The Homestuck epilogues: meat or candy?

>the whole obama section

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Jade doesn't have a tail though.
Did hussie's ghost writers not read the comic?

>JOHN: well, what the fuck do i know. the only illicit substance i’ve ever done is lick that STUPID trickster lollipop.

Wait. When did John lick the lollipop?

jane is a nazi now

Credits when rose and kanaya got married

Also Jane is now /ourgal/

>40 chapters for each choice
jesus fucking christ

>Dirk kills himself
Lol

Wait, hold the fuck up.
What the fuck is this shit?
Is Hussie responsible for this?

After quickly skimming this, I can safely assert with total confidence, that this is the worst fucking thing I've ever read.

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She apparently has a dogdick now too

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Why is Gamzee in the fridge if he's shown free at the end of the credits of the comic?

>Act 7 was a legit better ending than this
I am floored.

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Candied meat.

yes she does

Someone sum it up for me

>Karkat leaves Dave and becomes the leader of a resistance against Jane
Hahaha

Based Jane

What in Lord English's name were they thinking?

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I can't believe Jane is LITERALLY Drumpf

>John knocked up Roxy
Hahaha

>Homestuck ending is some rambling thing about Jade being DRUMPH

Could not have happened to a worse person. Fuck you Andrew Hussie. King of the JUST

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As of page 2, I highly recommend the candy route. I highly motherfuckin recommend it.

Nothing matters, everything is awful, I hope you like Dirk.

>Meenkat is canon
Good fucking shit.

FUCK YOU I'M GONNA READ BOTH AT THE SAME TIMES BACKWARDS

I still don't understand what Homestuck is or why people are so obsessed with it

>Obama was an Sburb player
hahaha

>People who are reading meat are hating it and the ones reading candy are loving it

I'm starting to think that's the point

These 8 years are going to be looked back on the most embarrassing moment for political commentary in history

What is Obama's god tier

Literally canon

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the nigger of poop

Prince of Economy

Alright who can explain classes to me?

>JOHN: well it probably helps that jade literally said the words to me... and i may be paraphrasing here, but...
>JOHN: “hey john, i’m gonna fuck dave and karkat!”

Haha, classic jade.

i am going to kill andrew hussie

nice

>DUmping 80 CHAPTERS all at once
Fuck yourself endlessly, Hussie.

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Karkat leaves them because he's sick of being a third wheel, and goes on to be the leader of trollkind.

Give me a rundown, is best boy mentioned once during this, or should I not even bother reading this?

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where are the chapters that involve feet

>meat still in second person
>candy in third person
Hmm

Lol no

the only trolls involved are 30% kanaya, 40% vriska, 25% meenah and 5% gamzee

>JADE: i know he wasnt real!

>JADE: wait...

>JADE: are you saying

>JADE: obama was real?

>DAVE: ...

>DAVE: yes

>DAVE: obama was real

>DAVE: he was the president

>KARKAT: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

>JADE: all this time i thought obama was like

>JADE: an aspirational fictional character that you modeled your life after

There's some gems here.

I'm honestly glad.

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>Eridan and Feferi are only in 1 page

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>a rundown
>Dirk kills himself
>jade is the cutest homewrecker and has a tail now for some reason? She and Dave marry.
>JohnRoxy canon, he knocks her up, confirming that the beta kids are fertile.
>Jane fucks everyone and becomes a nazi that goes after trolls
>Karkat, sick of being a cuck, goes off to form a rebellion, meenah helps him out and they fuck.
>Dave meets super Obama in a forest, who gives him some advice and turns him into ultimate Dave.

thats 1 page too many

*wwalks into thread*

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>GAMZEE: HeR PoPcOrN SkIlLeT’S PiPiNg hOt fOr yOu aLrEaDy. YoU JuSt nEeD A TiGhT AnD LoYaL BoY LiKe mE To sTaRt sHoVeLiNg iN ThE CoRn. :o)

Holy shit

jade is a SLUT!

sounds like a big fuck you to all the fans

Fuck you

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>reading homestuck in 2019
>not reading the superior PREQUEL

baka desu famalams, its like ur not even trying

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Jade fucks what she WANTS

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I don't get it.

why doesn't John just stop the scratch,zap out bec noir and help the past kids win the beta session?
No act 6, the perfect ending

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lol so the end had three hetro ships?

Did even one lgbt relationship survive?

Well for all it's faults I must aknowledge that Prequel quality was pretty consistent.

Homestuck in the other hand is "I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS WORSE THAN THE PREVIOUS CHARACTER"

Rosemary did.

It strikes me from all the spoilers that NEITHER of these are the true ending. Meaning John still has to do the windy thing.

at least homestuck ended

It's weird reading both at the same time, on one hand you get vriska getting the shit beat out of her, the other dirk kills himself.

absolutely based andrew

Somebody give me the quick rundown on what happens to Vriska.

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Another Dirk survives though.

This is Jade.
She wrecks gay relationships and is a slut.

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Baby vriska

Rosemary adopts a baby version of her named Vriska.

time to ingore the epilogues as non-canon.

>WV is dead
It hurts...

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I'm hiding this thread because what little I've read of the "epilogue" is not improving my day. Also Homestuck is shit.

She's best girl.

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So what happens to Terezi?

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nope, got confirmed as a failed marriage too.

Where? Last I read they were raising a grubbaby

gets fucked by john, probably knocked up too. god, at least john left two baby-mommas behind.

>not ignoring everything post Act 5 as non-canon

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>80 chapters of pure undiluted garbage
Seriously what the fuck
I'm absolutely floored that Homestuck just keeps getting worse

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candy or meat?

Candy
Meat is Dirk's fanfic

>JOHN: now i have to pretend to laugh and think it’s funny when she makes jokes about being the next to “tie the knot.”
>TEREZI: WOW D1D SH3 R34LLY GO FOR TH4T DOUBL3 3NT3NDR3

And we have a knot joke

true, true, i just hoped john would man up and end the gay singularity.

well i guess that's it huh. the book already ended with a fart, but someone sprinted back into the room, dropped trou and unleashed a huge stream of wet shit onto the pages as the cherry on top.

WHAT HAPPENS TO LORD FUCKING ENGLISH

>Only in Dirk's fanfic is davekat canon
Loooool

who ARADIA here

and candy is caliopee's fanfic. your point being?

>Jade got a tail
>Gamzee was still in the fridge

Those ghost writers didn't even read the comic lmao!

>Most likely bullshit but mfw if its true John smashed the two best girls

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john travelled back in canon to get gamzee

Calliope is a better writer

He sorta did

Man
now I don't care anymore
I skimmed this to get the gist and now I'm finally free.

>literally 2nd chapter
>Jane is recognized fascist and a xenophobe
>Those ghost writers didn't even read the comic
you don't say

So let me get this straight. Candy is a parody of slice-of-life fanfiction, and meat is a parody of super grimdark fanfiction.

Same desu

We spent all this time to get back to square one of "that doesn't fucking make sense". He fell in the black hole and that was it. The entity backed up by an omnipotent, multi-dimensional manipulator, the entity capable of literally capable of ripping apart reality itself, the entity who's greatest danger is the fact that there are countless instances of him running around, and he's always able to make more, fell into a black hole and that's it. That's the conclusion.

where is the footjob scene?

based katiaposter

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Candy route, jade gives one to dave in front of everyone while Jane, dressed in an SS officer costume, spanks him.

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It's freeing. Tumblr is going to hate it, I got a little bit of what I wanted. Now I can just fap to porn of Rose getting fucked without any nagging feelings.

I'm finally free.

*insert End of Evangelio shinji rant here*

At least I can now write fanfiction, knowing that discarding the epilogue is for the best.

ROXY: john...

ROXY: do u ever think about like

ROXY: gender???

cool.

Yeah but if some fat fangirl ever tries to harass you you can bring it up and watch them foam at the mouth.

OR! OR WE COULD READ AND WATCH GRIMDORKS/KAN HEIR PORN! MAKE MINDWIPE'S "JOHN FUCKS ROSE AND KANAYA" THE TRUE CANON!

Goddamn, how I hate the comic.

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>reading meat
Read Candy, it's better. For whatever that's worth.

Wait. If Gamzee is still alive and not sawed in half.

What happened to Lord English?

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that's the second page of candy

Wwe did it, hsg! Finally, wwe did it.

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>Jane and jake had a kid

I still don't know what was up with all the jokes about them being infertile.

yeah but then Roxy marries John and let herself get knocked up over and over again.

everything after cascade is not canon

But John dies while Terezi is kneeling next to him. From the poisened tooth of LE that was wedged into his ribcage.

It was a meme resulting from this picture.

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*screams*

Don't forget the other good parts
>DirkJake sunk forever
>Davepeta does nothing

Do I need to have read the information from the ARG?

Roxy identifies as "they"

Oh man, people gonna be mad.

Yeah but she's also biologically female.

why

pull the other, it got bells on it.

Also, dirk taking over the narrative is weird.

The caliborn bits are canon

Dirk made Davekat canon, Calliope sunk it and made Meenkat canon instead.
Weigh that how you will.

They had hate-sex before he died.

DAVE: mr president

DAVE: can you keep a secret

OBAMA: Yes I can, Dave.

OBAMA: These days, keeping secrets is practically all I ever do down here.

DAVE: i think

He runs a hand through his hair, and looks back down.

DAVE: i think im gay

cool.

So is the whole epilogues' purpose is to piss everyone off and admit that the story really is nothing but a big clusterfuck?

Because honestly, I'm at peace on that now.

Obama basically says he isn't, and that he's bisexual.

He got laid. That's something.

THE. OBUMMER! IS! A! TRAITOR!

>start with candy
>Jane is Trump methaphor
wow

>DAVE: im gay
>OBAMA: No you're not.
Thanks Obama.

Thankfully Equius was untouched by whatever ungodly flaming mess these fucking idiots splurted out. John hears robotic horses when he's stuck inside the juju in the meat epilogue, but that's about it.

what a fucking waste of time

that's meat

Based Obongo

KANAYA: Rosemary
DAVE: like rose plus your last name which is maryan or something right
KANAYA: Maryam
DAVE: yeah that
DAVE: ergo, rosemary
KANAYA: I Hate It
Heh

He's just making sure his aunt Jade can get all the dick.

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its in both

Wait, do they bring up the plot point of having to get sucked into the juju when trying to confront Caliborn or does that get retconned too?

I am on chapter 12 of meat and this is some boring fucking shit.

>Jane, Jake and Gamzee
Holy shit I dont know WHAT the fuck is going on

I only started reading the prologue of the epilogue (fuck you Hussie for making me say that) and I can't stop rolling my eyes.

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And now dave and dirk are in control of the narrative, makes sense since hussie loves writing for those two. Might as well make them the narrators.

>dave
That's calliope

This is really quite shocking to me.

I actually laughed at something HS related. Something I've never done in a long, long time.

Dirk actually killed himself. The fandom processing this is going to be amazing.

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i'm on chapter 12 and i'm enjoying the character dynamics, it's what i read homestuck for in the first place

yes

So many things are going to piss absolutely everyone off. He wrote an epilogue that will satisfy nobody except people who just want to see things burn.

That part made me fucking laugh too. The imagery of Dirk decapitating himself again in such serious prose was a lot to handle. The lampshading in the funeral scene was icing on the whole thing.

ARADIA: oh no did we miss the entire corpse party
ARADIA: i hope not
SOLLUX: yes that w0uld be *such* a tragedy.

And these nerds outta nowhere

>i'm on chapter 12 and i'm enjoying the character dynamics, it's what i read homestuck for in the first place
Too bad it's not happening with any fun or interesting versions of the characters.
I realize that I am reading a lot of shit about characters and setting I can't bring myself to really care about anymore.

>looking around for reactions
>everyone is trying to read it slowly, still reacting to the initial shit not realizing just how bad it gets
This is gonna be good.

what the fuck am i even reading

this is some kind of literary suicide
and not a shitty accidental one like late act 6
this is a well-rehearsed act of authorial self-immolation

Homestuck ended back in 2016 this is just a shambling corpse of what it once was

That's exactly what it is. I only hope it's for a good reason.

Ohhh my god. This is golden.
I fucking hated Dirk, but I can't believe Hussie had the balls to kill him off.

Jane is makes some good points. Troll eugenics are the thinking man's choice.

i imagine it was too much of a burden to bear. it could've been great (homestuck, it had a lot of potential) but it ultimately became something too big to chew

GAMZEE: tHe MoThErFuCkEr’S rIgHt.
GAMZEE: It AlL bE fUcKiN cRiTiCaL tO bOtH yOuR rEdEmPtIoN, tO kIsS aNd MaKe Up :o)
FEFERI: Sig)(. If it’s for redemption, t)(en...
FEFERI: Very well.
ERIDAN: oh fuck yeah
ERIDAN: RUB A DUB DUB COME GIMME A GLUB!!!

HYUK HYUK

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>Jake watching with a baby as Gamzee rapes Jane
I'm actually about to fucking disintegrate. This is high art. Hussie has always excelled in his disdain for his fans. I am so fucking excited to see what the reaction to this as a whole will be.

Too bad we didn't learn if Terezi got impregnated by John as well. Wouldn't that have been nice?

Damn, I wish "Tales from the Planet of Junk", especially the "John fucks the multiverse"-chapters were made canon instead.

Glad that epilogue ends with just text. Why make a comic to end a comic when you can just write 80 pages?

Lazy.

this is seriously fucking wild
homestuck was already a shambling corpse in 2016

keep reading, roxygen gets redeemed.

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Bold of you to assume Hussie wrote all of this himself

I'm fine with this

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I don't know, this stuff seems like par the course
Plus it canonizes the Skaianet text

what the fuck?
which chapter

She got fucking cut in half in the meat epilogue.

Oh, so something good DID come from these epilogues.

>John thinks gamzee is "bad touching" tavros

Hahahaha

Has Rosemary at least got torn to shreds? That's the main thing I care about at this moment.

porn of eggmop when

Cascade was the last good thing in Homestuck besides Caliborn. And Caliborn isn't worth slogging through the rest.

Yeah. Tumblr's still going "awww lookit at the davekat :D" in the first chapters. They don't realize how bad it gets.

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JOHN: i mean, even today, jane was up here hollering at jake about how his dick doesn’t work right when she KNEW we were all waiting for them downstairs!
JADE: i know...
JADE: but all youre going to do by kidnapping him is piss everyone off
TAVROS: Excuse me dearest aunt but,,, is it kidnapping if i badly would like to go?

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Do you think Andrew regrets making homestuck?

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Candy 18. Jake is a cuck. And Jade has a futa dog dick literally in the same chapter. This is scorched earth writing. It's honestly pretty great. I'm not sure how satisfying this will all be when I've finished it all, but this is deeply wacky in the most unsettling way.

so are we all gonna get together for a mass suicide after this or what

>picked meat
>get Vriska dying
>get Davekat
>but got John/Terezi and Meenah stealing the life ring

I don't know how to feel about this...

I just wanted my retarded crackship that isn't Johnrezi to be real

absolutely

Does ANYONE unironically like this?

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Forgot my image...

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Is just me or this is EXTREMELY boring? I'm not having a good time reading this shit at all, this feels like shitty fanfiction and no I don't mean something mocking shitty fanfictions that is actually funny, I mean that it feels like those awfully boring fanservice fanfictions where nothing interesting happens at all.

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I think he regrets letting other people make Homestuck.

Because that's what it is

I think he regrets letting Homestuck get to the state it is

Can I like it from a "it's so bad the shitstorm surrounding it will be incredible" sort of way?

I think he regrets the death of his father the most.

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That's about how I feel

How the fuck was Hiveswap ever meant to work with this clusterfuck?

If youve ever watched Samurai Flamenco, you should be VERY familiar with the feeling the epilogue gives off.

The feeling of the author not caring anymore?

Nope it's the sacred cow

>John's kid and new vriska are fucking

It's like the stupidest shit.

OH FUCK THEY MADE JAKE AN ACTUAL KEK! THIS IS FUCKING RICH!

I don't think I laughed this hard about Homestuck ever.

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You guys keep talking about how bad the fandom is gonna flip its tits, but I don't see anything worth caring about yet

>What drove Roxy away was him being depressed and just an all-around huge wet blanket who was impossible to live with.

john/roxy: divorced

Potentially, yes. It's a face to the bottom of a mountain of explosive diarrhea, where the first prize is getting to set the charges.

me

user you don't understand.
Even the mention in the epilogue of JadeDavekat freaked them the fuck out.
This isn't actually all that bad, but they will go fucking nuts because the Homestuck fandom is bad.

Ohhh this is gonna be a entertainingly horrible and / or horribly fun read

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Well, considering it's been so long there is nothing worth getting upset about anymore.

John needs a shot of testorone. A mentor like Big Boss would help.

AND JADE IS INFERTILE! Oh this just gets better and better by the minute.

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going by what i've read so far? abso-fucking-lutely

i'm currently about halfway through meat. from what i've heard about the candy route, it doesn't sound any different. andrew hussie is burning it all down.
i like it so ironically it wraps back around to being unironic

Do Terezi and Karkat interact at any point in this? Like, if this whole thing seems to exist to just burn everything down, why not add salt on that character dynamic after killing it in the main story.

I haven't cared about Homestuck since 2014.
Gimme a rundown of the epilogues and let me know who fucks whom. I've got money on Peppermint Patty fucking the retarded girl.

>she keeps trying to knock up Rose
Pfff

>it's all real
I genuinely don't know what to think

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user, they have the Meat epilogue.

Davekat is real there and I witnessed it. Like Vriska I got too close to the truth and now I am depressed. I wish there was a third epilogue.

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The fact Jane and Gamzee are thing seems completelly out of character, I don't even give a fuck about Jake being a cuckold

>infertile
No user, you're reading it wrong. She has a dogdick. She was bothering Rose to try and get her pregnant.

Screw Karkat, that little bitch should just accept his fate of becoming a victim of the Trolocaust and die in a gaschamber like the degenerate mutie he is.

>Jade's got a dog dick

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Yeah and it's being forced by Dirk who is the bad guy. They'll freak out.

What? But she's trying with Dave?

>dogdickjade is canon

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he's just getting ready for the ass-kicking i will perpetuate someday after i chase him through voids for uncountable timespans, after we both Die

his remorse is just putting his affairs in order

lulzie, found the mad fujo-shit

Read it again. She's not saying she's trying. She says she hasn't tried, because she has a penis.

Is pretty clear at this point none of this shit is canon.

Is just Hussie playing LE EPIC TROLL TROLLING EVERYONE HUE HUE LE EPICAL.

She can't try with Jade because of what's heavily implied to be that she doesn't have a pussy for him to fuck (instead being a dog dick). She's a futa

hence why she wants to to fuck Rose (Dave's sort of sister?) as a follow up option to them having a kid

>Dave thinks he's gay because he keeps getting fucked by Jade's dogdick and loves it

>But Rose doesn’t get to finish what she was trying to say. Lord English’s mouth roars open and a wave of energy blasts through your group. Rose is the only one caught in it. She dissolves in slow motion. You can see the outline of her body in shadow. One arm thrown up over her eyes, shoulders pulled up defensively, cape billowing out behind her. She leaves an afterimage of shimmering light in her wake and then dissipates, drifting apart like a handful of salt tossed out to sea. You can almost hear the cosmic clock counting down, tick tock, and a chime to accompany her fate: Heroic.
Good

>Is pretty clear at this point none of this shit is canon.
You didn't figure that out from the first mention of Jade's tail? The one that Lexxy wasn't allowed to add?

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VRISKA: Noooooooo!
JOHN: welcome to earth c, ha ha.
JOHN: it fucking sucks!

or better

VRISKA: Noooooooo!
JOHN: welcome to homestuck, ha ha.
JOHN: it fucking sucks!

Ah, I got it just now.

Aaaaaaaand another reason why I will ignore the epilogues as non-canon.

>EVERYONE FUCKING LOSES
the madman

it's styled as a fanfic and half of all fanworks ignore it, because by god she SHOULD.

Just incorporate whatever best fits your fetishes from them, that's what I'm doing.

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The retarded shit is on the candy one, the meat one is kino

What the fuck am I reading

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How do any of you have the drive to go through this slag?

VRISKA: WH8T????????
JOHN: and since you didn’t come to earth c with us, that means technically she was here first.
JOHN: so that would make you...
JOHN: (vriska)?
(VRISKA): That’s fucking un8ccepta8le!

And thus vriska, has become (vriska)

Wow kudos to Karkat. He should've done this in act 5 but ok. I guess gamkat is dead for good with a kick in the ribs while it was down on the ground. Good riddance.

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>meat
>kino
>davekat
No

The cycle is complete

no, it's good. if homestuck descended into an orgy it would be a marked improvement on its later day quality, and a statement on the franchise

i have an eternal duty burned into my Soul to follow hussie's crap. and then probably that of others once i get bored of him in the span of infinity

thankfully jesus will probably give me an easy out, a trip to the timelessness of heaven will slough off the burden. then i can move on to other things. but until then, my somber vigil is Law for me

Liquid Autism flooding this thread.

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TEREZI: 1 JUST 4SSUM3D TH4T BY NOW YOU TWO M1GHT H4V3 GOTT3N TOG3TH3R
JOHN: really?
JOHN: why?
TEREZI: NO R34SON. JUST 4 HUNCH
TEREZI: 1 DONT TH1NK 1T WOULD H4V3 WORK3D OUT THOUGH
JOHN: what makes you say that?

shitting on john/roxy in both timelines.

I hope you know that the Candy rote is non-canon right? lol

That's Candy, I'll do the Meat:

>John heads off, does a bunch of largely pointless retcon stuff to get a crew together for Masterpiece which happens as we saw. He also gets another Ring of Life
>Vriska gets black holed neigh immediately before the Betas even get out
>English kills pretty much everyone, bites John and gets his fake tooth stuck in his chest before Davepeta kamikazes into the black hole
>Meenah survives and steals the Ring of Life from John before fucking off
>John runs into Terezi, they piss about in the wastes of the the Dream Bubbles for real reason, then they fuck in the back of Dad's car
>They warped back to Earth C, where John dies from the bite wound. Terezi puts his corpse in the wallet

Meanwhile on Earth C:
>Jane runs a campaign against Karkat for presidency, she's kind of racist against Troll fucking
>Roxy has an ambiguous relationship with Calliope, decides to identify as a dude
>Dave and Karkat get together eventually
>Dirk takes control of the narration, and starts controlling people's minds, fucking up Rose to the point where she basically becomes his puppet, but also her ultimate self
>Until Alt!Calliope uses Jade as a conduit to exert herself as the narrator, planning to not actually influence events
>Dirk eventually wrestles back long enough to take Rose, Terezi, and John's corpse into space for reasons unknown
>Kanaya, Roxy, and Jade are rather upset by this, with Karkat agreeing that it's pretty fucked up
>An Epilogue that doesn't really make a whole lot of sense, but appears to be Aradia, a robot Dave, and the Jade that went into the Juju, escaping from the black hole

Yeah, like Jade and John had their first time with each other, and Jade desperately craves more of his mangrit.

Do we get a scene where she has to watch John impregnate (Vriska)?

I was never going to read a novel's worth of Homestuck prose in 2019, but I'm looking at the screencaps and comments on it in this thread and jesus motherfucking christ. I barely remember why I liked it in the first place but I sincerely pity everyone who still gives a fuck about these characters

user, neither of them are canon.

god i just don't even know what the fuck this is

>if homestuck descended into an orgy

It is an orgy right now, all characters are fucking everyone as if they were some kind of "love if free" 60s hippies community

JOHN: um.
TEREZI: FOR FUCKS S4K3 JOHN, DONT S4Y 4NYTH1NG STUP1D R1GHT NOW

he nods stupidly, and leans forward to kiss her. terezi attacks, closing the gap between them swiftly. she bites into his mouth, drawing blood when she sucks his lower lip. he twists his hands in the fabric of her shirt so hard it rides up her back.

john/terezi finally

I don't care anymore, just here for the porn.

Yeah, hahaha, I feel like I should cry, but instead it's more like that greentext about bioware where the love gone and the memory with it.

So Dirk died in a timeline and went full villain in the other?

hussie is going to have to go live in the woods lik the fucking unabomber after this because there will be homestuck fans out for blood

>Roxy goes into labor at a fucking funeral where they're having a climactic conversation about the kids breaking apart

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Yeah. Though it done through the weird lense of "It's alright to manipulate and control people if it's for their own good" that happened with Dirk a lot.

Are we really supposed to believe Jane is wrong about trolls breeding out of control?

Homestuck: The Return

No.

something about the Human Replacement

This is some /HSG/ tier writing, which one of you guys behind this.

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Wait, so the two lines are connected?

Great.

>we waited years for this

Is Krogan dillema all over again

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can someone redpill me on the meat/candy shit
what's the premise of having two versions, do they have anything to do with each other?

No, but Terezi makes a point later that says she actually IS turning out to be the Condesce's Heiress after all.

They do.
Candy is earth c fluff, Meat is grimdark
They're both shitty fanfics.

What's the estimated word count for the combined text of the epilogues?

Especially since in candy, Dave talks about coin flipping creating alternate realities.
If there isn't a true route after this, I'm gonna be pissed.

exactly
andrew hussie is going scorched earth on this. there will not a single person anywhere who doesn't despise every aspect of this. and he's doing it on purpose this time.

this is absolutely fucking awful in every possible way but i'm kind of loving how terrible it is

They are also 8oth connected with Meenah stealing the life ring and moving to the Candy epilogue.

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They do at least take a moment to point out that's it's shit, that one story is all meat and blood, and the other is all candy and fluff. Then they ascribe some nonsense about about that being some canon break down of the universe, and that John's choice essentially kicked it into overdrive.

But they still fucking did it.

>Vriska has an introspective moment, realizes how much she much Terezi means to her and tries to get in touch

One bright shining star in a sea of mediocrity.

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Yeah, good for him.

This is just kind of cynical and sad at this point. You could have left it at Act 7, Hussie. A pretty lightshow and triumphant music and a "Thanks for reading". I know he didn't even write most of this but just move on dude. Start something else. You're getting older. Is this going to be your last big work? It's basically white noise at this point. Dirk rapes Maplehoof and Equius gets an abortion. Eridan starts lynching carapacians but only the black ones. There I wrote the next two chapters for them. I get that's the point, telling the fans that any of this is basically wild fanfic by now. But it's so long it goes from funny and ridiculous to just sad.

Where's Whistles, Andrew Cuckie?

I unironically dig how terrible it is. Call it shilling if you like, but it's gonna be all fire and glory for the next couple days.

This is just setting up the standard "Secret True Ending after completing both paths" stuff isn't it?

Hussie should have moved on to another, better, major work approximately 5 years ago. Instead it's just been an endless ride of pure shit and vaporware vidya bringing us to whatever the heck he just wasted his time writing.

So John shouldn't have choosen at all.

>John dies after fucking best girl

Now that's a way to go out

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So it’s basically another continuation of the whole “narrative is the real villain” thing Hussies been on since late Act 6 or something?

Andrew Hussy

Ninjas and hos, I found the feet.

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If you picked the meat option, Terezi drops Vriska for John.

Those PBS fuckers should have never made that video.

>vaporware vidya
What? You didn't like based Cirava in the based Friendsim?

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It would be nice. There's a distinct lack of Vriska to the point of being suspicious. Like, they went out of their way to minimize her role, which seems like a really obvious set-up for a the joke being that the "Vriska Route" is the good end. Add to that the conspicuous absence of Doc Scatch having any influence over events after the Friendsim Epilogue.

So that leaves two options. The fanciful dream that maybe there's a secret third route, and the much more likely option of "BUY HIVESWAP PART 2, PLEASE, WE ARE SO FUCKING BROKE".

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Well, the epilogue is disappointing. I'm still waiting for hiveswap act 2. Fucking Hussie, give me some fucking news

How is Dave suddenly in control of Meat.

I have no idea what is going anymore

It's Alt!Calliope.

Is classpectanon here? He said he would help me last time.

I should've dropped off the bandwagon once Problem Sleuth ended. Touche, Hussie, a decade of my life gone to waste on a terrible web-comic with a few glorious moments sprinkled in.

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I thought the red text is Calliope

There's a part in Candy during the Vriska/(Vriska) chat where she straight up says that John's fucked up depressive state + retcon powers is warping canon on a subconcious level.

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Fuck this garbage

I'm gonna read If On A Winter's Night A Traveler instead.

Don't worry, I will help you.

>???? of 8lood is shit
>Page of ???? is shit
>Page of 8lood is the fucking worst

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Fuck no, I want an ending where John just picks up any woman of Homestuck (except Caliope), impregnates them, then grabs the rule 63 versions of the male characters, impregnates them too, and then becomes the Patriach of a big happy family.

Fuck him.

Can I get a tl;dr? This shit is such a slog to read especially without pictures

So, True Route next week I guess.

it's all a slog, that's literally a hundred percent of the point
read it only if you want to feel dead inside

Both epilogues are wrong.

see

See
tldr John died but he did manage to fuck the best girls

I hate myself for wanting to believe.

Nope, supposedly this was it.

How does lord english die?

Hahaha oh wow, I couldn't read it to the end, is just that fucking boring.

It fucking better be.

Why am I even bothering to read this garbage? If Hussie can't deliver on what really matters.

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This could / probably is just my own projection here, but there is also the possibility that, as John rests at the center of this, and he ends up with different girls in both endings, that it's doing a VN thing. Each route is a girl, with John's own indecision pulling him in different directions, literally fracturing reality into paths defined by who he ends up boning.

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10 chapters into meat. The Dirk/Rose conversation I've been waiting for for years was good. They're becoming omniscient? Dirk is sounding more like Doc Scratch than ever.

And oh god, I wonder how much time passes for the kids in the juju from their perspective? John "wishes he had a book". Sucks that they don't even get to be together in there.

>The fucking dad part

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Threadly reminder that Spades Slick did nothing wrong and I am so fucking mad.

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>read it
Just read a summary and watch the reactions

He doesn't die
he teleports into canwc

It's a happy ending

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one route for each wome in homestuck, that would be cool.

*sigh*

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ahem

F8CK KATNEP

>Tumblr speak
Course

FUCK YOU!

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And tumblr is already furious that it's too heterosexual

I'm pretty much in agreement, but that's exactly why I hope for a "True Route". Both routes are basically the misery Olympics for John, with Candy having a blatant-ass convo between John and Vriska about how everything feels like a contrived artificial nightmare.

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What the fuck happened to Jack

>too heterosexual
>ignore the meat epilogue

lmao

>JOHN: tavros, listen to me.

>JOHN: are you... getting... bad touched by your uncle gamzee?

>Tavros seems taken aback by the question. Then appears thoughtful.

>TAVROS: Oh,,, uh,,,,

>TAVROS: No??

>TAVROS: But, yes,,, i can gather how you might draw that conclusion,,,

>JOHN: you can?

>JOHN: why?

>TAVROS: It just seems like a thing that would eventually happen to me, does it not?

This might be a burning trash fire, but it has its moments.

Still mentions that Jade wants Dave bad, so they're mad.

Why the fuck is Dirk suddenly a villain

>Hussie collab'd for these two paths
>yfw he was working on the true ending in secret after the first two routes basically went scorched earth on what had transpired thus far

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Does not sound like Tavros at all to be honest.

Different Tavros.

Because it's not. Tavros is Jake and Jane's son.

How many sex scenes are here?

I've only read the Meat part so far but I'm wondering what the fucking point of this epilogue is.

More than you'd think.

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I am curious why they would name their kid after Tavros or was it some super weird coincidence?

>suddenly

Did you manage to forget literally everything he ever did? He seemed to have overcome some of his bullshit, but it was all left very open ended. And now we know he didn't. He still only sees himself as a real person.

Because Gamzee is fucking Jane and literally cucking Jake.

He braces his shaking hands on the podium and tries to catch his breath. His mouth is filling with saliva, much like it does when he’s about to throw up. Or when he’s desperately, devastatingly aroused. Jake, are you aroused in public, thinking about your ex? And in such tight shorts.

Sorry, I’m overdoing it. That should be enough. Dude’s about to pop off. The words erupt from his mouth like a tragic, Dirkthirsty Vesuvius:

JAKE: I love dirk!
JAKE: IM IN *LOVE* WITH DIRK!!!

And to love Dirk is to obey him.

What would Dirk want him to do in this situation? Definitely not sell out his good and dear friend Jane for a loudmouthed pipsqueak who noisily transcends failure even as he redefines it. Do good by her, Jake. Do good by me.

narrator dirk still fucking with him

>Jane is a rape fetishist
>Jake is a cuck
>the bull is Gamzee

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Because Gamzee is Jane's bull. I shit you not.

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/OURTROLL/ ERIDAN FUCKING WON IN THE END!!!!

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Jade's a fucking SLUT

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That's too good of an idea to actually happen, but I can hope.

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Jade's a slut now I don't like this

I just want John to pull a Zeus and impregnate EVERYONE!

I AM KARKAT AND VRISKA FUCKS DAVE, JADE, MEENAH AND TEREZI IN THE REAL EPILOGUE AND I AM A PROUD KEK.

SCREENCAP THIS.

>now

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>Jane is Trump
wtf i love jane now

Even Caliborn?

She dies like a birth in Meat

In Candy, the mother grub makes a clone baby of her and Rose and Kanaya adopt her

>now
Where have you been?

So what you're saying is that we're going to be waiting another three years for another epilogue.

Jade was always a slut.

>Third path opens
>Act 8

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Et tu?

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>23 year old John fucked 16 year old Terezi

That's too good of an idea to happen.

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Based

I forget how Vriska A came to be. What happened to make her such a weenie?

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Even femCaliborn. Not Caliope. FemCaliborn.

DIRK: I’m sorry, Jake.
DIRK: But I’ll never let you break my heart again.

One page narrator dirk's talking about how canon davekat is and then this.

Lol people actually like this?

>the guy that wants davekat is a controlling evil asshole
What did he mean by this

Dirk was right.

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Why did we get fandom jade and not fandom aradia or fandom rose?

He was the one who kept fucking everything up, then he blames Jake. What a cunt.

redpilled

He meant "burn the crops and salt the earth such that nothing my grow here again"

Because fandom Jade was always real Jade.

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Okay now what about the other route?

Hehehe

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>ROXY: for one... dirk is gay
>ROXY: and isnt rose gay too???
>DAVE: yeah idk if anybody knows what roses deal is exactly
>DAVE: of all of us who couldve ended up eloping to have illicit incestuous relations they definitely wouldve been the last two idve put my money on

Man, this comic really REALLY tries it's hardest not to say bisexual it's almost funny.

>Jane regularly gets high on trcikster mode candy

HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAH JADE ACTUALLY BECAME A COCK THIRSTY BREEDSLUT???? You guys were right all along

INNOCENT JADE
IS
GONE

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>breedslut
half right user

Everyone abandoned her while finding the Juju, and John told her she was a bad person. So she tossed her entire identity out, and fell back on her old coping methods in just about the most terrible environment possible for her. Instead of a thick shell of Mindfang covering who she was, she had a paper thin veneer of Meenah, with nothing underneath.

She still really wants kids.

She is not a slut if they are both her husbands.

Also she is biologically male so she is a chad fucking 2 twinks

>this fucking shit

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>Also she is biologically male
What

Is it now canon that Jade has a dog dick?

>her husbands
Technically only one is her husband. Karkat leaves before Jade and Dave get married.

>John constantly miserable, hates the shit out of Vriska now
>Vriska appears, they immediately bond over what a fucking shitshow everything is

I love these dorks.

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None of this is canon.

>Is it now canon that
You might as well prepend any question about whatever's going on in these epilogues with those words.

I wonder if John knocks her up too.

It was stated that both are her boyfriends tho.

Is it finally all over? Am I fucking free yet? I thought I was done with this shit in 2016.

Keep reading. Karkat leaves the relationship.

I'm not reading all of this shit just to find out if the epilouge's good or not.

What makes no sense since they have ZERO chemistry in the comics, they are not even friends in the comics.

you were supposed to be done with this shit in 2016. that's what hussie's telling you here. earlier it was a polite suggestion. he gave you a nice anime light show and showed you the door. but you kept demanding more, and now he's telling you to fuck off.

Why are the pages about this dumb election plot so much longer than the ones about John going to defeat Lord English and actually ending the story of Homestuck

Not even fucking close.

Can't we get something normal for once in our fucking lives.

God I know, Jade was never interested in Dave. Did they even ever talk?

Where's classpectanon?

Hussie is upset about Drumpf probably

It does nothing to satiate any desire for proper closure, or even just a good story. As a vehicle for some fun and interesting stuff happening? It's fine.

Read Candy first, it's much more upfront about the plot being fucking dumb, and is more willing to be stupid and funny.

How are there already 400 replies?
I have not even finished reading meat yet

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this makes it sound way better than it actually is

It's not that big of an epilogue you pussy.

Sorry I actually like to Digest what I read you faggot fan of the fandom

Yeah basically.

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Dirk's always been manipulative as fuck

>he thinks we're actually reading it

Crying about how everything is ruined probably.

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They're going to be looked back on as the most embarassing moment for literally everything.

AHAHAHHA are Dave and Karkat dickless virgins??

>Jade fucks chess people
AHAHAHAHAHA

What do you desire, user?

Okay, to be fair, I do find the idea of LE eating John's hammers to be pretty funny. How about some fanart?

>AHAHAHHA are Dave and Karkat dickless virgins??
Yes

Vriska fucked Gamzee. Against her will.

Just thought you should know.

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>Did you manage to forget literally everything he ever did?
He did a lot of stuff by himself and considered the other kids "immature" but he never did anything bad to them. Also it was pretty clear that he was the only one that tried to help the others on solving their problems while Jake,Jane and Roxy never even asked about his.

Sorry but this feels like another retcon to paint him as a jerk just like they did to him when he was Dave big brother.

And then strangles him to death and has a heart-to-heart with her genetic duplicate on his corpse, so really it's a net positive.

Holy f8cking shit.

Jade has dog hormones...

Yeah, he never did anything. Nothing like, say, manipulation and coercion to get Jake to be his boyfriend, at which point he was apparently a controlling dick bag. No. Of course not.

meat was mostly garbage but i liked john's parts and dirk vs calliope
candy was full on unredeemable dogshit even ironically

>The four are released from the juju
>Rose and jade instantly die

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She's a horny puppydog WHORE that spends her days taking as many dicks as she can get her hands on.

>manipulation and coercion to get Jake to be his boyfriend

Yeah fucking sociopath, you can't just flirt with people that's like rape.

Getting someone to make out with your decapitated head under threat of your own death does not constitute "flirting".

You don't even need to edit that or anything. It's perfect.

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hard same

I mean yeah, but it fucked you up still didn't it? I'm sure at least some vrisrezifags were fucked up.

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in b4 this is a reference to the stories of Dave cosplayers getting mad pussy from Jade cosplayers at conventions.

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Jade is the one who gets dick, Dave's just lucky he was picked as the consort she'd finally settle down with.
The question is does she get dick on the side after they're married?

Please let this be it. I know narrator dirk for meat, and english for candy, but I don't care.

Nepeta was mentioned once. That's about it.

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>Everyone trusting Gamzee

EVERYONE IN THIS COMIC IS FUCKING STUPID EXCEPT KARKAT

HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU TRUST LORD ENGLISH RIGHT HAND LIKE THAT, HE SHOULD BE ROOTING IN PRISON FOREVER FOR SEVERAL GENOCIDAL ACTS

he straight up has a dog dick

>we're gonna kill gamzee
>but not before he fucks vriska
the absolute fucking state of homestuck

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you expect caliope to enforce logic and consequences in her shitty "uwu softbois" fic.

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So uh I got pretty far into homestuck but never ended up finishing it.
Why does all of this sound like erotic fan fiction?

Eh. Maybe if was actually A Thing, but it just ends with a dead clown, one of the better chatlogs in the epilogue, and possible Scourge reunion, so it's fine ny me. Plus it shits all over Gamzee "redemption arc" people so that's fun.

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it literally is

Because it is.

Remember the whole lollipop sequence in act 6? The entirety of the candy epilogue is basically that. Except now they're not teens but young adults. Everyone is fucking boners mad, even the ones who are aware of shit not being right.

It's like they're all forced to inhale laughing gas. They don't necessarily trust him, but the fever-dream-esque nature of Earth C makes them tolerate him anyway.

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I mean Meat isn't much better

I recognize that reference.

Based and Jojopilled

boss of wheels reporting in

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based

Well it fucked ME up, I can tell you that much

>Plus it shits all over Gamzee "redemption arc" people so that's fun.
But yeah, this bit was definitely the saving grace for me. It shits on all the dumb fucking clownfags who thought Gamzee could have a 'redemption arc'. All of these people have no idea how or why Gamzee operates in the comic the way he does. He doesn't fucking need a 'redemption'. He's a fucking slave to LE's plans, that's all he was and that's all he will be; with a side of oh-so entertaining clown antics.

basd WheelCahd

Is the 5% Gamzee good? I don't care much for the others

he been a bitch ass naughty motherfucker
and he's here to fuckin *redeem* his motherfuckin self

I think Hussie is easily the ugliest numale I have ever seen
I would honestly never show my face if I were him

I maintain he is the ugliest webcomic author out there.

>Is the 5% Gamzee good?
Only if you enjoy Gamzee at all. Which is to say, he is the exact fucking same.

Meat

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More like MSWordAdventures

Davepeta IS Nepeta, so Nepeta killed Lord English

Andrew Hussie is a cowardly cur who doesn't have the wherewithal to deliver the content that his fans actually want.

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he made the right choice to just piss everyone off.

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Context? Is this about John fertilizing Roxy and Terezi?

He looked alright when young, I think is just his current style that don't fit his face at all.

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God it is weird to see the characters you knew as kids for so long be explicitly sexual, but I like it

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No, its from “cool and awesome new web comic”, a fan parody of homestuck

Well you don’t say, beat my candy.

HE FUCKING MADE IT BROS

They dragged LE into the black hole. Which was inside Calliope's (or dead Jade) eyes? But he's still not dead apparently?

Yeah but that's nothing new. That's like, a regular occurence since act 5 pretty much.

Candy route says no.

Speaking of candy route, how the fuck are the ghosts existing on candy earth C anyways? They fall out cracks and don't fade out of existence because?

noncanon

But what's the context? John coming by to pork his concubine before moving on to the next?

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>Hussie trying way too hard to be inclusive and tumblr shit
>not a single non white character in any homestuck story so far

Weird, I mean I could understand if Hussie lived in the middle of some small rural village in south Germany but as an american that lived his entire life in big cities?

SHALL WE OPEN Another thread after this one reaches it's limit?

>They fall out cracks and don't fade out of existence because?

I wasn't even aware that that was a fucking rule (i.e. ghosts disappearing in non-dreambubble planes), Meenah didn't know it either. Which makes me think this was made up on the spot. Which then begs the question... what about Aradia when she was dead?

none of them are any race

... except black. they are all motherfucking WHOTE

absolutely

Why? What's there to talk about?

Nu-Hussie will tell you as much.

However, both Dirk (Bro) and Dave were canonically described as pasty ass white bois. Thanks to ectobiology all the kids are related to each other. Add 2 plus 2 together.

I don't know why Andrew Hussie hating Homestuck as much as I do brings me such joy, but I'm going to enjoy this glow for as long as I can.

you got anything better to do?

I plan to go fap to porn of slutty Jade, so yeah.

if terezi is pregnant with john's hybrid kid

>get subjected to both this and the end of hellboy in the same week
i think i kind of deserved this but i don't know what i did

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you couldn't leave well enough alone

They are all based on white people sterotypes. Their names are extremely white.

They are all clearly white.

wouldn't that be amazing.

I wonder what Viz media is thinking about right now

i think they got what they deserved.

i think we all did.

They paid a million dollars for this.
Poor guys.

Torn between hysteria and despair. I suspect they will somehow harm Hussie, by law or by force, not comprehending that he does no longer give a fuck.

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>Rose was the one that got bimbofied

Holy shit

youtube.com/watch?v=FKZcffLcUrM

At least something good came.

80 pages is too much. I'm a boomer now, I can't read all this shit.

IT ALL COMES CRASHING DOWN

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i genuinely think this is the end of the line for hussie, at least as a creative figure. at a minimum i think he's going to retire.

Vriska is the fucking 8est

>Only the kids, guardians, and Spades Slick
Take me fucking back

Can we get an edit of that with Jane pls

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I will never not think of Dark Angels while looking at this shirt.

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So wait, is this the absolute last bit of Homestuck media being produced? There's nothing after this?

>dave having an emotional breakdown over being gay when he's being doggy dicked by jade daily

Uh bro hiveswap bro

Not by the looks of it

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wew

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Explain pages

>hiveswap 2 will never exist
I feel bad for joey.

lol

ZOO WEE MAMA

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They are fucking gar8age.

>Dave: Mr President I think I'm gay
>Trump: No, you are a dogfucker, a tremendous dogfucker, now if you excuse me Jane will help me build the super wall to keep the Mexican trolls out.

This isn't over, Hussie. I will haunt you every waking moment for the rest of my existence. Until you see what you have done wrong.

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Why does breathe have nothing to do with freedom?

What the fuck

>Dad crocker dies secret service style

Truly a hero, but was he mentioned at all in the meat timeline?

>HSG gets Hussed again

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candy is taking the piss

Just finished both, so now I'll sum up the important plot points for those who don't feel like reading the whole thing. Can't say I really blame you.

>Earth C exists within the Black Hole, hence the separation from everything else
>Dirk has begun imprinting himself upon the narration of events, and is currently in a spaceship with Rose and Terezi (and John's dead body) flying towards a planet that they plan to seed, to eventually advance enough to play "the most important game of SBURB"
>English fell into the black hole during the last confrontation
>Alt!Calliope has become something of a God of the black hole, and plans to devour/fuse with English once he descends far enough into the black hole, then leave to go stop Dirk, who's influences on the narration she believes undermines the very concept of existence, instead bending even events he had no hand in to be reflections of his own agenda
>Dave meets Obama, who had played SBURB once before, and knew Dirk somehow. Obama gives Dave a robot body in preparation for events that may dictate the fate of all existence
>Aradia (who is in tight with Alt!Calliope) along with Robot Dave, escape the black hole
>John's retcon powers aren't just the ability to travel through canon, he may be subconsciously warping all reality without even realizing it

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They both are. They're both such god damn garbage.

>hussie holds the entire remaining hiveswap budget.png

Jade marrying Dave is the only good thing out of all of this.

>against her will
>:?

new thread here

This thread didn't even hit image limit or page 9, why a new thread at all?

no idea how things work on co, the bump-limit was reached, so i thought it was okay.

How many times do I have to make it clear? I hate all you fucking assholes. Homestuck was the biggest mistake of my life. People like to debate whether or not vaccines cause autism. Well, they don't, it's actually fucking Homestuck that does. How else can you explain my fucking fan base? I'm sick of this shit. All I wanted to do was make a cool story. But I guess we're far past that point now. Enjoy your epilogue, bitches. Thanks for all the t-shirt money over the years.

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Yes. If you remember any other time Vriska interacted with Gamzee or were asked for an opinion about him, she very clearly stated every time, that Gamzee is a disgusting fucking asshole and should die.

Yet she seems somewhat confused in Candy, even though she's obviously trying her best to fight it. It's because Earth C is just making everyone so fucking horny. But at least she still finds the strength in her to actually 'kill' him.

How do they kill Lord English?

Thank you user.
I'm fine with it, and I'm sure there's a fair share of anons who are, but you know how the staff reacts to Homestuck.

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absolutely based and redpilled

>Jade wants to and is ABLE to knock Rose up

lightning fucking diamonds, all worth it

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nice fanfic bro

is candy The Masterpiece??

They don't. Alt!Calliope mentions she's stronger than him, and plans on absorbing him.

Okay maybe
>disgusting fucking asshole and should die.
is putting it a bit too strong.

But nonetheless she made it clear that she wants nothing to do with him.

>That LE fight
I should have seen it coming

This is what I get for wanting an awesome fight with beta kid teamwork

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so fucking what? vriska herself admitted a few pages later that it was consensual, not "against her will"

>The black hole cucks Vriska out of the climax
based

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That's actually one of the few bits I liked. It was swift, violent, and made LE out to be incredibly God damned dangerous.

BLACK HOLE SUN
WON'T YOU COME
AND WASH THE RAIN AWAY

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What in the absolute fuck happened to this story

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It wasn't against 'her will' per se, because her will was being warped by the fucking candy influence. That's why she talks likes she's confused. Like everybody else on Earth C, she became retardedly horny and passive. Basically a magnification of what happened with the lolli juju in act 6.

But then she murders Gamzee in cold fucking blood without batting an eye, so it doesn't really matter either way.

this is so much better than the old ending. actually feels like homestuck.

it all makes sense now. these are hussie's true thoughts on homestuck.

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I think hussie actually lost it. And not in the funny "ha ha that wacky huss" kinda way, I think all the years of homestuck and all the dumb drama has actually finally just gotten to him. He's fed up with it, doesn't want to really do this anymore, and is just burning bridges

it was already over. hes just having fun.

We fucking broke him. Instead of doing a school shooting, he did this instead.

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Yeah it's dead fucking obvious that both of these texts (especially Aradia's conversation with 'dead Jade') were meant to be a sort of apology/re-eximantion of what he did with the comic.

Naturally, it falls on completely fucking deaf ears, as far I'm concerned. He let this happen all by himself. He's the one at fault.

And no matter how many times he goes back to re-analyze it, repurpose it, to paint it in a better light, it'll never fucking succeed. You made this comic into a fucking flaming garbage pile, Hussie. You will never wash your name off of it.

this is the face of a kpop fan

>Dave hasn't even finished middle school
nani the fuck

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well yeah they were 13

A MaN StAyS LoCkEd iN AnOtHeR MaN’S HuNgEr tRuNk lOnG EnOuGh aIn’t gOt mUcH LeFt tO FuCkIn hIdE FrOm oNe aNoThEr.

This is just genuinely retarded.

its hilarious

yeah but he didn't even finish on Earth C?

why would he bother? he's been out of school for 3 years already by that point, and also he's a literal fucking god.

Jhon god tiered into Boss of Wheels

So, most of us picked "Meat" first, I guess?

I did
I haven't read Candy yet, and I'm kind of afraid to

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You can read them in whatever order you like. But you have to take both.

candy. i think i might pass on meat.

retard

>plans on absorbing him
>>plans on
So wait, its STILL not over?

No. In fact, this is less an Epilogue, more just a prologue to try and drum up interest for whatever the fuck. An attempt to make Hiveswap matter? I don't know.

im down for an eternal trainwreck at this point

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never mind I found it

and now I got the context too. although at first looked like there was... something else going on..

>that border
you have to go back