It's a "Clark befriends a future villain" episode

This is your assignment for the day Yea Forums. Watch this clip, click reply and type a brief response. Responses due by the end of the day

youtube.com/watch?v=NLYEExrAEJI

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Back when bromance was just "subtly" homoerotic

Oh my that looks bad

I actually looked it up and it's fucking true. Holy Jesus, that's funny as fuck.

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Dude you gotta do a deep dive on this one. This story is insane and it keeps getting crazier as more details come out. Check out her branding her initials into followers.

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>child porn accusations
>sex slave rings
>shady business practices
>whatthefuckisthiscompanyevenabout.jpg
I don't know if I really want to, but I'm an investigating type of person - so let's just jump right into it!

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>it's a Chloe tries to get Clark into her weird sex cult episode

>currently in plea negotiations
>wants to go back to acting

foxnews.com/entertainment/allison-mack-is-in-active-plea-negotiations-to-avoid-trial-for-alleged-involvement-in-nxivm-sex-cult

Holy fuck who would hire her after that?

Roman Polanski or Bryan Singer

Have the actor who played Clark or Rosenbaum commented on any of the sex cult stuff? Rosenbaum is famous for being a cool guy and they worked together for a decade.

youtube.com/watch?v=2Us0ui6c3Lk

Damn if you look at as Superman and and flash it's pretty much a set-up for justice league.

Take that away, and look at these two guys talk. You see a lot of Broke-back overtones.

>clark
>those were for charity

Smallville is kino in comparison to literally every cape show afterwards. Even the cinematography is better than pretty much every current show. Sure, there were many mediocre episodes but the show as a whole still holds up perfectly fine. The only shows that could be considered objectively better are Daredevil, Titans, and Doom Patrol even though from a photography POV, none of them is better

>Daredevil
Mixed bag the show. After a decent first season season two was god awful and then season three was back to decent

Remember when the Duke boys got back together? It was so kino that YouTube thinks it's actually from Dukes of Hazzard
youtube.com/watch?v=NLRveAh68og

Season 2 was pointless, yeah, but the show itself was great as a whole. Hey, I'm not going to praise Smallville and not another show that does some things right and some wrong. There are always ups and downs

Watch that random scene and tell me it doesn't look better than literally the entirety of the current CW shows

Smallville drinking game
Take a drink when
>Jonathan tells Clark, "You have to be careful, son," or some close variation.
>Lex looks at his father with hateful disdain.
>Lana or Whitney say "aboot" or "soory"
>Aunt Nell is sporting cleavage
>Clark gets weakened by kryptonite
>You see someone you think will turn out to be the freak of the week
>Take another drink if you see that person "infected" by meteor rocks
>You see the "Wall of Weird"
>Lex has to describe he's different from his father.
>You can see hair stubble on Michael Rosenbaum's supposed-to-be-bald head.
>You can see beard stubble on Tom Welling's supposed-to-be-16 face.
>Clark says "I'm sorry," when someone talks about the meteor shower.
>You hear a line that you swear you first heard in one of the Superman movies.
>You count more than a five second awkward silence between Clark and Lana.
>Lex flirts with Clark.
>Lionel Luthor tells Lex that "this is a test," or a close variation.
>Martha says nothing while Jonathan goes on a rant.
>The Freak of the Week goes "You don't know what it's like to be different!"
>The Freak of the Week dies.
>Someone learns Clark's secret.
>Roger Nixon shows up.
>A reference to Superman is made. For example, Clark goes "I can't imagine flying."
>Lana mentions her dead parents.
>The Freak of the Week argues with his or her parents.
>The Freak of the Week's parent dies.
>A regular character's parent dies.
>Whitney gets in a car wreck.
>You see the Kents' green flyswatter.
>The bands Remy Zero, The Calling, or Lifehouse are heard in the episode.
>The guest star of the week is someone you've seen in another TV program.
>Clark throws a bad guy.
>You see Kristin Kreuk's body double dressed in skimpy clothing.
>Lex saves the day.
>A character is running in really lame slow motion while being attacked by bees.
>The "bullet time" motion is used.

Take two drinks when

>Pete has more than three lines in a row.
>Pete has lines, but they're badly dubbed like a karate cinema movie.
>The freak of the week is shirtless.
>Gabe Sullivan makes a joke about poop.
>The person you first thought was going to be the meteor freak, actually wasn't.
>The Freak of the Week has really bad hair.
>Lex makes Clark blush.
>We actually see Lana's parents' gravestone.
>Lana is riding a horse.
>There is an abundance of Chloe-avage.
>You see Principal Kwan.
>You see a skateboard.
>A police deputy has more than one line.
>You have trouble understanding what Victoria (Kelly Brook) just said.
>You see Zoe Garfield.
>Clark is shirtless.
>Roger Nixon is chewing bubble gum.
>You actually hear the word "kryptonite."
>You actually see the words "Daily Planet."
>Chloe mentions her cousin in Metropolis.
>Someone calls up the Smallville Ledger, Smallville Torch, or LuthorCorp websites.
>Someone other than Whitney gets in a car wreck.
>Someone actually mentions the planet Krypton by name.
>A character gets jealous

Finish your drink if

>Michael Rosenbaum's chest hair is visible.
>Jonathan says something nice to Lex Luthor.
>You see either one of Whitney's parents or one of Pete's parents.
>A character belches.
>Someone says the words "Mizz Lang" to Lana.
>Dominic Senatori comes to town.
>Rogue cop Sam Phelan shows up in an episode OTHER than "Rogue."
>The episode is over and the Freak of the Week *wasn't* a bad guy.
>The episode is over and there was no Freak of the Week.
>You see Enrique, Manservant of Evil.
>The band playing at the high school dance is lip-synching.
>If you happen to have the same name as the Freak of the Week

That's not a drinking game, it's a suicide pact

Who the FUCK was Whitney anyway? Just some generic Chad McJockson they threw in there for no genuine reason?

BASED

what the fuck

Goddamn John Schneider is gorgeous. In this whole FUCK ME DADDY tumblr gurl age he would be huge.

Still funny to me that Clark was 14 at the start of the series but already a 6'3 chad

>Flash did a call back to this

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When?

>In this whole FUCK ME DADDY tumblr gurl age he would be huge
uhh
maybe not

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youtube.com/watch?v=rJYRW_ZFiOE

Well, that's TV budget, and feels a bit homosexual.

>implying that he's taboo wouldn't turn the Tumblr girls on more

Yep, just to give Clark that season 1 angst

didnt work with chris pratt

He was Clark's Not Flash Thompson

God I miss these corny ass moments in TV

God damn did I love the set up of Lex and Clark as friends. I wish we could get it again in any other media, bonus points if you have Bruce too as their three amigos.

Plus:

agcwebpages.com/BLINDITEMS/2019/MARCH.html
>234. ENTERTAINMENT LAWYER 03/19 **#6**
>This former A- list mostly television actress turned sex trafficker/cult leader is hooking up with at least two people to pay for her legal defense. One is a shocker. Allison Mack (NXIVM) (Sex slave cult recruiter Allison Mack is negotiating a plea deal as leader Keith Raniere pleads not guilty to additional charges of child pornography)

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I remember reading on this site that someone working on Spider-Man: Homecoming was intentionally diversifying the cast, but they wouldn't say who it was and that they'd reveal it a later date as well as why they were doing that. Anything come from that?

>When the music kicks in.

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>Blonde
>Jock
>bully main character in literal first appearance
>dating the main character's high school crush
>near the end of the high school segment they start getting along
>until the jock goes off to war
>jock is now a hero and highly respected
>and something terrible happens to him
Clockwork

How the fuck did you miss
>Lex or Lionel starts a speech by referencing a historical figure
I felt like drinking just to kill brain cells after sitting through four seasons of that.

That site became useless when they started accepting anonymous tips. The day Gunn got fired from Disney the site was flooded with 50,000 rumors of him running a secret pedophile ring in his basement with the aid of Nancy Pelosi. Just another diarrhea den for /pol/ and MAGA twitter

I feel like the creators just wanted to do a Spider-Man show but couldn't get the rights because of the Raimi films

Since nobody did I guess I will.
SOMEBODY SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVE ME

>Allison Mack
>A-list

>The Freak of the Week dies

Usually by being knocked into/crushed by/impaled on a conveniently placed piece of farm equipment.

Someone execute that host

>not liking Theo Von
Man is pure southern entertainment
youtube.com/watch?v=mkRrvq2cd7w

>American """""culture""""""

Why everyone thinks this is gay?

Because our culture has become so poisoned that close bonds between men are seen as homosexual.

Shut up closet fag

Case in point

Remember when bromance used to be called friendship?

Ooh, "case in point"
Nice faggy expression, poindexter

Dumb discord tranny

Good god what.

The nerd is getting angry! What are you gonna do, cumbucket? Throw your glasses at me?

This is your brain on HRT

"It must have something to do with these meteor rocks"

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Aw, the little dweeb's gonna cry! Boo hoo hoo! Go back to your comics, geek!

>It's an Allison Mack trafficking kids episode

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>it feels like today

>it's a "the real villain was inside us all along" series

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>en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smallville
>Developed by Alfred Gough, Miles Millar

>en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alfred_Gough
>2004 Spider-Man 2 Story by Co-wrote story with Miles Millar and Michael Chabon

>en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miles_Millar
>Spider-Man 2 (2004) (writer)
Funny you should mention the Raimi films

>Clark and Lana almost get together but due to plot shenanigans they drift apart again
>Clark can't explain what happened to Lana without revealing his true nature
>Lana gives Clark her 11000th ultimatum and leaves the barn
>Clark is left alone and all depressed
>YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL
>YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL
>YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL IT'S TRUE
>song keeps playing as the credits roll

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Yikes. Go dilate your wound in some other thread.

>funposting is now illegal
What happened to this board?

>Smallville drinking game
I drink when Lex is drinking

An episode of Hot Ones starring Theo came out today

Lana is still the worst cw female in a cw cape show.

Fact.

The plots surrounding Lana were worse than Lana herself.
100% of the time.

anyone in Hollywood, place is an absolute fucking degenerate scum pit.

let's really put this into perspective, the Porn Industry is legit more friendly and nice than Hollywood.

Okay but for real, that was actually a pretty clever story about how to break Superman’s heart. Make him think he has what he has always wanted only to take it away from him in a way he can’t fix

best part is the funder for the Cult is Sara Bronfman, one of the richest, most well connected people in the entire world.

beyond the branding of random actresses this cult did some serious fucking child trafficking, if Allison thinks she's getting off she's retarded, Bronfman and Co. are already heavily connected, she won't have any dirt to save her, unlike Bronfman who I think Roman Polanski'ed herself off to somewhere.

oh yea i forgot about lanas chad boyfriend

WITCH AUNT

So did Lana once she got on the Super dick

Yeah, the witch stuff was just boring overall.

But Clark learning that magic exists, and that it affects him, was great. Like, that's a fantastic gag where his parents find him in the barn.

Hey remember that time Jor-El brainwashed some random girl into thinking she was Kryptonian in order to lure Clark to the Fortress and then he just vaporized her or something once he was done using her?
Hey remember that time Doomsday was a paramedic who killed Jimmy Olsen but actually that wasn't Jimmy, it was his older brother but for some reason no one called him by his first name?
Hey remember that time they wanted to put Batman in the show but they couldn't so they turned their supposed Batman character into some weird psycho villain?
Hey remember that time they did put Batman in the show but he was called Green Arrow for some reason?
Hey remember that time Clark dated some Native American chick for literally one episode before she died?
Hey remember that time Clark dated a literal yandere?

Remember when it turns out that Jor-El came to Earth in the fucking 50's, was a greaser, and had a relationship with Lana's great-aunt?

What a show, man.

>Hey remember that time they wanted to put Batman in the show but they couldn't so they turned their supposed Batman character into some weird psycho villain?
And then they put him in the comics and also did, well basically did, The Batman Who Laughs too.

Him tough talking unconscious bodies in the comics was fucking great.

Honestly the high point of this year's cw crossover

>Hey remember that time Clark dated a literal yandere?
Alicia was and still is best girl for Clark
>Alicia is now Cicada on Flash

Tom Welling needs to be in CRISIS

You think that's bad, wait until you find out about Teen Wolf.

Have you seen him lately?

Wait for it.

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Laura Vandervoort still looks pretty good

I remember seeing him on Lucifer
He looks good for his age

John Glover voices Mr. Mind in a post-credits scene
Y/N?

>user 1: Man Whitney is basically just Flash Thompson, huh?
>user 2: I feel like the creators of the show really wanted to make a spiderman show but couldnt write spiderman because of the raimi films
>user 3: But user, they wrote one of those too
>You, a retard: T-Teen Wolf

Chloe was my childhood crush. I'm still not sure how to feel about what happened.

He's Sivana Sr.

>Have you seen him lately?
Perfect for an Old Superman

Hey, just be hopeful it doesn't forever tarnish the series and make WB bury it forever. Cuz they might.

Fuck you Clark, Lex was the best friend you ever had! All he wanted was for you to tell him the truth even when he knew your secret!

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The greatest tragedy of the plot
But Lex didn't have to full autist and have even the fucking car he crashed into Clark framed in that creepy museum

Titans suffers from weak writing and excess of Cereal Lord stupidity (which, I'll grant, is almost the same problem). If S1 didn't exist, I'd throw Legends on your list in its place.

I couldn't get past the first few episodes of the first season of DD so I'll not criticize or remark on your selection of that either way, save that most of SV was shot during the day time and in sunshine whereas a lot of DD, even trailers of later seasons, looks like it's shot at night.

Yes but Lex being his friend was just the badly written fanfic of the writers

He COULD lose that weight, he hasn't yet reached Dain Cain levels of uselessness - plus he probably would want to get laid still

Holy shit why don't I remember wanting to fuck martha when this show was on. She's a fuckin fox

>Glover's absolute chad hold

>an absolute bullshit bait and switch was the highlight
I mean it was pretty bad at times but damn

>Tom and Michael doing everything in their power to not mention that during the podcast they did together.
Good times.

Let me be honest with you, right know it's gay, back then I didn't see it like that... it was awesome having an universe of heroes, well at least it was back then.

Clark just couldn't handle Lex's autism

That was a solid episode of Inside of You

>They will never release a BD boxset of the series

>I have no reason to stay in Smallville.
>You have me.
Gaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

>Clark is shirtless.
No survivors.