Please be a good film with terrible marketing

Please be a good film with terrible marketing.

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Nah, sorry. Its Disney. Shits completely fucked.

THE BOY IS INSANELY CUTE

It looks like a massive CGI clusterfuck, and not in the good Michael Bay kinda way. Also reddit already hates it because it apparently doesn't follow the source material in the slightest, so Disney already fucked themselves out of the normie audience.

DOA my man. Better to just not watch and wait for the next childhood work to get fucked up.

>Its Disney.
Everything is Disney. Heck, Disney have owned the rights to Clive Barker's Abarat books since 2000. Wonder how they'll handle the eventual Disney+ adaptation.

Wasn't this a fairly popular teen book or something?

This movie is way too late.

why isn't holly brown?
the one case when they have an awesome brown female character and they make her white

Please tell me this isn't true. They can't soil Abarat

Apparently Disney executives saw Barker's paintings and paid him 8 million for the book rights.

I have some bad news

Pretty funny they blacked the bodyguard but bleach the love interest.

It's not going to be good. I'm just happy this kinda shit isn't and probably will never happen to The Seventh Tower because almost nobody remembers it.

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In order to think like a producer, there are a couple necessary steps:
1. Pretend you've just lost 30 IQ points (it doesn't matter what your IQ actually is, knocking off 30 points will put you safely in Producer range)
2. After dropping 30 IQ points, pretend that you now have to anticipate the tastes of a movie-going audience you think is even dumber than you.
3. Pretend that there is no such thing as an original idea. Not just an idea in its totality, but no such thing as an original visual, character, location, or tone. Everything needs to be like something else that already exists.
4. Operate under the assumption that if your movie does not feature at least one prominent non-white role, your movie will be a disaster.

Once you've taken those four prerequisite intellectual steps, you can start taking stabs at why Hollywood is so fucking stupid. You rightly ask why, when finally being given the chance to faithfully adapt a brown character, the filmmakers chose not to in this case. Putting on my Producer hat, I imagine the thought process going something like this:
>Uhhhhh okay so this movie is about like fairies right
>Oh, the fairy character is brown? Uh...well, when most people think of fairies, they probably think of Tinkerbell, and she's not brown, she's white
>Therefore, people will think a brown fairy is weird, so we can't have that
>But we need a minority role and the only major character left is the burly manservant, so obviously we'll make him black
Notice that despite the idea that the supposed importance of representation on-screen is to counter racism, the casting of the physically imposing manservant as black is racial stereotyping at its finest. This is because the drive for diversity is literally mindless: any actually racially conscious human being would point out why this casting is unwise, but all the producer understands is that they need a non-white role, and that's the only major role left.

>Oy vey Immanuel, look at wat dis goy jus posted on da Yea Forums

>why isn't holly brown?
Because the director asked the author if it would be okay to mix up the character races as he felt fit, and the author said okay.

>fantasy franchise
Uhhhh, 2006 called? They want their strategy back.

based and i agree desu

fucking hell

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What a bewildering non-answer
He asked why Holly wasn't brown and all you said was that the director decided that she wasn't going to be, which didn't answer his question at all

I think they miscasted Artemis. He is supposed to be thin and pale. In the book he unnerves people with his looks and towering intelligence. This childish grin on the poster is very unlike Artemis. In the books he is don't express himself that way.

>He asked why Holly wasn't brown and all you said was that the director decided that she wasn't going to be, which didn't answer his question at all
The answer is literally "The director decided to cast whichever actor/actress took his fancy". If he'd liked some black Irish kid enough as Artemis he might have cast him. He liked the Holly actress, so she got cast.

I would call that more of a smirk that a grin, personally.

Again, what if it turns out to be good.

5 star post

>The movie did add one thing that I wish I could add to the book … I can’t tell you exactly how, but they added a ticking clock element to the siege which makes it far more exciting. There were many other changes such as gender switches, plot twists, and backstory which I am one hundred percent behind.
>The was one moment in particular that I was not sure how the effects people would approach it. This was when the flatulent dwarf almost explodes with trapped wind. All I can say is that they did not hold back and the results are hilarious.
>Eoin Colfer

All of this doesn't matter when the Fowl and Butler were miscasted and the boy have fucking different character. Also
>shoving 2-3 books in one movie

The point is that the film may actually be closer to the books than people realize. If they've got Mulch explosively farting, what else is in the movie? I get the feeling the trailers aren't showing a lot of stuff that they'd be very wise to show. The trailers feel aimed at the wrong people.

I haven't read them in a while and I'm not sure if I even finished the series but I remember Fowl being a bit of a little shitheel that in time grows into a proper hero in about book 3 or so but he gets mindwiped back to shitheel status. Is my mind going or did that happen?