"Help, I can't swim!"

>"Help, I can't swim!"
>drowns
>floats up

So if corpses float anyway, why do they all drown?

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Beats me bio ology is weird

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people panic when drowning and can't tread water when they're panicking
you should be able to lie on your back and float with minimal effort unless you're a manlet/thin

Have sex

so theoriticly if i were to smoke a fuckton of weed i would be able to swim without any prectice?

Gases are released which causes the body to float

I preemptively release those gasses and braaap myself back to surface.

you'd probably just drown while high
why do minorities refuse to learn how to swim

It occured to me that humans are capeable of amazing things but the moment we panic, we really turn to utter shit. Like everything falls apart immediately. We trample people, we hyperventilate, we drown despite being able to swim. It's so bad that non-trained people are told not to come to the help of someone drowning because they'll just grab onto them and drag them down into the water with them, killing themselves and the rescuer. Panic mode is really a terrible fucking flaw in our biology that seems to do more harm than good.

>dude weed
No, you'd just drown you fucking retarded degenerate.
Actually do us a favour and try it out yourself.

but id be relaxed tho so no panick

I felt this when I was replacing the tile on the roof last week, it was the easiest task ever but because it was 70 feet in the air I was shaking like a motherfucker and almost tripped on the ladder.

The human body is retarded.

It's not a flaw. You're just retarded.

Transhumanism into robotic chassis is the only way for our species to survive.

I said the negatives of its evolutionary function outweight the benefits. We're not exactly running from tigers or rhinos anymore, and even if we were, I don't see how panicking would help us, as the body is perfectly capeable of sending out adrenaline without making us panic.
Panic is literally just loss of control and nothing else, and I don't see any evolutionary benefit to that whatsoever, now that I think about it.

>Ey I'm DROWNING here!

>We're not exactly running from tigers or rhinos anymore
This fucking tired plebbit cliche is so retarded. Just because the most physical thing you’ve ever done was your bottom surgery doesn’t mean other people have no use for the hundreds of adaptations we have evolved related to predation.

I'm talking to wall, aren't I

>when you're drowning your body sinks but when you die it magically floats again because physics
>I HECKING LOVE SCIENCE

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For me, I find it retarded how cooking food suddenly fucked with our jaws and teeth. You mean to tell me my body has code to make me develop exactly 36 teeth but can’t grow them the right size and in the right place if I cook a little broccoli?

Pathetic.

Do people not realize if you just lie on your back and relax your head will float above water and you can stay afloat indefinitely without expending an ounce of effort (unless you're a bodybuilder)? You don't even need to know how to tread water

Teeth were a fucking mistake anyway. Why the fuck do they need to be connected to nerves in the first place. Why the fuck does it need all that complex enamel shit that rots away if it so much looks at sugar? Why the FUCK do they hurt so goddamn much when they're damage?
Why couldn't our body just jut out some fucking un-feeling bone tissue that allows us to grind mercilessly whatever she we came across?
>nah fuck that, let's make teeth, the stuff you use to grind shit on a daily basis, fragile and painful, fuck you buddy

>be fully furcoated giga primate sleeping in the open snow
>invent fire
>suddenly become le vulnerable naked man who needs clothing and shelter

Fire was a mistake.

Fantastic, now you're lying back first on water. Now what, genius? Wait to magically appear on land?

>I don't see any evolutionary benefit to that whatsoever
we didn't evolve to be "better humans" but to survive. An "override everything and flee" behavior has obvious benefit to anything unable to think it's way out of danger. Traits with an adaptive advantage remain after they are no longer advantageous until they become so maladaptive that they die out. Like other now vestigial behaviors/adaptations (feinting, the appendix), panic helped our ancestors survive but might be maladaptive under current pressures.

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>what is the current

How many fucking stories is your your house? I've climbed utility poles shorter than that.

If you're in a current you're fucked either way.

>pain exists to tell you where something is wrong
bitch I can see my fucking bone I know exactly where the problem is but I cant do anything about it now stop fucking hurting like a motherfucker holy shit

Your bite your tongue off if your teeth had no feeling

Wait, that makes no sense. You'd still feel the pain in your tongue.

>minorities
you mean whites?

Yeah, it's more likely that you'd grind away whatever was there instead of teeth. The human jaw is pretty damn strong.

why did humans not evolve to have infinite teeth like sharks?

It was a big three story barn.

Yeah I'm telling you some people are really fucking stupid when it comes to water, I couldn't believe it myself. It's not even about intelligence sometimes, some people really do have to learn this shit, to not punch and fight the water like it was an attacker. I saw a french scientist I lived with shock himself twice on the same open wire because he was just, I don't know, curious about it the second time and wanted to check it was live? People do this shit man it's incredible

for you

No, he means shitskins

Why precisely do black people not know how to swim

Pepes can't drown, they're froggies.

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too preoccupied trying to steal the water

I think it's a cultural thing where they live in cities and fuck around their neighborhood instead of having their parents take them to a pool
therefore most never learn how to swim

if they're released, it means the gasses already exist in the body

>they live in cities and fuck around their neighborhood instead of having their parents take them to a pool
Which is crazy because every time I go...!

True.
Treading water in a storm/big waves is a lot harder and much more exhausting though.
Especially if you get the wind knocked out of you by one of them.

Bump

thats another funny one
>be hit have *wind knocked out of you cant breethe for shit*
>be hit *barely feel it*

wonder why sometimes the wind gets knocked out

>Why precisely do black people not know how to swim
Whenever they go in the pool someone yells "turd!" and a guy with a big net comes and scoops them out. So they can't learn.

i dont get it

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Bump

since I guess this thread is allowed somebody should post that video where a black guy dived into dirty water to retrieve a piece of driftwood to carve it into art, just to remember he couldn't swim and started drowning
another random guy who COULD swim goes out to save him and the black guy drowns him and then dies too, it happens in like a single minute

>current pulls you out to sea
>get eaten by a fleet of great white sharks

>a fleet of sharks
bros... they have fleets now?

dey fleet now?

souls are real and have weight. when the person die their soul leaves their body and its light enough to float to the top

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sharks don't eat humans

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>"I can't breathe"
>surrounded by air
???

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The correct term is flock, not fleet. You're welcome, ESL-kun.

Denser bones makes them less buoyant