/heem/ Father of Hap edition

Hap:

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streamable.com/blptu5
youtube.com/watch?v=ppLe93RCL-8&ab_channel=GrandSumoBreakdown
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

>mom i posted it again

i'll post it till you stop seething about black babies you racist chud

haphaphaphaphaphap

Feels bad man

*hapsplodes*

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S

tfw basically same age as Gooby, Gaethje, Khabib, Dustbin, Oliveira

end of an era b

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that aint samurai dawg

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>cuckin all 3 of you

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how am i just now hearing about fury fighting today and its the day of the fight? wtf?

boxings dead. if jake paul was fighting you'd know about it

you guys seeing this boxing exhibition? They brought out a fat guy from the audience to fight a boxer

Bros I just dropped the biggest Schaub of my life. Didn't even feel like a record breaker but it was. At least 2 lbs. AT LEAST it was 2 parts and just 1 was about the size of an Asian woman's forearm with a fist sized mass at the end. Going to nap now

>me get to class late (this okay, i clean up after and a wagie of the gym)
>drill and get first rolls with no problems
>roll with girl
>play from kesa gitame (let her move but maintain the position, i like that spot sue me)
>finish roll she gets of the mat with sad dumb lady face
>roll with her boyfriend
>he catches an armbar and goes 100 crank at the jump
>i escape but my elbow popped
>i get mad and start aggressively going for wristlocks and finger breaks ;) after i can opener him real good
>he catches me in a straight ankle and i feel him go for a 100 crank again
>start hitting him in the body like angry ape with thuds loud enough to hear over the generic nigger pop music
>purple belt pulls me off
>big drama show with lots of yelling, his girl crying
>me: "fuck you get your gloves on"
>him:"....HITTING...ON MY GIRL FOOL" or something like that
>me:"i didn't touch your girl dawg" This is a lie i had just held her down in a lazy kesa gitame
>whole exchange from the monkey mauling to the seperation lasts only a few seconds
>coach basically says i instigated it by not "knowing who i was rolling with"
>me angry and trying not to cry since i didn't get to really explain what happen, give coach back his key, say I'm out
>coach gets angry and has a screaming match with me about dumbshit
>end with me riding my back away while a crazy gi in sweaty pajamas is yelling at me about smoking weed
lmao tldr, me a spergy 4 stripe whitbelt that works at the gym for the past 4 years and going to class for 5, had an aggressive roll with a bluebelt who thought i did something to his frumpy girlfriend and tried to hurt and went autistic monkey rage on his as till we got separated. I only hit him in the body. I should have kicked his head or and punch him in his mouth i think
why did i do it?

all i wanted was sniff a womanon butt, is that to much to ask? how gruesome can life be? what a shitty script

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ohhhh stop the fight
another ko for his record woooow

kinda lol, and the just randomly stopped it because even they got bored of it

streamable.com/blptu5

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didn't read a word to be honest with you my man

Sniff a guys ass then

Reminder
MMA Guru 2022 Prediction Records:

Total Bout Record: 100-47 (68%; 2021-64%)
All Main Events: 10-2
All Male Bouts: 84-37
All Female Bouts: 16-10
Upset Picks: 15-13
Last Card: 10-3

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just sexy max bro, you can do it. Find the wife of your dreams dawg and make as many babies as you can raise. Also have as many wives as you can support alhamdulillah

This is why I’m a boxing gym kinda guy.

I’d much prefer felons than literally faggots in my dojo

Mma guru is based and a certified /ourguy/

it's okay i still appreciate YOU user, lets fucking go and achieve baby

>A hurricane blew my mothers roof off when she was giving birth to me

I don't believe him

AMAZING ILL FLIP A FUKIN COIN

i have to think about this. tnx for advice

I am coming to suck your dick
t.faggot boxer

Nigga built like a muscular frog

Did it tear your ass? I Did one once that tore my ass.

seriously....whats the deal with belal? is it comedy or simply trolling? whats his endgame?

>gayjitsu
>being surprised that everyone is insecure retards
if that were me I would've shot them if they were on me like they were with you at the end..also
>he tries to armbar me
>I BLACKSPLODE up into a scramble and slam him on his head killing him instantaneously
t.wrestler

Just do it b
The worst thing that can happen is that you're back at waiting for a girls ass

me too but im afraid that if it smells bad itll ruin the fantasy

you guys actually go to gyms?

lol

i wish i would have thought about that instead of trying to turn his ribs and sternum into dust

fat

>A notorious group-sex practitioner, Oliveira is reported to have participated in more than 50 orgies. [51][52]
whaaat?

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What do you do? I want to fight in the ufc and make thinly veiled racist remarks and heem memes, how can i do that without going to gyms?

a muslim who is american enough that the hoards of americans dont defend him and gaslight you into thinking he isnt a bum unironically

I want to marry Roxanne Modaferri

Bros, theyre saying tyson fury moves like a welterweight

but dillian whyte only needs to land once

you couldnt make me coom. back up doot before you get hurt feelings.

you should've blacksploded on her bf from the start, since you should already know he's gonna try to show off to her from the get go. It was your fault for not predicting his intentions. You should've taken his back and buck broke him by riding him for the duration of the roll

bro i suck your dick so good you'd coom in the first, don't mes wit me cuh i got the DSL on the real no cap

>Oliveira is nicknamed "Cowboy" due to formerly being a rodeo bullrider.[5]
>Oliveira has ten children from various relationships.[73]
>On Christmas Eve in 2018, while getting gasoline for his mother’s car in Tres Rios, Brazil, a grenade was thrown toward his direction after he noticed several family members in an altercation with heavily armed thugs

Sleep to recover, Kang.

I knew fuck shit was on the prowl, I was just wanting to play ignorant that day playa, thank you for the love :*

the only gym drama ive ever seen is some guy passing out and hitting his head while trying to squat and then being mad they called for an ambulance because he couldnt afford it

Do you think Hap and Ian Garry meet in some special club for men who raise adoptive black children?

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not a real one i guess b

You already got btfo when we talked about this yesterday

just dont get in lmao like adios yall

murrica

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>they called for an ambulance but he couldnt afford it

Don’t get in and walk away?

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>flag
Oh, OP...

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All my UFC fantasies involve dog whistling heem. The only thing I worry about is getting too popular and normies figure out what I'm references. Of course there's some here but the average redditor has no idea this place exists. Its one of the only reasons I keep coming back here.

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Tysoi Fury is a -9999 favorite over some fat black slow piece of shit or instead of watching that clown show you can watch UFC with the former champ and one of the few ever Sheemers to ever exist, Jessica Bate Estaca Andrade takes on surging prospect Lemos in a clash of countrywomen for 5 rounds for the hearts of Brazilians and MMA fans around the world. And thats just the main event. Boxing cards have nothing else worth watching, with the UFC, every fight from the first prelim to the main event has a chance to be an absolute barn burner. I know what I'll be watching this evening.

Tyson Fury moves like a middleweight but Dillian Whyte only needs one

>Tysoi Fury is a -9999 favorite over some fat black slow piece of shit
Yep, that’s the formula. See them wilder fights? Sheesh

for me it would be winning the big fight and then after D.C asks me to talk about the KO finish I would wait till he falls and then say "heem sleepy"

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sorry sir when i make it i plan on screaming heem like native american warrior as i throw the killing shot and using it a sonic weapon in my opponents ear. You will have the eyes of the normies on you my proud one

lmao

They aren't gonna overlap at all b. Im watching both. I'm just waiting for the main event so I can bust into /box/ and dab on their general with my big heemin dick.

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ltos of practice from dana pissing in her mouth

no i didn't, you're a fag.

youtube.com/watch?v=ppLe93RCL-8&ab_channel=GrandSumoBreakdown

check this out

>Anthony Joshua will easily beat that fat mexican dude
same story is brewing for tonight bros

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You've been training for 5 years and you're only a 4 stripe white? Embarrassing.

heem

>You KNOW you gotta beat somebody... so BEAT ME, if you CAN

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>I know what I'll be watching this evening.
So do I
Porn with big booty kweens

Why is Ball's trunk indicator black and puke green? It looks like black and gold to me.

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odds on tonights card are retarded as fuck, look into it b

boutta drop a major schaub in deep wadders

what a couple of faggot clowns

Why are they adding that filter on the camera to make it look like the sun is going down? I just looked out the window and its the middle of the day. Bongs sure are a peculiar bunch.

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