Realistically, how would a superhero work irl without looking like a complete dumbass?

Don't dress like you're Batman or Superman
Dress like you're Punisher or Red Hood. Casual enough that you don't stand out
And at least have a logo/symbol. But not something common. The last thing you need is an innocent getting stabbed because you wore the Punisher logo so now every drug dealer thinks anyone in a Punisher shirt must be you

>solve crime
>tell the police instead of going there yourself to punch people

powerlisting.wikia.com/special:random

What would you do and what do you think would happen to you?

Bet you won't tell him he looks stupid to his face

One word. Rorsharch.

His mask is silly.

>Reflection Destruction

I'd become a merc/assassin of some kind

1. Actually be athletic
2. know your shit
3. have a form of martial arts that's legit
4. have a neatly designed costume and a good name
5. have confidence w./ out looking like a dork
6. BE STREET SMART in fact be smart period
7. always come prepared
8. Be brave, don't be stupid
9. listen to what citizens say to you.
10. don't be ignorant

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Freeze_Vision

Probably get shot or do nothing, it's not like I have the skills to track down pedo rings.

you know, I actually considered these kinds of things when making a superhero story.

Some tricks the guy tried was that he was deliberately erratic about his activity, sometimes skipping school (which he didn't have much regard for), other times staying out late, changing up 'costumes' (including wearing shoes to alter height), driving odd distances around into other cities up to thirty miles away, rarely ever operating more than two nights in a row, and so on.

He still gets figured out though.

And the time period is the 1960's.

Superheroes would be employed by the government as one-man SWAT crews/counter supervillain agents/costumed celebrities, and actual vigilantes going it on their own would be rare as fuck. I estimate there would be a 3:1 supervillain-superhero ratio, and most supervillains would be motivated by money and working with gangs, or ideologically driven fanatics committing sporadic acts of terrorism and trying to network with other ideologues. Imagine if /pol/ got superpowers, then started networking. That's what we'd be looking at.

Yes, just let the police and "elected" officials mete out all the justice.

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>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Adaptive_Augmentation

I guess I become the party tank of whatever superheroes I join.

Ironically, this is pretty shitty for vigilante work unless I can actively add adaptations to myself. In which case all I need is just the ability to change my appearance and move like hell and I'm fucking set.

I don't even know if the RLSH community is still active. Most of them seemed like Kickassia nerds LARPing and calling the cops. That instigating faggot Zimmer and his crew probably dissolved into Antifa. Master Legend is based, but doesn't do much and lives a pretty empty life. The only decent ones are those who use their persona to help raise charities first and take action second.

>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Life_Magic
I am now a Golemancer. Cool shit, but I don't think it'd be useful for much more than transporting large quantities of drugs or door-kicking for the police, depending on which way I want to go.

Depends completely on the power set. Low level would have to be an assassin, high level could do whatever they fucking wanted.

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Internet_Manipulation
I would use this to steal money, control elections, and establish a world order of my choosing. We live in a post truth world, and I just got the ability to control a new narrative.

No. This is dark and it subverts the social contract superheroes have with the public.

> powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Maximum_Brain_Capacity

I would not use this to beat up muggers. maybe figure out the structure of a crime organization or something.

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Remote_Hypnosis

What wouldn't I do?

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powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Despair_Embodiment

I guess im op

>me

You guys wanna form a super group together?

Realistically the most effective "superhero" type person, dressed in a "superhero" type outfit, would essentially have to be a Splinter Cell operative.

Covert, sneaky as shit, takes out key specific targets be it a person, a vehicle, a building, a machine, etc., steals a lot of evidence of crimes and wrongdoings, and absolutely ready and willing to ice motherfuckers with a knife to the neck or heart.

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They wouldn't. Superheros as a concept are fucking retarded

>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Science_Embodiment
>The literal embodiment of technological advancement, only gets stronger as time goes on
let's see you find out who i am now faggots

Nope. Otherwise I wouldn't have suggested him. It would work IRL.

>tfw have an actual superpower
>just makes your life more inconvenient
I fucking hate my ears

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>Nah, I think the much bigger hurdle to overcome would be how do you do what Batman does and not immediately get branded by the media as a racist when you keep on beating up black people.

Wouldn't last against the first armed thug, the way martial arts and stealth work in comics is because of plot armor. Batman carries around roughly 80 pounds of equipment on his person if we're to believe that he has an endless amount of grapple guns, batarangs, smoke bombs, and whatever stuff he jams up his ass every night on top of whatever body armor he's wearing. That means someone trying to make it like Batman is A) Going to be heavy as shit and have a bunch of shit hanging off of them, making them unstealthy as fuck when their heavy footfalls and all that rustling of shit gives them away, B) Tired as all hell wearing that shit, reducing their fighting effectiveness if they DO find an easy target to attack, and C) Leave too much evidence to track behind, making it far easier to pin down the vigilante.

Unlike in comics, people can look up, they won't miss some asshole dressed up like some knob watching them from atop a convenience store.

>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Life_Infusion
i guess i would try to be a messiah type and de-weaponize weapons?

Batman shit would get the FBI after your ass. X-men shit would be used for military purposes.

Unironically this.

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What's your superpower dork

Hup-to, user

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>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Life_Connection
>User is connected to any/all life and living things, so that as long as they exists life does as well. This allows them to have both an emotional and spiritual link to every form of life, so if the target feels pain or is injured all living things would feel the same pain and/or possibly gain the same wounds as the user.
>If the user ever dies or is killed then life itself may cease to exist as well.

Yeah, nah, this power fucking sucks. When I go, everyone fucking goes.

Well the optimum thing is "Super" hero. Not just some retard in a colorful suit. When you can lift a bus most people won't call you a retard to your face.

I can hear certain radio waves as a kind of extremely high whine. Apparently it's a known issue, but to me it's as loud as nails on a chalkboard right up against my ear. I have to wear little earplugs with aluminum inside or I can't even function most days because the sound is unbearable.

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Big_Rip_Inducement

>Capabilities
>The user can cause the Big Rip, progressive tearing apart of the universe >through accelerated expansion.

>Applications
>Omnicide
>Reality Sundering
>Universe Destruction

G-guys... I think I'm the super villain.

Blood clotting...
I guess I'd just give people strokes when I felt appropriate...

Damn dude, sounds like you need to train your ears, yuo have so much latent power if only you would use it for Good

do u mean...tinnitus?? or is this a real thing?

This guy is actually a badass
youtu.be/2dCm2l0JYYg
I don't think they're active anymore. I heard a rumour that Pheonix Jones is trying to move from Seattle to like Colorado or some place near that area.

There are vigilantes in real life, they just don't dress like bats. It's probably safer to be in the Davao Death Squad than to be targeted by them. I'm telling you man, the racism PR issue would be way more of a problem than any safety concerns.

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ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/14628312/
I can't find much about but it's at least something that appears to exist, though it sounds like if he's got it it's a lot more extreme than usual.

>Don't fight Genghis Khan, it'll just lead to anarchy and more violence!
>Don't fight the British Monarchy, it'll just lead to anarchy and more violence!
>Don't fight Hitler, it'll just lead to anarchy and more violence!

sick, im pretty sure im a "supersmeller" but i cant afford the test, though i can smell VERY well, and am even able to pick out individual scents from clusters, which is easier if i recognize the scent but certainly not impossible otherwise. it has limited practical use beyond inciting my friends to tell me things like sneezes dont have scents (they do)

t. quintessentially British child peddler

Is the question
>How do you be a superhero IRL with actual super powers without looking like a dumbass?
Or
>How do you be a superhero IRL without actual super powers without looking like a dumbass?
If the former - depending on your powers nobody will say you look stupid to your face. If all else: no capes, no dumb logos, no undies on the outside, no bright garish colors. Basically wear the opposite of what superman wears.
The latter - you'll always look stupid.

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powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Ursine_Physiology

get raped by gay furries

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Internet_Manipulation

Destroy the credit score and donate the savings of criminals into a charity. Claim its the doing of that hacker Yea Forums.

Why does this shit make me feel?

>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Meta_Power_Manipulation
Fuckin' lame.

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>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Mental_Disorder_Manipulation
Forget vigilantism, I'd become the world's greatest criminal psychologist.

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>Don't fight Genghis Khan, it'll just lead to anarchy and more violence!
Yeah, this Mongol/European mutt will impose terrible things like RACE EQUALITY AND RELIGIOUS FREEDOM.

>not making yourself you're own hostage and force life itself to conform to your demands or else everyone fucking dies

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>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Domain_Manipulation
>User can create, shape, manipulate, and distort/warp domains (personal or otherwise); a realm/space, dimension, plane, reality or specific sphere of influence either belonging to or owned by or was once owned by others, the user, anyone or anything.

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I've always been convinced that the age of the superhero will come when humanity manages to create robots and human-like AI.

Two kinds of people.

>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Gluttony_Magic
This is too close to fetish shit. I'd try it once on some shnook, then never again.

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powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Video_Constructs

Sounds pretty rad

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Unnatural_Cooking

i could start a underground restaurant just making simple stuff like pasta or sandwichs

>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Enhanced_Staff_Proficiency
I better be able to have mad bullet deflecting skills or I'm using my enhanced abilities to shove a stick up someone's ass

and we'll just make human torches and red tornados and amazos?

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Synchronization
>synchronization
It wouldn't matter the power I would become a supervillain but this one sounds kinda broken so I guess you're all fucked

>tfw I fantasize about being a billionaire and using my money to help jones fight crime

>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Visual_Memory_Reading

I guess I'd only really use it whenever I had to try and convince/manipulate somebody, or maybe try and get a degree in psychology and make a living treating people. I guess you can use it for torture but that's not my thing.
Pretty boring choice desu

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>superhero
Naw that's just Skynet

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Comedy_Embodiment
Have a laugh.

>Pressure Strike
>The user can strike from a distance by generating with a wave of pressure/shockwave/vacuum.
Maybe become a boxer or some shit like that
WOW,THAT'S A KNOCK OUT,ALMOST LIKE HE DIDN'T TOUCH HIM
Could be cool,kinda dumb

>superhero
You seem to misunderstand the term superhuman. It can't work irl.

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Social_Cloaking
So I'm basically Agent 47, neat. I guess I'd use social cloaking to join the FBI/CIA and learn how to be a spy. Then join the governments of the world to try to learn about them as much as I can.

Just be a vigilante serial killer like dexter Morgan or a Chris-Hansen with a sniper rifle. All you need is a practical mask in the end. If you truly wanted to be a superhero.

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So be like anonymous?

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Blade_Constructs

I´m literally the edgeman, i would love to be a hero, but with this kind of power it could be kinda difficult, i mean i can construct like a bridge or barrier with the metal, but even if that i could hurt people and that without mentioning that if i'm in a place without metal, i pretty much useless.

I might open a store were i sell stuff like cutlery, hunting knifes,swiss knife, etc.. and make infomercials, were i manipulate the blades and tell people to come to the shop

>Don't fight the British Parliament (FTFY), it'll just lead to anarchy and more violence!
Oh no, you could have been Canada! What a terrible fate!

>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Despair_Embodiment
You're gonna get shot by an guy doing air guitar, while eating pizza

>>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Visual_Memory_Reading
user don't you get it, you can bullshit your way into position of power in the world or get favors from the most important people, you can go to see millionaire or celebrity and insert yourself in a memory of time they nedeed someone and get their total trust or friendship, literally you can insert yourself in anyone lives and force them to love you

>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Sanitization
I initially thought this would work in a flimsy janitorial persona, but then realized I could make a lot of money by eating and processing radioactive and/or toxic waste.
Who knows? I might end up with more abilities based on what I eat.
>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Bio-Metal_Physiology

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Because we aren't experiencing these incredible scenarios first-hand.

>Oneiric Physiology
>The power to possess the physiology of an inhabitant of the dream realm. Technique of Dream Manipulation. Variation of Mythic Physiology.
I’m haunting ya dreams

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You know you're good at psy-ops when you're the first thing anyone can see any given day.

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powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Fame_Empowerment
>Fame Empowerment
>The power to gain strength from fame
I get to go from being some schlub narking on drug deals to a literal capeshit hero as long as I keep doing my job. Eventually I become a fucking WWE tier hero, asking audiences on my live streams to type my custom emojis in the chat to give me strength as I suplex real life druglords. Maximize my powers with my own breakfast cereal, comics, and staged wrestling matches against my own league of hired villains.

Shit'll be fun until the government tries to take me away to find out the source of my powers, but I'd hope do to how much I advertise myself, people would just assume I'm some fuck you strong wrestler as opposed to a genuine superhuman.

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Go the Adrian Veidt route and just genocide everyone. No people means no crime.

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Universal_Lordship

Actual those who fought Khan ended up genocided so...

Recently, we had a cop that was killing prostitutes, the black cop that killed corrupt cops and the hicks killing illegals.

Real life vigilantes are usually processed as serial killers.

I really like this idea, its like a more realistic take on OPM, MHA and DC comics all melded together.

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Zombie_Lord_Physiology

This is the most "bad guy" powerset ever. I can't permanently die either. There are a lot of mundane applications I could use with this but I think starting the zombie apocalpyse might be neat

>Planetary Constructs
>Users can turn planetary energy/substances into tools, objects, weapons and other items, create semi-living constructs and/or create structures/buildings of varying permanence. Users who have mastered this ability can use it for almost any situation, creating anything they need.
Guess Ill start learning how to make everything.

>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Physical_Force_Infringement
So I can jump off a plane and survive the fall? Cool

Bump

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Information_Detection
So basically I've gotta be the Question or a perpetual internet sleuth.

Also I'd be the best at finding unsauceable porn.

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Creative_Source

Jesus Christ. If this doesn't grant me immortality then everything ever is fucked after I die.

based genghis poster
unironically though, mongols actually brought huge amounts of trade and free thought

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That's one way to look at it, but there are also a bunch of crazy fucksticks that would want to turn Thanos's plan into 200% retard territory and kill off all life just because they're cunts. I don't want to kill off all life, just the ones of utterly repugnant scumbags.

>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Astrokinetic_Combat

what ever the fuck i want apparently.

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powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Immortality_Bestowal

What the fuck I'm useless

Might as well work for the bad guys and give them immortality for generation just so I don't die

The only way that could work without you faking your death like the ending of dark knight returns would be becoming Iron Man. And only old bald billionaires are able to do that. Also it would be stressfull knowing your earths only hope if aliens invade

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So basically you have two poisons to pick from. Be iron man and have panic attacks everyday because your our only hope if we get enslaved by alien squids. Or become V for Vendetta and go into hiding and leave your life behind, getting by on money stolen from enemies. Also everyone would call you a virgin

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Thats a wild fucking coincidence that i made up a character recently that takes houdini’s name and acts as a robin hood hero who leaves his old identity behind to be a hero 24/7

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Purpose_Perception

What do?

how is fighting a government vigilantism you literal potato

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i don't know if i can be a superhero with a power like this

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Afterlife_Transport

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Star_Destruction

Guess I can suicide the human race

then there's always the chance of random shit happening to you like getting hit by a drunk driver while crossing the street or even simple shit like getting the common cold or flu.

> i'd really like to defeat the terrorists today
>... but i have food poisoning

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Healing_Wave_Emission looks like I just go around healing people.

Why WAS the mouth designed like that again?

I'll eradicate siamese twins and nuclear fusion!

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Shit, forgot link
powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Fusion_Negation

WU LIN GET FUCKED! TAKE YOUR TELEPORTING MONKS AND MAP SWATTING OLD MEN WITH YOU!

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>Realistically
This is your mistake.

> don't wear a costume
Then you are not a superhero, dipshit. Op obviously wants all the trappings of comicbook superheroes. Look at op's pic.

>Mythic Physiology
I guess I can be anything that people bullshit about or write and draw.

The name is donut steel (even though I steal your mythos)

>green fire manipulation

I've seen that Avatar episode so I do nothing with my powers, ever.

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Wait what episode did green fire happen? I'm rewatching the series drink right now

I think Jones is probably best off retiring. Mainly because he's going on like a decade of doing this, has two sons who are up there, and has generally done enough. He's past 30 now and has been taking all kinds of hits. After a certain point it's just too dangerous, especially if his main backup is his wife and a couple of other dudes.

Crime has changed. Gun crime and muggings are down. Opioid deals on private property are up. The new crime wave isn't something a dude in a cape can solve easily.

>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Winter_Magic
>The user is able perform a form of magic that utilizes the season of winter, ice and snow to a variety of effects.
Seems like I'd be useless half the year unless I moved to the right area. Even Anchorage's summer months are too warm.

So unless I'm Frozone I think I'd just use it to stealthily commit justifiable crimes during the winter. I doubt I'd get caught if I was careful.

Nevermind. I'm being retarded. Eternal winter is in there. I'm not going to destroy the goddamned environment but I can white out anyone I want. Assassination by weather. Or just use it as a goddamned shield while I play around. You can't see shit in a true white out.

I remember reading Jon Ronson's book where he met uo with Jones. Jones was either incredibly brave or stupid. There was a part where Jones and his crew confronted some drug dealers working a corner and told them to pack it up. The dealers told Jones tsraight to his face that he was a retard and they started flashing their guns telling him they could easily kill him but he didn't budge. It psyched them out enough they did leave because they didn't want to shoot him up.
Absolutely nuts

>card manipulation

Guess who's making Yugioh real baybeeeeeee

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Hope_Aura
Become the hero America needs.

He'd kill people. If he's not going to go all the way as a vigilante he's just a fag making citizen's arrests in a dumb costume

>powerlisting.wikia.com/special:random
>can generate paint
>can only generate paint of a certain color
>can only generate a limited amount of paint per day
Wow that's fucking shit

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Suicide_Inducement
Not bad.

>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Energy_Matter_Manipulation
>Combination of Energy Manipulation and Matter Manipulation.

So uh... When do I start?

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Underworld_Path

I hope the demons don't get me. Or the good guys, for that matter.

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Transcendent_Ghost_Physiology

I'd just be a really flamboyantly regal JoJo-tier Spawn.
Plus, I'd use my powers to get loads of cash and fuck all of the Ghost bitches.
I'd have Luise von Mecklenburg and Marie Antoinette bouncing on my ecto-dong 24/7.

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I'd read the fuck out of that

Time to release a swarm of nanobots that feed on white adipose tissue and then go rip some as iron man, a pseudo-green lantern and senator Armstrong all wrapped into one.

The nanobots are so I can bend an army to my will at a moments notice.

Probably gonna disable the nukes of everyone who isn't the US. other countries just don't fear us like they used to.

If I'm not emp proof i can rip the nanobots out of someone for new armor because they essentially run on bio fuel and it's not electronic until I make them that way.

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>powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Dimensional_Link

I would help people in any way I can, protect flora and fauna, punish evil and just enjoy my eternity. I'm practically unstoppable.

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Power_Contingency

How does this work if it's your only power?

There was a documentary about real world superheroes and it doesn't work. You'd be walking around in full costume like an idiot looking for crime to fight and cops would regularly tell you to fuck off.

>can't prove your claims because everyone dies anyway
>any demands are going to be irrelevant the day you die of natural causes anyway

powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Probabilistic_Equilibrium

That would be too dangerous to use.

That's funny. I hear often that vigilatism is rather a fascist fantasy.

I'd probably just use it for low level things. Maybe gamble a bit and donate most of my winnings.

just be based hancock

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Yes probably. Imagine dodging the first bullet but getting hit by the second...