/heem/ - Ngannou Edition

News:

Masvidal won by brutal KO
Aldo won
Usman won
Diakiese won
Ngannou won
Jon won
Shev is fighting Jessica Eye soon-ish can't be bovered to look up when exactly
Usman and Ngannou to be in Black Panther 2

Prev Bruv:

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Other urls found in this thread:

youtu.be/uEU8OzCj_Os
twitter.com/roynelsonmma/status/1107798410097233921
mmamania.com/2019/3/19/18272988/conor-mcgregor-puts-joe-rogan-on-blast-call-my-fight-correctly-dont-read-from-script-mma
youtube.com/watch?v=rwiGxmYJTEI
youtube.com/watch?v=vWTLheqBl3k
twitter.com/Limerick1914/status/1108002962436182017
theguardian.com/world/2019/jan/09/brazil-ceara-violence-fortaleza-gangs-bolsonaro
youtube.com/watch?v=KSJQEB3wz-M
instagram.com/p/BvAn9N1g82p/
youtube.com/watch?v=NDEqaAV5ZSc
youtube.com/watch?v=05JfhfQ8chk&t=152s
youtube.com/watch?v=cWrDCc5omGY
youtube.com/watch?v=vNDTN2G8vSE
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

...

max

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Wake up, TJ

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can you imagine getting your ass kicked by a 15 yr old that looked like that?

He looks so smooth

Wake up Marty. That belt belongs to a friend of mine.

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Hey you watch ONE?

Colby?

Not a fan of this guy

Am 173cm 93kg and I could heem every single one in this thread

I would love to see Brendan Schaub get into a violent car wreck

Why would you want to?

yeah i sometimes miss it though

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>third world numbers
I don’t know what that is but I’m six feet, 190lbs of pure American male and I would definitely heem you

Ben is too awkward and cringy

But the question still remains - can you name fighters who can/could become a 3 divisions champion if they tried hard enough.
One guy said no in last thread and I have to agree. The differences between weight classes are too tremendous.
The was a vote for amphetamine DC but I don't think the guy would have any chin

Makes me kek how they have the commercial where there are pinoy kids thanking Eduard Foyolang like he's a guardian angel, repeating his name and shit. Salamat, pogi.

Meet me at the border kid.

Jon Jones could make 185 if he really wanted to

I'm 5'6 and deadlift 225, don't @ me or you get heemed I don't negotiate with terrorists

have you seen his legs?

>don't @ me
Faggot

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yeah i dont even know if poor kids actually even know who he is. i have met a guy who is in the middle east right now and he told me that he is pretty popular there presumably among flips working abroad

max

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this

Apologize!!

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Sorry Black

>MMA
>Real sport

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>obese man fights with destroyed knee for 4 years
one hunny persent

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>we can rebuild him
>we have the technology

>still throws meme kicks
I call BS

one could realistically argue for welterweight max

>News:
>
>Masvidal won by brutal KO
>Aldo won
>Usman won
>Diakiese won
>Ngannou won
>Jon won
>Shev is fighting Jessica Eye soon-ish can't be bovered to look up when exactly
>Usman and Ngannou to be in Black Panther 2


Real news for the patrician class:

Dana is expecting Bork to return in the summer.

It is what it is

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Ah yes the classic schoolyard tactic of piling on the excuses

Lewis wins the rematch

>Caring about Brock
Are you 12?

Yes thank you for requoting the entire post

Prime Lewis heems Stipe

>giving a single shit about an ugly WWE guy
>patrician

mma fighters from new york

woah....

is this cody's first team alpha male?

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Once 165 is added, it'll be piss easy. All you have to do is:
Bodyshot heem Max at 145
Uppercut heem Khabib at 155
Slam heem Askren at 165

>turbocazzes triggered by the #1 draw in the HW division

fuck I meant to google that, my bad

CM Punk wins the rematch

You're the autistic Bong that sucks off Jones and Lesnar

hah

Ryan Hall

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Why does the mere thought of Brock make you so upset? Relax man

based

>*guitar strums*
I hurt myself today

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minowaman the best
super hluk champ

Any news on who TJ is fighting next?

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I'm not upset, you seem bothered that I insulted your bull.

I don't think he would get much success at 185. The difference is too big. And at hw any cardio beast like Velasquez will destroy him.
He is a cut baby. WW has no advantage against other fighters. Moreover it's a leg shaggers' division
I think 165 will shuffle the roasters so much it will be absolutely different thing. Can't predict who will be a champion there

Who would you field for an 8 man UFC Super Hluk Tournament?
It's Openweight so technically anyone can join.

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>cardio beast like Velasquez will destroy him.

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You got any webms? I was thinking of making a few later tonight, he was in some hilarious fights

>cardio beast like Velasquez

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Tony
Max
Gastelum
Khabib
Cyborg
Ngannou
Dominic Cruz
Yoel

>People still burning up Cain as an actual contender in 2019 the year of our lord

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>colby covington will be champion by the end of the year
how does heem feel about this?

Is Usman vacating?

I am obviously talking about old Cain. Sea level or whatever meme word you want to use to describe him. We are talking about hypothetical scenarios after all

Take a deep breath. (You) me when you're ready to talk, champ. :)

I'm talking Jones destroys his knees with oblique kicks and heems him in the third.

>Sea level
What a meme. He got outboxed by Werdum who is a BJJ guy.

Didn't Jacare beat Werdum in the ADCC or something?

This fucking guy irritates me, acts like the sage champ that's had it for years when he robbed MM, but I do like him heemimg TJ

>Sea level Cain
no such thing, you don't get excused for training like a brainlet. Cain was good yes, but always very beatable by other good fighters. heemed by JDS, choked by Werdum, heemed by Ngannou.

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Askren is the problem, not Cejudo.

whats sages sister doing there

How are you going to celebrate when Askren wins the title?

I need /heem/'s unfiltered and objective opinion on this. Is this gay?

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Not until you give your thawlts on this

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He didn't get out boxed. He was stupid enough to clinch with him all the time and got some exhausted he just rushed into his guard and got submitted. I have nothing against Werdum but destroying go forward no matter what bulls is his specialization. He beat fedor the same way
I just want to single out I am talking about his prime state. Old cain and cain that fought ngannou are not even comparable. His lose against JDS was legit but he closed it by beating jds two times after that.

He definitely got outboxed and then DC told him in between rounds to make it a wrestling match and that's when he shot that sloppy double and got guillotined

yoel but he has trouble even making 185 these days

imagine he was in the UFC in his prime

Cejudo's entertaining, I like him.
Honestly if Cejudo were the champ for several years I don't think FLW would be in danger of getting cut

Max is a pillow fisted BUM ! And will get EXPOSED by Poirier AGAIN !!

I wouldn't call it out boxing. It was similar to Klitschko tactics where to connect a few times and then clinch. He just got gassed. He had no other options. Werdum pretty much destroyed him at that point.
True but Yoel is on cuban medicine. It's a pity a fight against borrachinha was dropped just because. I would be a real test of his strength

>Colby and Usman will eventually fight
>60% chance Colby drops the n word into a live mic during the build up
Don’t like where this is going boys, I’m not ready for the race war

Nah you need to go watch the fight again

What did he smell?

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>Colby drops the n word into a live mic during the build up
It's not going to happen polweenie

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microwaves

>robbed MM

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He is entertaining, and to be honest I like him overall. I'm just salty with him over what I already said. Its suffering watching a fighter you like do cringy shit

>True but Yoel is on cuban medicine. It's a pity a fight against borrachinha was dropped just because. I would be a real test of his strength
I think costa is too hittable, and yoel has absolute monster power

The cringe is some of the best shit, its why Tony's my favorite fighter

*stands back up from your takedown*

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You now realize Nick Wright is just basketball Helwani

>both are Jews that went to Syracuse for journalism at the same time and now live in NYC

>athletes and professional broadcasts don't know how these scrawny heebs have accelerated their careers forward, but are forced to interact with them on an equal basis.

>same oddly high male tenor voice

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see how hall clipped him there? imagine someone who hits much harder doing so, and btw is also much harder to approach in general

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This is a 3 (three) time LHW contender Alexander Gustafsson..

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Costa is ducking Elias

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>cringing at Tony
>not salsa dancing along with him for HYPE

You really think Cejudo won? I think he lost the first 3 rounds but had a solid comeback in the last two

Should I listen to Usman on Rogan? I listened to 10 minutes of that british war reporter ysterday and he was boring.

Ariel would never marry a goy though, especially a black one

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I rewatched it and even with werdum's 1-2 - clinch combos he still lost 17 to 24 in significant strikes in first round. He lost second round too but I don't remember stats. It's obvious he was losing until Cain was rocked and werdum started to land consistently.
True. He is young and nutty tho

I don't think you can argue that because fighter X could get beat at a certain weight class, that they couldn't win a belt in that weight class. Obviously prime EPO Cain would put a beating on Jones but that doesn't mean Jones couldn't feasibly win the HW strap somehow

MW would he harder for Jones than HW

Cruz vs Cyborg, who wins?

Oh I don't cringe, I think it's all funny. Tony is a next-level individual

How does theodorou win fights on points? Doesn't getting put on the backfoot the entire fight and not being aggressive take points from you?

Werdum definitely outworked Cain in that fight even before Cain gassed

are you sure we're not seeing prime Yoel right now ? I think the 10+ years of pure wrestling before getting into mma probably did him good

>My dog ate my back

He just tripped. Thats all

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I was using Cain as an archetype that beats Jones. And yes you can easily get a belt even if you not that good by fighting guys who are worse than you, or just a good match up. But putting it like this: "is there a fighter who will perform well in 3 different weight classes" is not better.

Conor got mogged pretty hard by that dog

I'm convinced Theodoroux is catching it from a WME exec

Canelo is finna be heemed by Jacobs.

oh wow you are right. Holy shit

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think about the Anders fight
anders had elias hurt and almost stopped him in the 2nd, and was all of the aggression and octagon control the rest of the fight. Somehow he loses, I don't get it?

Stats I saw probably counted leg strikes but still. Werdum start to land hard only in second round after he connected three times in a row and Cain became wobbly

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Jones could move up and HW champ right now by beating DC, MW he would be doomed because of Yoel/Rob would stuff all his wrestling.
I think winning 2 belts for anyone is possible the third belt would have to be by cherrypicking a superweak champ like GSP did.

>Jacobs
>the guy who lost to GGG
>GGG
>the guy Canelo beat twice

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Memes aside, he lost the first one, it's just impossible to win a decision against Alvarez even if you earn one.

jones could never make middleweight. It's not as if he has a lot of weight to lose right now

Yeah, he lost both fights pretty decisively imo

youtu.be/uEU8OzCj_Os
everyone come ask "how long has GSP been greasing"

>Canelo beat GGG twice
Cawnlelo lawst b

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I said said I don't really believe he would perform so well there. His bones are too narrow and the weight he wouldn't be able to accumulate a lot of muscle weight. Moreover lhw is always the weakest division.
There are robberies in mma but I legit stopped to follow boxing after that fight. Not really the fight but the news that follow about Canelo who signed really big ad contracts a month before the fight. Of course they wouldn't let him lose.

Wake up, Nate.
It's time to wake and bake.

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the boxing model is so fucked
If it was run like the UFC or other big MMA promotions it would be so much better
none of this Fury/Wilder not happening because of stupid promoter issues

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MMA's platform is literally communism incarnate. Boxing is more capitalist friendly.

>UFC fighters can't have their own sponsors
>can't venture into other promotions
>can't sign their own paychecks without the UFC taking some from it
>never get much room to bargain for money

Yeah that sucks but at least you're more likely to get the best fighting each other

I just can't follow boxing because of its model and the judging being that much worse than MMA

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At the end of the day, when you are flushed and brain damaged, will you be happy about your record or the money in your wallet?

I'm not a fighter so that's irrelevant to me, I want to see the best fights

I like Lewis but I'm calling bullshit on this. I had a torn ACL that went undiagnosed for 4 months. In that 4 months my knee slipped out 4 additional times since I was told that I had just strained it. This was just from doing shit like running, jumping, and trying to make sharp cuts off the knee. There is absolutely no way this guy was fighting for FOUR years with a torn ACL in addition to MCL and meniscus. Hell go look at Cains last fight, in the open workout leading up there is the clip that very much looks like his knee slips and he ends the workout since it hurts when it happens. Then in the fight it slipped out again and resulted in him curling up and basically giving up. There is absolutely no way this is true.

Dana White is a fucking saint

nick wright isn't jewish.

firas is a wannabe cult leader creep

*throws jumping switch kick*
*attempts flying knee*

this is so heartwarming
twitter.com/roynelsonmma/status/1107798410097233921

>subbed by a kid
L M A O

>joe rogan btfo
Conor McGregor puts Joe Rogan on blast — Call my fights correctly, don’t read from a script (Video)

mmamania.com/2019/3/19/18272988/conor-mcgregor-puts-joe-rogan-on-blast-call-my-fight-correctly-dont-read-from-script-mma

If you consider any decision by Herb Dean as valid in 2019, just heem urself.

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Ngannou is such a finishlet, I would heem that kid in first.

Usman is really unlikeable. He is dishonerable. He is a whiner. He's a decision artist and he's so fake. What the hell guys. I hate Colby but I prefer him because at least he's playing a character. Usman just pretends to be your average good samaritan but really he's a punk.

Leon edwards is a bitch i wouldve heemed jorge so quickly once he came at me

racist bastard

This is the spammer.

How would Noelle do in MMA (pale girl in black)? Look at that broad frame

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she'd ragdoll khabib

So you just have a webm of mtf teens running in slow motion?

You now remember Brian Ortega

holy shit rashad said weed helps him suffering from CTE

oh yeah that guy

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based and redpilled
cant believe how easily mma fans are taken in by the slightest calculated demonstration of decency

Floyd won a decision against him. But I do think ggg edged him out in the first fight, although it was close.

your average Yea Forumstard

PED-city is getting flushed in his next fight, Toilet style.

>watching Kamaru Usman on the JRE
>Rogan cries within the first 10 minutes

fuck's sake

youtube.com/watch?v=rwiGxmYJTEI

Khabib beats mcgregor 100/100 times. Anyone who says otherwise is a nuthugging casual. P.S. NGANNOU HEEMS JONES WITHIN 2 ROUNDS.

Aren't they afraid of sharks?

joe rogan is a faggot who will be executed by the People's Commissariat come the revolution.

what did tony mean by this?

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fuuuck dude

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He's the only person who has a chance at khabib, it's the only fight to make at LW, pray for EL CUCUYYYYYYYYYYY

He killed them, didnt he

i was thinking that or maybe divorce?

I would bet on divorce. But it's Tony so who knows

youtube.com/watch?v=vWTLheqBl3k

is gooby just drunk or he serious i can't tell

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>But it's Tony so who knows
nothing describes him more than this

>"Conor has sooo much money!"

Why does he jump on every meme like a retard? Joe has far more money than Conor. He has many income streams, and more importantly, he does not have retarded spending habits, unlike Conor.

Conor was never worth nowhere near $100m, and he will fill for bankruptcy within 7 years.

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>mossad doing the ol "im your friend and think alike" trick

sounds like the ramblings of a coke head

God why is every European in this thread such a stupid insufferable faggot?

he actually believes his bullshit and as evidenced by the retards talking to him he has people who agree

the state of those jeans

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here we go again swissfag, you just can't get anything right can you.
>joe rogan has an estimated $25 million net worth
>Conor mcgregor has an estimated $85 million net worth
it may not be 100% correct but it's obvious conor is a lot more wealthier than joe.

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>responding to some cancerous gimmick attentionwhore

>he does not have retarded spending habits, unlike Conor

Joe literally had a piranha tank, and ventures off into the northern wilderness of Idaho to hunt moose every couple of months.

whats wrong with them?

they make the outline of his penis visible

i think he's just drunk
i think its good he's pumping himself up, gotta have a lot of balls to continue after that loss
hopefully he starts training and gets his shit together

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They are extremely tight. They look like leggings a woman would wear.

Yeah, you're using estimates that are pulled out of some random journo's asses.

Heavyweight DC, MAGUMBA both heem jones
Rockhold UD'S jones
ROMERO HEEMS SOUZA
GUSTAFFSON UD'S SMIFF
COLBY BEATS MARTY
Sorry lads it's all true.

imagine wearing this to a UFC

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Could you imagine if Jon just decided to go home invasion serial killer. Terrifying.

Ngannou heems DC

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h7gq3h0893398hqp3489hnpvq3984np89hf98h8hp9q38hqpf983pv8np983nvqp983fhp834hfqp9348hfpTC1TYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!@@@@@@@@

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h7gq3h0893398hqp3489hnpvq3984np89hf98h8hp9q38hqpf983pv8np983nvqp983fhp834hfqp9348hfpTC1TYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!@@@@$$$@#@3

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robbie was not out

MINI
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So what happens if I accidentally sleep the whole day and don't call in sick to work or anything? Just hypothetically haha.

>Weidman and Rockhold move to LHW
>they acquire new chin like Bobby did
>they run through the division, making Jones look like the bum he is
>they have legendary LHW trilogy and retire as GOATs

This is the best timeline.

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>Luke and Weidman
They are beyond redemption.

Probably trying to win back his wife
>Baby, remember the happiest day of our lives when we swore to stand by one another in sickness and in health? I promise to start taking my meds, please un-restraining-order me

prime schaub would heem ngannou

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he's going to get off this skid soon, i'm sure of it....

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he would get shot, atleast in america these fighters wouldn't get very far with everyone owning guns.

trouble my man
should have called your doctor and said how you have diahrea and can't come to them, and that they should open you sick leave

i got drunk once so hard, i woke up, puked yellow orange acid fluid from stomach, called my doctor , said i was feeling sick and im not able to go to her and she should open me sick leave, and got like 3 days
felt depressing and good at the same time

He reminds me a lot of Cejudo, they even talk the same way. Wish he would stop faking, at least Cejudo is beginning to embrace his cringy douchebag personality which ironically makes him more likable

he does. haven't heard anything yet of who dc or magumba are fighting next, brock isn't coming back that fast + he's flushed.

Depends on the job, if its a menial minimum wage job they would have gotten some other bottom feeder to cover your shift.

Nice.

>Lost 90% of the shitposters shitting up multiple boards.
Good riddance.

>jew hating on a muslim
go back to pretending you're innocent and that you actually "own" palestine dirty hooknosed rat.

Good thing this is 4channel

Prime Schaub

Martys champ reign is gonna be very, very short.
On rogan he was going on about how fucked up his body is.
Plus we know he's training under Hooft.

mad because they accent mog you

what a fucking retard lmao

>americans who like the australian accent
cringe

please do

Who would win a fight

Cerrone/Al likely to happen
banger

in a pool or the octagon?

I hope colby btfos him.

al wins that easily. Cerrone is so flushed, he should stop fighting before he becomes a vegetable in 10 years.

Well, Canboy can stop dreaming about a title shot.

>turn on rogan
>it's a debate episode
>nerd #1 cant pull that sucker a fist from his face even after being told twice
>jaime has to come in and do it for him
>proceeds to monologue for 10 minutes straight without letting Joe or the other guy talk
I dont know what his position is but he's a fag and I disagree with him.

What is the debate about?

Heard you got blocked

why are you underrating Cerrone
he might even have the striking edge

Why fat people are fat

does it matter? end result is the same, just help them unfat themselves

octagonal pool

Well, according to modern genetics studies by scientists who are on the forefront of this stuff like Robert Plomin, 70 percent of the variation in weight between individuals is heritable.

well but in order to unfat themselves they have to figure out why; calories in/calories out hurts their feelings

Reddit.

seal drags gooby to deep waters and makes the khabib fight look like fun

Yeah shits fucked m8. can't access any of the NSFW pages. Working on getting a VPN or seeing if any of the ISP's aren't cucked.

>Breaking: Donald Cerrone vs. Al Iaquinta will headline UFC Fight Night on May 4 in Ottawa on ESPN+.”

Let's go boys

Those things'll tear you to shreds

I dont give a shit about what these nerds are talking about I just want them to get heated and argue some more

favourite manifesto?

Hell yeah that card isn't shit now

cowboy went from possibly fighting in one of the biggest ppvs that would finally make him rich to fighting on free tv
he is such a bum

>I eventually grew to hate him after I heard him having sex with my sister. I arrived at the house one day, my mother being at work, and heard the sounds of Samuel plunging his penis into my sister’s vagina through her closed room door, along with my sister’s moans. I stood there and listened to it all. So my sister, who was four years younger than me, managed to lose her virginity before I did.

twitter.com/Limerick1914/status/1108002962436182017

Attached: the cuck tap.webm (1280x720, 2.92M)

>twitter.com/Limerick1914/status/1108002962436182017

kek

>"I came across this Asian guy who was talking to a white girl. The sight of that filled me with rage. I always felt as if white girls thought less of me because I was half-Asian, but then I see this white girl at the party talking to a full-blooded Asian. I never had that kind of attention from a white girl! And white girls are the only girls I’m attracted to, especially the blondes. How could an ugly Asian attract the attention of a white girl, while a beautiful Eurasian like myself never had any attention from them?"

I posted this the other day. Be real with me guys, I am 21, have some boxing experience, no grappling experience, am kinda out of shape, 5'11" 205 pounds. If I wanted to go pro, what do I need to do? I am not worried about the odds of me making it, I just want to know what I need to do and what I should be doing. If I was fighting, it would most likely be at light heavyweight or heavyweight (stocky build). I am in the boxing club at my uni but will obviously need to pursue more training, I was thinking of picking up kickboxing and wrestling. What do you guys think?

ROW ROW FIGHT THE POWA

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backup thread:
------------------
nigger nigger desu desu

fucking based

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So many fighters tap, why do they make it a big deal when Conor does it? When a submission is locked, its usually going to be a finish.

>black don't crack

because he talks about people dying in the octagon giving up when they get hit by him

slowly but surely all the champs will be wrestle fucks

What state are you in?

just defend the takedown bro

easy work for the realtor from long island

Just do the barboza knee. Its not hard.

someone post the whittaker shop of that tyler tweet

which female fighter has the best body

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for me it's Tiffany Van Soest

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>Laquinta Inn & Suites beating New ™ Cowboy

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Lol just shoot him how's that scary? Don't fall for the "baddest man" mma meme, guns trump all skill and size advantages.

if it's against the law to post on Yea Forums when you're "free" then there is no reason not to be in prison

Of course I can imagine it, I jerk off to it don't I

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what do you think rich piana is doing right now

23 hr arm workout in heaven

Because he acts like he's too good to defecate in his pants after losing consciousness, so he taps rather than taking than chance. If you ask me you can only be considered the best if you fight every fight with the very real possibility of pinching a loaf should you be rendered unconscious.

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Imagine her crushing your head in between those thighs

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Dana is the based slave master. Anyone who signs up to work for him is a cuck.

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why was cro cop so bad in the ufc

Schaub is just that good

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Because UFC wasn't a fixed fights theater at that point?

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crazy to think this guy can heem pretty much everyone on earth...

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What if he has a gun too?

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>pretty much
*literally

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Who is your boy in each division?

Stipe
Marreta
Bobby
Wonderboy
Ferg
Max
Aljo
Figueredo

Age, injuries, hadn't had time to adapt to the cage & new rules yet. The Cro Cop that beat Nelson is better than the one from his second shitty run

I'm immune to bullets
I win by decision 4th rd

I wonder when the UFC will change its rule set to combat this.
>get fookin jacked and train wrestling
>cut massive amounts of water weight
>wrestlefuck your opponent into oblivion with weight advantage
It's a meta pretty much anyone can tap into, some champs do different shit with their physical gifts like Jones with his retarded reach though.

>you now remember Sean “The Muscle Shark” Sherk

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>it's baby food, not roids

>I started watching MMA in 2018: starter pack

Schaub unironically has a good MMA resume

It's basically already a reality my man. Whittaker and Max are the only real fighters left.

Pour moi, c'est Chrissy Blair

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>one has CTE
>one is made of glass and always pulls out

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>I started watching mma in 2018: the novices second edition

>meta
Fucking cringe. Why are you redditniggers so obsessed with this meaningless buzzword?

Askren is the top draw right now in the UFC that’s a fact

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based

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>“I can’t help but laugh when I see stuff like this,” Sylvia wrote on Twitter. “When Frank Shamrock, Jens Pulver, and myself are all out here like WTF, really?”

>“Everyone knows Dana is a dick,” Sylvia said. “UFC HOF is a popularity contest on who kisses Dana’s ass and is a ‘yes sir’ to him. I never took his shit and never will. If I could get him in a gym with me I would slap his teeth down his throat. For me and all the other fighters.”

Is Timmy right, lads?

For me its Rose

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He would unironically beat Khabib

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which fight has the best process?

Just an easy word to throw out to describe the most efficient way to do something my guy

B-but Forest was my favorite fighter!

Who has pleased the most BBC. Rose or Holly?

Jesus fucking christ dude chill out with the tacos and tortas
*Achilles hooks you*

dana living in his head rent free

Taking a last minute fight and not taking the camp seriously

Without googling, tell me the main event of UFC 47. Otherwise you're a cazzie

>destroys your mental health

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Just tell the kickboxers to stand up when they taken down. Or go watch kickboxing.

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the natty GOAT

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14 year old boy shows up for PE class

if my tits were that small i'd be angry too

rose may have only been with guys before pat and only with pat since they started dating

holly is going all out now if she wasn't already when she was with jef

Gustafsson

Perhaps, in the championship rounds when his pressure turns up. He's not going to be submitted or KO'd by Khabib but he'd only have whatever time he can stay on his feet to win it.

rose has to go from playing a piano in church with her mom to traveling to brazil and headlining a card can she do it or will she tom breese it?

Imagine being so soft you get PTSD from goobert throwing a dolly at your bus

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Costa is an easy fight for Yoel, Jacare 2 is way scarier for him

jfc I think it's fairly obvious that pat barry likes to fuck little boys

the Brazilian fans are going to destroy her

I wanna Michael Jackson that teenage boy!!

>Costa is an easy fight for Yoel

smugpepe.jpg

unironically joanna should be ranked above rose p4p

Oh one hunnerd percent Jacare is an absolute Munster my guy. Whatelsey’got?

She thought it was the ocean, it's just the pool

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theguardian.com/world/2019/jan/09/brazil-ceara-violence-fortaleza-gangs-bolsonaro

Costa fucking sucks and will lose as soon as he fights a non-can

>falling for another hype train bum because he has le undefeated record

>oh yea rose you should totally shave your head, it'll be great for mma

>Wake up Rose, it's all over.
youtube.com/watch?v=KSJQEB3wz-M

she literally doesnt do anything "for mma" anyway

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>no claudia vs andrage ultimate surrender
it's not fair

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>be attractive, energetic and charismatic
>wins title and immediately goes goes stoic, low-energy and silent

How much $$ is she missing out on? Her title is about to be heem'd away and she did nothing to market herself. Will she blame the UFC when she reaches total irrelevance?

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>she

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Don’t care about Sylvia but my boy Jens should be in there. Also Dana is a dick

instagram.com/p/BvAn9N1g82p/
rose's brother just lost to that guy

based and redpilled

costa is getting flushed

Jens streams on twitch now

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rose has ptsd from the trolley attack

>penne

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She spiralled into mental illness and goofed herself into literally who status despite being champ
Imagine being a pretty woman and CHAMP and still being unknown
JUST

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based jens

Rose is wholesome. She has a husband and will soon seek bigger things. IE, being a mother. For a female, there is no greater achievement.

>literally same physique as his sister
uhhh wh*tebois?

what are some tuneup fights for Till?

except Ross Pearson

What a handsome young man

Maybe he wants her to look like a mini version of himself

about 5 women ever in mma have been in the position she's in to make money. maybe she's too fucked up mentally. she's only in her 20s she'll have to be a wagecuck for the rest of her life

pat is an unemployed drug addict

>comes back from nowhere
>beats McGregor again
>beats Beeb for the title
>immediately vacates the belt and retires
>heem seething
>LW in shambles
>Dana on the brink of death
Best timeline

Okay.

Of anyone currently fighting it would have to be max. If edgar could somehow win the fw title, Perhaps drop to BW and try his hand there.

I'm certain Frankie could make BW.

Rose is unironically sub 70 IQ, a legal retard

And you’re british so who’s off worse?

>Nate Diaz beating Khabib

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No he wouldn’t

Depends on how many rounds will they fight. I am rooting for Jacare.

Okay.

Of anyone currently fighting it would have to be max. If edgar could somehow win the fw title, Perhaps drop to BW and try his hand there.


I'm certain Frankie could make BW.

Thawts?

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>she did nothing to market herself
dana decides who gets the marketing push. you think ronda rousey could convince everyone all on her own that she could box when all she did was a judo move and arm bar

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amanda nunes if they let her use adderall to weight cut to 125

how many times did uriah hall hit him?
Also, hall took him down, imagine what a bigger better wrestler will do to him. One that is also much faster, has a better chin and hits harder too

women sitting like this is unbelievably hot

joanna worked as hard as anyone to promote herself and did a good job especially considering she is ugly as fuck

I will never understand people's obsession with shaub
She is build like Shrek. She will get into a coma if you hit her at 125

how did dana not get me too'd

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good chin, great bjj, decent boxing, experienced and in his prime. the meme that nate is a stoner can is funny but not accurate

Stipe
Jones
Chris
Thompson
Gaethje
Max
TJ
Joe B
Pena
Modafferi
Joanna

we just have to wait

Ugly bitches keep secrets

i dare you to insult the russian government

she already beat shitstinko twice in many ways she is the 3 division champ plus she would flush anyone at 155 pounds outside of the poofc

Hunt
Don’t care
Machida
Lawler
Tony
Cruz
Gucci
Nunes
Don’t care
Andrade

tatiana suarez is a 3 division champ, valentina when she moves down to 115 and then back up to 135 is a 3 division champ, jessica andrade is a 3 division champ no problem wmma is the future

that’s because in the women’s divisions, there are typically about two good fighters per weight class and everyone else is bums

conor in miami during spring break what a fucking dork

Jacare's got a bunch of absolute titles in BJJ, against the right opponents he could snag titles at LHW & HW

Vitor Belfort
Vitor Belfort
Vitor Belfort
Conor McGregor
Conor McGregor
Conor McGregor
TJ Dillashaw
TJ Dillashaw

Stipe
Jones
Silva
Colby
Tony
Aldo (would say Holloway but he isn’t currently at featherweight
Cejudo soon
Cejudo

JDS
Smif
Jacare/Bobert
Robbie
Tony
Max
I don't really understand how beating the bullet helps to gain or cut weight. At 155 there will be even more roided monsters than her
Putin is a muzzie loving cuck btw

henry cejudo is an A+ level athlete who cuts from 150 something pounds he will easily be a 3 division champion

Why wouldnt you admire a successful comedian, entrepreneur, podcast mogul, UFC legend, elite athlete, fashion guru, gourmet food connoisseur and beast of a dad?
Schaub should be a role model for everyone on /heem/

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>Putin is a muzzie loving cuck btw
absolutely based and anticensorpilled

Alex Caceres

I'm picking Pettis to win by a split decision

Man that cover is so cringe in retrospect

I really hope Lawler gets the rematch and wins.

Prime Honda heems Mayweather hunnie persent b

They must still be compiling evidence for his docket. I mean the Warner Bros president was metoo'd just yesterday so its an ongoing thing I assume.

Askren would sooner retire than take that fight

What was your response when Lyoto heemed Rashad?

I always thought that to be a comedian you need to be funny but he and Joe proved me wrong. I respect his success tho.
He only does worse for them. They get genocided in prisons here because of it
Askren won't fight him again

Haven't showered in days unironically

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I really don't, and it's not happening

Does that make her more or less attractive
youtube.com/watch?v=NDEqaAV5ZSc

You haven't even see his standup, dont be a hater b

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>Masvidal won by brutal KO
But did he really?

>not taking tubs

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>sambo bear vs jiu jitsu chimpanzee
who wins?

Arlovski or Cain (although they're both over-the-hill)
Johnny Walker (formerly Machida, but moved to MW)
Anderson
Askren
Iaquinta
Korean Zombie
Dominick Cruz
Horiguchi

because he gave up his back so he could be submitted on purpose rather than get knocked out/TKO'd, its smart on his part, but goes against things hes said in the past
he did the same against diaz

DC (lowkey JDS and Stipe)
Santos (low key johnny walker and jimi)
Yoel
Robbie (low key colby and ben)
Tony (low key lee, al, cowboy)
Max (low key aldo, elkins, kattar)
Dvalishvili (low key cody, lineker)
Cejudo

What if that had been a shitbull instead?

JDS
Jones
Mousasi
Lawler
Al
Aldo
Moraes

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Yes, he was badly öyt

i only have one

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Why did aldo let that happen?

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I've seen some old his stuff. Didn't like it

Woah he looks just like Sergio therrt

2bh a bit of eye gouging from bear. Gonna have to give it to dog. Bear was probably doping too, look at his trics. Not to mention his fanbase sucks. Bear being a cheating animal as usual
Dog definitely was the better fighter here

based and showtimepilled

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>Officer McCarthy apprehending armed and dangerous brazilian gunman

That's your problem b, you need to see his recent shit, it's easily on the mount Rushmore of comedy

Reminder that his Showtime special drops soon, dont forget to subscribe to them

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>Me vs Anders...

He ain't called the fastest rising calmedian on the planet for nothing my man.

I will unironically watch some of his shit tommorow

Based

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Wtf
I was walking down the street and Ben Askren ran out of nowhere and beat my ass and told me to tell /heem/ to be sure to always bet on him, every match will be a KO in r1 and he will be the champ by 2020
He also said to cap this

You think Weedman is in the heemcord?

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I would probably get banned for posting mine.

Is Pettis just a madlad or does he know something that we don’t? Seriously why did he do this?

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Pettis knows

I think you'd be surprised

tony got a new tattoo

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cringe.
I hope that bum never fights again

>that picture perfect head and arm throw

Imagine how fucking fragile "her" friends are. You could probably run through them all in less than 2 weeks.

Champ Shit Only

Armand?

you may not like it but this is what peak modern science is capable of

his son

youtube.com/watch?v=05JfhfQ8chk&t=152s

heemy Soprano is cucking over Christchurch lol

Like reading a tombstone ...

He is 100% going to Chris Benoit his family and then he is going to Chris Benoit himself. Someone screengrab this, as it is absolute fact. The whole situation will be Chris Benoitesque.

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How is this assisting with the chip removal?

Who?

I have no striking experience. Why does schaub revert to what looks like an old lady with parkinsons after he throws punches, is this a common technique?

he's flushed bros

They almost got me too

This is the one

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Valerie Loureda

The REEM
Walker
Santos
Curly Headed FUCK
Sperg
Max
Manlets don't count.

He'd be a shitty serial killer if he just shot people, but yeah that would definitely be effective.

LET ME BANG BRO

I'm gutted for Till. He's a good lad, he didn't deserve this.

>That meme Krazy Horse fight on the porn website was almost an entire year ago

man that makes me feel bad

You disliking him made me like him :^)

DC
Johnny Walker (yes I'm a bandwagoner fuck you)
Yoel
Askren (see above)
Max
Nathaniel Wood
Pantoja

>Colby but I prefer him because at least he's playing a character
>character

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>Hunt
he's gone kiddo

hes a bad lad actually

I am finna heem myself with a lot of pills

Till is still going to be the greatest fighter of all time one day. He’s in his early twenties, guys, give him a break.

After he is brutally KO’d a hundred more times he will just be reaching his prime.

we need you on /heem/ lad

reminder that you cant do it with benzos and aspirines

you need opiates motherfucker

>heeming yourself
>missing out on future spicy fights
it's the only reason i'm still alive

how

that guy the other day explained why you shouldn't, also if you were going to you would have done it when u posted this the other day

To Bellator, hopefully. Even at this stage he is still my boy and could still heem every here

she paid a lot for those, if she wants to show them off she's earned it

We're reaching levels of CTE we've never seen before.

I am finna boutta tell you not to do that

Why heem yourself without heeming some pedos first?

What did he mean by this?

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yikes and cringepilled

calderwood is underrated

youtube.com/watch?v=cWrDCc5omGY

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>rating wmma

can't argue with that my friend

Is that camel fucker a meme coach?

she's unironically the replacement title challenger for shitcuckold vs. jessica brown eye

she's getting old, poor wee lass

she's terrible everywhere. it's incredible how shit of a striker she is considering she's been training half her life. F level "athlete"

why is britain so okay with pedophilia?

Bout to go to KFC to show my support

it seems to be a play on the fact that he's eating the food of gastelum's people

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Mcgregor finally talks about Khabib fight...thawlts?


youtube.com/watch?v=vWTLheqBl3k


>I wasn't dropped! He almost dropped me, I got back up on my feet
kek

semantics don't sound tough

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Pls don’t

a lot of mental gymnastic and trying hard to cope right there

live stream it

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He just blacked a latina and she picked him up something from the local mexican restaurant. Pretty based if you ask me.

*heems you before you get the chance*
Glad I could do my part keeping you safe

Why did Allah make Khabib so strong?

Tarrant knew why

Pretty much all of the "name" gyms are know for having a couple really good fighters and not much else. Par for the course

Lads I think I'm allergic to moisturiser

Whittaker beats Usman

Let the Bong have the next thread he needs it.

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youtube.com/watch?v=vNDTN2G8vSE

Thoughts?

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Strong leg game. I will wife her right now.

hehe so funny. isn't it like 2 am there you pathetic fuck, go contain your autism in the shitcord

he heems your favourite

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I invented toilet till

>5'4 144 pounds

get a job

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show butt hole

I beg to differ

i can see your hairy ass reflecting off the scale

I invented Ben Bidet Askren

his martial art is literally Chun C U C K Do

not me, seek employment

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NEW NEW NEW

I invented Lithuania

Watch macdonald vs Díaz

he got smoked by inferior wrestlers like Bendo and RDA. Everyone knows the Diaz Bros greatest weaknesses are leg kicks and wrestling.

The only chance Nate has if Khabib gasses by the third round. Khabib's gas tank is questionable and Nate has an insane cardio and pace in late rounds

In 50 years the use of gloves in mma will be seen as barbaric due to the undue CTE it has facilitated.

>40 posts early
Water we dune here?

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Tim Kennedy would heem khabeb

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>US Special Ops guy gets heemed by Cuban senior citizen

Coked up and drunk.
You can hear it in his voice - the surging of stimulant drugs affecting his speech patterns and breathing control. His flushed red face, a sign of alcohol intake.

She talks like a valium-head

he is that one kid in school who would actually believe his own bullshit.

BREAKING NEWS: THIS JUST IN TJ POPPED FOR HIS LAST FIGHT AND VACATED HIS BELT VIA INSTAGRAM.

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For sure Holly fucked Jon Jones