the sight of him and calms me down
>We have a long conversation about being an Avenger and his latest scientific breakthroughs over tacos
>He pays for my meal
>Two days later, he sends me a friend request on Facebook
I can't believe I was scared of this guy, he's such a pussycat. Does he seem smaller and smarter to anyone else?
oh dear, i didn't think that was permenant
wonder how fucked mcu is without magic stones
The numbers vary because a lot of people died after the vanishing due to various reasons like car accidents, crashed airplanes, inevitable violence that occurs durinf times of chaos, opportunists killing people knowing they'll have the perfect cover...So now that people have started coming back, we're establishing how many of the people we once thought had vanished died for other reasons.
So now that Tony Stark is dead how long until he gets #metoo
the word cringe is cringe. this is creative and fun
That's pretty smart, user. But what non-Avenger knows for a fact how magic universe stones work?
I bet he made a move on Black Widow more than once.
i think he went to the opticians, too. i was at a work conference, he gave this interesting talk about radiation and then left via the window because he didn't fit in the door. took a whole box of free pens with him, said he kept breaking them. great guy
You know how he's actually a scientist named Bruce Bateman or something? I think that he found a balance between Hulk and Bruce.
Reading all those leaked documents felt like a real-life Metal Gear Solid. Peak kino, if I wasn't a pussy teenager.
>mfw me and my immediate family all survived getting snapped, so this changes nothing for me
i guess wages will go down again, but we have so much fucking resources anyway by this point
>everyone's back
>have to deal with my neighbors because I stole all their shit
Thanks Stark
Anyone else noticing some shit is kind of off after the losers fucked with time?
I swear there's an entire new building in Manhattan
>this whole thread
It's actually a little scary how realistic it would be
>wake up in the street
>somebody tells me I've been vanished for 5 years
oh fuck yes, i can't wait to play half life 3
I heard that his wife used to kill all of his one night stands after he was done with them
THANOS DID NOTHING WRONG
Fuck dustcucks
Fuck muslims
Fuck Stark
>Hulka Hulka Burning Love
>Cappuccino America
>Scarlet Wich
Which flavour of ice cream is your favourite? Do you think they're still going to release Black (Liquorice) Widow now that she's dead?
So got snapped, but one of the few things I remember before it happened was that there were wizards fighting that alien in New York. What’s their story?
but past thanos came forward and was killed in the future, making paradoxes on every timeline where he was supposed to destroy the stones.
When will Ant-man get an ice cream? Asking for a friend who is definitely not Ant-man
Oh gee, when you put it like that, guess all those people who got snapped away should have stayed gone.
uh. about that.
hope you like fortnite's 800000 dlc packs though
Who the fuck is Ant-Man? Do you mean Spider-Man? He's hardly A-List enough to get an entire flavour named after him.
user, I...
Sorry, user, all of Valve got dusted.
Remember how there was a giant guy before the snap, that’s apparentky what he’s called. I think that guy means Giant-Man.
Oh, that guy?
I thought that was just an Iron Man suit.
fireant fudge? it's a baskin-robbins exclusive.
I mean, the US didn’t completely implode and was well on the way to recovery, the snappening proves that half of the Human race could die and it actually wouldn’t cripple things in the long run
Spider-Man's a joke. All he does is save kittens from trees and sit around on rooftops having conversations with randoms. And have you heard his voice? He sounds like he hasn't even hit puberty yet.
Pic related -- the guy's an amateur.
Wasn't Ant-man just some really old conspiracy theory about a tiny government soldier project? I don't think he was real, user.
Got dusted. I think I saw some woman with a skull for a face. She said "Goddamnit Thanos."
>tfw Red Dead Redemption 2 came out 5 years ago and all the dustfags are late to the party
What dusting? What on earth are you talking about? I didn't notice anything, but I was kinda surprised that my parents contacted me after 5 years of absence. I thought they cut me off for good.
>dustfags keep demanding that I don't spoil movies which have been out for five fucking years
>most game companies where in shambles, nonexistant or unable to defend themselves
>Epic wasn't and went on a massive hiring and asset acquiring spree with their cash pile
>Fortnite has been the hottest shit for the past 5 years and has crossed over with every major IP that they managed to buy or work out a deal with
it's been a rough couple years and I'm not hopeful for the future of the gaming scene
year 3 was all Nintendo seasons. I have a nice Wario skin from it
All Epic employees are androids designed by Hammer Industries, they want to corner the already dwindling gaming market. Someone needs to Inform Stark or the Avengers or something, I'm scared they might break their programming.
Nobody would know a snap caused the dusting
I can't believe they had to change the name of Snapple
Ther's a youtube video of it. A wakanda soldier was recording the whole thing on his phone.
Sure we know, the Avengers gave a press release about it back when it happened. They're a credible enough a source, don't be a conspiracy fag.
it's Dapple now
>all the Mets got dusted
>not a single Yankee was
>the dusting
This never really caught on, did it? I don't think anyone ever called it the dusting. They just called it, "it" or just implied that they were referring to the event. I swear, I don't think anyone ever bothered to give a name to the event that whisked away half of everybody. Anyone ever find that strange?
Ronin referred to it as getting Thanos'd
And that was incredibly lame. Did everyone with any sort of creative sensibility at all disappear?
>Mets somehow still won
You mean Giant Man right? I know no small insect hero but there was that big guy in San Fran that one time. Want even was that about?
Pretty sure that was just a marketing stunt for Coca-Cola
Considering that's the term people used, I wonder if the public viewed Thanos as some sort of Hitler figure like most hated him, some worshipped his ideology, and the kids made fun of him and the snap
>my gamertag is Ronin
>everyone thinks that I'm emo-Hawkeye
>I just like ronins
Link the studies faggot
Sounds like you are just making shit up. Nobody that got dusted "heard" anything. They literally were just confused and "blacked out" then came back to a changed world.
Frogposters are still cringy after all these years.
>Simpsons suddenly became good again after the dusting
I'm not sure I want the dusted guys back on the show bros, even if it means getting Homer's proper voice back
>he's a dustlet
Point at him and laugh
Yeah, but we don't say the Jewish people got Hitler'd.
Well of course, Hitler didn't kill all those million Jews by himself
They're good guys, they've been witnessed teaming up with Iron Man and Spider-Man.
One of them actually goes to the local deli and I see him around sometimes. Nice enough guy, but every time he needs to pay his bill, he always seems to find a way to bum his money off someone else. Asked him once what's up with that, and he said some weird mumbojumbo about spiritual detachment or whatever.
What happened to that one robot the avengers had? Dude looked pretty cool but disappeared at around the same point as the snap.
Can a robot get dusted? Does he have a soul and couldn’t they just repair him?
i saw a really imposing wizard one time and he looked suspiciously like the surgeon who fixed my main arteries.
>wizards have secret identities
>anyone could secretly be a wizard
It's not that hard to be a wizard
Most people on this site have been wizards for years
I have a theory; he was powered by one of the Infinity Stones. Thanos killed him to snap and make the dusties.
i dunno man
my surgeon had a gf and a shiny car and everything. i don't think he'd even know what Yea Forums is.
She’s still your girlfriend after fucking a literal god? I think that says something about you.
>Family died in airplane crash where both pilots were snapped
>They didn't come back
>he doesn’t know about all the people who fell over 30,000 ft when they were unsnapped
user, I....
Nah they just found their bodies in the wreck
Did this actually happen in the film?
no
>Avengers
Oooh, here comes....Falcon. Seriously, who else is left? After that big unveiling of the Iron Man statue downtown, and rumors of the others retiring, the flyboy's the only one I've seen on the news. And the hot red chick. But she's a chick.
Guys, I'm fucked. After Iron Man died, all my Stark stock crashed. This is worse than bitcoin.
Those wizards? They seem tough. Pretty sure Hulk’s around
everyone knows these 'origin stories' are just propaganda and the government made all of the avengers in a lab. they can just cook up a fresh batch
I got dusted and now that I came back suddenly I can throw fire from my ass, wtf happened?
AW FUCK.
This unsnappening means the Boomer population just doubled, I thought they would finally die off with this
Yeah, about that giant food shit
Why the fuck are they doing that? Which chucklefyck thought it’d be good to re enact my childhood trauma, James and the Giant Peach
>get married
>buy new home
>have baby
>me and wife blackout one day and wake up in a decrepit version of our own house as if it was left unattended for half a decade
>baby skeleton in crib
>wife and I divorce out of grief
>kill self a week later
>thanks Mr. Stark
>TFW Dad died during the dust
>He didn't get dusted he just died getting surgery and the surgeon got dusted
Not fair bros
bullshit, the census guys would have found it. i'm onto you, baby murderer.
>tfw had kid on the way, had beautiful wife, had a job doing what I love (game designer)
>one day NYC is attacked by aliens again
>wife always loses her shit when this happens but I just quip about it cause I know heroes will deal with it
>heroes deal with it but now iron man is missing and the rest of the avengers are still god knows where doing fuck all
>smaller attack france, apparently vision is now AWOL.
>planet is now undefended, I get in bunker with wife and we stay glued to our tv getting updates on the invasion of wakanda
>blink
>bunker is rundown and empty.
>go inside and there's a random man in my house, he points a gun at me and calls his wife
>his wife is my wife and now I'm really fucking confused.
>wife bursts into tears and holds me like I came back from the dead
>turns out it's been 5 years. after the initial carnage wife cashed in on my life insurance and remarried some guy from her job
>She couldn't go through the pain of explaining my death so now my daughter calls her new husband daddy. They've been a family for as long as my daughter has been alive. I have no place there.
>go back to work and all gaming has become fortnite due to brain drain.
>my kid thinks I'm an old family friend and at this point I am, another man fucks my wife, and gaming is dead.
>I have literally nothing
How do we carry on after the world has moved so far past us?
The concept of lives post dusting could make amazing TV. Get on that shit disney
TFW all the mumble rap artists got dusted
We're going to have to relive mumble rap
Thanks Avengers
>Lil bro and mom got dusted.
>Had to get adopted because my dad killed himself a year after what happened.
>New family is ok, but it was clear they were missing their older daughter.
>Now 18yo, almost entering college
>Then now everyone comes back.
Man, I mean, I'm damn glad my mom and brother came back, but how will I explain what happened? How will my family deal with the fact their daughter is back as well? How can everyone move on after what happened, man?
I heard one fag who can't into math calling it "the decimation".
I'm just glad there are people in this world who will always fight for the little guy. I don't have super powers, so when everybody vanished, I thought that was just the end of it. Imagine my shock when I see the news and find out the Avengers pulled through and saved the day again. God bless them for never giving up.
Who else was there for the unveiling of the Avengers statues? I think they did a great job with Cap. By the way, has anyone seen him? It's been a few weeks since the return and I haven't heard anything about him in the news. He isn't on the run again, is he?
I heard Thanos (who somehow came back from the dead?) used the Time Stone to age him into either a baby or an old man.
Yes, you are horrible, you want your ex wife and kid dead
Honestly the quiet somber atmosphere was comfy. I liked going for a walk and seeing no one around. Now all the people are back and life is too crowded.
Speaking of the Avengers saving the day and returning everyone back, can we stop pretending now the Sokovia Accords were useful? I think had them not even happened, Cap and company who were against it would have avoided the Thanos'd in the first place.
In fact, I don't even remember what the exact date was. It was in 2018, that's all I recall. Was it late April maybe?
The biggest problem is that somebody thought they had a higher moral standing than Captain fucking America. If you're living your everyday life and you do something that Cap says you shouldn't, you're probably wrong. The Accords were fucking dumb.
>The US government was so retarded it alienated Captain Fucking America, a solider who made to be loyal for his country
The absolute state of Amerimuttistan, I don’t blame him if the rumors that he found a way back to the 1940s are true.
t. Seething Dustfag
Hey Dustfags, it is now 2023.... Yea Forums was made 19 years ago
How does that make you feel?
>tfw no new games were created so I was finally able to catch up on and finish my backlog
>Captain America
>Iron Man
>Hulk
>Ant-Man
>all Americans
You're welcome faggot, we saved the world again.
>A Man you chased out of America
>A Man who is now dead
>A Man who your military tried to kill multiple times
>A cringe Hacktivist
What a list
>mfw I'm not a dustfag
Guess the universe loves me more than you, eh, dusties?
Talk some shit whenever your country can produce a superhero.
anyone else been to the new sculpture in the park? it's just some woman holding out a stone, i don't know what it means, but there's something really nice about her smile. people keep leaving red flowers and candles on it.
>now that the dust has settled
As if, we got an extra five years on the clock, and when you die, that’ll be it for you, we get to go twice
That's Black Widow, you idiot. Don't you remember when she spilled Shield secrets and then told the gubbermint to fuck off on the news? She's the one who got the last infinity stone and gave it to Iron Man so he could snap. That's why her sculpture is holding out a stone.
>sister and som get dusted
>me and dad tried to hang on
>he kills himself in the first anniversary of the Decimation
>I got rid of our home and moved to a small apartment in the city
>4 years later and I finally think it's getting better.
>I have a girlfriend and a stable job, things to try and keep a clear head
>and hey, they're back
>after all this time they're back, alive and well.
>and I have to tell them about how dad died for nothing
I don't think I can through this again
Hey, I just passed out and woke up and it wasn't such a big deal after the initial shock, while you guys had to mourn and grow older for several years. The only thing I regret is that there are words like "dustfag" and "dustbunny", but nobody's still managed to establish a decent insult word for you guys who didn't disappear.
Serves you right for being a faggot.
>they're tearing down the monument to the dusted
What a waste of time and money.
Dustfag here, can anyone give me a quick rundown of the last 5 years?
Fortnite managed to have eighteen different seasons.
Everyone was happy, there was food and water to spare, endangered animal populations soared and everyone had jobs.
Thanks for fucking it up, dustfag.
>thanos apologists back at it again
If anyone needs to get dusted, it's you fuckers.
Seething
>gf got dusted when were having sex
>no, I don't want to talk about it
>anyway these 5 years have been some of the best I've ever lived
>I don't want to get into details but I had a pretty shitty, worthless live pre-dusting
>this sudden realization of how fragile and short life is just got me living more
>(Yes, I'm a card-carrying Thanos Sympathizer)
>Anyways
>I got a wife and a kid who I love very much and the life I always wanted, I'm working every day towards my dreams and I've never been more happy.
>I just hope all the dusted people who get back manage to understand the value of life as we did
Anyways, anyone has an idea of how to tell my wife and kid about the crack-addict naked woman who suddenly appeared moaning and cursing in our bed today?
The whole game industry got really fucked up, I mean Epic put Thanos IN Fornite
I would totally fuck that Wanda bitch
That was kinda insensitive of them wasn’t it?
We were all in a dark place, man, it was funny at the time.
Who else is going to name their kid Anthony? I know like 3 people who are naming their kid that already
I was gonna name mine Morgan, but now that Morgan Stark is the Most Famous Little Girl I'd look like a bandwagoner.
>13 year olds are now technically legal
Steven all the way.
Par for the course for Californians
No offense, but are you sure something else didn't happen to your friend? I was taking helicopter flying lessons lessons when I got dusted. My almost going steady girlfriend was waiting to pick me up from that; apparently she too got dusted and we both came back to life on the ground in the airport parking lot. She was wondering where the fucking hell her car was.
>, endangered animal populations soared
No they didn't, their population got split in half too. In fact, demand for rhino horns from retarded rich guys with erectile dysfunction actually went up because of that.
I'm gonna name my daughter Natalia, without Black Widow's sacrifice to get the Soul Stone, nobody would have come back.
YOU got dusted. Passengers didn't. They just crashed and died.
The monument in my town simply replaced the sign that said "To the fallen, you are not forgotten" with one that said "Welcome back, you were not forgotten".
At least you didn't get arrested after reappearing in an occupied shower.
I just heard that Cap retired. I'm going to miss hum, guys. It was nice knowing that there was someone in the world with the power to make real change who was honest and truly good. We're not going to get another Steve Rogers.
Oh my god, I'm so sorry, man. This shit has been crazy; I didn't think of that...
At least they aren't going to tarnish his legacy by making the name a franchise or something.
>almost died because my family threw my dust into the lake I played in when I was a kid
I mean I appreciate the gesture folks, but I would've fucking died if I didn't know how to swim. And did you hear about those guys who woke up in a landfill after Disney vacuumed everyone who got dusted at their parks and just threw them away? Shit's wild.
user they had been producing enough for 8 billion, they had probably eradicated hunger completely and the 5 years of recovery for people probably will ensure crops will be more sustainable
Lol, tell them to fuck themselves, they didnt show up for work for five years, their asses are fired.
>endangered animal populations soared
Fucking dustfags outing themselves. Half of every species died, so many already scarce animals died from a lack of food, which was also halved, by a lack of mates or a herd to travel with, or by opportunistic hunters.
I heard a rumor they were gonna make those comics of him again
Bro, your wife was legally dead that means that marriage contract is null and void. Death til you part, not "but not in the case that I somehow cheat death and come back"
I wanted to be an Avenger so bad, but without Cap there, I don't think it'll be worth it.
Man, that'd be cool! I never managed to afford any of the originals after they jumped in price when he came back.
Yeah, with him MIA and Tony Stark dead it's just not the same.
M-maybe he'll come back again?
Spill the beans user, what cool shit can you do that made you wanna join?
>be one of the vanished, show up 5 years later, still 30.
>Some edgy faggot snaps his fingers at me with a shit-eating grin.
>Look at him like the retard he is, confused.
>he shouts "Triggered dustflake?" And says out loud "Le maow" Giggles and runs away
>mfw
>role playing
Yikers!!!!
I can read minds. I mean, like, not everybody's. I can only read my own right now, but I just have to train.
>live in Manhattan
>be 2012
>fucking alien invasion that makes 9/11 look like a birthday cake candle
>fuck off upstate
>wake up one day to a dusty, bug-infested house
>fucking giant alien space ship emerges in the fucking sky down the street and jizzes missiles all over the place
Why does this keep happening to me? The fight going on down there was pretty sweet though.
>dcfag butthurt that his universe is so boring nobody wants to be in it
Here's hoping.
>company wars out of nowhere
Don’t be a retard, faggot. It’s embarrassing regardless of company
>was walking around in a crowded mall when the de-snap happened
>suddenly thousands of people started appearing INSIDE other people
>watched in horror as the returning people blow up mall goers by coming back to existence within them
>barely made it out that day alive by hanging off an escalator while waiting for the nightmare to end
Man those fucking idiots sure could have announced their plan to revive everyone ahead of time!
As if we don’t have threads pretending what it’s like to live in Gotham. Newfag
They already have one of those. Sorry user.
>walking outside
>see Asgardnigger
>day ruined
>not knowing nature grows and expands faster
>not knowing that due to the half of us being gone pollution dropped because the Chinese and Africans got it hard
Dustfag please
>go outside
>see Mutants
OH HELL NAW MODDAFUCKAS. WHERE'S MY MAN FALCONCAP
Why not give them Mars or something. Asgardnogs are ruining the planet
There was even a line with Steve saying the waters were cleaner because there were fewer boats
Thanos was right
>Underachiever my entire life
>Applied to a shitload of universities before the dusting, rejected at every one
>Then the dusting happens, and suddenly every Uni in America wants me
>5 years on, actually kinda doing OK, still 2 years left before I'm done
>Suddenly everyone is back
>Suddenly Uni doesn't have enough room for all the students who they let continue where they left off
>They kick me out because my grades weren't good enough compared to other people who just returned
This is bullshit.
Seriously though how the fuck is there a literal race of gods living in Earth and we are doing nothing about it?
We could easily achieve immortality or something close if we get their technology and genes.
It's not like they got much to fight back with.
>Nothing at all is cleaned up five years later
>Power is fine though. Never lose power.
Dude, did you see Thor from the footage? Dude’s still got it, he even made noobmaster69 cry
priorities
>got dusted
>come back
>ask my parents what happend becuase room is suddenly incredibly dusty
>they say they don't know and i was in my room for a really long time
I saw on the news later that half the earth had dissapeared and realised i must of been one of them
>mfw i realised my parents never checked on me in 5 years
But do you ever feel like you didn't come back the same? Like things are...different now? It's always raining at my aunt's house now. Weird stuff at school - I mean, everyone at my school are kids in my school district who got dusted and they all had to put us somewhere. But the other day, this kid's locker just got frozen over?? And this other kid on the basketball team somehow made it to the other side of the court in a blink of an eye, but I think I'm the only one who saw that.
The other morning I woke up and I remember having a nightmare but somehow all my blankets got shredded?
Has anything weird been happening to you guys, too?
Besides the fact that even though I'm technically 21 now, the new Recovery Act says I'm not allowed to buy beer until I'm 26. What a load of bull.
>/pol/
Rent free
>Somehow survived
>Most people I knew were dusted
>So depression was a thing
>Bought cheap SF and NYC real estate though with my inheritance
>Figured in the last ten years we had the Avengers appear suddenly out of nowhere, literal aliens
>Time travel probably isn't that far out if a fat cat CEO flies around in a suit and vaporizes aliens
>We'll probably get the vanished back somehow
>Everyone reappears
>Suddenly real estate in America's most crowded market is valuable again
>Have to hire security guards to kick people out, but suddenly I'm at least an eight figure man
I'm having an issue though with people reappearing in a renovated wall and suffocating. Kind of bumming me out right now.
>literal race of gods
The Asgardians aren't Gods. They're just powerful aliens that we humans confused with Gods.
underage leave
>boss got dusted
>I got promoted
>never trained
>get fired
>sweet severance package
>go to Thailand
>get herpes from ladyboy prostitute
>everyone comes back
Fuck that happened to me too, almost makes me feel bad for dusties.
Almost.
Her name was Natasha dumbass
maybe in your timeline. In my timeline she was called natalia
Anyone seen what Thor looks like now? Dude really let himself go.
Nope, her full name is Natalia Alianovna Romanova.
>not knowing nature grows and expands faster
horseshit. The entire problem is humanity has been expanding way too fast for over a century now. Half of the human population was still 4 billion. That's 1970 numbers. Our growth is fucking exponential
I got dusted in the middle of my Cellular Biology lecture. When I came to I found myself sitting in the lap of a rather large black student. It was super awkward for both of us.
Turns out, since I got dusted, my student loans were forgiven, so I don't have e to pay them back! Decided that I didn't want to pursue college anymore, so I went out and got a job with a local plumber's
Did you not pay any attention to the movie. Black Widow stated definitively that Thanos wiped out half of ALL living things.
Not to mention Hawkeye being draw to a tree with birds in it that had not been there before Hulk's snap.
I think we should. They can serve as a reminder that no matter what, we should cherish the people in our lives, because they could be gone at any moment.
Hey I do repairs on those, they sound like the guy from the Blacklist.
I swear to God if I hear one more hack comedian joke about the horrible tragedy when some inhuman monster put on a glove, snapped his fingers and brought his mother-in-law back to life
Sandler’s already planning a comedy with Stiller. Boy did those guys land back on their feet quickly after being dusted.
So when did Norway became this "New Asgard"?
>tfw a realtor
>tfw you spent 5 years selling the properties of dusted people because there were so few to dispute ownership
>tfw you helped multiple people get into neighborhoods/homes they never would have in the old economy
>mfw everyone comes back
HOW THE FUCK DO I WORK THIS
So, how DID everyone come back exactly?
Magic rocks.
You know how a couple years back Hulk got as smart as he is strong? He took over as the leader of the Avengers and fixed everything.
Yeah, things got weird while you were gone. The Hulk's like an instagram celebrity now. Also, I sincerely hope you weren't a Trump supporter because we had a lot of immigration while you were gone.
According to the Avengers who are willing to speak, pretty much the same way they went away in the first place.
When the dusting happened, I was in the car with my brother and father. My father dusted and the car crashed into a brick wall. It killed my brother (who was in the front seat) and crushed my legs and made me a cripple. My mom and sister both snapped as well, but my uncle didn't, which is the only thing that prevented me from suicide. Now suddenly my mom, dad, and sister all came back but my brother is still gone and my legs are still paralyzed. Why the fuck couldn't the Avengers reverse the 5 year period?
How did Epic Games bargain with Thanos so that they would be exempt from the snap?
>come back from being dusted
>steam has shut down while the epic games store is thriving
Goddamn it all
Hello there my fellow friendens. Anyone know where I can possibly get my hands on some Vibranium? It is for, how you say, The Science.
If you can please email me at WernerVonOttomeyer@[email protected] please.
They’re not gods (except for Thor) They can’t make things perfect.
>Cap mention a pod of whales in the Hudson River
>no ships no men no pollution nature can thrive
Thanos did nothing wrong
Real fucking funny user.Really though, how’d they come back?
This is the most fuckin immediate real problem
Happens so fuckin times (at least in MX) because wife/husband kidnapped by some cartel, after a year your friend say goodbye and a few months later wife appears (after being raped/prostituting)
Holy shit this sad world.
>be me
>Really need to take a wet shit
>Rush to bathroom
>Feel a bit drowsy
>Chalk it up to me being to constipated from playing to much fortnite
>Pull down pants before sitting down
>Preparing to let out the worst shit in history
>Everything gets blurry
>Snap back to reality
>I sit on the cock of a large black man
>I let out the shit directly into into the pee hole of the black man
>He screams in both anger and fear
>I get up from his cock I immediately
>I run out of the bathroom
>See my big titty goth gf squat farting on to a baby without realizing it
My life is a comedy
Hey, so I heard that some guy called Hank Pimm(?) is making giant food with his fancy Pimm Particles. I'm a little concerned about trying it out though. I can't help but think about Harry Potter transfiguration rules and how you probably shouldn't eat/drink anything that was magically fucked with because it might revert to its normal size in your stomach?
Anyone heard of any health related issues with this Pimm food?
Back after 5 years, what the hell has changed?
Did Spice & Wolf get a season 3 yet?
>half the population gets dusted for 5 years
>Yea Forums's still up
wtf
Yeahhh baby surely bloodborne 2 was released by this date.
Phew! Kinda nice to experience a time-skip in person. I wonder if Berserk is finished yet?
>get snapped by Thanos
>now forced to come back and return to my worthless existence of debt, suicidal thoughts, and dead end jobs I'm inevitably fired from
Can we sue the Avengers Initiative?
>your favorite manga was cancelled while you were snapped because the mangaka committed suicide
Nobody's been able to confirm whether Muira was snapped or just playing more goddamn idles, but either way there hasn't been a new chapter in five years.
The government is passing a bill that makes it so, legally, 2019-2023 doesn't count for legal deadlines. Screw me for paying off my bills on time.
>girlfriend got dusted when we were both 14
>came back last week
>she's trying to act like nothing happened
Fuck that shit, was I really that dumb when I was her (we were both her?) age?
That's not really that different to his release schedule pre-snap though.
Hey, so bigger issue though.
For people who were around 17 years old pre-snap and were dusted...can they legally drink now that they're back? wtf is the world going to do with ID date of births for the dusted?
Dude, some little whinny faggot from my old high school (his name was Peter so we called him Penis) came back last week and tried to use his ID to buy beer from me. Noped that shit out, not going to get fined for some dumb teenager.
But never mind that, not five minutes later, fucking Spider-Man swung in to buy beer! Not shitting you! Probably off to celebrate with his surviving Avenger friends.
At least you slept through the worst part. Disintegration is fucky as hell, hand to god.
>good game dev teams shut down after the snap
>no major games have come out since 2018
Fucking Fortnite is the only AAA game that still really gets updates. I hope the undusted dev nerds get back to work ASAP.
>wife got dusted
>was two years younger than me
>came back last week
Now I technically got a trophy wife, suck it
You realize we will peak, right?
Replacement rates will even out as birth rates, almost universally, are falling.
Most aren't even powerful.
>been sitting in my friend's flat for five years, rent-free
>nobody bothered to turn off the power
>made some money off shit I sold online
And nobody can prove I didn't get snapped. Feels good.
just use Ctrl+s when typing nextime bruh
All of those alien bastards look the same
They say Rocket is an alien, but he's clearly a Stark AI enhanced fucking normal raccoon. It's PR to make us believe #NotAllAliens.
How did Banner build another one of those Universe Gloves? And build more of those powercells?
Guys! Why didn't anyone tell me five years had passed? There must have been a Playstation 5 out by now, right?
You actually believe that shit about the Raccoon Stark made to replace him on the Avengers being an alien?
Hey lads. Got some time at an internet cafe finally.
So I'm back after allegedly having been "dusted" or whatever. Was shitposting on here at the time of the event and when I came back I fell on my ass. Not only is my desk and chair gone, but my fucking laptop and more importantly my 2TB hard-drive chock full of tv shows, movies and games is absent.
If that wasn't bad enough, my room's had a complete makeover and there's a toddler screaming bloody murder.
I'm then kicked out of my own fucking apartment with nothing to my name except the clothes on my back. Everyone I knew is gone and because my phone is missing too, I couldn't even get in contact if I wanted to.
The only thing with my name on it that I can find is a fucking memorial stone. And even that took the better part of a month to find. You know how hard it is to find one out of 4 billion fucking names??
Why the fuck didn't they have a digital version you could use a search function on?
I think I liked it better when I was dust. I couldn't even tell anything had happened.
Lol, he believes that time travel shit
Banner and Stark had the powercores to the device Thanos used, it just took them five years to figure out how to make another device. And it actually killed Stark to use it.
Sony actually got put on hold the whole time
But now that they're back from being far from home, I bet we're gonna see a lot of Sony products everywhere
That dude used to beat his wife, IIRC
Speaking of which, she's alive again?! Did she somehow get dusted before or what?
Shit. Well, i guess that's understandable. I gotta figure out where to live in the meantime.
Ehh, ehh's no time to eat vegan and organic shit while everyone is settling back in, ima get some giant avocados and make guacamole for charity.
T'Challa is back fucking up global relations again
I'm gonna miss five years of Wakanda actually having good leadership under M'Baku
TMZ says Thor got fat anyways
Are we gonna have to change the calendars or something? Because the last few fucking years have been too much.
Alien invasions, wormholes opening all the time, the snappening, the return, evidence of pan dimensional aliens and extra terrestrials?
What do we tell our kids?
"Son, death could come at any moment.Because ALIENS."
Fun Fact: Stephen Strange is actually a world-class surgeon. Or was. Then he got into a wreck or some shit and got magic powers from it?
I dunno, same thing happened to Dr. Bruce Banner.
I didn't want to come back. Fucking Avengers.
Is anyone else getting tired of these weird PYMRATIONS they keep handing out? Massive rice beans, massive slabs of semi cooked beef, you have to like handle it yourself at home...
When can we get real food again?
>seized on chaos five years back to kill dickhole neighbor, buried him in his own backyard for his many slights against me, everyone assumed he got dusted
>mfw everyone else is back now and people are beginning to ask questions
Stephen Strange doesn't really do... well, anything that I'm aware of. I think he's a monk or something? Maybe he has to charge up and that's why we never see him leave his temple-house?
Did he even get dusted?
It was literally just Dr. Banner and Tony Stark finding a way to make those stones in a lab, user. I'm thankful, but up until the reactor killed Tony Stark, it wasn't that heroic.
That wasn't Thanos, it was a member of his race, dumbass. He detected Dr. Banner and Stark using Thanos's erasing device that I guess they finally reverse-engineered after 5 years.
Ant-Man is just a Stark bot and you fucking know it
The guy "inside" it was hackivist Scott Lang, obviously overseeing it off-site
Fuck the Avengers Initiative. We need the XCOM Project.
So these fucks are two for two on trying to kill us? Sounds like genocide time for the purple people eaters.
Second Depression, Wakanda helped out a bit for the first fucking time ever, the Avengers helped stop a few wars (and added a fucking robot raccoon Stark made?), and then Dr. Banner finally got his replica stones made and brought everyone back, but I guess the device backfired and killed Tony Stark?
Named my kid Bruce after Dr. Banner. He's the one that made more stones, afterall.
>be me
>dust right as I'm walking to bed
>reappear and there's some couple having sex there
Awkward
Photos show that Banner's arm is all fucked up. Stark tried to steal the glory, they got in a fight, and for a cover story (((they))) made up ANOTHER alien attack and painted Stark as a martyr.
Don't believe me? Look at the footage of the "attack": aliens from the Battle of Wakanda AND the Battle of New York back in 2012? REALLY?!
They're getting Dr. Banner on SNL next week, it's gonna happen straight from the source, user
>Wakandan aid
Funny how it all seemed to go to the American south, not a penny for us Great Lakes fags.
Fuck, we need our own Avengers up here.
>be me
>my whole family got dusted in the snap.
>Used to live with my redneck parents who would constantly scream at random strangers on the streets
>decided to use this to change my life for the better
>since the cost was low I moved to Wakanda and bought a apartment there.
>meet a girl in the city,she was beautiful white hair(some trend that started because some God of wind or something)
>we hit it off pretty well and started dating,some years later we got engaged
>the ceremony was beautiful you guys,we had some sort of Flower I had to eat and where blessed by a ...Panther God
>had our honey moon on New Florida,it's better after all the Aligators died,we went to Disneyland 2
>We have to kids now
>Parents returned after the Avengers stopped that grape man
Will have to introduce my racist parents to my African wife and Kids
...Thanks Avengers
At least Prime Minster M'Baka helped out. T'Challa, if he had been around for the dusting, wouldn't have and you know it.
That guy is legitimately insane and I love him for it. Now that we actually get news from Wakanda it's become a part of my morning ritual to read what crazy shit he posts on twitter. Anything #Yibambe is gold from that goon, I hope he stays leader now that daddy-issue catman is back.
>"hey @PETA since were both veggietarns you realize breathing the air after the dusting makes us canivores yes?"
Some saw that in poor taste, but I'm hoping King Katman steps down. I love this guy
>Justin Trudeau voices disapproval of M'baku's tweet
>M'baku calls him a cowardly twig and challenges him to a duel with spears
>Trudeau fucking apologizes
This fucking guy, may his reign last a thousand years.
When the snap first happened there was so much panic, I was able to rob a bank and get away with it. I walked away with $700K. Sadly my wife came back from the snap and is now angry at me for it.
>Talking to neighbor about bitch wife
>Neighbor starts turning into dust
>wait a few seconds and I don't
>Go see if bitch wife is dust
>She's not
I hate my life
>Japan started re-militarizing after the dusting
>they were about to go to war with Russia over resources
>no other nation wanted to do anything real about it and played it with kiddy gloves
>M'baku threatened to just fucking vibranium bomb them out of existence if they went to war over Twitter
>"ill make the dusts look like a childrens tussle"
fucking based
Just put her in the backyard, nobody's gonna know. Even pre-snap, you know how many people go missing every year? She could just be another one of the lost, user.
I'd pay good money to watch M'baku single-handedly beat up every UN representative in a marathon MMA bout.
Did you hear about that Vulture guy a few years ago? He was allegedly outfitting rando criminals with leftover alien shit from the invasion years ago.
Now that the great big fucking ship Thanos rode in on crashed...do you reckon we're gonna see like thousands of cases of more people getting robbed by alien weapons from beyond time and space?
I'm worried about our safety now that based M'baku is out of business...
A few years back, pre-snap, some nutcase bandits robbed the bank I use with a big-ass space gun leftover from the Battle of New York. It wouldn't surprise me if that kind of shit happens again in the wake of the Grimace's spaceship coming down.
>he doesnt know that when people get dusted all of their body fluids stays around
Heard America was passing a bill to bring back SHIELD
I liked M'bakus take from back in 2021
>"avengers lost caus they tried to act like the SHIELDs; why use a shield when havig a big spear sloves everthing, including getting women?"
Thank God for the Avengers for unsnapped because most of the writers in both Marvel & DC are dusted except for Bendis. Fucking BENDIS taking control both comics!
>"i miss T'Challa everday but the bright side is @taylerswift13 is gone"
Really gonna miss Prime Minster M'Baku now that the king is back
based M'baku
I still remember a few years ago when he was on tv in some political debate and he just straight up starts barking like an ape to shut someone up. Was the most alpha thing I've seen on live television.
Anyone have any good ideas on how to assassinate T'challa? I don't want to lose M'bakuposting, no matter the cost.
The surreal part is it fucking worked, the guy backed down and let M'baku speak his peace, looking down in silence like a chastised child.
hey guys just came back after 5 years, is the sixth Game of Thrones novel out yet? or was George R.R. Martin one of the people who got vanished?
>getting news out of Wakanda
>still getting basically blackout from NK
I wonder how they dealt with the dusting? The missile tests seemed to stop right around that time.
>George R. R. Martin's survived from getting dusted
>His book still doesn't finish
>GoT
Please turn back into dust
>Got dusted
>Whole family died because I was the one driving
>Get undusted to a world where my family has been dead for five years
What the fuck I'm suppossed to do now?
See, I was anti the whole "Registration Act", but after 4 alien invasions, constant super alien shit going on, I think I might reconsider Tony's "Build Armor Around the World" idea.
We could call it like...the X-Com Project.
Simple, you must kill the Avengers.
You could seek vengeance through your driving like some kind of ghost racer.
A ghost rider of sorts
I bought half of downtown Manhattan after real estate prices crashed and now everybody has to pay up.
Don't fall for the giant food meme, it's LITERALLY empty calories, there's no more nutrients in one of them fifty foot tomatoes than in a regular-sized one.
Hey guys I just came back to life. What'd I miss? Any good Yea Forums material while I was gone?
Yeah we finally got that 2 hour long Korra porn flash.
The Registration Act is retarded from the get-go, because as you've mentioned, the biggest threats to Earth have always been ayy lmaos that aren't going to register either way.
Pym's giant food gave me giant cancer.
No
Not Yea Forums but since a lot of animators and actors got dusted other art forms like puppet shows made a massive comeback.
Can't believe Alan Moore got the Watchmen rights again.
Watchamen 2:Escape to Africa blew my mind
>Nintendo released a handheld/console hybrid in 2017
>Without Miyamoto, Paper Mario got the comeback it deserved
>Super Smash Bros Ultimate released and had shit like King K. Rool in it
>Insexual Awakening is a thing now
Feels good man, so much vidya to get caught up on. Glad I'm a dustie.
Most nations have already passed laws stating that anyone who was dusted is legally considered 5 years younger. Since they all had to renew their driving licenses/passports/whatever anyway, all new forms of ID for them come with a little diclaimer stating their actual age.
>Shitting on Hulk.
Nigga the guy is a star for a reason. Specially now that he is now chill. The fucker went through a lot and you people still disrespect him.
>got dusted
>come back to life
>check my twitch to find some rock golem guy as the no. 1 streamer playing Fortnite.
The fuck just happened?
1- You're likely not legally married to ya wife now. She legally died ... til death do us part. So if you wanna live with wife 1 do it but you don't have to.
2- Who the FUCK is gonna buy a house from you? 50% of all life was dusted ... there would be tons of empty homes for people to snatch up because everyone who lived there or owned it was gone now. So how much could you hope to sale a house for?
3- Apparently half of ALL life was dusted, including plant life and farm animals. Boom, you got that 50% of corn and cows and shit that went bye bye back.
There's complex problems with the results of the dusting but that's a bad example OP.
>in the process of joining the mile high club when I got dusted
>get returned to an airport lounge with my pants around my ankles and immediately blow my load in public in front of dozens of strangers
Thanks Tony, I guess.
>Thinking Bruce wouldn't wish for all those lives lost as the result of the snap to safely come back.
If it was Thor who snapped them back I could see him having an oversight like that, but not Prof Hulk..
>not liking 2 wives
youtu.be
Korg is a real bro and his whole "revolution" schtick is hilarious, plus Thor saying "suscribe to Korg" and personally threatening every single troll gave him a big boost.
Imagine being one of those fags flying a plane that got dusted, so when you get undusted you fall from the fucking sky to your death lmao.
Guys you won't fucking believe this shit:
>My mom just an hero herself because she couldn't stand being lonely anymore
>We got undusted the second she already slit her wrists
>"Well, FUCK" were her last words
But that wasn't the most fucked up thing yesterday
>My neighbor was paying respects to his lost son
>Stood in the EXACT place where he got dusted
>I saw him bloat and bleed from his mouth
>His 5 year old son poofed back inside his own dad
>Both the kid and dad died painfully
I was so fucking traumatized by this that I totally forgot my mom killed herself
>Neighbor's son died during the snap
>Fortunately, they collected the ashes and put them in a container, then buried it
>tfw I know their son's probably fucking dead right now both from being buried alive and also due to being crushed as soon as he came back to life
Would it count as murder or manslaughter to be trapped to this fate? Or would it just be an accident?
Why is everyone tweeting "F"?
The most unrealistic part of Avengers Endgame is that somehow the PlayStation Network servers are still working 5 years after half the universe died.
>living in a world where Muppets bounced back
Feels great. Also since someone mentioned it holy fucking shit that 'Vanished' episode Sesame Street did was sad as fuck.
>Bert looks to where Ernie was sitting during their lunch
>he's gone
>whole episode is him trying to find out what happened and where everyone went
What the hell happened to the people who moved on, remarried, and now are accidentally bigamists?
Why? There'd be some chaos at first, but since half the programmers would still be around and they'd quickly hire new people, it would get solved in no time.
they gotta pick a side and something like 0.1% of people will try to share to varying degrees of success
>Wife and I both got dusted
>Come back to discover that our newborn starved to death in her crib
We're on the verge of getting divorced due to the guilt. Everyone keeps saying that it wasn't our fault but I feel like many people would rather we just be happy to be alive.
>Miyazaki survived
>No Bloodborne 2
What the fuck, I just got back from the dead and my wife went with another guy because our entire family got "dusted" or something. Fuck you avengers, you should have let me rest, I will kill you all. Oh wait, most are already dead anyway
>mfw some yuropoor talks shit about America
>just have to mention that America’s greatest heroes literally saved the universe
>works every time
Kek you semen slurpers need to step up. America may not win any World Cups but goddamn it we’re saving the world day in and out while you guys are getting cucked by the EU
>cuck post
>coming back killed someone post
>coming back embarrassed me (jerking/shitting/etc.) post
>muh economic crisis post
>muh food shortage even though half the living food was snapped back post
>pym acting out of character because of a non-existent food shortage post
>correcting someone with a disinformative take on the movie's events post
>ironic mcu /pol/ post post
>serious mcu /pol/ post post
the only good thing in the entire thread, and just barely, is some of the M'Baku stuff